This is based on a post by e-wills on tumblr, where she discussed how the other riders would respond to losing a limb. I liked the idea a lot, and decided to write an AU where Astrid lost her leg as well. I hope you like it!
Hiccup winced as he took another step with the prosthetic leg. Still a dozen steps to go until he reached the bottom of the stairs of the Great Hall. It had been weeks since the battle, so why did it still hurt so much? A broken limb would have healed by now, and his leg certainly looked healed. Well, if you ignored the fact that about one third was missing, it looked healed.
He gently took another step, swearing softly when a blast of pain raced up from his… stump. Short distances weren't so bad. It would barely hurt. Just the constant ache he always felt. But after a long day of walking and running, or at least attempting to run without stumbling and falling, it felt like his leg was on fire. It made him almost wish for winter to arrive already, just so he could scoop up some snow to cool down the flame that wasn't there.
"Hiccup!" A voice called from behind him, and he swung around, immediately regretting his decision when he lost his balance on the narrow steps.
"Hey Astrid!" he said as he swung his arms around, trying desperately not to fall in front of his… Crush? Girlfriend? He honestly wasn't quite sure. She ran down the steps and grabbed his hand to steady him, and he sighed in relief.
"Thanks. H-How are you today?" he said when he caught his breath, cursing himself for stuttering.
"It's been fine. People keep bothering me, asking if I'm okay, I hate that. Like, why wouldn't I be okay?!" Astrid said loudly as she grabbed his arm to steady him when he took another step.
Hiccup desperately tried to keep his eyes on his own feet, or foot, and not glance at the reason people were worried about Astrid. It was hard, as it was right there.
The peg leg sticking out from under her skirt. The brown oak that was her new right leg was a stark contrast to the gray iron of his left leg.
"Yeah, you're doing great! I, uh, I wish I was doing as well as you," he said, blushing. She giggled as she helped him down the stairs, and he wondered if she thought he was weak. How couldn't she? They had suffered the same injury, yet she was dealing with it much better than he was. She was already running around, training, fighting, all without breaking a sweat. While he could barely walk down some stairs without wanting to lie down because of the pain.
Sure, she wasn't as graceful as she used to be. With her knee gone, she was forced to move a bit odd in order to not have the peg leg scrape on the ground, and she was clearly still getting used to the balance.
But she didn't look like she was struggling. Hiccup couldn't even imagine having to help her down the stairs, even though she lost a bigger part of her leg than he did.
"You will! I had more time to train, remember? You slept a month away, so of course you're not quite as agile! Besides, you're still way better on Toothless than I am on Stormfly," Astrid said as they reached the bottom of the stairs, and Hiccup tried not to let the pain show.
He knew she was right. She hadn't spent a month in a coma. She had stayed conscious, biting through the pain and refusing to give in. She had fought and won.
But Hiccup couldn't help feeling a tinge of jealousy. Before he had met Toothless, Astrid was everything he wanted to be. He wanted to be strong like her, stoic like her, agile like her. And even though befriending Toothless and defeating the Red Death had given him a new, almost heroic status in the village, she was still the better Viking.
"Thanks. I, uh, I guess you're right," he said, unsure of what else to say. Even though he didn't need to look down to walk on flat surfaces, he didn't lift his eyes from his feet. It had only been two weeks since she kissed him, and they hadn't had many chances to talk since then. Should he give her a kiss? Ask her if he could kiss her? Give her a compliment? Were they girlfriend and boyfriend now? Or had it been just a one time thing?
Astrid suddenly moved in front of him, before bending down so her face was in his line of sight. Then, she rose again, and he couldn't help but let his face be drawn up with her.
"Hiccup, you're thinking too much, I can see it! How about you come and train with me for a bit? I'm gonna do some axe throwing in the forest," she asked, keeping her gaze fixed on his, and he couldn't look away. He nearly snorted when he realized she was already doing her old training routine.
Of course she was. He wasn't even really surprised. Astrid couldn't let anyone else overtake her at anything, least of all physical activity.
He wasn't sure if it would be a good idea to join her. He would like to spend more time with her, but his leg felt like it was burning off, and he wanted nothing more than to get a block of ice from his cellar and put it on the stump. Plus, he'd just embarrass herself. She'd run and jump through the forest, while he'd trip over roots and drop the heavy axe.
Like she dropped her axe that day.
The thought came without warning, and his eyes flashed down again, to her wooden leg where her axe had fallen.
"I don't, no, I mean I, uh, I…" he stuttered as he forced his eyes up again and stared over her shoulder, hoping she hadn't noticed.
Of course she had. And now she probably thought he doubted her axe throwing abilities or thought she was weak or something like that.
It was quite the opposite, but how could he explain that? She was so incredibly strong, how could he ever live up to that? Sure, he could fly decently, even with his new leg. But surely soon she'd wonder why he was doing so much worse than she was at everything else.
A warble interrupted his thoughts and stuttering, as his eyes were drawn to Toothless and Stormfly entering the square, playfully batting at each other.
"I, uh, I should go for a flight on Toothless. We haven't flown today, and he gets moody if we don't," Hiccup said, grateful for the excuse.
"Oh. Okay. I'll see you later then," Astrid said, and he thought he saw a flash of hurt on her face. But then she turned around, pivoting gracefully on her wooden leg, and called out to Stormfly.
"Come on, girl! Let's go train!" Stormfly squawked one last time at Toothless before following Astrid when she ran towards the edge of the village. Hiccup couldn't help but stare at her strange, yet somehow powerful new run, moving her wooden leg in a half-circle so it wouldn't hit the ground, instead of bending the knee like he would do.
Toothless warbled as he nudged Hiccup's arm, and when Hiccup looked at him he snorted and pointed his head in the direction of the forest, like he was saying "Why don't you make a move on her already?"
"It's not that easy, bud. Maybe… Maybe when I can run," he softly told the dragon, before climbing into the saddle. At least the cold air would cool his stump during flight. And maybe he could train a bit by himself later.
Astrid may be the best Viking on the island, but Hiccup would very much like to be number two.
Astrid cursed when her axe flew past the tree again. She should be able to hit her target easily! Stormfly squawking happily as she fetched the weapon only made her angrier.
Damn leg. Damn lack of a knee. Damn Red Death.
Damn her own stupidity.
She grunted a thanks to Stormfly when her axe was returned, before preparing herself for another throw. Astrid was surprised by how much harder it was. Running, jumping, ducking, she had expected those to be hard.
Not standing still and throwing an axe.
But it was. She had never paid attention to how she threw before. Now she noticed that she would automatically lean back, bending her right knee for extra momentum. But now she couldn't bend her knee. She had to awkwardly plug the peg leg behind her, dragging it back as she lowered her torso. Or just abandon the leaning part altogether.
But even that was surprisingly hard. Ten years of practice with a functioning leg seemed to have burned the move into her brain. And now she had to force herself to keep standing straight as she moved her right arm back.
Astrid nearly lost her balance when the peg left shifted in a patch of mud, and she swore again. At least no one was here to see her pathetic display. Well, Stormfly was here, but she didn't seem to care. Astrid was beginning to see why Hiccup liked dragons so much. They didn't care about you screwing up a few times.
Focusing very hard on keeping her legs straight, Astrid prepared to throw.
"YAARGH!" she screamed, unleashing her frustrations. The axe left her hand, spinning wildly… before landing in the grass, at least a foot away from the tree. Stormfly chirped happily, running over again and pulling the blade from the muddy ground.
Damn her lack of strength. Damn her lack of momentum. Damn her leg. Damn everything.
"One more try. Just stay calm," she mumbled, taking her axe from Stormfly. Focusing on the target, she lowered her body and moved the axe over her shoulder. But then she lost her balance and stumbled. Astrid braced herself to hit the ground hard, but then something pulled her back up. She looked to her left to see Stormfly lifting her up, holding her by her shoulder guard.
"Thanks, girl," she mumbled, shaken from the unexpected fall. It didn't make sense, she did the same move she had done a million times. She bend her right knee, lowered her body, and moved the axe over her-
Astrid looked down, and sighed when she saw the peg leg. Of course. No knee to bend anymore.
It was so easy to forget somehow. For all the trouble it caused her, the wooden leg didn't feel real. Whenever she wasn't looking at it, it still felt like she had a knee, and an ankle, and a foot.
Like she had a real leg.
She could even move the nonexistent knee and ankle. She'd close her eyes, lift her lower leg, and it would feel like she had lifted it. But then she'd look down and see a wooden leg that was still firmly on the ground. She could even feel the ground under her lost foot, even if the ground didn't conform to what she saw.
Somehow she had managed to learn the new movements she needed to run or jump, but it didn't feel smooth yet. It was like she was using an unbalanced axe or misshapen shield. And even when she moved her peg leg in a weird half-circle shape, it still felt like she was lifting her knee.
Stormfly crooned sadly, pushing her beak into Astrid's arm.
"I'm okay, girl. It's fine. It doesn't even hurt," she whispered. It was true. It didn't hurt. Maybe that was what freaked her out the most. Everyone had told her she should expect horrible phantom pains. Apparently everybody who lost a limb got them, no getting around it.
But they didn't come.
Hiccup got them, she could see that. He tried to hide it, but he was a terrible liar and actor. The way he had gritted his teeth as she helped him down the stairs this morning told her he was in a lot of pain.
And she just… wasn't. There was no pain, no itch, no discomfort. She just felt the original leg, like before. But this wooden stick didn't fit with that. It didn't belong there, even if the real part was gone.
Astrid looked down again, and lifted her lower right leg. It felt like the leg was up in the air, even if the stick remained stubbornly on the ground. She could see a muscle clenching in her thigh, but apparently it wasn't attached to anything anymore.
Except maybe her crazy brain.
She tore her eyes away, feeling sick, and decided to stop training for today. She was getting nowhere. It felt weak, though. Usually she'd train for hours and hours, not stopping until she mastered it. But maybe she just didn't want to master this new leg.
Astrid wanted her old leg back.
"Come on, Stormfly. Let's go for a flight," she said. Still holding her axe in her right hand, she put the other on Stormfly's horns, and pulled herself up and over. Her right leg swung over, and she tried to find the leverage to pull her left foot into the stirrup. Instinctively, she pushed her right knee against the dragon, twisting her right foot so it would hook under Stormfly's belly. Then she jumped with her left leg as she pulled herself up with her left hand.
Astrid realized her mistake a moment after jumping, and she couldn't stop herself from slipping. Thinking fast, she threw her axe away to free her hand, and tried to grab one of the horns. But in that moment Stormfly turned her head around to see what was going on, and Astrid grabbed nothing but air.
With a scream, she fell to the ground. Her left leg could not support her weight, and she fell backward, her head hitting the ground hard enough that she didn't hear the cracking sound when her right leg hit a sharp rock.
"Damn. Damn this leg. Damn everything," she groaned as Stormfly squawked loudly, turning around to examine her.
"I'm okay, girl. I'm not hurt," she said, before trying to pull herself back to her feet. When she put the peg leg on the ground, it suddenly buckled with a crack, making Astrid fall to her knee. Stormfly screeched loudly in panic.
Astrid cursed when she looked down and saw that the thick oaken leg had nearly broken in two. The lower half hang on by just a sliver of wood acting like a sort of hinge.
It almost looked like she had a knee again. The thought made her giggle, and suddenly she couldn't stop laughing hysterically. Stormfly crooned worriedly, poking her with her beak and putting her head under her arms.
"Astrid? Are you okay?" the voice made her freeze, even in her hysterical state. Her head flipped around to see Hiccup standing behind her, Toothless beside him.
"H-Hiccup! What are you doing here?" she managed to ask, trying to hide her broken leg as she jumped up to her left foot.
"We were flying when we heard Stormfly, and she sounded distressed. What happened?" he asked softly. Astrid nearly started laughing again when she remembered her stupidity. Gods, what was happening to her?
"Nothing, I just fell," she said, hoping he'd go home now and not see how terrible she was with her leg.
"Astrid…" Hiccup said as he walked up to her, a flash of pain appearing on his face each time he took a step with his left leg.
"That doesn't look like nothing. Now what happened? Did something go wrong during training? Did you drop your-" Hiccup stopped very suddenly, both of them realizing at the same time he mentioned it.
They hadn't talked about what happened yet. Hiccup hadn't been there when she lost her leg. He had shot down the Red Death, and was trying to escape the firestorm. At the same time, the explosion's shockwave had reached her. She hadn't expected it. She had been running forward, hoping to help Hiccup in some way, when all of a sudden she was pushed back by an enormous blast of hot air.
Astrid wasn't quite sure how it happened, but at some point while she fell she must have thrown her axe up in the air. She did remember the immense pain she felt when it came down, though. Slicing right through her skirt and leggings like it was nothing, before cutting through the flesh underneath.
The healers couldn't do anything but cauterize and stitch up. They found her, barely conscious. Apparently she had been trying to push the leg back where it belonged, even though it was completely torn off. Astrid didn't remember that at all. Her mother said she must have been in shock.
The next hours or days were a blur, as the pain was too bad to sleep, but couldn't stay fully conscious either. When everything was clear again she was in her bed on Berk, a wooden stick attached to her thigh. And she wanted nothing more than for things to go back to the way they were.
"Astrid?" Hiccup asked again when she didn't respond, and she was flung back to the present.
"I just fell. I… I wanted to mount Stormfly, and I… I thought I was stable, but I wasn't," she said, avoiding his gaze as he leaned on her dragon. Hiccup smiled.
"That's okay. I have trouble getting on Toothless sometimes too. It's hard getting the… you-know… in the stirrup just right," he said warmly, and she couldn't help but frown. Hiccup had a much more complicated saddle, designed to work with his prosthetic. But at least he still had knees he could use.
"It's not the same," she snapped, immediately regretting her harsh tone. Hiccup looked hurt, taking a step back.
"It's just… It's hard to do things without… without a knee or ankle. You don't have to change the way you move," she clarified, and Hiccup sighed before nodding.
"Do you need help? I can get you a new… you-know… from the smithy," he offered, and she was grateful he didn't push or argue with her.
"That's not… I've got a spare… at home. I'll ride on Stormfly," she said, turning back to her dragon. But she found it impossible to put the ruined leg over the saddle. Knowing Hiccup was still watching her, she swallowed her pride and turned back to her boyfriend.
"Can you give me a boost?" she asked in a soft voice, wondering if he'd laugh at her. But he just smiled and walked forward. Toothless put his head under her, keeping her steady as she put her left foot on Hiccup's cupped hands. Then, the two boys pushed her up together, and she used the momentum to swing her foot into Stormfly's stirrup.
"Thanks," she said, looking at the horn in front of her instead of Hiccup.
"You're welcome. And… Astrid… You don't have to do this alone, you know? I… I can help," he said, and she nodded.
"I know. But I'm good. Come on, girl," she said, still avoiding his gaze when Stormfly shot into the air. What did Hiccup think of her now? Did he think she was weak? Stupid? Gods, he was so much stronger than her, so much more in control. He just swallowed the pain and accepted his prosthetic, while she ignored hers.
It was only when she was nearly home that she realized she had forgotten her axe. She cursed loudly, making Stormfly croon worriedly. The weapon still lay there in the clearing where she had thrown it. But she didn't want to go back to get it. What if Hiccup was still there?
"It's okay, girl. I just forgot my axe," she said, stroking the horn in front of her. Stormfly suddenly veered around, and Astrid couldn't stop a yelp.
"No, we'll just go home! I don't want to see Hiccup right now," she said, pulling on the dragon's head. Stormfly reluctantly obeyed, though she cawed in a surprised tone, like she was asking why.
"It's… I don't want him to see me like this. Maybe… Maybe when I can throw an axe," she sighed as they landed at her house.
"Okay, you can do this. It's easy. Just knock on the door and say what you practiced," Hiccup told himself, pacing in front of the Hofferson house. Toothless rolled his eyes before shoving Hiccup toward the door, clearly sick of his rider's nervous behavior.
"Alright, I'm going. No need to push me!" Hiccup muttered, walking toward the door, using Astrid's axe as a makeshift cane to lean on, while holding the other package in his right hand behind his back.
"Here we go. I can do this. It's just Astrid. She won't kill me, probably. What if she does? She doesn't like it when people touch her weapons. Maybe this is a bad idea. Maybe I should put the axe back in the forest and pretend I didn't take it. This is crazy! And what if she doesn't like the gift? She probably won't, she practiced so hard with her-" Hiccup rambled to himself, before being suddenly interrupted when Toothless shoved him against the door. The dragon punched the door himself twice more for good measure, before drawing back to glare at Hiccup.
"Don't look at me like that. I was just… planning. Covering all possibilities. And you-" Hiccup told Toothless before being interrupted again.
"Hiccup? What are you doing here? Why were you hitting the door that hard?" Astrid asked, and he pivoted around on his prosthetic, thankfully managing to keep his balance this time.
"Oh, uh, hi Astrid, hi Astrid! I was just, uhm, I was just passing by when Toothless…" he glanced around at the dragon, who was now staring at him with big adorable eyes. Stupid dragon. How could he stay angry at him when he looked so cute? And with eyes like that, why would Astrid ever believe the Night Fury would be so mischievous?
Toothless was way too clever for his own good.
"Is that my axe?" Astrid tore Hiccup from his staring contest, and he turned back to her, blushing when he realized he was caught.
"Uh, yeah. You, uh, you left it in the forest yesterday, after… you know, and I figured you'd probably need it for training today. So I took it. And here it is," he awkwardly said as he presented the axe to her. Astrid frowned, before stepping out on her spare peg leg and taking the axe from him.
She examined it for a while, swinging it back and forth and feeling the edge. Hiccup felt sweat dripping down his back as he awaited her verdict. Had he damaged it? He had sharpened it in the forge last night, maybe she didn't like that? What if-
His frantic thoughts were interrupted when she turned to him. Hiccup feared the worst, when suddenly she smiled brightly and said "Thanks! And you sharpened it as well! You didn't have to!"
"Oh, uh… you're welcome. And it was no big deal, I was in the forge anyway…" he said, unsure of how to approach the other reason he was here. The wrapped gift was hidden behind his back for now, but how could he explain it to her?
Astrid suddenly grinned, and he wondered if she knew all about it. Had she been spying on him? No, of course not, she wouldn't spy on him. She was too busy for that! But maybe she had seen something when passing by the forge. Or Gobber had told her!
"Is there something else?" she asked in a playful voice, and he was frozen in place. Oh gods, what was he supposed to say now? He had practiced this, but why couldn't he remember the words? Oh Thor, he was keeping her waiting, but he couldn't give it to her now, his hands were too sweaty and she'd think it was stupid and-
"Oof" Hiccup exclaimed when Toothless' tail suddenly hit his arm, making him drop the heavy package. He turned around to glare at the dragon. Toothless was curled up, licking under his armpit and looking like he wasn't aware at all of what happened.
Sneaky bastard.
"Hiccup? You okay?" Astrid tentatively asked, and he remembered she was still there. And there was no way she hadn't seen it now.
"Uhm, I made something for you, and I hope you like it, and that it fits, and… Oh gods… Maybe it's better if we go inside," Hiccup managed to say, desperately hoping no one was watching him screw this up.
"Okay, sure," Astrid said, and he managed to smile before picking up the gift and following her inside. Toothless ran around the house to Stormfly's stable, satisfied that his work was done.
"My parents are fishing, so we're alone. So what is it?" she said. Hiccup tried to keep his breathing under control while he put the package on the table.
"It's, uhm, well, it's…" he stuttered, feeling the blood fill his cheeks and making him blush bright red. Suddenly Astrid put her hands on his shoulders.
"Breathe, Hiccup. Relax. I'm not gonna punch you or anything," she said, looking him straight in the eye.
"You won't?" he said without thinking, and she laughed.
"I can control my violent tendencies, if I want to," Astrid said, before gesturing at the package. "Can I open it?"
"S-S-S-" Hiccup started to stutter, before forcing himself to close his eyes and take a few deep breaths. He could do this. He had faced the Red Death, he could face his crush. Thankfully Astrid didn't push, just kept her hands on his shoulders and breathed with him.
"Sure. It's yours now," he eventually said, and she smiled. His breathing was much calmer now, and his muscles weren't all clamped up. His stomach was still filled with butterflies, though. But the gift was there now, and he couldn't stop her from opening it.
She eagerly tore at the ropes, grabbing a small dagger from her remaining boot to cut a stubborn knot, and Hiccup's eyes were drawn to her wooden leg. It looked identical to the one she wore yesterday. Did she like that design? He should have asked her first.
"It's… Oh…" For the first time he could remember, Astrid was speechless when the cloth fell back to reveal a shining prosthetic leg. It was shaped like a normal leg, with screws allowing the knee and ankle to turn.
"Y-You said yesterday that you missed having a knee, and an ankle. So I build this. It's hollow, and there are gears and springs and pulleys inside that will raise the knee and move the ankle if you lift it," he explained. Astrid remained silent, staring at the leg before slowly reaching out and running her fingers over it.
"I, uhm, I used Gobber's measurements of your leg to build this, I hope it fits. It should, I think. It's probably a lot heavier than you're used to, but I figured that you could handle it, you're so strong after all, and-"
"It's amazing," Astrid interrupted his rambling, and he froze. She actually liked it?
"You… You're not angry?" he asked, and she laughed again before suddenly turning towards him.
"Hiccup… Look, I know Berk hasn't been very… accepting of your inventions, but things are different now. I think your inventions are amazing, and you should be more proud of them," she said, and he blushed, before looking down at his feet.
"Thanks," he managed to whisper, and he saw her smile in the edge of his vision.
"Now, I'm gonna try this on," she said, and he smiled as well, before turning away when she reached under her skirt.
"You can turn around now," she said after a minute, and he couldn't help but feel pride when he saw the leg was the perfect length.
"Does it… Does it fit? I can make it tighter or looser," he asked, trying not to look at her skirt too much, and instead focusing on her metal foot standing much steadier than her old peg.
"It's perfect. It feels like… me! I have a knee again! Look at it!" she said happily, raising her leg, and the knee joint turned. The ankle turned along with it, moving the entire leg in a sort of 'Z'-shape, with her foot and upper leg parallel to each other.
"It's heavy, but that's good. The old one felt too light," she continued, and he nodded.
"I, uh, I figured that as well. Like, it broke so easily, so I thought that you'd probably want something that's more durable. You don't want it breaking in battle! It's bronze, so it's sturdy, but doesn't rust like copper or iron would. So you can slide through mud with it, or stay out in the rain," he said as she took a few tentative steps. On her third step she slipped, and he ran forward to catch her.
"Looks like you're helping me now," she said, and he nodded.
"Yeah, now we're even, right? You have to start over, so your head start is gone," Hiccup joked, and she smiled, before glancing at his leg.
"Does it hurt?" she asked, making him sigh. Part of him wanted to lie, but what was the point? She knew, and she was the only one who might understand what he felt.
"It does. It burns. It's always… It's like there's a flame in the… stump, and it never goes out. Sometimes it's more intense than others, but it always hurts," he admitted, and Astrid guided him over to the chairs, leaning heavily on him.
"That sucks. Maybe Gothi has something for that. She gives my mom a potion for her back pain, so maybe that'll help," she suggested, and he nodded as he sat down. He hated the idea of going to Gothi for help, but she was right that it was necessary.
"Does yours hurt?" he asked, glad that they were finally able to talk about it.
"It doesn't. But it… it always feels like it's still there. Like I have a knee and foot and then I look down and… they're gone. That's why I'm so happy with this new leg, it matches what I'm feeling! So thank you!" she said, before leaning over and pulling him into a hug.
"I, uh, I have more ideas for it. I thought about adding a spring in the heel to allow you to jump higher. You might be able to store supplies in the hollow leg. And maybe add some spikes to do damage when you kick an enemy," he said, and she giggled.
"I think I need to get used to the simple version first, but those sound great! You should be proud of yourself," she said, and he felt warm all over.
"Thank you too. For… For not giving up on me," he said when she pulled back. She smiled brightly, before suddenly lifting her arm and punching him hard.
"Ow! What was that for?!" he shouted, and she giggled.
"That was for almost being too nervous to give this to me!" Astrid said, and before he could process it she put her lips on his.
Hiccup was too shocked for the first few seconds to respond, but then he tried moving a little, tilting his head so their noses weren't rubbing against each other.
Finally she pulled back, and the panicky part of his brain, silent during the kiss, was firing up again. Did she like it? Could he do it again? What if his breath was bad? Was his face sweaty?
"And that was for being the boyfriend with the best gifts," she said, putting her hands on his shoulders again. He was her boyfriend? Astrid called him her boyfriend! Oh gods, don't freak out. Don't freak out! Stay cool! Apparently she liked it!
He managed to not pass out, instead producing a goofy grin. She pulled him up out of the chair, and they leaned on each other as they walked to the door.
"So… wanna throw axes with me today? You're going to have to support me while I get used to this," she said, and he couldn't help but nod. There were worse fates than supporting Astrid Hofferson. Especially when she supported him as well.