Interlude: Don't judge a man by his kimono, judge him by the flowers in his hair

Alma Karma has spent a full month in "her village", coming to terms with the truth behind her brother's absence after the war and his death at Shinsengumi's hands. When she returned to the Shinsengumi headquarters, looking quite paler than her colleagues and superiors would have expected, but with "a spark in her eyes", as Kondo has fondly said, the commander of Shinsengumi decided to invite her, Okita and Hijikata out. Alma wasn't sure how she has managed to become one of the people Kondo considered the closest, but she wasn't going to complain: it made her job of spying easier.

It also made her feel rotten to the core, when Kondo laughed and fondly called her his little sister and when Hijikata and Okita only smirked in reply. However, she has made her mind up a while ago and the month she has spent getting to know Katsura as she tended to his injuries and kept him company in the safe house has only strengthened her resolution. It also reassured her that, as long as she managed to keep them from outright confrontation, nobody would get hurt. Because he infamous, feared terrorist didn't want to hurt anybody.

She came "back to Edo" on a Wednesday. She took time that day to visit Odd Jobs, fearful for a moment, when she saw Mutsu and Sakamoto sitting on Gintoki's sofa. However, it quickly became apparent that the Yato hasn't told anybody about Alma's healing abilities. She was glad to see Gintoki and Kagura going well and they pretended to not care to hear that so was Katsura and the afternoon passed in a pleasant atmosphere. Afterwards, she has spent the evening putting her tiny flat in order and the whole of Thursday and Friday getting used to being a police officer again.

Friday evening found her walking down the streets of Kabuki-cho, together with an enthusiastic commander, a bored first captain and a vice-commander growing steadily more annoyed. They were dressed in civilian clothes and Alma took the opportunity to wear the kimono she has gotten on the occasion of the hanami, months ago. She was thinking that the evening could very well be interesting and amusing. Neon signs invited them to visit various clubs and bars, but Kondo ignored them all, walking energetically and speaking cheerfully.

'It's a bit particular, but the atmosphere is more relaxed than in the other clubs,' he told them at some point. Alma made sure that she looked politely interested, not comfortable enough to roll her eyes like Okita was doing.

'We're not going to that place where Tae Shimura works?' Hijikata asked with unmasked surprise. Kondo laughed awkwardly, scratching the back of his head as he admitted having been banned a while ago. He tried to play it down, but everybody in the Shinsengumi knew about the unrequited love he had for the club hostess and the reason for the ban was obvious.

'So you had to find a new place?' Okita asked mockingly. Kondo's awkward laughter continued for a while, but the man said nothing. 'I see,' Okita said flatly. Alma looked at him, not at all understanding what it was that he saw.

'What?' she asked outright.

'He's been sneaking in anyway, stalking the woman. He just can't do it with us around,' Okita explained in the same, flat tone. It was impossible to judge whether he approved or not, but Alma knew by then about his unconditional loyalty towards Kondo. Even if he didn't approve, he wouldn't do anything about it. 'What surprises me the most is that you even tried another place, commander,' the first captain added, with just a hint of curiosity in his tone. Alma glanced as Kondo as well, to gauge his reaction.

'It's actually one of the places Toshi's informant gave us as Katsura's possible hiding places and I've been the one to check it out originally. Katsura never showed up there, but the people are nice, so I visited a few times afterwards,' the commander admitted sheepishly. Okita blinked in surprise. Alma shivered as a feeling of foreboding hit her.

'Have you been hanging out in a terrorist den?' Hijikata yelled. A few passers-by glanced at them with disapproval.

'Don't be rude, Toshi, it's not a terrorist den,' Kondo admonished, stopping in front of the neon-decorated door. Alma looked up at the name and her eyes widened as she realized where they were.

Kamakko Club has indeed been on Daiki's list of places to check and not once Alma has wondered what exactly Katsura was supposed to be doing there. And how the hell he would have gotten the idea in the first place. She wasn't the only one in the force, but she understood, due to the improbability of the place, that Daiki's information must have been true. A man making up lies would choose something more believable and the club employing drag queens as hostesses.

'Shall we go in?' Kondo asked. Alma knew that she had about five seconds to come up with an excuse as to why she didn't want to go, but she couldn't come up with anything that would not insult either the commander or the men working in the club.

'You've gotta be kidding me,' Hijikata muttered, but threw the butt of his cigarette into appropriate trash and followed Kondo inside without hesitation. Okita and Alma exchanged glances and went in as well.

'Give it a chance, Toshi. I'm sure you'll enjoy your time and the hostesses are the most polite and friendly here,' Kondo insisted. Hijikata muttered something that could very well be: "that is not a good thing". Okita and Alma exchanged glances again and snorted in laughter at the mental image of the demonic vice-commander surrounded by fawning drag queens. Hijikata scorched them with a glare.

'Welcome in Kamakko, valued custom-' the vaguely familiar voice started and stopped abruptly when they turned to face the hostess welcoming them.

He was dressed in a nice, pink kimono with a cherry blossom pattern, his impeccable make-up doing a great job of distracting from the familiar features and red, dead-fish eyes. Only they were not quite dead, but wide open in shock and if it wasn't for the unmistakable, silvery, curly hair, Alma would have seen sure she was imagining things. But she wasn't. Probably in her brain's response to cope with the astonishing revelation, she found herself wondering how he made the fake ponytails look so realistic and how they were attached to his hair.

'This wasn't part of the deal,' said Gintoki Sakata blandly. The White Demon was dressed in drag, Alma thought numbly as he turned around to leave. He barely had the time to do so when an admonishing exclamation of "Paako" froze him in place.

'You never learn, Paako,' said the same voice, but softer and fonder and Alma found herself staring wide-eyed, at a huge man whose two-day stubble completely ruined his attempts of looking like a woman. Well, truthfully it was just the first on the long list of things that ruined the monster's attempts at feminine appearance. 'Welcome back, Isao. You brought some friends this time?' he spoke with a bright smile, "Paako" still frozen next to him with an unhappy grimace.

'Madamoiselle Saigou,' Kondo replied jovially, while Alma, Hijikata and Okita shared a horrified look: did he just say "Isao"? A drag queen was calling the commander of the Shinsengumi by his given name? 'Allow me to introduce you to Toshi, Sougo and Alma.'

They went through the introduction mechanically. It felt like some sort of surreal dream, especially when the kimono-clad White Demon told them his name was "Paako".

'I think I never met Paako before, have you been hiding her, Madamoiselle?' Kondo asked, smiling in a friendly way at the cross-dressing white-head, whose facial muscles twitched minutely when he was referred to as "her". The huge man, who really looked nothing like a "mademoiselle", put a hand around "Paako's" shoulders and explained that she was just temporarily helping sometimes. Then he looked at Gintoki seriously.

'Please be polite to Isao and his friends, Paako,' he said. 'Isao is a very kind man and he deserves the best service. Besides, you're not going to abandon Zurako, are you? Her hand is still hurting so she needs your help,' he added. Gintoki's face twitched momentarily again and then he grumbled something, but Alma found herself distracted from the exchange.

Zura... ko?

A person called "Zurako" with a hurt hand, Alma thought. Suddenly, she got a very bad feeling about the visit in the Kamakko Club. It only intensified when Paako resolutely did not look her direction at all, smiling a fake and saccharine smile at Kondo, opening his mouth to say something that never got said, because Saigou cut him, announcing that he would also join the table.

'Oi, if you're going I don't need to be there,' Paako said immediately, dropping the fake tone and the slightly high-pitched voice he was using until now. Okita, Hijikata and Kondo blinked at him in surprise and Alma was sure they must have recognized him then.

'Don't be silly, Paako, we have four guests, so we will be four hostesses,' Saigou countered before anybody could say anything more. He pushed Paako closer to Hijikata, himself hooking his arm around Kondo's. 'Ayumi, Zurako,' he called out sweetly, turning his head away. Okita made a face like he was gagging and Paako turned to him.

'Don't to that, trust me,' he said seriously in a quiet voice. He was about to add something more when a new voice, speaking in an overly sweet and fake high-pitched tone announced the arrival of another drag queen.

'Oh my god, you're so cute,' exclaimed a man with a long chin and short, red hair, coming up to them. Alma vaguely realized that he was targeting Okita, but she didn't hear the first captain's reaction, because her eyes fell on the fourth hostess that was supposed to entertain the Shinsengumi and she felt as though her world tilted and it took all she had to remain standing.

It had to be a bad dream, she thought vaguely, taking in the deep violet kimono, patterned with maple leaves, hands hidden in the sleeves of the kimono, the flawless make-up and the long, black hair gathered together just a few centimetres above the ends, thrown seemingly carelessly over the man's right shoulder. It had to be a very bad dream, she thought, eyes meeting the deep, warm, brown gaze that seemed as calm and reassured as Alma was not. When he looked towards the rest of the group, she followed his gaze and became aware of the commotion that has captured the attention of everybody else.

'I told you that I'm old enough to be here,' Okita lied through gritted teeth, stepping away from the red-haired man, who was very obviously fawning over him. 'Stop calling me cute,' he added, making the red-head and Saigou laugh.

'He's so shy,' the latter gushed. Alma saw Okita reach for his katana, which his still had despite being off duty and in civilian clothes. Kondo saw it as well and a heavy hand fell on Okita's shoulders as his commander laughed good-humouredly and said that Okita wasn't used to places like that yet.

'Commander, it's scary that you are,' Hijikata deadpanned. 'Can we go to Snack Smile now, please?' he asked.

'Please go,' said Paako, but Kondo reminded them that they couldn't, although he didn't elaborate on the reasons in front of Saigou and the others. 'Go somewhere else and die,' Paako countered immediately, sounding awfully serious. Hijikata glared at him.

'Oi, you remind me too much of that Odd Jobs idiot,' he growled. Paako, the female version of the "Odd Jobs idiot" twitched. 'I don't want to spend time with that attitude if I don't have to. If we're staying here I want a different hostess,' he added. And he looked straight at Katsura, eyes widening. And of course Okita and Kondo followed his gaze. It was just a matter of time that things went to hell, because surely at least one of them would recognize the man they spent their days chasing.

'Hello miss, have we met before?' Kondo asked after a moment of silence, frowning slightly. 'You look somewhat familiar,' he added. In a flash of premonition Alma saw how the situation would evolve and did the only thing she could think of to change the focus of everybody. She pretended to faint. In any case, she was so stressed she almost felt dizzy, so she barely had to fake the small stumble, knees giving out.

For a moment she thought it was reckless and that falling to the floor would hurt, that she would not be able to play the part of fainting. Then a strong arm caught her and when she looked up it was straight into Katsura's brown eyes, so very close to her. For a split of a second she forgot to breathe, only vaguely aware of the shouting going on around her. Something about air and roof filtered through to her brain and she let herself be taken away by Zurako.

Not exactly as planned, Alma thought, but not bad either.

})i({

'Oi, why did she have to go? Why couldn't that bastard go?' Hijikata protested, pointing his finger at Gintoki, after Katsura and Karma disappeared from the main room. Gintoki would have been insulted if he wasn't too busy staring at the demonic vice-commander. "She"? Where the hell did he think he was? The only woman around was Karma! He wanted to point it out, but for obvious reasons it was counter-productive.

'Now, now, Toshi,' Kondo started soothingly. 'Paako will be hurt if you continue talking like that, you should always remember your manners,' he was admonishing softly. Gintoki didn't bother to tell him that he couldn't care less what stupid tax robbers thought about him and anyway, this whole thing was ridiculous. He would be more insulted if Hijikata considered him a preferable choice and he wasn't ever going to try to be a nice hostess, so to hell with it. Admittedly, a part of it, he didn't say because Saigou was there and he had no desire to be forced to work in the club for free again. It was bad enough to be asked as Odd Jobs to give a helping hand.

'Should have grabbed the fainting princess first and make your get-away,' he said instead, smug even though it wasn't he who has escaped. It was enough that it wasn't Hijikata, who looked distinctly uncomfortable with the place. And anyway, he hasn't suggested Zura should go with Karma for nothing. It would be bothersome to have the police discover Zura's probably best disguise, and even more so to see Gintoki in Katsura's company yet again.

Hijikata shot Gintoki a venomous look. Just to show how much it affected him, Gintoki wanted to pick his nose, but he knew Saigou would slap his hand away and it was humiliating, especially together with the lecture about how a polite woman should behave. He was not a polite woman, damn it, not even a woman at all! But he settled on a mocking smirk in any case.

'But you were right, commander, she looked vaguely familiar,' Okita commented. It took Gintoki a moment to realize he was still talking about Zurako and he decided he was never going to let Zura live it down that the Shinsengumi referred to him by "she". Kondo made a thoughtful sound and Gintoki decided it was a high time to change the topic. Nothing good could come from discussing Zurako, perhaps except for material for Gintoki to mock Zura, but he already had more than enough of that. Plus, he already got more than enough: catching his fainting princess was bound to make Zura blush for at least three days once Gintoki put it in the correct light for him.

'Where the hell have you been going to see people like that?' Hijikata growled, glaring at Okita. It was clear from his tone that he didn't approve of cross-dressing and Gintoki smirked, seeing Saigou straighten. He secretly held his fingers crossed when Okita looked at Hijikata and asked what the vice-commander's problem was.

'A Shinsengumi officer should have no knowledge of such depravity and unseemliness, no familiarity with this kind of unnatural behaviour,' Hijikata replied hotly, unknowingly digging his own grave.

'Toshi,' Kondo admonished his second in command.

'Who are you calling an unnatural monster?' Saigou asked at the same time, his a booming voice silencing all the conversations in the club. Hijikata flinched, eyes widening as he realized the mistake he has made. Then again, Gintoki thought, he hasn't yet realized the extent of the punishment. He would cackle with glee if he didn't think it was absolutely necessary to not bring any attention to himself.

})i({

'You know,' Alma started out of the blue. Katsura looked at her, listening. 'When my- When Hijikata's informant gave us the list of places to look for you, nobody wanted to believe you had anything whatsoever to do with Kamakko Club,' she trailed off. Katsura looked away, towards the neon-lit Kabuki-cho he could see from the club building's roof. He used to think it disgusting, crawling with alien influence, swarming with things and creatures that did not belong. But now he could barely remember how it should be otherwise.

'None of us could figure out how you could have gotten here in the first place or what you would be doing here,' Alma added with a small laugh. Katsura wondered: what was he doing there? Was the excuse of this being an excellent disguise and him being tired of staying locked up in the safe house enough?

'Are you disappointed, now that you know?' he asked quietly, wondering if he cared about her opinion in the first place. From the rustling of fabric, he could guess that she got up and sure enough, soon she joined him, leaning against the railing, looking out at the city in silence.

'You're very convincing,' she muttered after a moment, instead of answering. Katsura shrugged.

'It's a good disguise, although only if I put some effort into it. It wasn't originally my idea, in case you were wondering, but I'm not going to ignore any means to my goal, even if people find it awkward or weird,' he pointed out. She hummed in agreement. He glanced her way before looking back at the neon-lit city. 'You look pretty in this kimono,' he added, changing the topic. With the corner of his eye, he saw her blush and then smile mischievously.

'You look pretty in yours as well,' she said. He looked at her and they laughed. Katsura thought, not for the first time, that he liked her laugh. When she was staying in the safe house, he found himself saying silly things on purpose, to make her laugh. It wasn't like him at all, he knew. It has gotten him a good number of weird glances from both Yoichi and Elizabeth, although neither of them said anything.

When their eyes locked again, hers were sparkling with joy and he found that he liked that as well. It was the most curious thing, because usually he looked people in the eyes to gauge their intentions or whether he could trust them, not for the pleasure of looking. Usually, when he got his answers, he looked away, rather than leaning closer, noting idly how alluring was the faint blush that coloured Alma's cheeks.

Her lips parted slightly, as though she wanted to say something, but only a breath escaped them. Her eyes flickered to his lips and then back to lock with his eyes, the invitation obvious even to him, but the implications of it suddenly scared him and he pulled back abruptly, blurting out the first thing that came to his mind: was there something on his face?

Alma didn't hide her disappointment and he wanted to apologize, feeling stupid. However, before anything else could be said, Katsura heard Saigou's voice calling for Zurako, sounding rather urgent. He allowed himself a brief moment to hope Paako hasn't done anything outrageous, before shouting back that he was coming. He glanced at Alma and she sighed heavily, straightening the non-existent creases on her kimono.

'The others are probably still there,' she muttered. Katsura nodded, understanding what she didn't say, hearing the unspoken plea: you should run.

'They haven't recognized me yet. They might not. If I was to run now they will start questioning it and will figure it out eventually,' he explained calmly. She pursed her lips and said nothing. 'Are you feeling better now? Would you like to stay up here?' he asked, even though he knew the answer she would give. He wasn't at all surprised when she said she'd join her comrades and they went downstairs together.

'How can I help you, Mademoiselle Saigou?' Katsura asked, frowning slightly when the club's owner came into view near the dressing room rather than the club itself. Gintoki couldn't have possibly gotten so drunk in such a short time that he needed to be removed from the club and required hauling to the Odd Jobs. Could he?

'Zurako, you're the best with make-up, can you help Mayo-chan?' Saigou asked with a very satisfied smile. Katsura repeated the name uncertainly, mentally going through the list of the hostesses in the club. He was pretty sure there was nobody by that name, but he could be wrong. He has been wrong when it came to names, as Agomi never ceased to point out. Saigou repeated the name with a firm nod and pulled a person out of the dressing room.

Katsura stared.

'Mayo... chan,' Alma repeated incredulously. The person glared at her furiously, as though daring her to say anything more. Katsura couldn't stop staring. The demonic vice-commander of the Shinsengumi, Toshirou Hijikata, because there was no doubt it was him, was wearing a pale yellow kimono with decorated with dark blue cranes and held closed by a matching, dark blue obi. Gone was the cigarette, the katana and even the messy, short hair. He was most surely wearing a wig, with sleek, long hair gathered into an elegant bun at the nape of his neck. There was a pale yellow flower tucked on top of the bun, completing the look of an elegant lady.

'Isn't she a beauty?' Saigou gushed. Hijikata twitched, eyes blazing, but very obviously didn't dare to say anything. In other circumstances, Katsura would be amused. 'She's just missing make-up and she can come to entertain some guests,' Saigou added. It occurred to Katsura that maybe he should have listened to Alma.

'Let's get it done and over with,' he muttered with a sigh. Hijikata glared at him and Katsura pretended to not notice, turning to Alma. 'If you're alright now, miss, I'm sure your friends in the club are worried about you,' he said in a formal tone. Saigou nodded and said he would take Alma back to the club and that Mayo-chan was to join them once she was ready. Katsura saw Hijikata bristle when referred to as "she" yet again, but he said nothing.

'But the vice-commander-' Alma started uncertainly.

'Is in very capable hands,' Saigou interrupted her firmly, already leading Alma away and there was no way the woman could resist Saigou. Except Katsura wasn't sure, remembering Alma in the castle and how she has faced Kamui. He shook his head and looked back at Hijikata, unsurprised to see the man glaring at him. It occurred to Katsura that a proper terrorist would take this opportunity to kill the vice-commander and make a run for it. He could imagine Takasugi mocking him, because he had no desire to do that.

'Come on then, Mayo-chan,' he said tiredly, the nickname barely passing his throat. 'It's pointless to run, if that is your idea. Mademoiselle Saigou is very resourceful when it comes to finding run-aways,' he added. Something flashed in Hijikata's eyes and Katsura realized he has forgotten to speak with a high-pitched voice.

'Is that so, Zurako?' the Shinsengumi asked in a very deliberate tone. Katsura shivered when he pronounced his nickname, hesitating the tiniest bit before adding the last syllable, and hoped it didn't show. Turning his back on the Shinsengumi was incredibly difficult, but Zurako had no reason not to, and so Katsura led the way back to the dressing room. He heard Hijikata follow and had to force himself to appear relaxed, waiting for the inevitable attack.

'Do you have any colour preference?' he asked, forcing on a casual tone and turning to "Mayo-chan" once they were both in the changing room. Hijikata stared at him as though he has grown a second head and Katsura shrugged, going to pick the cosmetics up. All the time, he was listening, hoping to catch the movement behind him fast enough to evade the attack and make a run for it.

Nothing like that happened.

Wordlessly, he pointed to a seat and Hijikata plopped down with a dejected expression but without a single word of protest. Surprised despite everything, that the Shinsengumi was going to allow this to happen, Katsura took care to sit with his back straight, facing Hijikata. He put the cosmetics on a small table next to them. Instinctively, he moved to grab the sponge for spreading the foundation with his right hand and he winced when his fingers didn't quite move like he wanted them to.

Next time he would think twice, or maybe three times before trying to grab a katana with his hand, he thought. Feeling Hijikata's gaze on him, he cursed internally and used his left hand to bend the fingers of the right one correctly on the sponge. It was mildly painful, but once his fingers were in place, he could keep them there well enough.

'What happened to your hand?' Hijikata asked and his voice was anything but idle. Whatever hopes Katsura might have still entertained that the Shinsengumi vice-commander hasn't recognized him faded at that tone.

'A kitchen accident,' Katsura replied flatly. Then, because Hijikata didn't stop him and he would be damned rather than give up on pretending until the very end, he put some of the foundation on the sponge. 'Don't move your head,' he instructed and started brushing the sponge against Hijikata's face, leaving a layer of foundation behind. He wanted nothing more than rush through it carelessly, but he didn't like not doing things correctly. All the same, he worked as quickly as possible, avoiding looking directly into Hijikata's eyes, which were glaring into him with such intensity Katsura wondered how it was possible he didn't have two holes in his head yet.

'You must have been holding a knife in a curious manner to cut the underside of your fingers,' Hijikata noted, again in that deliberate manner. Ignoring the words, Katsura told him to close his mouth and applied the foundation to the bottom part of his face.

'You should shave more often, Mayo-chan, the stubble will show,' he said just to annoy the Shinsengumi.

'Not everybody can have such a girly face as you,' Hijikata shot back angrily and Katsura had to bite his tongue to not answer. He didn't know why the vice-commander was so subdued, although probably the threat of Saigou was a prominent reason, but it worked for him. Fighting would only worsen the situation, so Katsura turned to choose the eyeshadow rather than continuing the conversation.

He was tempted to use something outrageous or outright ugly, but he knew Saigou wouldn't appreciate and his life has just gotten much more complicated without angering the owner of the club. So he chose a sensible shade of brown, skilfully taking some on a long brush. And if he happened to choose the one with golden glitter- Well, Hijikata was the demonic vice-commander of the Shinsengumi and he wasn't looking, busy glaring holes into Katsura's head. And despite everything he said and believed in, Katsura wasn't above some measure of petty revenge.

The advantage of applying eyeshadow was that Hijikata had to close his eyes, which he did only very reluctantly. A thought that he should run crossed Katsura's head, but he knew that Hijikata would follow in no time. Instead, he could wait for a situation where he had a better head start.

'Your kitchen accident: when did it happen? Approximately a month ago?' Hijikata asked while Katsura was putting away the eyeshadow. Not replying was as good as an answer, but Katsura knew he was not good at outright lying. And anyway, Hijikata knew already. If he didn't bite his lip it was only because he didn't like the taste of the lipstick.

'I am going to arrest you,' Hijikata informed him flatly. Katsura wondered what made him wait so long. He hummed in acknowledgement, pretending to be fully preoccupied by the choice of lipstick colour. 'I'm sure Sougo has handcuffs.'

'I'm sure you'll make for a good front page photo in tomorrow's newspaper wearing this kimono,' he said, letting the corner of his lips twitch up slightly when Hijikata's eyes widened in realization and then narrowed in anger. The vice-commander opened his mouth and froze when the brush with the lipstick touched his lips. Katsura smirked. He was tempted to taunt Hijikata some more, but a samurai should not be cruel.

Plus, he was sure Gintoki would have procured a camera in the meantime, to immortalize Mayo-chan.

'I will be back,' Hijikata threatened when Katsura put away the lipstick.

'I will not be here,' Katsura countered serenely.

})i({

Kondo's and Okita's looks when Mayo-chan emerged from the back of the club were priceless and Gintoki prized himself for having the presence of mind to take a photo of them first. Of course, he has had a forewarning that they would be worthwhile, when Saigou has led back in a shell shocked Alma. Mayo-chan herself was an awfully graceless photo material and outright jumped Paako when the latter asked Okita if he wanted a photo with Mayo-chan. They have both lost their fake hair before they have been separated, but that was the least of their problems.

And of course Okita and Kondo took photos with both their comrade and the Odd Jobs' boss.

Author's note: This is called "interlude" because I was originally planning to write a second story. However, seeing the reception of this one, I will not. The only reason I posted this till the end is because I personally hate to realize that a story I like is unfinished. So in case there are people out there who enjoy this, I don't want them to be left hanging.