Title: Brother, Let Me Be Your Shelter
Author: ilikecrystals
Characters/Pairings: Sam & Dean
Scenario: Discipline spankings, Dean spanks Sam
Implement: Belt & Hairbrush
Summary: This scene is out of the Season 11 Episode "Baby", where the brothers are talking in the car and Sam admits he kept a secret from Dean. I always wondered at Dean's reaction and thought it should have gone something like this. The first is dialogue from the episode, the next is a segue scene from my imagination. Hope you enjoy:

Author's Notes/Warnings: Multiple punishment spankings; pain kink; spanking anticipation. This is for the 2017 Team Challenge, Team: Emotional; for Speechless category

##

Sam finally decides to let Dean in on his dreams or visions or whatever the hell they are, tired of being alone in all this, and tells his brother he saw their Dad, not the one they knew as kids but the younger version they met in the past, "Whoever it was, they had a message to deliver. They said the Darkness is coming, and only you and I can stop it."

Dean watches him intently, "Did they have him give you any helpful tips on how to do that?"

Sam shakes his head, "He said, 'God helps those who help themselves.' I mean, maybe these visions are coming from God."

"Whoa. Pump the brakes." His brother gives him a searching look, because they both know God's not around anymore.

Sam tries to explain, "I mean, Dean, the first one happened after I prayed."

Dean's eyebrows shoot up, "You prayed? When was this?"

Sam swallows hard, realizes he's gonna be in deep shit in a second, "Back in the hospital."

He's given a scowl, Dean trying to understand, "Why?"

Sam glances away nervously, never told Dean about this and he's not sure how his brother is gonna react, "Because I was infected."

Dean stares at him, eyes going dark with emotions Sam can't identify and he quickly explains, gesturing with his hand, "I was infected. I'm not anymore. I-I-I never went full rabid. I . . ."

His brother closes his laptop, voice lowers to menacing: "You got infected and you didn't even tell me?"

"Dean-" Sam glances nervously at his brother, tries to soothe-

Dean says softly, quiet as a hissing snake, "What did you pray about?"

He shrugs, "I guess I was just looking for answers, you know?"

"Well, I'm sure whatever is kicking around in your head right now is a side effect…" Dean gives him a frustrated, hurt look, "From the infection that you failed to tell me about."

##

And the conversation rolls on, both offering opinions and ideas, working the problem like they have so many times before, surrounded by the car that is their home and it's when they settle down to sleep, saying their 'good nights' to each other with Dean stretched out in the front and Sam curled around in the back that it happens-

It's quiet for a few moments and Sam dozes, almost sliding down into a dreamy haze when he hears his name spoken softly.

He startles, thinks maybe he's already asleep because it's surreal, seems dream-like as he turns his head slowly, sees Dean looming over him from the front seat and his brother's face is stone cold, jaw gritted down with tension and the words, fuck, the words-

"Tomorrow morning, 'fore we get on the road, you and me got a date, Sammy. Your ass and my belt over the hood of the car, gonna show you just how much I like being lied to about you almost dying."

And Sam's heart jumps damn near into his throat, starts pounding in his chest, in his ears so fast, he's almost dizzy, his ass starts to tingle and his throat goes bone-dry, a lump risen there suddenly too big to swallow over and it makes a hard click when he tries-

And he's fucking panting, can't even get air in his lungs because Dean just robbed him of every deep breath, can't move, pinned to the back seat as Dean keeps talking, his angry frown and dark eyes glaring at him with resolve leaving Sam unable to budge or to even think a coherent thought-

"And when I'm done with you? You're gonna be remembering all fucking day just how much I liked being lied to 'cause you're gonna have a damn hard time sitting on it, knowing that you earned the ache in your ass and also knowing that when we pull in for the night, you're gonna get another one over my knee, on your bare ass, with Dad's hair brush. Maybe then you'll think twice before you keep something like this from me in the future. We clear, Sammy? You understand what's gonna happen and why?"

And all he can do is stare at Dean, wide-eyed in the dark, and nod, damn speechless because Dean knows how he is, dammit!

##

Started when he was younger, him and Dean most always in trouble, forever getting their asses beat and he started noticing something-

His whole life, he felt out of control, wild and untamed, his mouth and temper constantly getting away with him so he was always getting yanked over Dad's knee, paddled way more than Dean because he couldn't stop mouthing off, couldn't stop misbehaving, it was like ingrained in him, like a wild hair he couldn't keep under wraps-

Until he got spanked and then it was like he could handle things for a while, keep on the straight and narrow, follow orders like he was supposed to and just be good-

Like he was expected to be. Like Dean always was, without having to have his butt beaten to behave.

God, Sam wished he was more like Dean but he'd always needed the physical pain to get his mind right, to get him to do as he was told and when he'd get spanked, belted, switched or hair-brushed, he'd be better, more obedient and it would last for weeks.

It gave him a peace, a calm that he'd never been able to find anywhere else, it became a source of shame with him that he could only behave when his ass had been lit on fire and what the hell?

Dean realized it early on, knew him better than anyone else and used it when they got older, to get Sam to stay on track and it helped him, it did.

It soothed him, made him not so twitchy in his own skin and the first time Dean had done it, after Dad left them on their own, he was mortified, embarrassed to be jerked over Dean's lap, shorts yanked down and paddled with Dad's hair brush, unable to get away because he was smaller than Dean, younger-

But damn, had it helped him, embarrassed or not.

Still remembered every second of it, sharp and bright in his mind's eye-

##

He'd been out with friends, forgot to tell Dean where he was but it didn't matter, he was too lighthearted to care and he'd come back to the motel without a care, having had a great time at the arcade, drinking sodas and eating chips, mindlessly pumping quarters into Asteroids and he'd lost track of time.

Knew Dean would understand because his brother had done it a hundred times before and Dean loved him, would be happy for him that he'd had a wonderful time.

He'd entered the room, excited to tell his big brother everything, because there was a girl there he'd been trying to impress and Dean would laugh, think that Sam was so cool-

But he'd been jerked down almost as soon as he'd stepped through the doorway, pulled sideways and was across Dean's lap in a heartbeat, staring stupidly at the floor as his brain scrambled, tried to wrap around what he was doing there.

He was aware of two things, Dean catching at the door and swinging it shut right before his shorts and underwear were pulled down fast, his ass bared to the world in record time-

Happened so fucking fast and the first smack to his clenching bottom clarified his feeling brain, centered his focus and damn, he was getting spanked, spanked hard, in it and hollering before he even made the connection in his thinking brain, legs already kicking with the pain of it, his bottom turning hot as hell in seconds-

"Ahhhhh! OWWW, Dean, Dean, what the hell, what are you doing, wait, Ohhhh, OWWW, pleeeaaaassseee Dean, Stop, pleeeeaaassseeee STOP!" The words screamed out of his throat, couldn't help it, they burst through with the red flood of pain, his hands on Dean's thighs, arching up, trying to suck in his bottom, to get away from the worst paddling of his young life-

At least it felt that way because it was Dean doing it, didn't care so much when it was Dad because he didn't really love Dad, not like he did Dean, didn't need to please him but his brother? Was everything to Sam.

And God, he couldn't believe Dean was hurting him like this, Dean loved him and he shouldn't be doing this, beating his ass, making him scream like a baby-

Because Sam was screaming, as loud as he could because it felt like Dean was beating the skin off his butt, tarring the hell out of him and he couldn't think, couldn't do anything but holler, hurt so fucking bad-

Dean spanked him until he stopped screaming, until he collapsed over his big brother's lap and just laid there, taking his smacks without a fight, because he deserved them and Dean didn't scold, didn't lecture like his father did, nope, all Dean did was spank him, until Sam had nothing left, until all he could do was cry and let it go, every bad feeling, every pissed off nerve ending inside of him, he threw it away and became the Good Sam who behaved, who minded and he loved that Sam, wanted to be him all the time.

He was released then, sank to his knees in front of his brother and dove in, hugged tight until Dean helped him to bed, kissed his forehead goodnight and tucked him in, let him relax into the pain and he'd hugged his pillow, at ease finally in his own skin, able to handle life with a clear head so he could make better choices, loved his brother for helping him like this, for righting his brain and resetting his priorities.

##

After that, it happened frequently, Dean hauling him over his lap and spanking the devil out of him and dammit it helped, much to Sam's shame, that he needed that discipline, that direction over his life as he made important decisions. It gave him clarity and calm, let him think things through and it helped-

Until Ruby, until he'd gotten older, full of himself and had stopped listening to Dean. And Dean had gotten hurt by his choices, pulled back on his duties and let Sam, let him make decisions based on feelings and he'd chosen poorly, knows that now, almost killed his relationship with Dean, chosen a demon over him, chosen evil power over his brother's good and it had taken him months to win Dean back, after he realized what he'd done.

But it was never the same between them again.

Gone was the blind trust, the absolute love Dean had for him and Sam knew he'd done irreparable damage to the core of their relationship and no matter what he did, he'd never get it back.

That hurt worst of all.

Because Dean hadn't given him what he needed for forgiveness, for salvation, Sam needed a spanking, at his brother's hand, needed to atone, to apologize but Dean had pulled back, believing Sam was an adult and not craving the connection to his brother that he'd always had.

Can't remember the last time Dean had spanked him and he'd sure deserved it, hell, almost asked for it a few times but couldn't in the end, didn't want Dean to know how weak he was and it had caused a rift between them as brothers, knew it, but he didn't know what to do to fix it-

Sam needed Dean's firm hand, God, he craved it and in the dead of night, when Dean was asleep and Sam was left with his own yearnings, he cried for it, missed the closeness of being pulled over Dean's lap, needed the special connection to his brother that he'd only ever gotten through his spankings because at least it showed how much Dean cared about him.

Missed that connection so bad sometimes.

And now-

Now it's huge, like he's right back there, hungering for Dean's attention, needing his big brother to show Sam the error of his ways and put him back on the right track, on the straight and narrow path and he can't even blink suddenly, so wanting, so needy in his own skin, he's almost sick from it.

Sure the hell can't sleep.

Can't breathe.

Just keeps thinking of being bent over, his naked bottom bared, breathless for the sting of leather, the pain of the belt to set him free, to release him from the constant tension, from the cage of worry he's always surrounded with-

Feels deeply loved for the first time in years, because Dean's gonna take care of him tomorrow, be his big brother again and fuck, he can't wait.

##

Sam falls asleep, Dean's words putting images in his head that soothe, that calm and he goes gently into dreams, his own imagination adding to his tension and he's hot in his skin, his nerve endings alit with expectations and it's a restless sleep, can't settle down because fuck he needs-

##

Dean rouses him in the morning, not even a 'Good morning', just a 'Come on, Sam' as he's pulled out of the car and pushed ahead, shoved down over the hood of the Impala, no coffee, no breakfast, nope, just yanking down of his jeans and shorts, leaving him bare-assed and waiting for his punishment-

He's left waiting, laying on the car, his bottom upended for Dean's attention and fuck, he's hot with anticipation, wants this so bad, he can barely think with it, needs Dean to step up and do the job, make him atone-

And God, his brother always knows just what he needs.

##

The first cut of the belt has him jolting awake, every bit of drowsiness gone in a single smack of leather, the fire slapped across his ass alive and smarting, jerking him upright and he's scrambling for purchase on the hood of the car, fingers clawing at whatever handhold he can get-

The belt smacks again, and again, crisscrossing his bare flesh with the wide leather, each lash going bone deep, warming his bottom inside and out, incredibly scintillating and tantalizing, and he's sticking his butt out, silently asking for more because he wants this so fucking bad-

Dean's voice is low, soft, "God, Sammy, look at you, you need this, don't you? Know I've been slacking, trying to let you figure things out on your own but it's gone past that now, Sam, way past that and now I need to take care of this shit, right the fuck now."

And Dean stops talking then, starts whaling on Sam's ass, whipping damn hard, the belt raising welts, making Sam holler out loud with the pain of it and Jesus, Dean hits with bone-jolting cracks, knows him so well, knows just what Sam needs and it's pain, lots of pain-

It floods his brain, blankets him in heat and flames, the leather turning his backside to pulsing agony, and it's so sweet, so pure that Sam arches up into each strike, begging for more and Dean gives it to him, all Sam needs and more.

Keeps going until Sam is jerking wild, can't stay still, the belt cutting in deep, slashing in low, right across where Sam sits and he can't take much more, the burn of it reaching epic proportions as he throws himself back and forth, writhing and twisting even as he's sobbing out, needing his brother to stop now, he's had enough, "Please, Dean, Ow! Owwwwww, fuck! Can't take anymore, Dean, please!"

But he does take more, takes it all, everything Dean gives him until he's past yelling, past sobbing and can only lay there, letting Dean beat the bad right out of him.

##

Dean helps him up, pulls up his shorts and jeans and gives him a smack with the flat of his hand, "Now get in the car, Sam. We'll go grab some breakfast and get on the road."

"Can't-" He's gasping, wiping at the tears still drying on his face, his body shuddering happily from the spanking, from the release of his tension and he can't control himself, knows he can't possibly sit down because his ass is on delicious fire-

Dean gives him a stern look, "Didn't ask if you could. Told you to do it. Got no problem giving you more until you do what I say, Sam. Your choice."

"Dean-" He starts and sees from Dean's eyes he's about two seconds away from following through on his threat and snaps his own mouth closed, opens the door to the Impala and sits carefully, groans with the scratch of his jeans against his thighs, his bottom hot and tender but he settles in, doesn't say a word because he knows he's got another one coming tonight and doesn't want to make that one even harder by pissing Dean off.

Dean finds a diner instead of drive-through, which Sam was very much hoping to avoid because he knows he looks disheveled and red-faced and also knows he's gonna be squirming though breakfast and not able to help it. But Dean doesn't ask for input and Sam knows he's on thin ice with his brother, so he doesn't complain, just gets out when they park and walks two steps behind when they enter.

He keeps his eyes down so he doesn't have to see anyone, or let them see him, and watches his brother's feet lead them to a table, where he carefully sits and slides across the booth and fuck, that hurts!

God, his bottom is so hot, it's burning right through his jeans and the pressure of the seat makes the tender ache bone deep until it fills his brain, all he can think about and he can't even believe Dean's gonna spank him again tonight and he should at least get a couple of days in between-

Dean orders for him, seems to know he's beyond speaking and easily takes the lead, just like Sam needs him to and he drinks the juice that's placed before him, dutifully eats the blueberry pancake stack his brother ordered, knows that if he doesn't, his ass is gonna get more, because they don't waste food, don't squander money.

Gets coherent over coffee, just for a moment and begs his brother, too emotional to make much sense, "Dean, can I-? My ass, man, hurts, can't keep this up, it-burns like crazy and need-can I? The back seat, maybe lay on my belly so my butt-it just hurts so bad, Dean and I can't-not for all day, I can't it's-too much and I just-please, man, please?"

Dean gives him a fierce look, mouth set to pissed, "So maybe next time, you need to tell me the goddamn truth, Sam and not hide shit from me! Personally, I don't give a flying fuck if your ass hurts because that's the point! it's supposed to! And you will sit on it until you're told otherwise, understood?"

Sam deflates, gives a quiet sob and knows his fate is sealed, can't fight because Dean gives the orders and Sam follows, chain of command in the Winchester world and it doesn't matter that his ass hurts like hell, nope, all that matters is he's in the dog house, that he's gonna get another spanking tonight and he doesn't have a damn thing to say about any of it.

So Sam finishes his coffee, squirming on his hot bottom and waits for Dean to pay the check, dutifully follows his brother back out to the car and gets in, tries to find the least painful position, knows Dean's watching him but he also knows Dean hates this as much as he does but he's teaching Sam a lesson, because he has to, because it's what Sam needs.

##

When they finally pull into the motel, it's late, been damn near twelve hours of sitting, stopped once for gas but he was only allowed to get out long enough to take a piss and then it was right back onto his sore bottom, stretched out in the passenger seat and at least it's not hurting as bad as it was, time and healing helping Sam out and it's just a mild burn back there now, a discomfort when he shifts and he can handle it now without wincing and gasping.

But the damn other spanking looming over him, it's been in his thoughts all day, making him twitch and worry because he knows Dean's gonna follow through no matter what his ass looks like, no matter how much he's already taken. Dean told him it was gonna happen and it's gonna happen.

Fuck.

"There someplace where we can get something to eat?" Dean questions the night clerk because it's after nine and they ain't had much but snacks to get them through the drive and yeah, his stomach is growling pretty loud.

The old man gestures out the door, "All night truck stop about a mile up the road will take care of ya." And he passes Dean two key cards with his receipt.

Dean turns, jerks his head out the door and Sam gets the hint, waits for Dean to pass and follows him out, gets back into his passenger seat and yeah, it's really not so bad now, just a hurtful ache with the initial sit but it's still warm, feeling like it needs a good rub and fuck, Sam wishes he could but he's pretty sure Dean will forbid it, as Dean has forbidden everything that may comfort him.

The diner is hopping, surprisingly, and Dean gestures to Sam to order, seems to know he's coming down from his headspace and can interact with the public again, and crap, he needs a burger like he's never needed before, needs to replenish his energy, gear himself up for what's coming.

Can't even believe all he's done today is think about the paddling that he has coming. It's consumed him, eaten away at him and fueled him all at the same time, left him with a nervous energy he can't contain and he's trembling, excited and scared, pissed off that he needs this and hungry because he needs this and he's gonna be so good from now on, gonna make the right choices and Dean's gonna be so proud of him.

Sam eats ravenously, inhales his burger and fries, running his finger over the plate to get the last bits of fried potato and salt, the comfort food settling warm in his belly as he sucks down his lemonade and he's ready.

Nods at Dean who's looking at him inquiringly because yes, Sam's prepared for his spanking now.

Dean pays the bill and leaves the tip, gesturing Sam to go out before him and they plod to the car, neither wanting what's coming but it's inevitable because it's a promise between brothers, a necessary task that has to be completed and Sam's step is light, knows Dean's gonna take care of him and he can't wait.

##

Back in the motel room, Dean goes to his duffel, gets his father's wide-backed hair brush out and turns to Sam, gestures with a hand-

Dean sits on the bed and Sam unbuttons his jeans, shoves them down and kicks his underwear off too, walks without embarrassment up to his big brother because the man changed his damn diapers and he's got no shame where Dean's concerned.

He lays over Dean's lap, his top half on the bed while his ass is tilted upright perfectly over Dean's knee, his long legs splayed out on the floor behind him and Dean adjusts him, throws a leg over both of his so he's caught there, can't move an inch and Dean's arm is close around his waist, holding him tight, not letting him fly away-

Pretty damn near perfect, in Sam's mind.

The first swing cracks in hard, lands solid on his flesh and Sam's sucking in his breath, clenching his ass cheek because damn, that hurts!

Hates the brush, it's rock hard and unforgiving, when it slams in it makes him gasp and rock with the sudden rush of pain and the damn thing can cover one whole ass cheek at a time, leaving deep marks in his skin and turning him teary in minutes-

The second smack drives Sam forward, has him hissing and arching up because damn, on top of his already sore bottom, the after burn is incredible, not going to be able to take many more of these-

Grabs hold of the edge of the bed with both hands and hangs on tight, tangles his legs with Dean's and puts his head down, lets the pain take him over, embraces it so it calms and soothes him even as it punishes-

It becomes all he knows.

##

His backside is lit up, on fucking fire with each swing in of the cutting hair brush and Sam's already got tears splashing down his face, knows they're not even close to being done because when Dean spanks, he takes Sam home to where there's no fight left and Sam hasn't even started sobbing or apologizing yet.

Dean is spanking him damn hard, thoroughly covering both butt cheeks with hot red, building up to a crimson haze, each swat of the hair brush a jolt of agony shuddering through Sam's body and his feet are kicking now, bottom started to sway back and forth to get away from the painful cracks of wood on his flesh, can't control his movements because he's lost in his own anguish.

The swats become harder and he's jerking up with each one, head flying back, fingers scrabbling in the blanket, clutches and pulls at it while he's hollering out his torment, begging Dean to stop, please stop-

But his brother doesn't stop, instead he gathers Sam to him, pulls his body in nice and tight as he raises the knee Sam is laying over, tilts his butt up even more as his hand swings high in the air and cracks down, lets the brush find its mark on Sam's sit spots and that does it-

Bursts into tears, sobbing like a baby, his words garbled and desperate, needs Dean to hear him, "God, Dean, sorry, so suh-suh-SORREEE, didn't mean to lie, I'll try harder, be better from now on, I promise! Please, please, hurts so bad, PLEASE, need you to forgive me and love me, need you to still love meeee…"

The hairbrush stops and a hand strokes up through his hair, ruffling it, "Sammy, I need you to listen to me and listen good. I will always forgive you. Always. And love you? With every breath in my body, man. Gonna bring you on home, now, Sam. Almost done so you're just gonna give it up to me, okay?"

His breath is hitching, can't barely see through his tears but he nods, hunches over and pushes his butt up toward his brother, can't say anymore but he can show Dean his needs without words, knows Dean will get it-

Dean's voice is satisfied, "Yeah, Sammy, that's it. Just a little bit more now."

And Dean lays into him anew, cracking down on one ass cheek at a time, bringing the fire to inferno levels and holding Sam down, not letting him budge-

The smacks are white hot, pulsing red, his bottom sweet fire and it's there, lost in aching burn that's now goes bone deep, that he's able to finally let go, ceases yelping, his jerking slowing and stopping until finally, with a shuddering breath, he settles, drops face down onto the bed and just loses himself in the pain, the hot flames in his backside turning to a delicious flood of control, of calm and yeah, that's it, just there, perfect, what Sam needs, all he needs.

But Dean doesn't stop, still keeps pounding in, alternating on the tops of his thighs now, and it hurts so bad, he should be screaming with it but Sam doesn't, nope. He takes it silent because he can, because it's easier now, not so sharp and real, it's removed and Sam's lost in the fog of it, in the hazy richness that's half-sting, half-caress and God, he loves his brother, loves that he does this for him, heals him, fixes the core of him and Sam hitches up on his toes, up, pushing his hot ass up for more, begging for it even as he breathes through it, still crying but quieter now, sniffling and hitching breath, every nerve ending relaxed and pliant.

Lost in the easy wave of it, knows he should be fighting for control, fight his brother for power but he can't, doesn't want to because Dean dominates him, always has, his big brother never hesitating to show Sam the error of his ways, controlling this-

And Sam needs him to. Fuck, does he need him to.

##

He's sniffling softly now, his mind calm and focused, knows how he has to behave now, his hot backside teaching him, imbedding the punishment in his mind and Dean pulls him up, helps him to his feet but he can't stand, legs weak and helpless and he falls to his knees, lunges forward, throws himself at his brother and Dean catches him, envelops him in warm arms and hugs close, lets Sam draw strength from him.

Dean gathers him up, swings Sam's arm around his shoulders and lugs him to his bed and he knows he looks ridiculous, clinging t-shirt on top and bare-ass down below, his scarlet red backside on display but Dean doesn't mind, just lays him down carefully, tucks him in, kisses his forehead and strokes his hair, his words and actions soothing, so soothing, "Sleep, Sammy. You're gonna be okay now and I'm not gonna let you go anymore, gonna give you what you need and not let it get to this point again. Made a mistake, thought you'd be better off making decisions without me but that was wrong, didn't watch out for you like I shoulda. I got your back from now on, though, kid. Just like always."

Sam relaxes down, gives Dean a watery smile, voice hoarse from hollering, "Thanks, Dean."

And he hugs his pillow, closes his eyes and promises himself that he's gonna make damn sure to tell Dean everything from now on, never gonna hold anything back again because he learned his lesson well today, doesn't ever want to get two spankings in one day again-

Can't deny it, thought, he's a damn sight better than he was last night, both in mind and body, and he's gonna be so good from now on, do all the things Dean expects him to do so he can make his big brother proud.

And this time, when sleep takes him, Sam falls into it deep and relaxed, safe and loved, knows now that Dean will always take care of him and the thought makes him damn happy, happier than he's been in a long time.

##

Dean watches Sam sleep, sees his breath hitching from the crying he'd done early but the peace on his brother's face means he'd done the right thing, given Sam exactly what he needed.

He wonders if Sam will ever figure out that Dean yearns for these sessions just as much as he does, that the bond it creates between them makes Dean just as happy, just as content.

And he shrugs, what Sammy doesn't know won't hurt him and Dean's sure the hell not gonna tell him. As long as it makes Sam better, Dean ain't gonna say a word.

##