The fragrance of fresh baked bread and newly brewed coffee tickled my nose.

The soothing presence that this place exudes was one of the main reasons why I frequent this establishment. Ever since the service club had shut down, I searched for a place where I can waste time thinking about nonsensical matters.

You could say that this place was my sanctuary away from home.

And now my sanctuary has been breached.

"What."

My voice came out as hoarse.

The person in front of me just said something ridiculous. Something so illogical, that my brain was still trying to process and make sense of it.

"Hikigaya, be my boyfriend."

Completely aware that she had thrown out being reasonable out of the window, Hayama Hayami repeated the same words that ruined my peace of mind.

"Hayama, shut up for a moment."

I raised a hand to prevent her from doing any more damage to my sanity. As expected, I truly should have just ignored her request to meet up with her. Damn you past-me, all you ever do is bring trouble to me.

Deep breathe. Hold. Release.

I did the cycle several times and cleared my head. Let's go over through this again. Hayama Hayami, the queen of our school just said something. That something, when translated into an array of characters would be [b,e,m,y b,o,y,f,r,i,e,n,d]. A series of letters arranged in a manner that formed the sentence that meant she wanted me to be her boyfriend.

What…?

Well brain, what do you think she meant by that?

It sounds like she wants you to be her boyfriend.

No, that's not it.

There has to be some other meaning in her words. Think and recall everything that happened before she said that words that caused this confusion. Think. There has to be a reason why this girl would say something so illogical.

Let's go through the variable again.

Hayama said something about her wanting to stand up to her family.

Her family decided to test her.

She said she needs to learn about responsibility and stuff.

So she needed me as her boyfriend.

So brain, what do you think about this?

She wants you to be her boyfriend.

Hah? What kind of dumb reasoning is that? How can having a boyfriend teach her about her about responsibility? Does she think that it's like taking care of a pet? That by being in a relationship equals being responsible?

How dumb. Being in a relationship means that you'll only suffer extra stress from the problems of your partner. You won't become responsible and will only have headaches. The youth today thinks that the earlier you get into a relationship the better. I say that it's pure stupidity without substance.

Conclusion: don't get in a relationship until you can afford divorce.

But she still asked you to be her boyfriend.

Aaaaaah! Nothing is making sense! I can't think a good reason why this woman would say those words. I can't form anything that would prove that what she said was anything but a joke.

I scratched my hair in distress. Why are all girls unreasonable?

Fine I give up.

I made a defeated sigh and stared at the person responsible for the tangent I just went through. Even when she's in disguise, her pretty features still surfaced.

"You're surprisingly cute when you're trying to wrap your mind around something."

She's totally trying to get a rise out of me.

"No."

"Hm?"

"The answer is no."

She frowned as I delivered the answer I got by going through the numbers. Yep, whatever her request was, it's unreasonable. I have no obligation to fulfill it. In fact, I was only here to hear what she had to say. That means that I can totally ignore everything she said.

Nice work, me.

"I see."

That was her simple reply. I watched as Hayama took a sip of her coffee, brown and overflowing with sugar. She has good taste if anything. Her lips were pursed in not a pout, but something that you would do when your parents failed to buy a gift on your birthday. Unfortunately, if she was trying to make me feel guilty, it won't work. As I've said last chapter, Soubu would be having its finals in just a month and as a responsible son of the Hikigaya family, it's my duty to study and work hard to get good grades.

That just ruined the taste my coffee a little.

"If that's the case, then I won't force you to accept my request."

That's good. I know that Hayama and I really didn't get along ever since the cultural festival event, but we still act neutral around each other. I'm glad that she's not forcing the issue and make both of us miserable. Then again, I don't know her that well. Maybe I was judging her with bias.

"Still, I spent a lot of effort with my disguise and to get here. Let's talk a little before you leave."

Ah, so she's trying to appeal to me. I'm sorry, but despite seeing you in a disguise, I don't think I can spend my time around you. Gomenasai.

So I wanted to say, but I just released a sigh. If anything, I'll make sure you leave first. I won't allow you to chase me out of my sanctuary.

"Sure…"

Despite saying that she wanted to talk, Hayama allowed silence to envelop us. She was leaning in her wooden chair and looking around in fascination, as if taking in her surroundings for the first time. The theme of this place was a Victorian era place. So there wasn't a lot of furniture made from metal. Colorless paintings decorated the wall and flowers in vases were present in every table.

"It sure has been a hectic year huh."

Finally finished with her thoughts, Hayama started.

"Midterms, Yukino's request, student council election and now were almost at our finals. Things just keep happening after one another."

"Yeah…"

My thoughts traveled to the various events that transpired on out third year. Sure enough, it was enough to even run me ragged.

"Hikigaya, did you know that my clique barely talks to me anymore?"

Ah…

The most popular clique of Soubu made up of social butterflies had split up just as our second year ended. This impacted the student body in various ways and made me somewhat happy that the service club had disbanded. Because I was sure that we would be involved in one way or another.

"Yumiko has chosen sciences it was surprising that Yui joined her. Hina is still in our class but she doesn't bother to stay around anymore. Tobe remains the same but doesn't approach me anymore. Then there's Yamato and Ooka who confessed their feelings to me and hates me right now."

A lot of things sure happened on her side too. The last bit still had a few rumors floating around in the school. The status of Hayama's clique was already strained during that time when two of her clique members decided to confess to her at the same day.

It was needless to say that it was the final straw that broke the camel's back.

The group that she tried her best to protect for two years had finally reached the end of its life, resulting in her isolation from all of the members. The loss of her clique made way for more people to surround her, wanting to monopolize the queen of Soubu during the final months.

But all of it wasn't unsurprising.

"Tell me Hikigaya. Did you always know that it would happen?"

Because things built on false foundations will inevitably crumble.

"No. I didn't knew that it would happen. I just expected something to happen sooner or later."

Because something so fake couldn't last. No matter how much people try to cling to it.

It could've been a person outside her clique. Or an event that would press them to express their true feelings. Finally, it could be an internal disagreement that could end the existence of her group. The threshold that they can take has a limit. It was only a matter of time.

"Yeah… deep inside, I also expect it to happen."

Hayama sighed, her figure s little smaller than before.

"Tell me Hikigaya. What was the reason why it happened?"

I placed my cup on the wooden table and met her gaze.

"You already know the answer to that."

Her eyes hidden by contacts met mine, it was filled with desperation.

"Still… I would like you to tell me."

For the first time I wondered if I should've let after she accepted my refusal of her request. Well, there's no use regretting it now. Despite how much I disliked these kind of conversations, I won't hold back on the truth. That's just the kind of person I am.

"You. You're the reason why your group fell apart."

There was no other people to blame. Despite the popular opinion that it was Yamato and Ooka who destroyed their clique by confessing to her, in my mind, the only reason why everything had happened like that was because of her.

Because she's nothing but a fake. If Yuigahama was a nice girl, and Yukinoshita was a cruel mistress, then Hayama was a liar.

"Heh."

She chuckled, her shoulders shaking. There was an unsightly smile on her otherwise beautiful face. To me, that unsightly smile was leagues better than the one she wears all the time.

"Someone finally said it to me."

Droplets of tear fell from the corner of her eyes. The perfect girl persona broke and showed the miserable girl watching everything from beneath.

Ah shit, I made her cry.

Seeing that she wasn't even doing anything to stop her tears from falling on the wooden table, I withdrew a handkerchief from my pocket and offered it to her.

"Here use it, people would think I made you cry otherwise."

"But you did make me cry, Hikigaya."

"Ah, that's true isn't it? Well take it anyway, you look ridiculous."

"Hehe, what the heck, you're despicable."

Finally seeing my reason, Hayama took the white piece of cloths and wiped her eyes. I sighed and returned my hand to my side. This girl isn't cute at all.

"Hikigaya, have somebody ever told you that you can't talk to girls like that?"

"Maybe, but if they did, they would follow with insults so I probably forgot."

"So not only you have bad manners, but also a bad memory. Huh, my expectations from you are really dropping."

"Didn't your parents ever teach you not to harbor unreasonable expectations?"

"Did yours?"

"Well, no… I learned it from someone else."

It was clear that she was using banter to hide her embarrassment of crying in front of me. Since, I was not a jerk, I allowed her to throw around words. I will admit that the exchange of words reminded me of a time where it was the usual for me.

"Hikigaya tell me… If I had been more open… more honest with my feelings… if I had made a tiny compromise… do you think that would have been enough?"

After the crushing truth comes the fleeting sense of wondering. The many ifs that when placed on certain events, might have change the variables and thus the results. Hayama was wondering if the change of her view would make different.

Maybe it would… then again, maybe not.

"I can't answer that Hayama."

Because only you would know if your efforts could have changed anything.

"That's not very helpful."

"Hey, I'm just a loner. Some things are just beyond me."

She released a deep sigh and fell into silence. I have no idea what was running in her mind, but her expression was different from the usual perfect girl and the miserable girl from earlier. It was… fitting. I guess you could say that's this is just how she looked when she was not trying to placate everyone around her.

I can't imagine trying to meet everyone's expectations with a smile.

I have always allowed people to think what they want, whether it was good or bad. It was simply because I grew used to being in the lower spectrum. I don't care if they find me gross or completely ignore my presence. That kind of mindset allowed me to become a loner. Where other people would work to change people's opinion of them, I simply sat and did nothing.

I was tired. I'm tired of conforming to society. I'm tired of being what I don't like just so other people would talk to me with things I don't enjoy.

It was a flawed way of living. But at least I still had my pride.

Hayama on the other hand, did the opposite. She met every one's expectation by being as good as she can be. She honed her smile so that it would have no flaws. She made it so that everyone would love her.

But living such a life is painful.

Maybe that's why I didn't like her. Because why would anyone choose to live a life full of pain just for the sake of others? She wasn't even doing it for their benefit. She's just afraid of trusting people. Of letting them form their honest opinion of her real self.

That's why she's such a fake.

"You really are not cute…"

Hayama perked up from her position and stared at me with a questioning gaze. Ah I must have let it slip.

"You aren't exactly an eye candy either, Hikigaya."

Now she's thrown away her persona and was insulting me right in the face.

"But you still asked me to be your boyfriend."

"Guh!"

Hayama made an expression as if she was slapped and glared at me.

"Just how can you speak like that? Hikigaya, you… aren't you afraid of making people hate you?"

"Look who's talking. I'm pretty sure that you already know this, but I don't like you."

"Yeah but… hah, you're annoying."

Hayama slumped and ran her hands through her hair.

I looked at my phone and was surprised to see that almost two hours have passed since she arrived. It seems like she had made me unaware of the time.

Really, this girl is just too troublesome.

"By the way Hayama, I don't want to bring this up but I'm curious."

"What is it?"

"Just why did you bring that request to me?"

Hayama even without her perfect girl act was… well she had it all. She's good in sports and academics. She even came from a wealthy family. If she wanted to build a relationship, she could have done with a lot of choices.

So why did she even come to me?

"Oh, that's simple. It's because I like you, Hikigaya…"

Hayama answered so naturally it was as if I was asking about the time.

"You… what?"

As if her brain finally caught up on her words, her eyes widened her hands went to cover her mouth. Beneath my stare, her face turned red.

"I… ah…"

Just as she was searching for words, I was frozen in my spot, my brain working as if it was solving a complicated math question.

Maybe that's why she wants you to be her boyfriend?