Hi there.
Recently, I have read so many [Gamer] and self-insert-reincarnation-FanFiction that these concepts rooted themselves so deep into my (insane) mind...
Who am I kidding? I decided to throw some concepts together and 'do my worst'.
Anyways, before I bore you to death with ten pages of ramble, I'll leave you to that little monstrosity here.
Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto, The Gamer, Golden Sun, Nintendo, my life, my freedom... wait.
Afternoon / Weather: Rain / Forest
Newly born human children from every universe known to mankind (and all the unknown ones) should be really, really grateful for the fact that they don't really know what exactly happens during the traumatic event that is their birth. Obviously, there can exist the odd ones who remember the sensation of their birth for the rest of their existence, but still... everyone else can be happy! Because being reborn while being conscious is most certainly not an experience I would wish upon my worst enemy.
... Not that that is saying much, since my worst enemy is the secret boss from the Golden Sun series (curse yourself, Dullahan!), buuut...
But what? I actually have no Idea. Capital I.
Fact is: Count yourself lucky that you most likely completely forgot every sensation and impression you felt and felt during your birth. No, seriously, trust me: You are better off without these early memories!
So, with that out of the way, why do I recite a monologue inside my head? Well, I simply have nothing else to do... and because of this:
] - Congratulations - [
You lived such an uneventful and obnoxiously slothful life in front of your computer, doing nothing but writing horribly worded stories and distracting yourself with playing RPGs set on the lowest difficulty.
No, seriously, you did a very good job in assuring the continued survival of the human race by choking to death on a chicken's bone before you cold procreate.
Excellent job, minion!
Unfortunately, neither heaven, hell or absolute nothingness are interested in a slacker like you, so you are going to fix that. Have fun in the elemental Nations!
...
Oh, and some words of advice:
It is dangerous to go alone...
Take this.
Space-Time bending Kekkei Mora unlocked!
[ - The Gamer - ]
] - - - [
Lovely. A Random Omnipotent Being decided to mess around with someone's (my) soul, a random world and probably lots of other things, because Why. The Hell. Not?
Obviously, that is how I ended up in the death grip of my recently deceased mother, surrounded by the sounds, leaves, birds, trees, woodland critters, bears, dinosaurs, stormtroopers, rebels, bandits, pirates, acolytes, hawks, forest fires, wolves, thirst induced illusions and a headache inducing invisible cloud of radioactive waste. Or, in a nutshell, I lay in the grip of a corpse in a forest in the land of Villager-knows-nowhere! (Yes, I over exaggerate a lot.)
The fact that it is raining also doesn't help all that much to better the mood.
The worst of all though: If I survive, I have to go through puberty!
Again!
*Ding!*
Through continuous ranting inside your head and subconsciously materializing your irritation outside of your body, a new skill has been created!
[Project Killing Intent] [Lv.: 1] [PP to Next Lv.: 95]
[Active] [CP/m: 5]
Project your 'intent to kill' at your enemies... or everyone in general.
Enemies 10 levels lower than you will be rooted in place for 0.5 seconds upon activating this skill.
You are able to intimidate puppies and civilian toddlers.
During combat, the chance of enemies focusing on you is increased by 10%.
[ - - - ]
... Seriously? I learned a skill while being... not even two or three hours old?
... On the other hand, why am I complaining?
Well, speaking of skills, let's open the Stats menu, shall me? After all, I just have one day more to live before I starve to death.
] - Status - [
Name: K. _ Lv.: 0 [Exp to next Lv.: 1000]
Age: 0
Class: The Gamer
Title: Orphan
HP: 75 / 75 (0.09/s)
CP: 25 / 30 (0.01/s)
STR: 0 / VIT: 1
DEX: 0 / AGI: 0
INT: 8 / WIS: 16
Luck: 1
Stat Points: 0
Passive Abilities
K_ Origins
Something is differentiating you from other children.
HP-Regeneration is increased from 0.01% to 0.125% of the maximum HP per second. This bonus is not available if [The Gamer] suffers from Chakra Exhaustion.
-20% Damage taken by physical attacks. This bonus is not available if [The Gamer] suffers from Chakra Exhaustion.
+ 1 Strength per Level
+ 3 Vitality per Level
Traces of Autism
This definitely differentiates you from the majority of the other children.
+15% Exp gained from all sources (except abilities)
+100% Progress Points towards subjects of Interest and everything related to them
-50% Progress Points towards subjects of disinterest
[The Gamer] can be easily distracted
[The Gamer] will happily ignore all Killing Intent received
[The Gamer] may avoid large crowds. ("Too much noise... and activity...")
Chakra Hypersensitivity
"So that's what the fallout outside and the apple juice inside of me is."
[The Gamer] is a natural, passive Chakra Sensor
+25% Progress Points towards subjects in the skill subcategory Chakra Sensing
+25% Progress Points towards Chakra Control Exercises
-25% Progress Points towards Ninjutsu with Handseal-Requirements (The heightened awareness of Chakra prevents most subconscious Chakra movements. May be nullified in the future)
+20% increased damage taken from Ninjutsu.
Character may respond allergic towards injections of foreign Chakra. (Medical Ninjutsu etc.)
Gamer's Body
"Up Up, Down Down, Left Right Left Right, A B..."
Allows one to live one's life like a game. After sleeping in your bed, HP and CP will be completely refilled and most status ailments will be cured.
] - - - [
...
Well, at least the Fire Nation will not attack this world - since I know of only one world who refers to their mental, reality bending energy source as chakra and the world of the Last Airbender isn't it - , but being born into the world of Naruto has its own dangers... On the other hand, seeing that my first passive ability lets me regenerate my entire HP-pool within 13 minutes and 20 Seconds is just completely nuts... I mean... Seriously? Even Naruto freaking Uzumaki doesn't have that kind of Regeneration... Does he?
(Well, if he draws on the reserves of his tenant... Didn't Kurama completely regenerate a ball sized hole on Naruto's stomach within seconds? Jinchuriki OP.)
The second ability which is also completely nuts is [Traces of Autism]: I can learn techniques twice as fast if I want to learn them! How awesome is that?
... Actually, that ability might bite me in the behind later on, now that I think about it.
[Chakra Hypersensitivity]... It was its advantages and drawbacks. I am able to learn control techniques faster but I also take more damage from fireballs. Simple as that.
Being able to sense Chakra itself is nice, too. I guess if one is very, very dedicated, they could gain a sensitive enough sense that they would be able to 'see' the chakra pathways of other persons and map out the surrounding area based on the natural chakra filling the air. One could even effectively use Juuken.
Just think about an Uchiha wearing a blindfold and being highly capable in chakra sensing AND able to effectively use Juuken. He could trick opponents into believing he was a Hyuuga with oddly colored hair (if he hasn't dyed it) before removing the cloth, Amaterasu everything and going all Susanoo on them if they still stand. The trolling potential is real!
Likewise, if a Hyuuga were able to become a master in multitasking... Reading four unopened books at once, for example, might be a real possibility.
...
So, I should probably observe everything around me more... right?
But what for?
...
Well, I could take a closer look at the corpse I am lying on top of in order to find out some clues about my parentage, since I was preoccupied with far more pressing concerns before (short story: I reek)...
Actually, I am doing that right now. Better now than never.
My... biological mother of this life has shoulder length, whitish dark gray hair, divided by a zigzag-like hairline. A pair of slender, equally whitish dark gray eyebrows grace her face as well as a pair of red (tattooed?) dots above them. Her facial skin on the other hand is unnaturally pale, most likely due to blood loss...
She isn't lying inside a pool of blood, meaning that she had delayed her untimely death, escaped whatever decided to hunt her down, managed to hide somewhere and then I came along... That, or the paleness comes from the simple fact that she is dead for quite some time now. Well, she lays in the mud now.
... Actually... has it to be blood loss that ended her? Or was it just me? If it was just me...
Well, great then. Already killed someone. I am not even half a day old.
Anyways... how many clans within the Naruto-verse exist which's members display two red dots on their foreheads, have a zigzag-hairline and most likely are born with a ridiculously high health regeneration factor and boosted physical defense?
I'll be honest: Before my death, if I had not read a lot of FanFiction and open the Narutopedia for reference on some characters, I wouldn't have been able to answer this question: Either I am The grand-grand-granddaughter of Kaguya, the progenitor of chakra herself, thus most likely making me an Ootsutsuki, or my mother was an exiled member of the Kaguya clan. To avoid any kind of unnecessary headache, I'll go with the second clan option. The letter 'K' definitely fits.
] - Congratulations - [
For using that pathetic excuse of a brain of yours to come to the correct conclusion, one of your abilities has been updated:
Kaguya Origins
"Drink your milk!"
NEW: Grants access to the 'Death Bone Pulse'
Your Wisdom has also increased by 1.
] - - - [
...
So, I am a nameless Kaguya, don't know who my father is and my mother died during childbirth. I have access to a very powerful Bloodline Limit and live through my life as if it was a game. Stats and all.
Can it get any more cliché? Death parents so that the Random Omnipotent Being doesn't have to explain my presence, but creating some form of sympathy-nonsense, making me a 'poor, lonely orphan' that has to be protected? Oh, and let's throw in some god forsaken rain for the dramatic effect!
...
Well, since that is out of the way now, I'll then do my best at delaying the Kaguya-clan's complete extinction. Not that I can do a lot right now, but it is the thought that counts... right?
*sigh*
So, since I continue to slowly starve to death, are there other points of interest nearby? Other than fallout, insects, more fallout, so many trees that you can't see the forest behind them and, in case I had not mentioned it yet, more fallout?
] - Quest Alert - [
Major Quest
(Lv. 1) Cry, cry, cry while you can
Pick a god and pray!.. Or increase your survival chance by making your presence known to the patrol resting near your position.
Quest Rewards
Greatly increased life expectations
10Exp
Quest Failure
Death
Major Quests cannot be refused
] - - - [
... That might be something of interest.
Well, there is only one real choice here. Gotta do what normal babies do...
*Atshuu!*
"Pick a god and pray!" it is.
Dusk / Weather: Rain / Forest
*Atshuu!*
How many hours have passed since I got... dumped into this world? Six? Seven? Two? Well, since then I aquired three debuffs:
] - Current Ailments - [
Common Cold (Severe) (-90% Chakra regeneration, -35% Dexterity, -40% Agility),
Hypothermia (Medium) (-60% Hp-regeneration, -35% Strength) and
Thoroughly Soaked (+100% Damage received from Electricity and Raiton-Techniques, +50% Effectivity towards Chill-effects received).
] - - - [
I wish I could say something positive about that topic, but there simply isn't something positive to report. Forget the whole "Starving to Death"-idea: I will freeze to death before that happens. No, seriously, my probalby-six-hours-old body is not made for resisting the cold.
At least the nightly predators will have a fine meal... as well as the insects and worms afterwards.
Aren't I pathetic?
*Atshuu!*
I am hungry, I am exhausted, I am tired... and I am a baby. All because I was stupid enough to choke myself to death on a chicken's bone.
Still don't know what exactly triggered my first (?) death. Probably got pwned somehow... Something of an 10%-instant-death-aoe-attack that annihilated my entire party? Sounds about right. Such an unbelievable small chance... almost as bad as a Paralyze triggering six times in a row while the enemy's Rotom proceeds to use Double Team... Or the "Lunatic Plus"-difficulty in the newer FE-games... Given, Fates' version of Lunatic is tame compared to Awakening, but still...
*Atshuu!*
In the abysmal chance that I get picked up by the patrol, be brought back to their village and then NOT integrated into some form of underground organization, I'll have to reverse-engineer the Thoron spell. A lance consisting out of nothing but electricity sounds like an amazing way to pierce all kinds of defenses... and it would be flashy. Then again, without an efficient conductor - or without a conductor at all - the lance might be hard to control...
Bones conduct electricity... do they?
*Atshuu!*
I am running out of topics here and the primal urge to start crying like the little maggot I am gets harder and harder to suppress. I already have picked my god and prayed, god darn it!
Also, as soon as I cry, the woodland critters who do NOT already know where I reside will know where I reside... and the prospect of freezing to death sounds multiple times better than be torn in half. No, thank you.
For thinking things through before blindly rushing into things, your Wisdom increases by 1.
... Seriously? I haven't done a darn thing!
*Atshuu!*
Not that it matters, anyway. My sneezing might or might not draw the attention of the nightly predators to me...
...
That means, it also doesn't really matter if I cry or not. At best, the patrol - if they had not already become cautious through my sneezes - would investigate and elongate my life by a few years (or seconds if they want to spare me a violent death). At worst...
*Grrrr*
At worst that bear in the clearing will have a somewhat filling snack.
...In situations like these, when you managed to gain the full attention of a very hungry looking brown bear, there are only so many things a six hour old infant can and will do.
Natural urges...
"WaaaAAA!"
You win.
The bear trampled closer and closer to me and the corpse, its stench practically noticeable in the entire forest...
And it is at that exact moment...
*grrrrr*
...in which I realize...
"Dynamic entry!"
*splat*
... that there is a foot stuck in its head.
The foot of a person...
A person with a big eyebrow...
A big eyebrow with a twin besides id...
Two big eyebrows who are friends with a hairy bowl... and shiny teeth...
] - Congratulations - [
Through continuous observation of your surroundings, a new skill has been created and added to your list.
[Observe] [LV.:1] [PP to Next Lv.: 90]
[Active]
A Skill which allows the user to gather more detailed information about persons, landmarks and items. The higher the Level of this skill, the more information will be displayed. May not work on severely higher leveled allies and opponents.
] - - - [
] - Status - [
Name: Maito Gai Lv.: 34
Age: 14
Class: Chunin
Title: Budding Tajutsu Master
HP: ?
CP: ?
STR: ? / VIT: ?
DEX: ? / AGI: ?
INT: ? / WIS: ?
Luck: ?
] - - - [
] - Quest Complete - [
(Lv.: 1) Cry, cry, cry while you can
Your prayers had been answered.
Quest Rewards
Greatly increased life expectations
10 EXP (+ 10% + 15%) =
~13 EXP
] - - - [
...
I need a looong nap.
Night / Weather: Rain / Forest
Genma
Team Chouza (minus Chouza) were currently jumping through the dark forest. Before, on the insistence of their spandex wearing friend, they had decided to camp in the woods instead of sharing a warm, homemade meal in a tavern. Now though...
"Just patrolling the border," they said. "It's the border with the least activity," they said. "Nothing of interest here," they said.
Of course, on the way back from the border, back to their home towards from the Kyuubi-attack recovering Konoha, Gai, tasked to hunt for food, stumbles over the fresh corpse of a Kiri-Ninja. Well, Ebisu thought it was a Shinobi from Kirigakure, what with her being able to pass through "the border with the least activity" unnoticed... and her most likely once being affiliated to a certain clan filled with bloodthirsty, warmongering berserkers, if the two red dots on her forehead were any indication.
Oh, and then there is the baby. A scrawny, little thing. Not even a day old and already reeked like wet cow's shit. Thoroughly soaked by the rain and nothing but a sneezing, shivering bag of pale pink flesh. Yes, Genma wasn't all that fond of little kids, but that dislike came more from the D-ranks he had to endure during his 'Genin-days'...
After meeting Maito Gai, Uchiha Shisui became a handful, let's leave it at that.
(Genma could understand why Gai wasn't allowed to enter the compound ever again, but why were he and Ebisu banned as well?)
Back to the topic at hand.
How had a woman in her latest stage of pregnancy bypassed the border without anyone noticing? Even if she had been a trained ninja, it would have been sui...cide... to... cross the border... in her condition...
"Had she water-walked from a boat to the shore?" Ebisu spoke up. " I mean... the ocean is only three hours away from the position she... succumbed. Chakra exhaustion?"
"Well," Genma started, "it would explain why we haven't tracked her during our stay at the peninsula. It doesn't explain why she hadn't chosen to wait and stay at a harbor though."
Gai was uncommonly grim as he jumped from branch to branch. "Some of her clothes were singed. Her vessel could have caught fire and she had to resort to using Chakra in order to survive."
"And if she had set the vessel on fire herself?" the somewhat fresh, sunglasses wearing Chunin added.
Genma merely nibbled at his Senbon and gestured one of his hand to a specific scroll on Ebisu's belt. "Leave that question to the corpse diggers. The more pressing matter," the oldest member of Team Chouza (without Chouza) gestured at the sleeping infant in Gai's arms, "is currently tugged into our tajutsu master's spare jumpsuits. Seriously, Gai, how many of these things have you brought to this mission?"
The future 'Geen Beast of Konoha's' answer was the typical thumbs up and his winning smile, which somehow reflected the sun's light. (Genma had given up on making sense out of this phenomenon a long time ago.) "Genma-kun, one can never be prepared enough for the youthful adventures waiting for us!" Maito Gai then became serious again. "The girl will not succumb to hypothermia anymore, but that cold might prove to be a problem."
"Has she been fed?"
Genma and Gai glanced at their sunglasses wearing teammate as they continued to jump through the treetops.
Ebisu continued. "I-I mean, wouldn't it be a waste of time if we go out of our way to rescue a small child just to have it fall to starvation right at our doorstep?"
A beat.
"As always, you are right, my Youthful Friend. I shall-"
Genma cut off the loudest member of their team. "Gai, keep the volume down. The last thing we need is for our guest to start crying." The spandex wearing Tajutsu practitioner promptly shut up. "But yes, we should give her something healthy to drink."
Genma wouldn't hear the end of all this if the kid starved within Gai's arms... Neither from said faithful member of the Holy Church of Youth... or the old fossils from the council if they ever found out that they had a potential bloodline bearer in their possession and let a potential future asset die.
'I hate politics.'
Morning / Weather: Overcast / A small town
? ? ?
The smell of alcohol lay heavy in the air and loud groaning alerted a student of the impending awakening of her brown eyed teacher. The beginning of a normal day.
As always, the student filled two cups with tea and hoped that she had hidden the stash of liqueur well enough from her teacher, all the while trying to balance a few grains of sugar over another using only her Chakra. The shuffling through the lower cabinets within the kitchen mere minutes later announced the student's impending failure of the second task.
The student proceeded to empty the contents of a small flask into one of the cups of tea, stirred, offered the other cup to her teacher who would now pass her position...
"What in the-"
Except she didn't.
Glancing up from her position, the student searched for her teacher and found her inebriated gaze fixated at something happening on the other side of the window. The student, curious, stood up, made her way beside her mentor and followed her gaze with her own.
There, outside, a spandex wearing... individual balanced a multitude of baby articles with one foot while simultaneously doing pushups on one hand. A sunglasses wearing Chunin did his best to scold the individual, to no avail. Meanwhile, another Chunin, this one with a senbon hanging out of his mouth, fed an infant with a bottle of milk. The last sight would have been somewhat normal if the infant hadn't been cocooned into dozens of green spandex suits.
The student stared at the bottle in her teacher's hand... and then at the poisoned cup of tea in her own... just to stare at the bottle again... before glancing back at the cup.
"Shizune, we leave."
Sighing, the dark haired pupil of the Slug Princess downed her tea.
At least, she could work on her resistance towards poisons while they are dodging the debt collectors. As usual.
Author's Notes
Hi there. Again.
As you can see, the insert is a lazy *ss... and hasn't realized yet that his gender had been switched... Or that (s)he has to learn speaking Japanese. Then again, food and sleep are more important.
Yes, I gave the character the 'Shikotsumyaku' - the Death Bone Pulse -, passive Chakra sensory and a perk that slows almost all progress down... or doubles it. Part of it originates from another Idea I had (Gamer!Uchiha, Sharingan always active, Character gradually becomes blind after unlocking Mangekyu (Set: Kamui), Difficulty-Settings are insane (First C-rank: Sanbi, Sasuke-Retrival: Tenseigan!Kimimaro, ...) and the like) and the other part... making this character a Kaguya...
Yea, I have more or less stolen that. ^_^
(/ s/ 11141738/ 1/ The-Gamer-of-Sunagakure)
Why is the health regeneration factor so high?
The techniques of 'Death Bone Pulse' will have HP-requirements additional to the CP-requirements. (You are ripping your spine out, after all.)
Will this be an OP!OC-story?
Maybe, maybe not. Gai will make sure that the OC won't die in Gaara's sand coffin though, so... eh. Who knows. She won't enter the academy with Lv.: 57 though. Most definitely not, especially since she won't gain any experience if the mission's levels are 10 levels lower than her own.
(Mob/Mission Exp + Mob/Mission Exp*( (Mob/MissionLv. - CharacterLv.)*0.1) )
After completing the quest, the character got 13 exp instead of 12.65 Exp since I round this value up. Since she was Lv.: 0, she got 10% more Exp before the passive 15% came into play.
Alright, that is it for now.
Next up:
'Don't you dare giving me a bowl cut!'
The Hokage gains more paperwork to sign.
Have a nice day.
And thank you for reading my ramble.