Fading out

Note to the reader, this is the companion piece to 'Fade to black', I've decided to add more to the story, and it didn't want to leave me. I wanted more, so I wrote more. This piece deals with the after effects of Mycroft's death, the reactions off several people.

Unless you haven't read 'fade to black' this won't make a lot of sense.

Note: Panacea: A solution for all problems

Chapter one

Step by step

The room was bare, except for the table in the middle, the lamp in the corner and two chairs one opposite sides of the table. One side of the room was covered in glass, it was one way glass. The glass you used in interrogations. To door opened and two people stepped in closing the door behind them. Mycroft Holmes moved to one end and Lady Smallwood to the other, she looked to the glass and gave a small nod. The interview is being recorded.

Mycroft sat down, he was wearing a pair of black slacks, and a pale green button down shirt and his black suit jacket, there was no umbrella and no waistcoat. Lady Smallwood was impeccably dressed as always, ready for action.

The atmosphere was sombre, their actions precise.

"Do you want something to drink Mycroft?" Lady Smallwood's asked softly, Mycroft shook his head. He looked around the room and recognized, it was the same one, they had Jim Moriarty in all those years ago, when he scratched Sherlock's name on the glass. Ironic.

"No thank you."

"You know why we are here?"

"Yes. We are here to record the mission, the plan, the effects and my last wishes. We are also here to record my temporary reinstatement in my post, to allow my security clearance to be increased to its previous level, which was unlimited, to inform me about my mission, my last mission." Mycroft uttered the words in a flat tone, as if he was reading the weather report, instead of talking about his life, about the suicide mission, about the fact that they are discussion his death. She swallowed and nodded, sitting down opposite him, her chair was more to the left, so that the camera had an open view to Mycroft.

Lady Smallwood opened one of the several files on the table and handed Mycroft two key cards.

"I, Alecia Smallwood, codename 'Love' hereby reinstate Mycroft Holmes, codename 'Antarctica' to his previous security level of unrestricted and unlimited access. This is temporary instatement for the sole purpose of Operation Panacea…" Mycroft only listened with half an ear, he knows the drill, and he knows the words, he himself have drawn up the procedure document, strange how all the procedures and protocol, he, implemented is now being used on him. He would've laughed at that, if he had the energy or the humour. Irony; a joke in itself. He picked up the two key cards and placed it in his inner pocket, in some way it felt strange to have it back, he may not have lost it so long ago, but still he felt the effects for a long time. It rippled into every aspect of his life.

She went on about the mission, his suicide mission and nodded and 'hmm' and 'yes' in all the right places. They have gone over this previously, when he made the decision while sitting in her office. This was just for the record. His eyes glanced over to the glass, knowing that behind that glass was Alecia's assistant keeping watch on the camera, making sure there are no interference and no tampering. Lady Smallwood promised him that she would take Anthea on under her wing, which she did, Anthea is currently in training to learn all Lady Smallwood's routine, her way of doing things before she officially starts under her. He hasn't seen her; he is not allowed to have any contact with her. It is also one of his protocols, and he really hated that one now.

When she was done, he had to sign the necessary documents. He kept his hold on the pen as he slid the documents over to her, she checked everything is in order put it in the file, tied the ribbon around it and stamped the big old red and bold letters of 'Top Secret' on it

He sighed; it was done now, no turning back. He licked his lips and sat back in the chair, with that gone; it was just the few minor things now. He asked her to be the executioner on his last will and testament so next on the list was that.

"You informed me that you already set up a new Trust in your brother's name, Sherlock Holmes with his share of the family Trust."

"That's correct." Mycroft nodded.

"You also added the name of Dr John Watson and his daughter Rosamund Watson."

"Yes."

"Mycroft…" Alecia started her voice losing that hard edge that she used to conduct this meeting so far.

"He is family, apparently." Mycroft stated, adding the apparently as an afterthought, his eyes staring at something in the corner.

"So are you."

"I'm nothing." Mycroft voice was sharp and to the point. With a sigh she moved on the next set of documents.

"You have split your share in half, with 50% being placed in a separate account for Miss Andrea Brightmann."

"She deserves it." Mycroft face visibly relaxed and a small smile formed around his lips. He looked at her.

"I have not always been the best person to look after, this is recorded as well, tell her, or show her this, I cared for her, I didn't show it the way I was supposed to, but tell her I'm sorry for all of this, she didn't deserve it, not for all her loyalty and hard work and dedication, I know the money will never make up for it, she needs to know that she was one of the most valuable people I ever met, and it was an honour to serve with her."

Lady Smallwood nodded; she didn't trust herself to speak after that. Mycroft has shown more emotion in the past few weeks, than she has ever seen in all their years of working together. Clearing her throat she moved on to the next part.

"The other half of 50% is left to Detective Inspector Gregory Lestrade of Scotland Yard."

"Yes." Here Mycroft leaned closer his body relaxing.

"Did you know he was the first person in more than fifteen years to actually respect my brother? To listen to him? Not because Sherlock demanded it – he always demands and audience – but because he valued my brother? I thought he was idiot, I even told him that, he just laughed at me, and said "It's okay, we're all idiots in this world" then he made sure my brother didn't die as he was throwing his lungs out in his apartment, the only place that was successful in getting him clean and to detox. No hospital or rehab centre, no wellness clinic of Life centre, the detective's apartment. He never asked for anything back, can you imagine that Alecia? We, who on a daily basis year in and year out deals with people with a hidden agenda, with negotiations and here this man steps in and didn't want anything, he wouldn't even allow me to replace the carpet Sherlock ruined in an experiment. What man is that? How does a man like that even exist?" The room was silent after that outburst, Mycroft's voice increased and Alecia thought he might even get up and paced the floor. He took a breath and looked at the documents.

"Make him accept this, I wish I knew how to give him my endless gratitude for saving and helping my little brother, but I'm the ice-man, I don't know how."

Lady Smallwood didn't even think twice, she reached out and took hold of Mycroft's; his hand was cold in hers.

"You are not as cold as you think you are."

Mycroft just smiled in response.

"I mean it Mycroft! What your family did to you was horrible."

Mycroft was startled and confused.

"What they did to me? They didn't do anything to me."

"They did! You were just a boy yourself and you were forced to be the grown-up of the entire family."

"I wasn't the grow-up, uncle Rudy was."

"The hell with Rudolph, he forced you to make the hard decisions, he forced you to be the adult one, it should've been your parents, where were they when your sister tried to kill Sherlock? Where were they when she burned the house down? They should've taken control of the situation, be the parents and made the hard choice, but no, it was left to you. You had to watch your sister become a killer at that young age, you had to watch your brother deleting his childhood memories – with you in it and the love and admiration he had for you – you had to watch your parents pretend nothing is wrong as they moved on with their lives, telling people they only had two children. You had to bear it all, and even now… they still blame you and you…"

"Alecia…" Mycroft tried to interrupt standing up, but she actually jumped up in her chair.

"Shut up, I'm talking now."

Mycroft mouth fell open in shock as he stood there staring at her, his hands by his side. As she talked she started crying.

"And now, I have to watch how you kill yourself, trying to atone for sins that are not yours to carry, to fix problems, that weren't yours to begin with. Yes England will lose a brilliant mind, but I'm losing a colleague, a friend in a feeble attempt to redeem himself, when he hasn't sinned in the first place!" The room was silent and both were staring at each other, Mycroft slowly stepped to her, as she wiped her eyes.

"I'm sorry Mycroft, I didn't mean to lose control like that, I just…I wish…"

Mycroft stood in front of her and for the first time in years he did something on impulse, he hugged her. She buried her head in his shoulder as she cried all over again. Mycroft's eyes were red rimmed as well, he was losing his composure too, it was the first time in many years, that someone took his side, that someone understood what happened and didn't blame him. He didn't had to explain himself, or his decisions, she knew it all and still understand his position, not the suicide and redeeming part, the part where he was force to grow up before it was time. To be the grown-up when everything around him was falling apart.

When they finally pulled apart he turned to her.

"I have one more favour to ask."

"Anything."

"Please tell Sherlock in person, he doesn't deserve to hear it over the phone."

"I will." She softly replied, Mycroft smiled, there's not much he could do now.

He stepped back, moving to the door; Lady Smallwood stopped him by grabbing his shoulder.

"Will you see him before you go?"

Mycroft sighed then slowly shook his head.

"No, I saw him yesterday, my parents too, and Euros, I don't think I can face them, him, again, besides he is busy with his family."

"You are his family."

"He prefers the family he chose, not the one he was born into." Before she could say anything Mycroft opened the door and left, the door closing softly behind him, leaving him alone with her thoughts.

Note: Nina Torelli gave me a beautiful review and I wished I could tell you how much I agree with Nina and your words. I hope you don't mind but I used a thought you had that he was the grown-up in the family, which he was, he was forced into that roll, and yet he gets blamed and the waves of hatred from everyone. It makes me furious and if I was harder on his parents, his brother, John and Mrs Hudson, it is because I'm angry with them, I lost my respect for them and I blame them.

I will eventually forgive them, but right now? Still angry