Pizza
(Chiba x Hayami)

Disclaimer: I don't, and never will I, own Ansatsu Kyoushitsu/Assassination Classroom.

When Chiba woke to the sound of his doorbell, startled and his mind absolutely woozy, the first thing he did was to question why he, a quiet, sensible and mature person was friends with a perverted, loud and easygoing person by the name of Okajima Taiga.

He doesn't often drink and if and when he did, he only had a few shots, way, way less than the allowed alcohol content to drive. But he had given in to his so-called friend and apparently drank enough to get hammered and wake up with not much memories and a throbbing headache.

"Pizza delivery!"

Okay, so apparently also enough to have ordered pizza… for breakfast. (It also didn't occur to him how he could have done that last night, unless he sleep-dialled just half an hour earlier.)

Groggily, he went to answer the door, only to be so surprised his headache kicked in again. There was Hayami, smirking and oh-so-obviously amused and knew what had transpired the night before. She was holding a pizza box, a large, family-sized classic pepperoni from their favourite joint pizza box.

His greeting grunt was more than enough for her to know he was asking what the hell was happening with the universe.

"Well, you drunk-," she sounded gleeful at the word. "-dialled me to order pizza."

He groaned. He drunk-dials when drunk, duly noted.

"And gave special instructions to write a romantic 'will you marry me?' inside the box and send it to your pink-haired friend," she finished in a deadpan.

Merciful kami-sama, let the earth swallow him now.

"So you planned to propose with pizza," she said conversationally, as if they were talking about the weather.

He was thankful his bangs reached his cheeks. He was pretty sure they're redder than a tomato just then.

"Aren't you going to take your proposal pizza?" she asked teasingly as she held out the box. There was a certain glint to her eyes that made him slightly nervous, and for his brain to throb again.

"You really went and got me pizza? In, what time is it anyway?" he queried as he took it, fully inte1nding to turn and invite her in, but her expression told him she was up to something. He wondered whether she planted some kind of prank with the box, though he could smell that it was legit pizza inside.

She stayed rooted in her spot, obviously amused and expecting him to open there in front of his door. And so cautiously, he did.

There, on the underside of the top lid, were written in big bold letters "WILL YOU MARRY ME?"

"Well?" she questioned, amused but expecting an answer. "Everyone's wondering if we'd ever get married."

Years down the line, Chiba has grown wary whenever someone orders pizza for delivery. Because on one occasion, there was "congratulations, future daddy" written there, a few months after another came with "you should think of a name for a boy". Sometimes there's absolutely nothing, just regular pizza delivery, but one time there was nothing written again, and then his wife ordered him to look for the hot sauce and there, wrapped in one of the tissue papers that came with the pizza, he found a pregnancy test kit with 2 pink lines. And on that pregnancy, he decided to surprise her with "happy birthday, world's best mom" written in a pizza box but her nose turned up at the smell and promptly told the delivery boy to take the box away (Chiba still took it and paid for it, but kept it far, far away from her). They did not eat pizza for months after that (though more than made up for it by eating several boxes after the birth).

A/N: Hello! It's been a while, I actually found this written on a piece of paper while I was cleaning out my desk at home. I'm guessing it's one of those short pieces I wrote in the summer before I got my first job (2017) and my routine was to chill in the bathtub with either my laptop or pen and paper. Are you on lockdown/quarantine too (as of the time of posting)? I hope you're all safe. Also, I would like to point out that I just got some of my fics commented on by that hater/s and well, I've been totally inactive in a long while so I was pleasantly surprised when I checked the other ChibaHaya stories if they got the same hate comments (they did), and there are lots there now. Back when I was actively writing for the fandom there were only a couple of us writers and quite a few stories, really. I'm so glad there have been more writers keeping the fandom alive (I'm quite sorry I haven't gotten the time to read others' stories, even on quarantine I have work to do). Keep writing, writers, and keep reading, fellow ChibaHaya fans, don't mind the trolls!