Title: Friends

Rating: K+

Genre: Friendship/Hurt/Comfort

Summary: Friends are important, Allen realizes, when it comes to keeping him sane.

Disclaimer: I don't own D. Gray Man, so don't sue me.

Notes: Decided to format all of my previous chapters.

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many people will walk in and out of your life

but only a few will leave behind footprints

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Allen's word is black and white, with many gray tones in between.

He acts normally enough, smiling at Lenalee, paying sharp attention to Komui, joking around with Lavi, calling Kanda Bakanda, and more. His appetite is as healthy as heavy, his black side properly restrained until the mention of debts or Cross passes his ears. His arm is fine, Crown Clown being used more often than not. His stormy gray eyes that glinted silver with strong emotion betrayed nothing that showed something was off.

But the moment his left eye—his curse, his gift, his burden, his link to monsters—changes and turns into an unholy red, all he can see are black and white images. Black and white Akuma, their mouths open in a soundless scream, wild eyes wide with inner pain and suffering. To the other Exorcists, they are ugly creatures, minions of the Millennium Earl. They are a danger to society and need to be eradicated.

All Allen sees are enslaved souls, begging for freedom.

It breaks him to see the souls of the dead trapped in the bodies of Akuma, of human-eating machines. Whose fault is it really? The Earl's? The ones who summon their dead loved ones? Allen doesn't know. But he knows that he has to do something. He has to.

Mana...

For a while, after Mana's death, he continuously blamed himself for what had happened. Mana had been the only one to accept him, red wrinkled arm and all. Mana had been a father, a friend a warm body to hug. Mana had been the only thing Allen was living for. Mana had been his world.

And so when Mana died, Allen turned to a strange plump being with a long face, pointy ears, and a smile that promised no good.

"You want me to revive Mana Walker?"

Then Mana's soul had lashed out at him. Mana had cursed him. Mana had shattered his heart as well as well as his left eye, and Allen hadn't been sure what had hurt more.

Innocence...

The memories after had been fuzzy. More than a few nights have Allen resting his head on his pillow, trying to remember the details. He would clench and unclench his left hand, staring at the cross on the back, staring at the blackened nails and the marred red skin. Trying to remember back to the time when his Innocence first came to be.

"Mana...?! No, don't do this to Mana...! Run...run, Dad!"

And Allen would remember that that had been the first time he had ever called Mana his father aloud. He had been too hesitant, too shy to label Mana as Father. But somehow, deep down inside, as the strange white claw-like appendage that was his left hand reached for Mana, he knew he had to say it.

"Allen...I...love you..."

Before Mana died.

"Please destroy me."

Allen loves the Akuma because he sees Mana in them. If Mana had been one of them... He wants to let them pass on peacefully. He wants to walk this path because of Mana.

But along the harsh road, other people found their way into his heart. Kanda, Lenalee, Lavi, everyone in the Order...

Soon, Allen's world isn't just black and white, with only gray in between. There is Kanda's dark hair that shines indigo and violet depending on the light. There is Lavi's bright emerald eye that takes everything in with keen intelligence. There is Lenalee's warm smile that reminded him of the sun.

Everyone...

...thank you.

"Hey, Mana...? I love you. I'll always love you. But—right now, there are other people I love too. Other people I want to protect. Is that—okay?"

Yes.

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