Note: So the premise is Vegeta takes the dragon balls to wish Nappa back to life. Nappa refuses. Incredulous, Vegeta demands the dragon send Nappa to speak to him for 30 minutes. This is their conversation. I'm currently writing a longer story, and this came out and doesn't really fit the plot. So here's a weird little one shot.

.-.-.

Nappa appeared there in the same clothes he had died in- or rather lack thereof. His black spandex underwear exposed thighs as thick as tree trunks. The man was so huge, Vegeta was somewhat surprised he had forgotten how much the other dwarfed him. Yemma could have at least clothed the hulking cretin.

"Well, shit," The bald man cursed at him. You couldn't have picked a worst place to do this, Vegeta." The giant accused, hugging himself against the cold rain.

"What is your problem?" Vegeta said, batting away the small talk. He didn't have time for this.

"My problem? What is yours? Just move on."

"I'm offering you your life back, you mouth-breathing goon. You'd rather spend a millennia in purgatory?"

Nappa shrugged and leaned against a boulder on the cliffside. The waves crashed below them, the sea breeze battering them with salty, pungent gusts. "Maybe I like purgatory. At least, in comparison to this-" He waved his giant, sausage-fingered mitt. "This aimlessness."

Vegeta tucked his chin, feeling as though Nappa's interpretation of 'this' was also a backhanded dig at him. 'This' is what he had chosen. What was wrong with 'this'? "I took your life from you. You don't want it back?"

"To do what with? You're a grown man, Vegeta. You haven't needed me in ten years. Besides, there's no more CD, no more pointless wars and no more rebels to beat down. There's no point to me here. I'm a 65-year-old, lifelong soldier." The man smiled wryly and snorted. "What would I do? Settle down on Earth and live a quaint little life as a civilian among these baby-skinned humans?" He laughed at the absurdity, and Vegeta admitted to himself that he couldn't imagine it either. "I am what I am. I can't assume a whole new identity at this point. You're still young, Vegeta. You have a whole new life ahead of you, with a whole other purpose. I… just want to start over. If I ever figure out this whole purity thing, maybe I'll be reincarnated as a … burly, young king…. You know, with a harem."

Vegeta rolled his eyes. Nappa had the kind of character that would get him reincarnated as a rat or maybe a worm. "Are they all there?" Vegeta wondered.

Nappa considered the question and explained that most Saiyan souls had already been cleaned and reborn. "Of course, some of us Saiyans had some really dirty spirits. There's a few of us that will be in purgatory for a while." He grinned toothily. "The biggest thing keeping me there is that I'm not really sorry. I did some fucked up things, we all did. But I survived. And I'm still proud of that."

"Well, if that's the way you want it, then..." Vegeta muttered, and sat down on old stump in a way that reminded Nappa of the little boy whose hair he used to brush before lights out. (It was more like quickly rip his thick fingers through so the boy wouldn't get dreadlocks.) He smirked to himself, remembering how absolutely feral Vegeta had been as a child. He had previously been a well-mannered, slightly timid but also petulant prince in Saiyago. Hardly before 6 months had passed as a foot soldier in Frieza's forces he had become an absolute animal. Well-spoken for a 6 year old, but practically savage and insanely strong. Frieza was amused by the little terror he was creating. He used to call Vegeta into his formal dinners with investors and have him fight for everyone's entertainment. The guests would bring challengers to try the little brute. It was great fun, and they gambled large sums of money on the matches. Frieza won a decent chunk of change off the boy, and sometimes he'd throw Vegeta a couple bank notes. Being a kid, Vegeta didn't find this demeaning- in fact he loved it and thought he was quite special to be at the center of attention. Nappa let him enjoy it only because at least the kid would get a feast a few nights a month instead of his meager rations.

It didn't take long before Vegeta was stronger than both he and Raditz. He was only 12 or so when Frieza shuffled the boy along to some elite caretaker for proper training and grooming. It took Vegeta a long time to realize what Frieza had done to him. But, fuck, once he did …

Nappa looked at Vegeta as he was now. Still young, but not youthful. Constant revenge fantasies really age a guy, he thought.

"Listen, Vegeta, I'm not mad at you."

Vegeta uncrossed his arms and fixed him with a suspicious look. "How?"

Nappa shrugged. It was one of the first lessons of his rehabilitation in spirit world. Acknowledge other beings and empathize with them. Be humble. Forgive. He would get some brownie points for this; he was really aiming for a better lot in the next life.

"Because I understand. We had that one shot. Hell, I know the both of us thought we were going to die, hatching that suicide mission. I even thought about bailin' on you on Arlia. But it was actually real. The dragon balls. The Legendary. You were right. After so many years, the universe finally opened a door… just a crack. It gave you an opportunity to take down one of the most punch-able people in the history of everything." Nappa scratched the back of his head and then crossed his arms. "You had the first real opportunity to end it, and like the warrior you are, you trimmed the fat and executed the plan. I couldn't keep up. It wasn't personal. If I were you, I'd have done the same thing." He shrugged, then screwed up his face. "You didn't have to fake me out like that though, offer me your hand like you were going to help me, just to embarrass me. That was messed up. Kinda pissed me off. But at the same time … I'm not mad. More honorable it was you over some brown-noser of Frieza's. The fact that you even feel bad sort of surprises me." Maybe there's hope for your poor, twisted little soul after all.

Vegeta curled his lip. "Chsh. I don't feel bad, I'm merely compensating you for something I owe you. But if you won't have it, that's your harebrained decision to make." He muttered to himself about leading a horse to water.

"I appreciate it, your highness." A muscle in Vegeta's jaw jumped. He hadn't been called by an honorific in a long time. His knee jerk reaction was that he was being mocked, but Nappa only stared at him straight-faced and honest. "Really. That was the end for me. For the most part, it was a great pride to serve you. You did it, you took him down, you survived."

Vegeta glared out into the horizon through the drizzle. "Not exactly."

Nappa waved him off. "Aw, you were dead for like, a few hours! You chose life. Many people have you to thank for their freedom."

"Well, technically, it wasn't me." The younger said, toeing rocks with the tip of his boot.

Nappa sucked his teeth. "Oh, so what? That Kakarot kid came out of left field. The plan was yours, the objective is still complete. You think that kid would have ever gotten there without you as a catalyst? Besides, you'll catch him. Vegeta, it will all be right in the end. If it ain't right, it ain't over."

Vegeta nodded. He then stood, closed the short gap between them, and held out his hand. Nappa grabbed it and shook it once, firmly. Vegeta looked him in the eyes, not yet ready to let go. "I'm sorry." His lips barely moved, and Nappa was left unsure if the former prince had actually apologized or Nappa had somehow understood it telepathically. The effect was the same.

Nappa sniffed, cleared his throat. Here goes another tick on the to-do list for his soul's rehabilitation. "I forgive you." He said with a haughty little smile. Then, he cupped his mouth and shouted at the sky. "You hear that, Yemma? I forgive him!"

Vegeta snorted humorously and stepped back, folding his arms again. Solemnly, he glowered out over the sea scape and waited for Nappa to leave. The rain had turned into a slight mist.

"Who's the bimbo that followed you here?" Nappa wondered suddenly.

Vegeta followed the other's gaze to the parking lot down towards the tree line where a light blue hover craft sat idling, the obvious bold, black logo read "CC". Vegeta sneered.

Nappa gave his petit counterpart a once over, a smirk spreading across his face. "I don't remember her in the mix. You making new little human friends, my lord?"

Now that time, it was mockery. "Shut up."

Nappa sniffed the air in an exaggerated manner, "Well… can't see her too well from here, but she smells like a fine woman."

Vegeta felt his ears grow hot in embarrassment. "Goodbye, Nappa."

Nappa rolled his eyes, amazed he still had to remind the man to lighten up after so many years. "Just get it out of your system, Vegeta."

Vegeta thought about sucker punching the giant ape of a man for old times' sake. "She's afraid I took the dragon balls for some other purpose, she's not propositioning me. She's… monitoring me. Every where I turn, there she is. It's agitating."

Nappa sported a teasing grin. "She saw your wish 20 minutes ago, seems like she's waiting to give you a ride home. You can return the favor by giving her a ride at home." When Vegeta didn't seem interested, Nappa gave him a look of pseudo-concern. "Do you need me to ask her for you?"

Pinching the bridge of his nose, Vegeta feigned a headache.

"Oh, man." Nappa grunted, reaching down to readjust himself between the legs. "Haven't had a body in a while, kinda forgot about the old in-and-out. Hey, maybe you should wish for me to have an extra 30 minutes so I could go get this banana peeled before I go back. What do you say?"

Vegeta chucked a rock at the buffoon, who dodged quite gracefully for his size. Cackling, Nappa levitated a length away and dry-humped the air until he disappeared back to the spirit realm. "God, 2 years without you and 30 minutes is still intolerable."

He must have stared at the spot where the man disappeared for longer then he'd meant to. The sound of gravel crunching behind him snapped him out of the reverie. He then realized that the rain had stopped and the sun was peeking through the cloud cover. Bulma was standing next to him.

"Uh, Hello?" She said after he refused to acknowledge her. "What gives? You stole my dragon radar to catch up with your old pal Big Show?"

She had meant it to be a flirty little jab, but Vegeta turned towards her with a look of barely contained contempt. He dug in his pants pocket and shoved the radar in her hands. Unsure of herself around Prince of all violent mood swings, Bulma fidgeted for a moment before venturing:

"That was kinda sweet, what you did. You wanna ride home?"

Out of the corner of his eye, he caught a glimpse of her cleavage in her short summer dress. She was wearing a red bikini underneath. Just get it out of your system! He heard Nappa's gregarious voice in his head, and saw him thrusting his hips in his mind's eye. Sickening imagery aside, Vegeta considered her offer and simply grunted in response as he turned down the gravel path. It seemed to please her, and she blathered all the way down the rocky trail to the vehicle.

"You freaked me out a little," She was saying. "You know, you can totally use the dragonballs for nice stuff like that, but you have to let me know first. I almost called Goku to come knock you out."

At the hood of her car, Vegeta gave her a vicious look. She paused mid-stride, looking startled by his expression. There was hardly any time to react as he lifted his fist and blasted through the hood of her car, totaling the engine and mangling the metal frame.

She stood open mouthed, beach wind blowing strands of her hair in her face that stuck to her lips. Finally, she found her voice. "WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU?!"

Vegeta smiled at her cruelly. "Stop following me around, woman." He lifted off the ground. "And good luck getting home."