Here are a few thoughts on Part 5 and on this story generally. I hope these ideas help to explain and deepen the story for you.

Ghosts of the Past had a number of inspirations. Gone with the Wind (the massive sweeping novel of the South and not the movie) was the largest influence for this fic. I wanted to write lovers who keep missing each other. And then when they finally get together, things fall apart. The love triangle with Hux-Rey-Kylo was motivated by Gone with the Wind as well. Plus, I had been dying to write some more Hux and Rey after Fulcrum.

As in Gone with the Wind, war is a huge part of this story. From the plot to the characterization, war is a recurring theme. War leaves its mark on people, on cultures, and on relationships. This story is partly about how hard it is for people to get along, whether it is in personal relationships (Rey and Kylo) or in the political sense (the First Order and the Resistance, the Dark and the Light). Our differences are real and they matter. And they can be depressingly hard to bridge. Pluralistic societies and functioning democracies are in many ways a triumph of compromise and tolerance. We should be grateful for them, even if they can be messy and frustrating. So too, we should be grateful for those people in our personal lives who are patient, flexible and understanding. They are often the people who keep families and relationships together.

The portrayal of the Sith family relationships in this story is inspired by the tv series Tyrant. Everyday life in the First Order compound is inspired by the alt-history TV series The Man in the High Castle. My husband and I binged on that show for about two weeks straight and it heavily influenced this story in lots of ways, especially in the character of Kylo Ren. Aspects of him are modeled off the American Nazi John Smith in that show.

I honestly never intended for this story to drag out so long. This story kept mushrooming in part because it was so easy and fun to write. I tire of some of my stories and after a while, they can become a chore to write (His Padawan, I'm looking at you!). But never this one. This fic was a blast to write. Originally, this story was supposed to end when Hux ran off with Rey. Rey was either going to live happily ever after with Hux at the Resistance or Kylo was going to arrive to rescue her and kill Luke Skywalker. Either way, we were going to end with a wedding. But that conclusion felt rushed and unsatisfactory, so I kept writing. I also felt like Kylo and Rey needed an opportunity to try and make things work.

When it came to Part 5, I began with the question: What would happen to Anakin and Padme if Padme had lived? Would she and Anakin have stayed together? Because that's really the scenario here. My answer is no, but they both would have tried. And that's how I hoped to depict Kylo and Rey in Part 5. Each in their own way truly tries and compromises to get along but it just doesn't work out. The wartime context exacerbates differences that in another setting perhaps they could mostly ignore. Their respective leadership roles also create flashpoints that would not exist for another couple. In the end, it falls apart fast and Kylo doesn't really see it coming. And with the loss of Rey, he loses the equal partner Empress he wants, his dream of a Dark-Light family dynasty in the Force, and his goal of balance. He rules the galaxy, but he rules it alone. History repeats itself, this time a little differently, but the result is the same.

In my mind, Kylo does truly love Rey. Just like I believe that Anakin truly loves Padme. Both men end up sacrificing their love quite accidentally on the way to Dark Side glory. If you had asked them to make this choice up front, neither would have done so. But unwittingly, that's how things turn out.

Rey the survivor, of course, survives. That's what she does.

The challenge of a Reylo fic is to find common ground between these two characters from widely divergent backgrounds and points of view. Because in real life, relationships grow and deepen from commonalities—similar values, goals and personalities. That's the struggle of romantic relationships—you need mental and physical chemistry and two lives that align (or one partner willing to compromise a lot). Other Reylo fics I have written start with the lovers screaming at each other and then they find their way to harmony. This fic starts with harmony and the lovers evolve to end up screaming at each other. I think this latter plot is the far more common example from real life. I'm old enough to have seen a few friends divorce and one get left at the altar. Every time, things started off great even if there were a few red flags visible (but only in retrospect). But as things got serious and commitments loomed, conflicts ripened. You can ignore your differences when it's all fun date nights and weekends away. But once you are trying to mesh two families (trust me, you marry your spouse, but you marry their family too in the end) or there are serious purchases or career and family decisions on the horizon, differing priorities and values can matter in a big way. I hoped to portray a bit of that complexity in this fic.

I wanted the Reylo relationship in this fic to be complicated. A mix and good and bad. Is Kylo the bad guy? He certainly is in the war context but less so vis-a-vis Rey. His motives toward her are pure even if he's overly aggressive about planning their life out and maneuvering Rey into bed. Still, Kylo sees a lot of the truth of Rey. Just not all of it. He has a big blind spot about the consequences of his own brutality and he doesn't recognize how meaningful that is for their relationship. And so he doesn't see the end coming. Have you ever gotten dumped and didn't see it coming? Have you ever failed to appreciate that your partner is unhappy because you have been caught up in your career or the kids or whatever? You think everything is fine because it's fine for you, but that's not really the case? Trust me, it happens all the time. Kylo is the romantic at heart and very committed to Rey. He's the type who hangs in there and tries to make things work. Time and again, he is the pursuer with Rey and he drives the relationship for the most part.

In some ways, Rey doesn't appreciate that the end is coming either. She's been confusing her problems with Kylo with her problems with his war. Have you ever been in a bad relationship you kept telling yourself wasn't so bad and would get better? Relationships do ebb and flow and anyone who has been married for a few years will know that rough patches are reality and that true conflicts come up time and again. So the concept of working through a problem or just hanging in there until it's over is often (but not always) the solution. Determining when a conflict is insurmountable and also whether is fundamental to the relationship can be hard. Because some differences can be managed or even ignored, while others cannot be. And the breaking point for one person is not necessarily the same for another.

All of this is especially hard for Rey who has no background of relationships to give her guidance and confidence in her choices. Can you have a happy marriage if you've never seen one? Can you have a healthy relationship if you grew up in isolation? I think the answers are yes, but I also think that it would require lots of time and patience. Kylo ruins things in a large part by rushing Rey and creating external timelines that are an outgrowth of his war and not the natural evolution of their love. Plus, life with Kylo comes with a lot of strings attached. Being Empress isn't actually an easy job nor is it something every woman would want. Being thrust into that sort of public and political role is a big deal, particularly for someone with Rey's background and insecurities, and for someone who hasn't signed on as a true believer of the First Order. It just adds to the pressure Kylo creates. Light Side Rey also turns out to be the character most motivated by fear and insecurities in this fic, and not our Dark Sith.

I have the sense that these two lovers might be completely happy were things allowed to develop more slowly and were the external pressures of war and position removed. But, of course, that's not the case. They are the Romeo and Juliette of the galaxy in some respects, doomed by the context of their love and by their differences in background.

If you've read my other stories, you know that I do not water down my Sith. Not their violence, their aggression, their sense of entitlement nor their ambition. Kylo does and says things our modern, conventionally moral world would not approve of. But I wanted Kylo to have heroic qualities and sympathetic moments. In the end, I wanted readers to be rooting for our Reylo lovers to make it even as it becomes clear that they will not.

When it all falls apart, Kylo is the blindsided partner like Padme is in Episode 3. (He has some of her lines too.) All the signs of trouble brewing have been there but who knew that Anakin/Rey would react so abruptly and decisively? In hindsight, the path is clear but in real time it is not. In my story, Rey's decision and her reticence about commitment have been building all along but Kylo doesn't recognize it until it's too late. Rey is feeling increasingly trapped and I think she would never tolerate that. I can absolutely see her lighting a sword prepared to fight her way out, if necessary. However, I don't see her ever intentionally harming Kylo. That's why when she does hurt him, it is an accident and an outgrowth of the Jakku girl's aggressive self-defense. Rey can be tough and confrontational because Jakku made her so and not because she's a hard ass by nature. But when push comes to shove, Jakku always explains how Rey reacts. We all default first to what we know best.

For Kylo, this is the last straw. Kylo gives way more emotional commitment to their relationship and in some ways he sustains their emotional connection (because Jakku, of course). He feels utterly betrayed and rejected. And so, Sith that he is, Kylo reacts by trying to kill her. From his perspective, he feels pushed into this. This is the latest (and biggest) of her on-and-off-again rejections and he's at a breaking point. In an ordinary relationship, this is when you go your separate ways. When you recognize that the relationship is toxic and your partner can't/won't change or can't/won't give you all you need. Except, of course, if you are a vengeful Sith who's worried about a potential enemy girlfriend.

I have written a lot of Reylo and each time the characters and situations are slightly different. This is the first time that I wrote Kylo modeled intentionally off Anakin Skywalker. This Kylo is far more like his ill-fated grandfather in temperament and motivations than any other version of Kylo that I have written.

My boys and I finally watched the Clone Wars cartoon series (a lot of it went right past the four-year-old) and that series' characterization of Anakin stuck with me. He's committed and brave, a great mix of pragmatism and idealism, a little commanding but also understanding too. I very much wanted Kylo Ren in this fic to believe that he is the hero and his actions are justified, just like his grandfather did. In the end, I wanted Kylo to feel victimized for how things have turned out. Rey ultimately hurts our anti-hero Sith deeply. He ends up bitter but fighting it. Darker but still craving the Light.

The title Ghosts of the Past is intended to capture the struggle of my main characters. Kylo begins the story trying hard to avoid the strategic mistakes of the prior Empire and we learn as the story continues how much he wants to avoid the personal mistakes of his own family. As much as Kylo wants to recreate his grandfather's beloved Empire, he wants to do it differently. And though he wants to emulate his grandfather's glory, he wants to live a happier life. When the story ends, neither goal has really come true for Kylo. For as much as he reveres the past and wants to fix it, he ends up reliving it in key ways. Rey too wants to supersede her personal past and she too never quite gets there. I suspect that it will take Rey finding her way on her own terms for her to get past the hurts to Jakku.

The influence of the past is a recurring theme in this story and it is woven all through the many characters and their backstories. Even literally, there are ghosts of the past haunting our main characters. For Rey, it is the ghostly Lady Plagueis in the Sith temple holding the Dark secret to immortality. Snoke's dead wife, like the portrait of Lady Vader, serves as a terrifying role model for survivor Rey. These women are everything Rey fears to become. The irony is that Rey worries about being marked for death as Kylo's girl, but refusing to be Kylo's girl is actually what endangers her most.

For Kylo, he hears the ghostly words of Snoke speaking of Rey. Kylo thinks he is hearing Snoke's dying words but in fact Snoke is speaking in the Force in present tense, only Kylo doesn't know it because he doesn't know that Rey in fact lives. And that's sort of the theme of my story in a nutshell right there: what Kylo understands to be the past is in fact his present. That awful misconception depicted in the last paragraphs of this fic is the crux of the story.

I want to thank my readers who made it all the way through this fic. I meandered here and there and spent more time than usual on character development and atmospherics in this fic. That was probably a bit self-indulgent, but I confess that I love the SW universe. I also love complicated and complex conflicts and characters. Maybe it's because I feel like I myself get constantly misjudged in real life, but it's true that we are all more than we seem. The world too often wants to put us into boxes and categories and if you challenge that too much you can be judged very harshly. I myself am very quietly subversive about these things. Because sometimes upending people's expectations is the best revenge. Own who you are and be proud of it, but don't be afraid of change. And recognize helpful, constructive criticism for what it is.

Yes, there is a Part 6, at least in my head. It takes place after a significant time gap when our lovers' paths cross again. He's been ruling an empire and struggling with Darkness. She has been pursuing her dream of a normal life. It's a 'second chance at love' story and it's all in my head. I suppose it will get written eventually. It was supposed to be an epilogue but it's way too much so I jettisoned that idea.

Thanks again for reading. I hope you enjoyed it.