Disclaimer: I own nothing. Trails of Cold Steel 1 and 2, along with the entire Legend of Heroes franchise and their plots and characters are property of Falcom and XSEED.

Hello everybody! This is Apex85 bringing you all my first story of 2017, my third Trails of Cold Steel One-Shot. This would have been out sooner, but the spark that let me get out my first two one-shots so quick before New Year's seemed to have flickered out. Probably because I got a major hangover during the New Years party that probably killed off some of my brain cells (which I admit weren't exactly in large supply to begin with). Then my uncle got me a PS4 as a late New Years gift and I spent most of my free time playing.

Ah well, its still quicker than how long it usually takes me to get a story out.

This is going to be bit different in that rather than focus on Rean or any of the other protagonists like my other stories, it will be my attempt to humanize a recurring antagonist of the Legend of Heroes franchise. Who is it? Well, my previous one-shot story Jackboot should give you a clue.

If you're not interested in seeing a story trying to humanize a villain who is likely to just plain cross the line, and probably get a different backstory that renders this whole thing moot come the next game, or if you think this will all be plain OOC, you're more than welcome to turn away now.

For those of you who are willing to stay, you have my thanks and I hope you'll enjoy this enough to leave a review.

Narration: Nice

Spoken words: "Let's have some fun"

Thoughts and emphasis: It's been far too long

(3rd person POV, Ymir Valley, Nortia Province, Erebonian Empire, December, 1199 of the Septium calendar)

No matter how many times I see it, the view of this place never ceases to surprise me with its beauty.

Such were the thoughts of the large man as he admired the sight around him. From the snow covered mountains, to the tall trees and the nearby river all gave the small town a humble, yet comely atmosphere from how nature was in abundance.

Gazing at the sights, the man couldn't help but give a relaxed smile. The sights were soon supplanted by a small rural village with many cozy wooden homes. He knew the place well as Ymir, the hot springs resort as well as his favored vacation spot.

Just as he finished taking in the familiar view, the cable car he rode in as the sole passenger-I swear its downright criminal how few visitors this place gets -reached the top and stopped.

He stepped out and was greeted by a receptionist. A young male with dirty blonde hair in a ...pink uniform?

"Greetings sir," The young man spoke,"Welcome to Ymir. My name is Luke. May I take your luggage?" He ventured as he gazed on the visitor. A large man who appeared to be middle-aged, with short brown hair and a square face partially obscured by a scarf and coat while a pair of sunglasses were adorned on his eyes. He was dressed in a simple brown winter coat, black trousers, and mountain boots while carrying his luggage consisting of a duffle bag behind his back and a suitcase held in his left hand.

"That won't be necessary," The man responded."I can handle it myself. Also, I've been here before so you won't need to give me directions." He preemptively summarized for the young lad.

"Very well. Thank you and I hope you enjoy your stay here in Ymir." Luke politely said as he waved at the man's retreating form. The visitor responded by waving his own hand over head.

True to his statement, the visitor quickly reached his destination. A large wooden building decorated with a pair of banners. On the left was an emblem of the Imperial coat of arms of a bronze stallion. On the right was the emblem of the local ruling noble family House Schwarzer, with the head of a stag on a simple yellow background. Around the corner to its back, one could make out some bits of steam coming from the outdoor hotsprings to its back.

He stood before the pride and joy of Ymir Village, the Phoenix Wings Inn.

The visitor walked through the door and reached the counter, where he met the old man he recognized as the inn's manager.

Turning around to see the visitor, the old manager gave a courteous smile in greeting. "Welcome to the Phoenix Wings Inn. I am Manager Baggins, how may I help you?" He politely asked.

"Yes, I've already made a reservation for a single room." The visitor responded as he brought a letter from his coat pocket and handed it to the old manager.

The older man held out the letter and read it, his eyebrows nearly shooting up in surprise, before returning to his impassive face. "I see," the manager responded while handing back the letter as well as a pair of keys to the guest," your room has been prepared on the second floor. Purple! Would you please handle our guest's-"

"No need," The visitor interrupted, room key in hand,"I didn't bring much so I can handle taking this to the room myself." He stated as he walked towards the stairs to the next floor.

"Very well, I hope you will find your stay an enjoyable one." Manager Baggins stated, causing the guest to wave in response as he reached the stairs.

(Phoenix Wings Inn, room 208)

The guest quickly found his room and opened door. Looking inside he found a decently sized room with a wooden clock by the corner, sofa and table, closet which had a mirror next to it, single queen sized bed and a door that lead to the bathroom, as well as a single window that allowed him to see the village.

He couldn't help but smile at the sight. By some chance he always ends up taking this exact room when he visits the inn. Honestly, this room never changes no matter how many times I come here. Though for me to end up in the same room everytime Baron Schwarzer had a hand in this no doubt.

Shaking his head to be rid of those thoughts, the guest set his luggage down, emptied his bags and placed his spare clothes in the closet. That taken care of, he gazed at his reflection in the mirror.

Deftly, he unbuttoned the collar of his coat and removed his scarf, revealing a strong jaw with signs of recently shaved facial hair. He then removed his sunglasses to reveal green eyes.

Gazing at his reflection, the man couldn't help but wonder out loud.

"I doubt a mere haircut and shave would be enough, though I wonder how long it would take for people to recognize me out of uniform." Such were the thoughts of Imperial Chancellor Giliath Osborne.

He shrugged for a moment before going to the bathroom to wash up.

(Later close to the village center)

Soon after setting everything up in his room, Osborne changed out of his original clothes and put on a plain track suit.

After walking down to the counter to inform the manager of his plans, with instructions to make sure noone goes in it for housekeeping or otherwise, he went out of the inn and began to jog around the village.

Though he found his position as Chancellor useful and appreciated the Emperor giving him the position, he still could never help but be dismayed at how it kept him from having many opportunities to exercise. Long time though it may have been since he was fighting on the frontlines in the Imperial Army let alone actually had to fight, he always made sure to to stay in shape. Unfortunately, since taking his vaunted position the opportunities to do so became scarce and far in-between.

While it wouldn't make up for all the time he has lost, his run through the village did seem to help out. The fact that it allows him to go around to see the rest of the village to see how much it might have changed since his last visit.

Quite a few things. The wife of the storeowner, Plover I believe, seems to be selling some eastern delicacy called manjuu. And were those children practicing folding paper into the shape of birds? Was all this truly the result of a single hermit's visits, or did some immigrants from the East enter here when noone was looking? Shouldn't they be closer to Kreuzen instead of this far up north if that were the case though? The Chancellor wondered.

So caught up in his sightseeing, Osborne took his eyes away from the road for a moment which distracted him to not notice the young local in front of him until he collided with him.

"Oof-" Came the response of the passing local who fell to the ground from the impact of Osborne's large frame.

"Sorry," Osborne responded, quickly bending down to offer his hand to help the lad he bumped into. "I let myself get distracted while jogging." He succinctly offered to the boy.

"No, it's fine," The boy responded as he took the offered hand. As he slowly got back to his feet, Osborne was able to get a better look at the boy. Young, probably had yet to fully reach puberty, dressed in a modest brown winter coat, boots, and black trousers. A mop of messy black hair was adorned on his head.

The boy looked up at the man and Osborne felt his eyes widen a fraction as a pair of familiar fuchsia eyes gazed up at him.

"I was busy looking somewhere else and wasn't watching where I was going so, it's alright," The boy closed his eyes and smiled, oblivious to the Chancellor's surprise.

Unbeknownst to the boy, Osborne's thoughts trailed off at a selge-a-minute as various emotions flew through his head. Surprise, recognition, joy, regret, and many others which would be too complicated for such a young boy to comprehend. A lesser man would have been caught gawking with their face stuck in bewilderment, Osborne however managed to quickly hide the surprise from showing on his face thanks to years of practice in the military and politics.

With practiced ease he schooled his features and proceeded with asking the boy. "Are you certain?"

"Yeah, I'm fine." The boy shrugged. "Accidents happen and I'm not hurt. No harm no foul." He continued as he brushed snow off himself. Slowly, he gazed back at the man in front of him, noting his appearance. "Haven't seen you around these parts. Are you a visitor?" He curiously asked.

"That I am." Osborne in a soft tone which he very rarely used. "I had some time off and thought visiting this quiet little town would make a fine place to escape the hefty burdens of my workplace."

"Oh, that makes sense." The boy nodded. He then scrunched his brow as he took another gaze at Giliath's form before trailing off. "You kind of look familiar though. Have we met?"

A long time ago we did and knew each other well. Pushing away his thoughts, which he made sure wouldn't appear on his face, Osborne replied, "Perhaps, this isn't the first time I've come here. Maybe you saw me during one of my previous visits?"

"Oh, I guess that makes sense." The boy nodded."Well I hope you enjoy your stay. Ymir isn't big, but it's pretty nice. Plenty of ways to relax and plenty of decent sites. Anyway, I have to go, had plans with some friends." The boy waved as he ran off.

Osborne responded in kind and waved to the boy's retreating form. As he gazed at the boy running to meet with his friends, Osborne couldn't help but let out a slight smile.

You won't need to worry. Seeing you again easily trumps any mere attraction. It's good to see that you are doing well my son.

(One Hour Later, Phoenix Wings Inn food and bar)

Giliath took a quick sip from his coffee. After doing so,he nodded towards the man at the counter, giving his non-verbal approval of the brew.

After he had finished his jog, he retired back to the inn and went to the bar and restaurant left of the counter. By a stroke of luck, there were very few people so he could have some privacy to enjoy his meal while reading the latest issue of the Imperial Chronicle.

To his chagrin, he found that rather than anything relevant, the paper merely seemed to vomit out some biased accounts of some extremist noblemen mudslinging him and his reforms. Specifically, a rather scathing review towards the recently instated Governor of Heimdallr, Karl Regnitz over the man getting the position despite not having any aristocratic pedigree of his own.

'Spitting on the proud traditions of our proud Empire by allowing unworthy individuals into power'? Bah, the damned twits are just complaining about how they're not allowed to get and do whatever they want just because of their family names. Bet half the idiots complaining here don't even know what 'Governor' even means.
He scowled, before tossing the paper aside. He should have known looking at it would have been counterproductive for the rest he hoped to get here in Ymir, but his duty as Chancellor made him obligated to keep an ear to the ground on the happenings of Erebonia as well as keep tabs on his political rivals.

It wouldn't do to go back to Heimdallr when his vacation was over only to find out some Noble hired Jaegers to try and kill off his followers. Again.

Sighing, and biting down against the comings of a headache bound to resurface later on, Osborne took another sip of his coffee to banish the troublinh thoughts from his mind in the mean time.

"Now there's quite a sight. I wonder how the people would react to seeing their illustrious Chancellor so frustrated?" came the good natured jest from a familiar voice.

Gazing to the side, Osborne quickly found the speaker occupying the seat next to him. A tall middle-aged man about a decade younger than himself with short brown hair and light blue eyes. He was dressed in a brown waistcoat over a long-sleeve white shirt, black trousers and brown winter boots.

"I have to give you props." Giliath spoke in acknowledgement of the familiar man. "So far you've been the only to recognize to recognize me despite the haircut and shave." He then took a sip of coffee as the man ordered a drink from the chef.

"Well, its a pretty small far away town. Alot of the folks here go their whole lives without leaving so there's really not much reason to pay attention to what happens outside." The younger male stated as he took a sip of his own drink. "They know who you are of course, but they don't try to keep track your every action or memorize your picture."

"Such a shame that for all my work, I myself go unnoticed." Giliath quipped. He then arched an eyebrow as he turned to look at his impromptu drinking companion in the eyes with a serious expression. "But, as interesting as it is, you didn't come out all this way just to joke about my appearance. Did you now, Baron Teo Schwarzer?"

The now identified baron merely took another sip before heaving a heavy sigh. "I was walking down town after finishing my morning patrol. Then on my way back home, I see my son conversing with a stranger." He then set down his drink. "I go to take a closer look and learn it was the same man who handed my son over to me."

"That was not intentional." Giliath quickly responded. "I had merely went out at bumped into him by chance."

"I'm not trying to accuse you of anything." Teo stated, with his hands up in a placating gesture. "Was just surprised."

Giliath merely looked away as he took another sip of coffee. Seeing the other man's mood, Teo spoke up again.

"He's done well you know. Does well in school, pretty strong for his age too. Master Ka-Fai-"

"You mean the hermit." Osbornecut him off. "Is he not here?" He asked, recalling how there was no sign nor hair of the old swordsman's presence aside from numerous Eastern baubels.

The Baron merely shook his head. "No. Left and hasn't showed up since. You should know, you've known him for longer."

Osborne grimaced at the reminder. His former superior Vandyck was rather close to the renowned Sword Hermit, regularly staying in touch. Osborne still remembered the many times he saw the two old men drinking together during their freetime and most of all, that one time he saw the two have a spar in front of most of the division.

Osborne always did think of himself as strong, he wouldn't have made it to the rank of Brigadier General otherwise, but seeing General Vandyck be defeated by the Sword Hermit himself let him see just how little his own abilities in combat were in comparison.

"Have you truly no idea where he might be?" The Chancellor ventured. "Not even a hint or mention of anywhere he might go?"

"No, and I don't see why you're so interested." Teo replied.

"Forgive me, but I don't feel too comfortable with having a man with the skill and swordsmanship to take on an army by himself walking around the country unwatched." Osborne retorted. Not to mention, how his students Bright and MacLaine have caused so much problems. If he decides to take up any more students it'd be best to keep tabs on them.

His less than pleasant thoughts seemed to show on his face as Teo gave out a long-suffering sigh. "We're getting off-topic. I'll just get to the point: You just came here because you wanted to see how Rean is doing, weren't you?"

Osborne clenched his jaw and averted his gaze. For several seconds he said nothing and remained silent.

"..s" He grumbled.

"Say again?" Teo asked.

"Of course." The Chancellor grounded out. "I've always worried about him. What father wouldn't?!" He nearly shouted. To his fortune, he found the dining area empty save for himself, Baron Schwarzer, and the chef who knows when to keep quiet.

"If you really care about him," Teo spoke up after several seconds of silence as Osborne recomposed himself, "then why don't you try to talk with him? I am truly happy to have him as a son, that I won't regret, but even after all these years I still can't understand why you would just leave him here." The Baron looked aside.

"We've had this conversation before." Osborne declared. "It's too dangerous for him to stay with me. I had some obnoxious nobleman hiring a Jaeger Corps to 'teach me a lesson' mere weeks after I was appointed Chancellor. While I managed to get rid of them-" Except that oaf of a leader of theirs. Where in Hell's name did he run off too? "-it was only the first of many. Since then I've had numerous attempts on my life made by more enemies than there are cars in the capital. They are ruthless vipers who would gladly take any opportunity and opening to take me down, if they learned I had a son, they won't hesitate to use him against me." He ferociously raved.

Realizing his agitated state, Osborne took calming breaths and took a long sip of his coffee. Upon finding it finished, he asked the chef for another cup and sighed. "Besides, it doesn't matter either way. Because of that incident, he doesn't remember me or anything about his life before I handed him over to me. To Rean's mind, the only father he has ever had or needs is Baron Teo Schwarzer, NOT Giliath Osborne, the Blood and Iron Chancellor."

Teo had nothing to say to that. He gave no response and said nothing else. He merely watched and looked at the man before him. Sitting in front of him was not the strong and intimidating Chancellor of Blood and Iron, but a man resigned to a a accepting a great loss he had inflicted on himself.

Seeing the man in such a state, Teo could only sigh. This would be quite the story if Rean ever found out. Goddess only knows how well he'd take to knowing he has 2 fathers who care for him...Probably should phrase that differently so people don't get the wrong idea, especially Lucia.

Finishing his drink with a long sip Teo stood up and patted the Chancellor on the back. "You're a bit too hard on yourself there. One day I'm hoping to let him know the truth about you. Maybe not today, maybe not tomorrow, but he deserves the right to know. And while you might not be his father again, you can still have a place in his life. His heart's big enough." His piece said Teo walked towards the exit.

With one foot out the door, the Baron of Ymir turned back to look the Chancellor in the eye. "I have to go now, a lord's work is never done after all, even in a town as small as this. Sorry for taking up so much of your time. Hope you can still try to relax for the rest of your stay here. Why not go to the stream near the valley and do a little fishing? Can't get more relaxing then that and Plover's started to rent out fishing tools for visitors."

Osborne barely had time to arch his brow before Baron Schwarzer walked out the exit. He then looked down and finished his drink, mulling the words in his head for a while.

Fishing, huh? I suppose it has been a while since I've done that, there should be one I could rent at Plover's as well...Ah well, why not? Should probably try to do something to clear my head. What could go wrong?...

(Later on, Ymir Valley)

...And the answer is everything. Damn that Baron, he did this on purpose...Osborne's irritably thought when he arrived at Ymir Valley.

Deciding to take Baron Schwarzer's advice, Giliath went to Plover's goods to get some fishing gear. After several minutes of examining the wares, he found a decent quality set with the latest in Lakelord fishing equipment with poles, hooks, lures, and a decent amount of complementary groundbait.

His equipment set, he immediately headed over to the entrance of the nearby valley and found the local stream. To his surprise, there was already another person fishing by the river.

His surprise only increased, when said person turned and noticed him, and revealed the face of the very same boy he and the Baron had been discussing.

Mentally, he cursed Teo Schwarzer , who he just KNEW had intentionally set him up for this.

"Oh, hi!" The boy exclaimed, completely unaware of the man's mental fury. Rean then looked down towards the man's hands and noticed the familiar equipment he recognized from Plover's store. "Oh, are you here to fish? Bit of advice but they're a bit elusive this time of the year."

Shaking away his thoughts of vengeance, Osborne looked back at the boy. "Funny," He exclaimed with an arched brow, which to his surprise was reflected on Rean's face. Unimpeded my the uncanny resemblance, he pressed onwards. "I didn't think fishing to be a popular past-time with children."

"Oh its not really," Rean said while scratching his chin. "My teacher got me into it as a way to relax after training and I ended up stuck with the habit. Its pretty ok though, helps out with managing my temper and I can get decent fish to eat. They taste alot better when I catch them myself." He stopped and scratched his cheek in embarrasment. "Sorry, kind of trailed off for a moment there."

Osborne couldn't help but chuckle at the boy's innocent reaction. "No need to be shy. You're teacher must have been a wise man to instill interest in such a task to one as young as yourself."

Rean's cheeks flared bright red at the comment. "Its nothing really." He then turned away and cast his rod into the stream.

Still smiling despite himself, Osborne then stood over to the side and cast his own rod into the stream.

The two remained silent as they waited for the fish to bite. Several minutes passed and nothing bit. Through it all, they remained silence.

Several minutes later, and there lines hadn't even moved a little.

The silence also soon became awkward, with both males merely staring at the unmoving lures.

The silence was broken by a drawn out yawn from Rean.

"Bored already?" Osborne asked without meaning to.

"Actually just tired. Trained with my sword for a bit too long." Rean absentmindedly replied.

"Swordsmanship eh? Would it happen to be the same old swordsman the townsfolk have mentioned going to and fro the village?" Osborne asked, despite already knowing the answer. Nothing wrong with knowing how well he's doing after all.

"That's the one." Rean's eyes lit up. "Yun Ka-Fai the Sword Hermit. He taught me everything I know."

Smiling at the boy's enthusiasm, Osborne couldn't help but smile. "He taught you well I take it?"

Rean deflated at the question, which wiped the smile off Osborne's face. "Well he sort of had to leave a little while back. He left some decent pointers for me to practice but..." Rean trailed off.

"And what," Osborne asked slightly forcefully. "Reason did he have to leave his student without completing their training?"

"Well... " Rean rubbed the back of his head. "He is a hermit. Never does stick around in one place for too long. Only stays around when things are interesting."

The whole 'he left me alone because he lost interest' was unsaid, but Osborne picked it up nonetheless. I know I don't have the right to judge, but it still vexes me. Calm down Giliath. It won't do to lose your temper, at best he'll think you're a creep.

His thoughts were interrupted as Rean felt a tug on his pole. "Hey, I finally got a bite!" The raven haired pre-teen exclaimed, his somber mood forgotten as he pulled the rod. Predictably, his pulls just made the fish struggle even harder. After several seconds, of fruitless pulling, the fish escaped. "Damn it."

"No luck?" Giliath joked.

Rean just glared at him and wordlessly tossed his hook back into the stream without a word.

Osborne just smiled. Then he felt a tug on his own line. With minimum struggle, he successfully reeled in a trout which he then showed off to the boy.

Rean's only response was to cast his rod out with a huff. There was no response.

Several minutes later, Osborne reeled in another bigger fish and flashed a smile that the boy couldn't help but call cocky.

He tried again and felt something pull. Unfortunately, just like the first time, it got away when he pulled. "Damn it why can't I get any!?"

"Need some help?" Giliath asked as he walked over to Rean's side.

Rean didn't have time to respond as he felt a harsh tug on his line nearly taking him off his feet. He would have fallen over if Osborne hadn't grabbed on to him in time.

"Hold on tight, wouldn't want to let such a prize go now would you?" Osborne stated as he held Rean in place by his shoulders to keep the boy steady. Nodding in gratitude at the man's support, Rean held onto the fishing rod with renewed determination and pulled.

The fish continued to resist, but Rean persevered and continued to hold the rod firmly. As he felt the fish tug harder he pulled with greater force. Slowly, he saw his catch's shadow creep closer to the coast, which spurred him on to pull even harder.

"That's it, just a little more." Osborne encouraged. Rean responded by strengthening his grip. He quickly to a deep breath, set his feet firmly on the ground, and focused all his strength into one last titanic effort pulled.

His efforts were rewarded by a giant fish practically flying out of the water as he dragged it out with enough force to fly overhead.

Upon looking over to see their capture, man and child stood in surprise at the sight.

A long bright blue body which blended near perfectly together with the blue river it had inhabited and long flowing, golden fins. It was a rare but easily identifiable sight, even to Osborne who only visited the town sporadically.

"Ymir's Guardian..."Rean breathed out in awe. Right there stood the fish spoken only in stories which he had only seen once by chance when he was younger. He couldn't believe it.

His dazed thoughts were interrupted by a hearty laugh by his benefactor. The man patted his head as he gave the boy his graces. "To have captured the legendary fish, quite an accomplishment for one so young."

Rean beamed with pride. For some reason, being praised by the man made him feel immense pride. He couldn't explain why though, but he seemed...familiar?

"I couldn't have done it without your help." Rean gratefully replied. His eyes widen for a fraction as a sudden thought occurred to his young mind. "Say I didn't ask before but, what's your name?"

The man was silent for a moment, then he smiled and put his hand on the boy's head and ruffled his hair. "Just call me Gil."

As the boy attempted to move the large hand off his head, Giliath couldn't help but laugh.

OK, perhaps the Baron doesn't need to be hurt. After all, I wouldn't have seen my son smile otherwise.

So there you go. Not one of my best works and I'm aware most people would call BS and OOC on how Osborne was acting.

Won't deny that Osborne won't win any awards for decent parenthood or decency in general. But hey, the scene where he was reluctant to give up Rean showed that he did care at one point, and his first words said directly to Rean after he remembered him was 'I'm glad to finally see you again my son. You've grown into a fine young man'.

While his exact motivations and sincerity are up for debate, those were still WAY more than Gendo Ikari and Charles Zi Brittania ever did for their children. Not much I know, but still better than nothing.

Speaking of Gendo, anyone else expect an Evangelion set up? You already have the protagonist (Rean) piloting a sentient mecha made from parts of an ancient inhuman entity (Valimar) being used by his Magnificent Bastard father (Osborne). Said father than hijacked a plan from some secret society(Ouroboros) and said plan's purpose of 'guiding the souls of all' had me thinking of instrumentality. Let me know your thoughts on that.

Back to the story, if you want to say anything about his conversation with Baron Schwarzer, I figured he'd have some connection to the Chancellor for the guy to trust him to raise his son. Considering Baron Schwarzer tells Rean 'I'll tell you everything I know about your BIRTH' instead of just 'your biological family' probably means he and Osborne must have some sort of history and might be privy to the man's motivations for handing him over and perhaps some insight on Rean's power.

As for what those motivations and insights ARE, I have a few ideas but they're better off for an actual multichapter story instead of a stand-alone one-shot. They'll probably be rendered false come the next game anyway.

As for Osborne not being recognized with just a shave and haircut, it was a bit much but I like to think it works slightly better than Clark Kent. Considering Class VII could walk around during the Civil War and weren't identified on sight despite being on top of the Alliance's wanted list and including members like Jusis (the son of one of their leaders and younger brother of their Chief-of-Staff), Machias (son and spitting image of the Reformist Governor Regnitz), Alisa(daughter of the head of their greatest industrial arms manufacturer). Seriously, anyone competent would probably memorize their appearances when they're all such high priority targets with their own wanted posters. And since Princess Alfin could go around in her school uniform and not be recognized until she identifies herself outright, I'd say it wouldn't be much of a stretch.

And to all readers from the United States, how likely would you recognize Donald Trump if he walked down the street in a casual track suit without that orange...THING on his head?

Anyway, there you go. Please read and review. If there's anything nice or wrong feel free to point it out.

But remember: NO FLAMES ALLOWED!