I wrote this AU a few years ago, and I've cleaned it up a lot since then. AUs are the best.
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The Uchiha and Son Legal Firm was the most respected law firm in the city, if not the whole prefecture. It had been tackling cases in nearly all branches of the law for nearly a hundred years under the steady hand of the Uchiha family. The current senior partner, Uchiha Madara, had been working there since he graduated twenty years previously. His field was International Law, and he brokered deals and negotiated contracts across the globe.
The newest junior partner, and Madara's most favoured protege, was his nephew Uchiha Itachi. Itachi was already gaining a reputation as one of the fiercest criminal prosecution lawyers in the city despite only recently completing his traineeship. Word of mouth was beginning to spread, and Itachi was becoming one of the most sought after legal professionals in an already prestigious firm. With so much work he needed a secretary, and his most recently hired aide was his little brother's close friend; Haruno Sakura.
Itachi was brilliant, but not the easiest man to cope with personally. He had always been a quiet, withdrawn boy, and as he aged it had morphed into something approaching severity. A chronic perfectionist he expected the best not only from himself, but from those he worked with. His last secretary had quit nearly a year previously, and his resignation letter had been filled with terms like 'unreasonable demands' and 'unbearable stress'.
Madara had despaired of finding him someone who could cope with anywhere near the level of skill and discretion necessary. It was an off-hand comment by Madara's sister-in-law that provided the answer. Uchiha Mikoto was a nurse at the University Hospital and was best friends with its Director, a terrifying woman affectionately referred to by the medical staff as Tsunade-hime. Tsunade had adopted the daughter of another nurse and another of Mikoto's friends, Haruno Mebuki, after the car accident that killed her and her husband.
Haruno Sakura was doted on by Mikoto, and rarely a day went past where the girl wasn't mentioned in conversation. Madara had been enduring an evening listening to his brother bray about the police force's most recent achievements, when Mikoto had mentioned Sakura had passed the first year of her law degree with the highest marks since Itachi had attended that university. Madara immediately tuned out Fugaku in favour of grilling Mikoto about the girl.
He'd never paid much attention to the flash of pink that he'd frequently seen around the Uchiha complex over the years, but he had always prided himself on being able to identify opportunities. It turned out Sakura's main interest in the law was to work with her adopted mother in settling medical lawsuits, and had proven herself to be a natural at the work required. She had also put up with Itachi and his arguably ruder brother Sasuke for years; so much so that Mikoto was convinced she would marry one of them. Madara couldn't say he cared who's wife she became so long as she became Itachi's assistant.
He'd set up a meeting with her and Itachi for the next working day. Delayed by an inopportune phone call he'd arrived late only to discover the two of them arguing over the case she was currently studying for the extra-credit summer classes. Itachi had reduced at least one woman to tears over the years, but Sakura wasn't having any of his attitude. She'd definitely picked that up from her adoptive mother. Itachi had suspected his uncle's intentions, and had been using the impromptu time alone with Sakura to vet her himself. The years had been kind to her, and there was no trace of the bratty little girl he remembered Sasuke prying off when they were children. He was impressed. Madara was impressed enough that he offered her the job immediately. That had been nearly a year previously, and she'd proven herself to be the best employee they'd ever held onto.
Sakura had worked every summer since she was sixteen in the records department of the hospital, but even that hadn't prepared her for the state in which Itachi's files had been left. With so many different assistants over the time he'd been working, and apparently all with different ideas on how to store files, they were a mess. She'd spent her first month sorting them all out, and even now hardly allowed Itachi near her perfect systems. The same spirit extended to all her work, and Itachi was no longer sure how he had ever coped without her. She only worked part-time around her studies, but the impact she had on the running of his affairs was disproportionate. Even his clients had nothing but praise for the way she dealt with them while they waited in the her office before they went into his. Madara, naturally, became unbearably smug about the whole affair.
It was nothing but a win-win situation for Sakura. She got paid an excellent wage, far above what other interns were getting, and she got the much-needed experience for her own fledgling career in the law. Itachi was as supportive of her studies as he was able to be. She wasn't allowed to handle anything confidential or highly sensitive, but he often left his office door ajar so she could listen to his consultations. He also gave her the responsibility of drafting his documents. It was a real sign of the respect he had for her. Even though they took up a ridiculous amount of his time Itachi had always dealt with his paperwork personally. He'd never trusted any of his previous aides with it, but it was only a few months before he delegated the responsibility to Sakura. Her university coursework had already been of a high standard, but after actually writing legal documents most days she was fast becoming the darling of the Law Department.
"Sakura-san?" Itachi called from his office, "Can you get me the Asuza file?"
Itachi always called her Sakura-san at work, even though she'd been little Sakura-chan to him since his brother had first toddled back from nursery trailing tiny, smitten girls behind him.
"Of course, Itachi-san, but remember you're meeting your father at one for lunch. He said he'd come up here and get you if you're late this time," Sakura reminded him as she flicked through the files in the cabinet. Nearly everything was electronic these days, except for lawyer's files.
Itachi barely looked up from his work as she passed him the file, "I've told Taniko-san not to let him in, even father won't cross her," he said wryly.
Sakura snickered; Taniko was a terrifying Uchiha matriarch who hadn't taken any nonsense from anyone in forty years and wasn't about to start now. She'd worked as the main receptionist for the firm since the days of Itachi's grandfather, and how much control she had over everyone was their worst kept secret.
"No, he won't, but Mikoto will. You know how she gets when she think's you're not eating enough," Sakura teased.
Itachi grimaced; "I suppose you're right, I can live without her fussing. Who am I meeting this afternoon?"
She recognised his typical gambit of ending any conversations about Mikoto's near-obsessive worry about her boys, and listed his appointments off. "Kakashi-san will be here at half two to talk about his estate again, and then you have Inuzuka-san at four regarding the damage to the practice."
Itachi rolled his eyes at the mention of his ridiculous old teacher, "Is that everything?"
"Kisame did leave a message saying that he was taking you out on the town tonight, but apart from that, that's everything."
Kisame was one of Itachi's closest friends, one of the few he had, and could not have been more different personality-wise. The giant businessman was well over six feet of solid muscle and good humour. Kisame had always seemed to like Sakura, and had always been kind to her even when she'd been an awkward teenager hiding behind her hair whenever they ran into each other at the Uchiha compound. Since Itachi had started working for the firm Kisame had taken it upon himself to make sure that the man had something approaching a functional social life. Itachi groused that he was just a mother-hen, and didn't have enough to occupy his time.
"Do I have any excuses left?" he asked hopefully.
Sakura snorted, "None that Kisame will fall for."
"None?"
"Well, I suppose it can be your parents' anniversary? No one remembers when other people's parents' weddings were," she said confidently.
Itachi scoffed, and Sakura shook her head in amusement. Of course he knew everyone's important dates, and the important dates of anyone related to those people, but he was a intellectual prodigy. There weren't many people like him in the world.
"You know if you say that he'll call your bluff so hard," she reminded him as he finally started getting his jacket on to go meet Fugaku.
Itachi muttered, "I know," under his breath and waved absentmindedly as he left Sakura in the office for her lunch.
She pottered around tidying up a few papers before settling back at her desk and popping open her bento. Around the corner from her flat, and on the way to work, was a little cafe that sold pre-made lunches for a fraction of what they usually cost. Tsunade had never been able to cook, and Sakura had never learned. Their regular diet was their shared secret shame, and they'd both sworn to always appear like they ate properly in public. Sakura made sure any lunch she brought to work was transferred from the store's packaging into her own before she approached the office. Itachi probably knew she didn't eat much beyond take-out at home, but then he knew everything. Just so long as he didn't tell Mikoto.
Her phone chimed to tell her she'd gotten an email just as she broke her chopsticks to start. Her friends had finally forced her to leave the previous century behind and get herself a smart phone. She still wasn't sure how half the things worked and she missed her old brick of a phone, but she would begrudgingly admit it was useful to have all her social contacts all in one place. Somewhere along the line she'd given her email to some site she shouldn't have, and the vast majority of her emails were spam. Occasionally, though, she got an email from her idiot best friend.
Naruto had never really settled on what he wanted to do when he left high-school, but he'd always known he'd wanted to travel. Jiraiya, Tsunade's oldest friend and the infamous smut author, had taken the boy under his wing when Sakura had introduced them. The old goat talked of nothing but his glory days hitch-hiking and camping across the world in his youth. Naruto was willing to call Jiraiya on a lot of his bullshit, but the idea of seeing other countries had stuck. After they'd left school he'd thrown himself into working two or three jobs at a time to build up funds for a year.
Then he'd set off on his great round-the-world trip working and volunteering to experience it all. He'd travelled west through Asia for months, and he was now currently somewhere in Europe. It was all he'd talked about for the last two years of high-school, so no one was surprised when he jetted off. The only thing that was surprising was that Sasuke went with him, and that Sakura didn't.
Sakura had always planned to go straight to university. She'd always kind of thought gap-years were a waste of time, and left you with a gap on your CV. That meant she'd never really involved herself that much with Naruto's chatter beyond encouraging him and trying to suggest the least dangerous places for him to go. Sasuke had always brushed him off, like he'd always done when Naruto was passionate about anything. Naruto had many strengths though, and his greatest was his infectious enthusiasm. While Sakura had been stressing over university and funding applications as well as doing a hundred and one things to boost her employability, Sasuke and Naruto had fallen into serious planning.
Everyone had expected her to be heartbroken when they announced their plans. She wouldn't lie; it had stung, but really it was more that she was planning her own future rather than them leaving her out of theirs. Naruto had been devastated when it had finally filtered through to him how it must have looked to her, and he'd become almost unbearably clingy. By the time they'd gone Sakura was quite glad to see the back of him for a while. Sasuke hadn't acted any differently, but then he had never been phased by other peoples' feelings.
Naruto wrote just as he spoke: a completely unedited stream of consciousness. The two of them were in Austria, and the files he'd attached contained nothing but pictures of cakes. He generally dropped her a few lines every other day, while Sasuke wrote maybe once a fortnight. Naruto's were relentlessly upbeat; he loved everything they saw and did, and he loved everyone they met and did things with. Sasuke's were much more restrained and mostly focussed on what they'd actually done rather than how he'd felt about anything. Even though they'd been away just over a year now there didn't seem to be a trace of home sickness with either of them. Sure Naruto went on and on about how much he missed her and all his other friends, but he didn't seem in any rush to come on home.
Sakura loved hearing from her boys, but she also dreaded it. Every new message meant she had to come up with a reply that didn't mention she'd taken the job working for Itachi. It was ridiculous, but Sasuke had always planned to do a law degree as well. He'd idolised Itachi forever, and was only interested in following in his footsteps. Every time Itachi had lost, or sacked, another assistant Sasuke had pointed out he would soon be doing his degree and could take that job. In fact he was so sure of it he'd even mentioned it to Sakura not long before he'd left that as soon as he made it back to the country he was bound to take over from whoever had it.
To tell him that she'd taken the job almost as soon as he'd gone was too awkward. Now of course she'd left it too long and it was even more awkward. She'd had to resort to begging everyone not to tell him. Itachi was willing to indulge her; no one knew his brother's temper better than him. Fugaku had been all for telling him, thinking it would encourage him to get back home and stop gallivanting around. Mikoto, out of sympathy for everyone involved, had overruled him. Madara didn't really care, but he wasn't about to give up on Sakura, not after how efficient she'd proved herself.
She wasn't sure what she was going to do when he eventually did make it back. Guiltily she found herself wishing he would stay away another couple of years just so she wouldn't have to deal with it. As usual she filled her reply with what she was doing at university, and what their friends were up to, hoping that it would cover the huge gap in her time that she couldn't tell them about. Naruto couldn't be trusted to keep a secret – his big mouth hadn't gotten any better with age – so she couldn't risk sharing it with him. He would be hurt, but he'd understand. Hopefully he'd even mediate the fall-out once Sasuke found out. Tsunade had constructed almost her entire life around avoiding awkward conversations, and in this case Sakura was prepared to follow her lead. It would all work itself out, probably.
Itachi had only one criticism of Sakura, and that was that her face revealed everything she was thinking. His lunch with his father had been circumspectly brief as always, and he'd made good time back to the firm. He'd always been able to move silently, so much so that his mother kept threatening to put a bell on him, and Sakura hadn't noticed him appear in the doorway. If he was a betting man he'd say she was worrying over his little brother again. Her drawn brows, and chewed lip said it all. It was something he would have to train out of her before she became a lawyer. She had all the spirit she needed, but a little more subtlety was often required.
Sakura started, as she always did when he re-appeared around her suddenly, and immediately smoothed out the traces of anxiety. She knew she was being ridiculous, and that was enough for him.
"Can I have all the files for Kakashi-san?" he asked as he hung his coat back up inside his office. Kakashi had been wrangling with the other participants in his late father's estate for years, and even though Itachi was a criminal lawyer he'd been roped in to try and make a difference.
"Already on your desk, Itachi-san," she said, "You remember the red -"
"Is the most recent, blue for last year, and yellow for anything before that," Itachi recited back to her exactly what she'd told him about her cataloguing system. Hatake's files had been horrific – it had taken her several days to piece everything together into date order.
He smirked slightly at the exasperated look she gave him. He'd been teasing her since she was about four, but she'd only been picking up on it for the last couple of years. It had been fun watching her realise that.
"Yes – just be careful with the original will, if it gets any more damaged it'll be useless," she continued.
Kakashi had been one of her favourite teachers at high school. She never would have guessed that he was hiding such a turbulent private life behind his laconic facade. Though Itachi was a few years older Kakashi had been one of his favourite teachers too. She expected he'd probably already figured it all out though.
The inter-com buzzed and Taniko's steely voice announced that there was a 'Mr Hatake' at recepion ready to see Itachi. The distaste in her tone was pretty clear, and true enough when Kakashi appeared in the doorway he was dressed in rumpled clothes and wearing his ever-present medical mask. He'd always said he wore it so he didn't catch anything off his students, and wouldn't hear any of Sakura's reasoning on it's limited effectiveness. She supposed now that there was more to it, but she wasn't going to pry. It had been a hobby of every student to try and catch him without it. She, Naruto, and Sasuke had probably come the closest, but now she saw Kakashi as a person in his own right; rather than just a teacher.
"Uchiha-san is as lovely as always, Itachi," Kakashi drawled after bowing to them both, "Is she still married? Wouldn't be interested in an old bachelor like me?"
Sakura giggled, and he smiled fondly at her. She'd always been a precocious student, and now she wasn't allowing Naruto and Sasuke to dictate her limits she was excelling. He was willing to take no small amount of credit for her development, and seeing her always put him in a good mood.
"I'm afraid she is still married, Kakashi-san, I'll be sure to alert you if that changes," Itachi replied, moving towards his office and letting Kakashi walk in before him.
"How does she feel about dogs?" he asked as the door closed, and Sakura shook her head. Kakashi was serious rarely enough that she still remembered the times it had happened. All of about three of them.
Kakashi's wasn't an easy case, and they stayed locked away in Itachi's office for over their allotted time. Itachi was always willing to be lenient with Kakashi, and he knew as well as Sakura that Inuzukas were rarely on time for anything. If it didn't involve animals in some way it was considered a very low priority for them. Their veterinary practice seldom ran out of emergency cases that required all hands on deck. Inuzuka-san that was supposed to be meeting Itachi was one of Kiba's more distant relatives, and he thankfully wasn't involved in the ugly custody battle that was currently raging in that branch of the family.
By the time she finally appeared, apologising profusely and explaining into far too much detail about just what had been keeping her, Kakashi was just leaving. He lingered for a moment with her and they discussed Naruto and Sasuke's grand journey. Sakura had been surprised that Naruto hadn't tracked down any and all means of reaching Kakashi to keep him in the loop, but then Kakashi had always been very private.
"You be sure to tell him to get in touch with Iruka more often – you know how he worries," Kakashi finished, "And you aren't to work too hard. Itachi can be a real task-master."
Sakura smiled, he wasn't wrong, "I know, but I'm very lucky to get to work here – besides, Mikoto needs me to make sure he actually leaves the office sometimes."
Kakashi cocked his head to the side and grinned broadly at her, she assumed, "I think it's more that they're very lucky to have you working here."
She blushed, and he made a quick exit before she could thank him. He was an excellent teacher, but any and all gratitude made him intensely uncomfortable. She'd once bought him a best teacher mug after he'd helped her get the top scores in her exams, and he hadn't spoken to her for a week. It did live on his desk, but nobody was allowed to mention it.
Itachi's meeting with Inuzuka was over much quicker, but not before Kisame had charmed his way past Taniko and settled himself in the office.
"I didn't realise you'd be here so early, Kisame-san," Sakura smiled as she watched him barely fit onto the small sofa across from her desk, "Can I get you anything?"
He grinned toothily at her – apparently he was known as 'the shark' in the circles he ran in - "I have to be here early, Sakura-chan, otherwise Itachi would stay true to his boring nature and sneak off home. Tea, please."
She giggled, "I passed your message on – he didn't say he wouldn't go?"
"I know you did, and I also know that you're covering for him," Kisame smirked over at her, "We'll have to teach you to lie better, my dear, your face gives you away."
"Kisame-san! I'm offended," she said, her hands coming to settle on her hips in a way that made her more like Tsunade than ever, "He never said he wouldn't go – that's the honest truth."
Kisame laughed aloud – the sound a deep bass rumble that Sakura confessed to finding oddly comforting. He often teased her ferociously now he felt she was confident enough to take it. She wouldn't have been able to handle it a few years before, but now she was so much better at not taking everything as a personal attack.
"Alright, alright, but he did ask for excuses didn't he?" he pried, still smirking at her.
Sakura admitted a defeat and shrugged, "He might have done, yes" she allowed with a smile.
"He must really be scraping the barrel for them by now," Kisame snickered, "Did you manage to come up with any?"
"None that you would have fallen for – do you know when Itachi's parents' wedding anniversary is?" she couldn't help but ask out of curiosity.
"July 17th," Kisame rattled off without even a pause, "Is that really what he was going to go with?"
Sakura couldn't even bring herself to be surprised – Itachi wouldn't make friends with anyone who wasn't on his level. Kisame was his very best friend, besides Uchiha Shisui of course. The things they could all remember were just astounding.
"Well, I did say you wouldn't have fallen for it," Sakura laughed, "He works really hard you know."
Kisame nodded sagely, "He does – which is why it's my personal duty to make sure he relaxes once in a while. If that takes alcohol then that's what it takes. You should join us, you know, God knows you work just as hard.
The pleased surprise must have shown on her face because Kisame was looking at her even more fondly. Itachi's friends had always occupied that position of unattainable coolness that had forever flustered Sakura and her friends. They were older, more street-wise; Deidara and Sasori were even artists. Actual honest to god artists that were known all over the world. They were media darlings and constantly on the front of magazines that Sakura didn't feel intellectual enough to buy. Other than those two Itachi had also fallen into a very strange friendship with a Jashinist priest called Hidan. Jashinism was considered something of a fad, and their adherents weren't taken very seriously. Mikoto had originally been appalled when Itachi had introduced them, but Hidan was nothing if not charming. Insane, of course, but charming.
"You wouldn't want -" she started, but cut herself off when she saw Itachi's door open.
Inuzuka-san looked a bit shell-shocked, but then a lot of people did when they came out of a one on one meeting with Itachi. Having that laser-like intensity focussed solely on you could be something of an experience when you weren't used to it. Sakura had been dealing with Uchiha's long enough that it no longer phased her, and she'd become something of an expert of coaxing others back into the real world. Inuzuka-san had just left after sorting out their next meeting when Itachi reappeared. He was not at all surprised to see Kisame lounging with a cup of the speciality tea Sakura kept in her drawer specifically for when he came to the office.
"Good to see you, Kisame, I can tell you're working hard today," he said, raising an eyebrow very slightly at his oldest friend.
Kisame raised his cup in greeting, "As always, Itachi. Ready for tonight?"
Itachi knew he'd been snared and accepted it with grace, "I'm sure you have it all planned out."
"Naturally," said Kisame smugly, "I have a table at Kanda's, and then Deidara wants to check out the new bar down the street."
Itachi grimaced slightly, "Will there be karaoke?" he asked, in a tone that did nothing to mask his true feelings on belting out a tune in front of strangers.
"What do you think?" Kisame asked with raised eyebrows, grinning his sharp grin at the look on his friend's face, "You ever heard Itachi sing, Sakura-chan?"
Sakura had known Itachi most of her life, but Itachi was Itachi; she couldn't even imagine him singing. It would go one of two ways: either he had a wonderful voice in addition to all the other things he was good at, or it was the one thing he was terrible at. She liked and respected him, but she really hoped it was the second one. Hanging around someone so talented wasn't good for your self-esteem, but she was a karaoke veteran. It was Tsunade's second favourite pastime when she'd had a few drinks. It could be the one thing Haruno Sakura was better at than him.
"You haven't?" Kisame checked when she shook her head, "Well we can fix that – you should definitely come along tonight."
Sakura flushed and waved her hands, "I don't want to crash your night – you wouldn't want me there showing you up at karaoke," she demurred.
She happened to know the Kisame was an excellent singer, and she'd heard a drunken Deidara crooning around the Uchiha compound over the years, but that wasn't the point. It was so flattering to be asked, but she couldn't possibly go. Kanda's was the sort of place that unless you were Kisame you would have to book weeks in advance to get a table. It was the sort of place where they didn't put the prices on the menu, and where the waiters knew more than she ever would about seasonal food and the quality of the drinks. There was no way she could afford to pay her share, not if she wanted to eat for the rest of the month. That wasn't the only problem either.
If Deidara was going to be there then likely Sasori would be too. The press would never pass up an opportunity to cover their exploits and splash it all over the media. They knew better than to write about Itachi, no doubt after receiving some cease and desist from the firm, and Kisame used the attention to his advantage. Sakura, the law student, didn't have the same sort of insulation from the realities of hanging out with two internationally famous people. She'd already been caught up in one frenzy where she'd gone to one of Deidara's exhibitions with Itachi on opening night, and Deidara had spoken to her. The press had styled her as his 'mystery muse' for about a week and no one let her forget it. To go out to dinner with him, even with other people there, might rake it all up again.
She probably could have laughed it off and dealt with it easier if it wasn't for her thoroughly concealed, hopeless, pathetic, but nevertheless very real attraction to Deidara.
Once she'd finally gotten over her feelings for Sasuke, and then the deep cringing embarrassment for how she'd behaved, she'd finally started recognising that other men could, and did, hold a candle to him. Naruto had scared off most of the guys she tried to see, but once he'd been caught up in planning his trip she'd been able to do some casual dating. There'd even been a brief fling with Neji before they'd mutually agreed they were better friends. It wasn't like there was a lack of men in her life so it wasn't she was left to pine over her friend's older brother and his friends, it just so happened they were some of the most eligible bachelors in the city.
Deidara had always been the other flash of yellow in the Uchiha compound over the years, and not necessarily a quieter one. There was five years between Itachi and Sasuke, and that might as well have been a century for teenagers. Sakura had only spoken to Deidara a handful of times over the years before she'd started working for Itachi. He'd treated her with the cordial disdain that any shrieking teenage girl, especially one who would not shut up about Sasuke, deserved. In turn she'd hardly paid him any attention, and only really thought about him when he appeared in the news.
When she'd taken the position at the firm she'd become more than just Sasuke's irritating friend, and it showed in Itachi's circle's reactions to her. They weren't exactly at the pinky-swearing best friends forever stage, but they were genuinely warm in their brief interactions. It was these brief interactions had also led her to the realisation that Iwano Deidara was devastatingly attractive.
She'd poured over it with Ino, nothing was concealed from Ino-pig, and come to the decision it was all about the smile. That, and the serious hair envy. Of course it was completely hopeless to have a crush on him. Not only was he internationally famous, recognised pretty much everywhere he went, and that his last three girlfriends had all been supermodels, but he treated her like a little sister. Of course he did; Itachi was like a brother to him, and that's how Itachi treated her so it was natural his friends would follow suit.
Ino had suggested all number of ludicrous schemes to get him to realise she was a woman in her own right, and Sakura had said no to every one. Things like that hadn't worked when they were dumb kids, and it was never going to work now. The only real course of action was to get over the ridiculous attraction and retain her dignity in front of a group of people she genuinely respected. Besides, she attended a large university and Tsunade was always giving her number out to hunky orderlies so she was bound to meet someone else soon. She had enough on her plate to worry about without adding pining over an artist as well.
Kisame chuckled, "Come now, Sakura-chan, no one shows me up at karaoke," he said, with the supreme confidence of a man for whom that was probably true.
"I'm sure we'll see about that Kisame-san," she teased, "but I'd be interrupting your boys' night."
Kisame was about to protest, but Itachi stepped in, "Kisame, you can prove your singing superiority another time."
Itachi had been watching her and, while it was clear she was pleased to be invited, he'd seen the discomfort in her face too. Kisame tended to forget that not everyone had access to the vast wealth he'd collected over his years in business, and Sakura was most likely thinking she couldn't afford it. Kisame would pay for her meal without a second thought, but he had a feeling she'd stress about it for months.
"Besides, you'll get to make sure both of us relax at mother's soiree next week," he continued.
Sakura nodded, "Mikoto doesn't let me or Tsunade-shishou miss her evenings, and I know Shisui has a karaoke machine."
Kisame could certainly be as tenacious as a shark, but he could respect a boundary when he saw one, "A contraband karaoke machine, I bet. Your father would never allow something approaching fun on his property."
Itachi shrugged delicately, "Shisui has always been fond of bending the rules."
"You're damn right. If it wasn't for his influence growing up I dread to think what I'd have had to work with when I met you," Kisame barked a laugh,
"That's Friday next week isn't it? It's a deal, Sakura-chan, we'll put your boasting to the test!"
Sakura laughed, a combination of genuine amusement at Itachi's faux-unimpressed face and relief at having wiggled out of Kisame's very generous offer, "It's so on, Kisame-san."
"I would like the compound to remain standing if at all possible," Itachi implored them.
"If Mikoto doesn't control Tsunade-shishou's intake I can't make any promises," she said solemnly while Kisame snickered in the background.
Realising the time Kisame drained his tea, and stood up to give Itachi a very pointed look. Itachi rolled his eyes and began the process of shutting up his office for the night as Sakura did the same. Mostly it just involved powering down her computer, locking the drawers, and taking the crockery out to the sink area down the hall. Kisame lurked in the doorway, as if Itachi would ever do something as undignified as make a run for it.
The other people in the building barely looked as they walked down the stairs out to the street. It was a marker of how familiar they were with them as all three often drew stares. Kisame was an almost literal giant, Sakura had bright pink hair, and any Uchiha were immediately identifiable. Kisame had his driver waiting outside. He usually preferred to drive himself, but he was nothing if not sensible about safety especially when he was drinking. Sakura's flat was within walking distance, and she had to pick up a few things on the way home so she excused herself with a hope that they had a great night.
"Just a second, Sakura-chan," Kisame said, pulling out his phone, "I'll add you to the chat we have for Mikoto's evenings – what's your number?"
Sakura let Itachi show her where her own number was stored on her complicated phone and almost immediately received notification that she'd been added to the group chat titled 'Embarrassing Itachi Erryday'.
"I think Deidara named that one," Kisame laughed, "Expect it to live up to it."
Itachi grimaced slightly but remained stoic about the whole affair. She giggled, but cast him a reassuring look that he appreciated. They'd known each other for nearly two decades, and the boys couldn't do anything worse than his mother already had.
"Good to see you as always, Sakura-chan! See you next week," Kisame said, hustling Itachi off to the car so they could make their reservation.
Sakura waved, and as soon as they were out of sight began checking the group chat details as she walked.
She already had Itachi's number, and Shisui's, and now Kisame's, but the other four in the group were a mystery for now. If she had to guess they would be Sasori, his assistant Tobi, Hidan, and Deidara. She had access to Deidara's phone number. It was impossible to suppress the – totally ridiculous - frisson of excitement, and she practically bounced home. She could face the fact it meant less than nothing once she'd let herself enjoy it a bit. Ino would die when she heard about this.
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