A/N:

I am so sorry this has taken so long. This chapter is much longer than the previous ones but it didn't feel right cutting it into two so here it is. The final chapter of my ever favorite couple.

I've been back home for almost a week now but I still haven't gone to see Percy. He lives about 20 minutes away. I've been there enough times during high school to walk there even in the pitch-black night. But I can't find it in me to see him. I'm not even sure if he went home this break or stayed at campus. He hasn't posted anything on social media inclining to either situation.

I'm a coward. I'm so scared of seeing him and not be able to control my emotions. I'm scared to see that he's doing way better than I've been since he left. I'm scared that I wouldn't matter to him anymore. I'm scared that he's moved on.

I keep trying to convince myself to just go ahead. What else do I have to lose? I already feel like I lost my best friend. But if that detail actually becomes concrete…I don't even know what I'd do. I can't beg him to give me a chance after all the times I've hurt him. But then, if I never go to see him, I'll never know. Percy Jackson will always be my what if?

By the time I've finally convinced myself after a few minutes of pacing in my bedroom, then the living room, then deciding what's a decent enough outfit to wear when professing your love to someone, it's already dinner time. Dinner can wait though. I have to see Percy now. I'm out the door and walking in the night towards, hopefully, a brighter future with that idiot swimmer with me.

The 20-minute walk has been good. The cool night air helped calm down the nerves a bit. I got to think of what I want to tell him. I'd tell him what a dense idiot I've been. I'd tell him over and over again that I'm sorry I never noticed anything, and for all the times I hurt him. I'd tell him how much I missed him. How every morning I'd wish it was him in the bed opposite mine. How much I longed for his presence, his laugh, his smile. How much of I mess I've been without him. How much I've come to love him.

But now, I'm right outside his house, across the street. I thought I was prepared for anything but, apparently, I'm not. Their dining room is conveniently at the front of the house, with a wide window by it. I can clearly see him. For a second, a precious second, my heart stops. He looks happy. He's smiling. He looks so carefree. And he's not alone.

He's sitting at the head of the table, and to his right is the guy from the photo. They're laughing. Mrs. Jackson comes by to put some food on the table. She smiles right at Luke. I guess he's part of the family now.

Where does that leave me?

I stand there, across the street in front of their house having no clue what to do next. I was so prepared to just dive right in. Whether he still felt the same or not, screw it. It was a risk I was willing to take. But now? He's obviously really happy. I couldn't get in the way of that.

I don't know how long I've been standing here. I must look some stalker. With a breaking heart, I force my feet to move. But not without one last look though. Something I think I'll forever regret. Because there he is, Percy Jackson, in a warm embrace in someone else's arms.

I didn't realize I was crying until I feel the wind pick up and an increasingly uncomfortable chill on my face. When I go to touch my cheek, my fingers come up damp. I feel defeated and lost. I don't exactly know where my feet led me but it's obviously not home. I don't know for how long I've been walking. All I know is I'm not ready to go home just yet.

There's no one around, so I decide to just sit down on the sidewalk. And this is when I consciously let my tears flow freely. How could I have been so stupid? All these years, wasted because I was too blind to see what was right in front of me. All those afternoons after practice in high school. All those moments on a couch or on our bed in our dorm room, cuddled under a blanket while watching Finding Nemo, then Finding Dory. Every touch, every chance, every moment, wasted. All because I couldn't open my eyes wide enough.

What a pathetic site I must be. All alone under a damn street light, crying my eyes out for a boy who's moved on when I just figured out how I feel about him.

God, this hurts so fucking bad.

"Jace?"

Shit. Please, no.

"Jason?" I can hear him coming closer. I can't let him see me like this, I keep my head down. "Hey, are you crying?"

I hastily wipe my face with the sleeve of my jacket, doubting it helped any. "Percy!" I try to act as excited and surprised as I can muster. But then my eyes land on the figure a few steps back and I can feel my heart breaking even more. "Bro!" I cringe at hearing how forced I sound. "I didn't know you went home for break. How are you?"

God, he looks good. Please go.

He frowns at me, then lifts his hand to wipe off a few stray tears off my face. "You're crying. What happened?"

My best friend ran away and is happier without me.

I try my best to feign indifference. "What?" I try to act as if a just noticed my tear stained cheeks. "Oh damn, I didn't even notice. I don't know what's wrong with me. I think it's the weather. It's cold and I get…the chills? And you know, watery eyes?"

He obviously doesn't believe me. I see his friend take a step forward and I know I can't handle any more unless I want to embarrass myself in front of Percy and his new boyfriend. I quickly stand which makes Percy stumble a bit but Luke catches him before he hits the ground. Even in moments like these, Luke will be the better person for him. "So, it's getting late. I should go." And before he gets a single word in, I run. No, I don't walk away, or brisk walk even, I literally pump my legs as hard as I can and run the fuck out of there.

I can barely hear Percy call out my name. All I can concentrate on now is trying to control the sobs that are leaving me and the pounding of blood in my ears. My vision is blurry; I can't catch a breath. I don't know how far I run but once I spot a tree I quickly dash to it and heave while tears are running down my face. I'm trying so hard to stop but I can't.

"Jason! Jason! Where the fuck are you?"

I clasp both hands in front of my mouth so he can't hear the sobs that are leaking out. Why? Why is he here? He should have stayed with Luke. He doesn't need me crying and confessing things that don't matter anymore. I don't want to disrupt his life. He deserves so much more. He deserves this chance to be happy.

I can still hear him screaming my name and cursing out a bit. A few minutes later it's dead silent and I think the coast is clear. I peak a little from where I'm hiding behind and see an empty street. Good.

I stay for a couple more minutes, trying to calm down. When I can finally breathe normally enough and the tears have stopped, I stand, brush off the dirt and head home.

The walk back is nowhere as light as the walk to Percy's. Everything feels so heavy. My shoulders are sagging, my feet drag, and my head is bowed low. That's how I miss Percy sitting on the front porch.

"Jason."

I stop dead in my tracks. My eyes widen but I refuse to look up. Right as when I take a step back, Percy shouts, "Don't you fucking dare run away, Grace."

I can hear him approach me. "What the hell was that? I find you crying on the sidewalk near my house, you knock me on my ass, then you run? What's wrong with you?"

I can't help but wince at that, but I still can't look at him. I can feel him though. He's right in front of me.

"Jason." He says my name gently this time. How much I've missed hearing him say my name. "Jason, please. Just look at me." His pleading finally gets to me so I look up. His sea green eyes are just as bright and inviting as I remember them to be, but laced with such concern it hurts. I don't deserve his worry.

One look was all it took and my eyes start roaming. His hair has gotten a little longer, and a lot messier. Maybe Luke likes running his fingers through it. I've never noticed just how long his eyelashes are. And, god, his lips. So soft and pink, but turned downwards in a frown.

"Jason, talk to me. What's wrong?" He takes a step forward and looks like he was about to reach me but I flinch back. His frown grows deeper. "Just say something, please."

I just now realize that I haven't said a single thing since seeing him here. But I don't really know what to say. I can still act like nothing's wrong, but I don't have the energy. So I just look away towards the dark house. Everybody must be asleep then. I didn't realize how long I was out.

Percy looks back at the house too and must have come to the same conclusion that everyone is asleep. He walks right up to the door, reaches for the loose brick by the side where he knows we hide our spare key. He invites himself in and I have no other choice but to follow him. He makes a beeline for the stairs and into my room. I hesitate at the bottom of the stairs though. I don't know what to expect if I follow him. My eyes go to the hallway that leads to the guest bedroom.

"Don't even think about it." My head snaps up to see Percy with his arms crossed on the top of the stairs. "Get your ass up here."

With a sigh, I reluctantly drag my feet up each step and enter the room. Percy is just standing there in the middle. I don't know what else to do so I take a seat on my bed.

It's silent, no one is saying anything and I'm half convinced that maybe my exhausted brain only conjured Percy up because of what happened earlier. But then my computer chair squeaks like how it usually does when anyone sits on it.

"I don't know what's going on, but you can't just expect me to ignore what happened earlier, right?" I look up at him. He's elbows at his knees, hands clasped, and looking straight at me. "You're my best friend." It feels like another 10 pounds were added on my shoulders. "You can talk to me."

I still don't say anything though.

"Annabeth ran into Piper the other day." My whole body freezes. "Said you guys broke up. Are you okay?"

No. But I'd rather you believe that Piper broke my heart instead of you. But it wasn't your fault. None of this is your fault.

I finally look up at him. "Yeah, I'm okay. I'm sorry I freaked out earlier." I try to give him a smile. "But I am exhausted. I really need some shut ey-"

"Piper said you were in love with someone else." Percy cuts me off. I can feel my body trembling. Please, Percy. Please don't push for more.

He's looking at me so expectantly. I can't tell him that it's true. I can't tell him that I'm in love with him. Not now. Not that he can finally get rid of all the hurt I've caused him. But what the fuck am I supposed to say to that?

"Look, I know I haven't been in touch since I left." Please stop talking. "And I'm really sorry about that. But you're still my best friend, Jace." No, I don't think we can be. "You can talk to me. I'll even be your wingman!"

I can't help the pathetic chuckle that leaves my lips. "What?" Percy tilts his head at me. "Is she from campus? I'm sure I can still help from JU."

Of course, it isn't a big deal for him, helping me get together with someone else. Percy already moved on. And it stings that now he's willing to be my wingman when he never even responded to any of my calls or texts.

I can't listen to this anymore. I know I'm not being fair. He had to watch me be with Piper for so long. But dammit, I don't know where to go from here. I find my voice. "Look Perce, yeah me and Piper broke up. I don't know what she means by saying I was in love with someone else." Lies. "But I really am exhausted. I don't want to be rude, but can you go? I really need to sleep it off."

"Sleep what of, Grace?"

I don't care anymore. I already lost him. "Please, Percy. Just go." I turn to lay down but Percy grabs my arm.

"I'm not leaving until you tell me what's going on! You were crying, all alone, in a dark street! I can't just push that aside and ignore it. Just tell me what's going on. I can help!"

"No you can't!" I didn't mean to, but I pushed him way too hard, knocking him down. And now that I've started I can't stop. "You can't help me, okay? And I don't want it! I don't fucking deserve it!" Percy is just sitting there on the floor looking up at me while I pace and yell. "You left! You left and you didn't even have the balls to tell me to my face! Do you have any idea how much that hurt? I was a wreck, Jackson, a wreck! Piper got fed up with me because all I was, was a moping mess because I felt so fucking lost without you! God, then I realize all the shit I put you through. I was such a dense dick, I never saw it until it was too fucking late!" My eyes grow wide, and when I look back at Percy still on the floor, so are his.

"What the fuck are you talking about?"

All the fight and energy from earlier is draining. "Percy, please. Just go." I tell him again.

He stands up, "What do you mean all the shit you put me through? What's too late?" I don't answer him. "Dammit, Grace! Just tell me!"

And I almost do. But then I see him and Luke in the picture. I see them holding hands. I see them at the dinner table, laughing and hugging. I see Luke catching Percy. I'm not going to disrupt that. Love isn't selfish.

My posture screams defeat. This is the only way. Percy left Olympus University to get away from me. He found someone else in the process, and he's happy. He doesn't need or deserve any added drama. He's obviously doing so much better without me. I can't risk ruining that.

"Percy, leave. Now."

"No, not until you te-"

"I'm not telling you shit. So just leave me alone!"

"What the fuck is wrong with you? You can tell me anything. We used to tell each other everything. We're best bros. I can he-"

"No. We're not." It's deathly quiet how low I whisper this.

"What?"

"We're not bros. We're not friends. Just get the fuck out of my house." I try to add as much venom as I can muster in my words.

And this time, he listens. He gently closes my bedroom door and I lose it. The tears I've been fighting come pouring out again. Ugly sobs ripping through me. I don't notice how there never was a sound of the front door closing.

I stay outside his door, listening to his heartbreaking cries. What happened to you, Jace?

I wait until the sounds subside, which take almost half an hour. I know I won't be going home anytime soon. Good thing I told my mom I was either going to go home late or stay over at Jason's so she wouldn't worry. When I'm sure the crying has stopped, I gently open the door. Jason is curled up in his bed, his back to me.

I don't think he notices that I'm still here though. But when I come to sit by the edge of his bed, his body tenses.

I go to rub him back, but he flinches away from me. "I told you to leave me alone, Jackson." He sounds so broken.

"And I told you that I wouldn't go anywhere until you told me what's going on."

I can literally feel his body deflating. "I'm so tired, Perce." His voice so broken.

"Scoot over." Finally he looks at me, but like I was talking gibberish. "Come on, we've had sleepovers before. I'm not leaving you like this. You need rest, that's a given. But I'm still not going anywhere."

He finally moves a bit to give me some space, but his back is still to me. That's not a problem. I go to lay down and wrap my arm around his waist. He immediately tenses up again. I try to calm him. "I don't know what bullshit you said earlier about not being bros anymore." I can his chest wracking with another sob. "I'm sorry about how I left. We have a lot to talk about. But not tonight. Get some rest, Jace."

He silently cries for a few more minutes until finally I feel his breathing even out.

I wake up before Jason does, which is quite alright. He needs all the rest he can get before I dump him with the shitstorm that's been brewing in me since high school. I slowly release him from my arms and get up to the kitchen.

"Percy, honey!" Jason's stepmom is at the stove making eggs when she sees me. "I didn't know you were staying over! It's so good to see you. Sit down, do you still like your eggs sunny side up?"

I take a seat as instructed. "Good morning, Mrs. Grace. Is it okay if I take our food upstairs? Jason's still asleep and he's been up all night, I don't want to wake him up just yet."

Mrs. Grace readies two plates, one with sunny side up eggs and scrambled, for Jason, while the bacon is cooking. "Oh of course, dear. Jason told me you transferred schools." She says this with a frown. "He was so upset; he wouldn't talk much last break, only went out to see Piper but her never seemed to enjoy himself."

This is news to me. I knew he would have been sad but not to the point that he'd lock himself in his room.

"Even Thalia failed at getting through to him" Thalia, his older sister that he's really close with couldn't even get him to talk? That's really difficult to imagine, because even though through looks they look like night and day, literally, with Jason's golden hair and sunny personality and Thalia's dark aura, they still spend as much time together as they can. When we weren't hanging out, he was with his sister.

I'm still pondering over this when the toaster goes off. Mrs. Grace hands me a tray with both plates, a pitcher of juice and two glasses. "Here you go, Percy. It's glad to have you here. Hopefully Jason will cheer up some. He hasn't been the same since you left." Then she sends me off back to Jason's room.

I set the tray down on his desk and take a seat on his chair. He's still asleep, curled up in a ball, but at least he's turned in his sleep now so his back isn't to me. It doesn't seem like his sleep is peaceful though. His eyebrows are knitted together and his lips are turned down.

I'm trying to remember everything he said last night. He said something about all the shit he put me through. I don't really find that surprising. Annabeth told me how she thinks Jason might have figured it out, that I left because of him. What surprised me though was finding out Jason and Piper broke up. They were really happy last I saw them. I can't possibly imagine what must have happened for them to break up.

But then Annabeth said Jason was in love with someone else, which doesn't make sense. How could he have fallen for someone else so fast when he was in la la land with Piper? Did something happen to them that Jason felt was lacking and found in someone else? It just doesn't add up. Jason is loyal to the core; he would never do that.

My phone pings all of a sudden.

7:36am From Luke: Hey! You didn't come home last night? Is your friend alright?

7:37am From Percy: I don't know, he still hasn't talked to me about anything. Anyway, I'll see you later.

7:37am From Luke: You don't have to rush if you're still having problems with Jason. You guys should mend the fence.

7:38am From Percy: But you're leaving already.

7:39am From Luke: And I'll see you before we head back to campus. You're still coming over, right? Dad wants to see you.

7:40am From Percy: Yeah, of course. I haven't seen Uncle Hermes since, what? Since I was 8 I think when mom and me visited.

7:41am From Luke: Yeah, way too long ago. Anyway, see you or not later, good luck with Jason. Hope you guys set things right.

7:41am From Percy: Thanks, cous.

I didn't realize Jason already woke up. But he's not looking at me. He's looking at the phone in my hand. "Hey, sorry if my phone woke you. Luke was just asking where I was." And just like that I can see his face shutting down. "Your mom made breakfast. I asked if we could eat up here." The only response I get from him though is him shifting onto his back and looking up at the ceiling. "Man, come on. Your god awful scrambled eggs are waiting." I try to make light of the situation, but get nothing. "Please eat something, Jace."

He finally sits up and I bring him his plate and a glass of juice. I go back to his desk though. It looks like he might need some space now.

After what feels like an eternity of awkward silence, we finally finish our meal and I break it. "So, now can we talk about what happened last night?"

Jason doesn't give anything away that he's even heard me. This is getting to be really ridiculous now. "You said something about putting me through things last night. I want to talk about that." Jason is still sitting still on his bed, while looking down at the empty plate on his lap. "You don't have to say anything but I guess now is the right time to get this off my chest." I take a breath. "I'm gay." He's still stoic. "I found out when I was in high school." Still nothing. Well, here goes. "I found out because of you."

The first indication that Jason has been listening is his shoulders sagging even more. I didn't really expect that. I thought he'd tense up. "I was so in love with you and I didn't know how to tell you that without ruining our friendship." At this I finally pull my eyes away from him. I thought I was totally ready to tell him everything, but it's still a little difficult. I've been keeping this from him for so long. "You never showed anything that inclined you were homophobic or anything, but it was still a risk I wasn't willing to take. By the time we were in university, I was so ready to tell you. But then Piper happened and you were so happy. And it just got to the point that I couldn't take it anymore. It was one more year of seeing the guy I was so in love with being so happy for someone else. I just, I had to go. I'm sorry for how I left. I didn't mean to hide it from you. I just knew that if I told you, you'd find a way to let me stay and I couldn't let you do that. I needed time away to sort out my feelings, you know?"

I finally look back at him and see silent tears pouring down his face. I quickly scramble to get to his side. "Hey, why are you crying? I'm sorry, what did I do?"

I wrap my arm around his shoulders, trying my best to comfort him as much as I can. It takes a while but finally his breathing isn't as erratic. But he shrugs out of my hold. He looks me dead in the eye. His once clear blue eyes are now dull and lifeless, red rimmed with tears. "Are you happy?"

That takes me off guard. "What?"

"I want to know if you're happy now. If it's better now that you're going to JU?"

He asks this with little to no emotion. Nothing at all like the passionate Jason Grace I left at OU.

"Well, the classes are better. We go out to immersions every other week which is way more than I ever got back in OU."

"But are you happy?"

Was I? The distance was good, that's for sure. I've come to accept that Jason is straight and you can't force someone to love you. But was I happier without him, no. I missed him so much. I had to stop myself multiple times from reaching out to him. It hurt, but I also knew I needed to give myself some time to move on.

It doesn't hurt like it used to now, though. So, I guess you can say that I am happy, but not happier. I tell him instead, a simple, "Yeah."

He closes his eyes but not before a few tears leak out. I move to wipe them off, then he nuzzles his cheek into my hand. A small smile graces his face, but his eyes still look dull. He pulls away from my hand. I can see his smile trembling but that doesn't deter him. "I'm happy for you." Is all he says before he completely shuts down. What little spark was left is completely gone, and it hurts so much to see.

"Jase? Come on, we still have to talk about what happened to you last night."

He moves to get out of bed, every movement robotic. He puts the dishes on the tray, goes to pick up things on the floor that got jostled from last night scream fest, completely ignoring me.

I grab his arm, "Jason, stop." He looks at me with lifeless eyes and an empty smile. "Come on, talk to me."

"I was just having a rough night last night. Thank you for your concern though." God, even how he speaks now sounds robotic.

"Was it because of the break up?"

"Yes."

"Well? Care to elaborate?"

"No."

God, he's infuriating. But at least his responding. "Do you miss her?"

"No."

"Are you in love with someone else like she said?"

This question makes him pause, but only for a second. "Yes."

My eyes widen at that. "Is she why you and Piper broke up?"

"No."

"What? I thought you guys broke up because you found someone else."

"Yes."

"Goddamit, Grace! You're not making any sense!"

He just goes back to tidying his already tidy room.

"Are you going to pursue her?"

The first anti-robotic reaction I get is his shoulder sagging, but only for a moment. He immediately straightens up. "No."

"Why not?"

He just shrugs in response. God this is getting old. "Is she why you've been crying so hard? I don't understand."

"There's nothing to understand."

I can't take this anymore. "I swear to god, Jace. Just tell me what's going on!"

"Will you finally leave if I do?" He says this so coldly that it hurts. But I need for him to talk about it so I brush it aside.

"Yes, now tell me what's been hurting you."

Jason faces me, all hard lines and stiff posture, a completely blank face. "This person deserves someone who wouldn't hurt them. Someone who will make them happy. Someone who isn't me. It hurt, because I missed my chance. But it's okay now. They don't need me barging in on them, and I don't want to be selfish. Now, please. Leave." I'm too shocked by what he said because it sounded a little like how I felt about him before, that he easily pushes me out of his bedroom. By the time my brain has caught up, he's already locked the door. I don't want to make a scene in his own home, so I bound down the stairs and do what he said. I leave.

"Hey, I didn't expect you back so soon." Luke greets me when I enter the door. He must see how dejected I look because the next thing he says is, "It didn't go so well, did it?"

I plop myself down on the couch, "I…I don't know?" Luke takes a seat next to me. "He wasn't mad or upset. I already expected that he knew, but when I told him he started crying. I couldn't understand! Was it so upsetting for him to know that I love him?"

"I really don't know Jason except for all the things you told me about him. But last night, he looked so crushed out on the street. You said he broke up with his girl, did that have anything to do with it?"

"I don't really know. He said he found someone else but she wasn't available, I guess." I take a deep breath. "You know what? I don't want to talk about it right now. What time are you leaving?"

"In an hour or so. I don't want to get home too late. I already packed my stuff last night."

"Where's mom?"

"Right here, hon." Mom enters the living room with damp hair. "I was about to head out, I have to meet my publisher today. Where's Jason? I expected him to come with you like he usually did."

"He's having a bad day." Is all I say.

"Oh, you should bring him cookies. I made some last night."

"Blue?" I can't help the excitement in my voice.

My mom just laughs, "Of course, they're blue. What else would they be?" She winks at me while she puts on her shoes. "Well, I have to go. Be safe, Luke. Tell your dad I miss him."

"Will do, and thanks again Aunt Sally for letting me crash. It's been so long since our families last got together."

"Anytime. It was so nice hearing that Percy got see a familiar face over there. Being so far away and all, I was a little worried."

"Don't worry, I can handle this little squirt." All of a sudden he tackles me and put me in a headlock.

Mom just laughs it off with a, "Play nice boys." And is out the door.

I finally get out of Luke's grip and head for the kitchen. Blue cookies are calling for me.

"So, are you coming with me to the bus stop later?" Luke follows me into the kitchen then grabs the cookie out of my hand. I swear, he's like the big brother I never wanted.

"I don't think so. I'm exhausted. We didn't get to sleep until really late last night, and it was pretty restless. I even woke up before Jason. Shit like that isn't normal."

He chuckles and proceeds to grab two glasses of milk for us. "I figured. Want me to warm up your milk? Might help you sleep."

"That would be great. Thanks."

We chat a bit more until half the cookies are gone. I made sure to leave enough so I can bring them over tomorrow at Jason's. He might have wanted me to leave but I'm stubborn. I'm going to make him break out of whatever shit he's going through. I already missed a whole semester with him and what a mess that has been. I still have a few more weeks until I leave to visit Uncle Hermes. Hopefully that's enough time to catch up with him.

When Luke notices my drooping eyes he announces that he best be going now so I can catch up on some sleep.

"Text me when you're leaving. I'll pick you up when you get there. Dad and the twins are really excited."

"Me, too. Mom told me all the stories Uncle Hermes shared about Connor and Travis always getting in trouble."

"Don't you go and add to that now." Luke laughs and reaches for me for a hug. "See you soon, squirt. I really hope you and Jason figure things out. You guys have something special."

"Why'd you say that?"

"Just a gut feeling. You know how good at I am at reading people. And last night, for a split second I saw something in his eyes when he looked at you."

"I…don't know what you mean." I give out an involuntary yawn.

"Come on, get to bed. I'll see you soon. Bye, Perce!"

"Bye, Luke! Be safe."

And with that he's out the door and I head to my very missed bed. I don't give what Luke said a second thought, because as soon as my head hit the pillow, I'm out like a light.

I don't know how much time has passed but the sun looks low in the sky so I'm assuming it's already late afternoon. I grab my phone to see a few texts from Luke.

9:46am From Luke: Hey, I'm at the bus station. Just waiting until boarding.

9:57am From Luke: I think I see Jason here

9:59am From Luke: Yep, definitely Jason. I don't see what bus he's waiting for though. Was he supposed to leave today?

10:00am From Luke: Damn, that boy looks so lost. Well, we're boarding. See you soon!

I barely finish reading that last text. He left?! It's almost 4, that was 6 hours ago!

I dash around my room, change clothes and grab the plate of cookies before I head for the door. Luke might be wrong. Jason might still be at his place. No need to worry. Well, that's what I tell myself as I walk as briskly as I can with a plate full of cookies in my hand.

When I arrive, Mrs. Grace greets me at the door. "Oh, Percy."

"Hi, Mrs. Grace. I brought cookies for Jason." I try not to fidget so much.

"Oh, Jason left, dear. He said he had a lot to prepare for since its his last year and all." A small frown graces her face. "Such a shame. He looked really down this morning. I thought seeing you would have helped."

"Uhm, what do you mean?"

"Oh, that silly boy. Falling all over that Piper girl when we could all clearly see he was head over heels for you. We didn't want to say anything because we wanted him to figure it out on his own."

I almost drop the plate in my hand. Mrs. Grace sees my stumble and invites me in. "Come, dear. You look like a deer up in headlights."

She leads me to the family room to sit and dashes off to the kitchen with the cookies. When she comes back she has a glass of water with her. "Here you go, dear. It looks like you need it."

"Uhm, I think you have it wrong Mrs. Grace. Jason doesn't have a thing for me."

"Oh, I beg to differ. He was all over you in high school. Wouldn't shut up about you. Even when he met that girl, he would talk about you non-stop to me and his father. Thalia threatened him once to shut up when he bragged about your swimming. Trust me, dear, he cares a whole lot about you."

"But…that doesn't make any sense!"

"Of course, it does. Broke his heart too when he found out you left and found someone new. Before we left we had a little chat. To be honest, he left because he wanted to be alone for a while. It didn't seem healthy but he insisted. He has his father's eyes, never could say no to them."

I'm still here trying to process everything being said to me. Mrs. Grace keeps on going, though. "Took him long enough. Oh well, my little boy is growing up. Part of that is the occasional heartbreak I suppose. He really did seem happy for you though. Right before he left he told me that whatever else happens between you two, if you can salvage the friendship after he heals or not, he's just happy to know that you're happy. And don't worry. He's not mad or anything with you. If anything, he's angry at himself for realizing a little too late."

I can feel my mouth moving but nothing is coming out.

"You should really get home before it gets dark." With that she takes the still full glass from my hand and leads me out the door. Right before she closes it though, "Oh, Jason took the 10am bus back to campus earlier. I believe they have another bus going out tomorrow. Goodbye, Percy."

I have no idea how to process any of what Mrs. Grace said just now. She basically told me all this time that Jason has feelings for me. How is that even possible?

I walk back home trying to wrap my mind around the tiniest possibility that Jason likes me more than the bromance we've always had. When I arrive home, mom is sitting in the dining room with her laptop.

"Hey, hon! I saw the cookies all gone. I'm assuming you got back from Jason's. How is he? Is he feeling better?"

I take a seat across from her, still not totally believing the information dump from earlier. "He left."

My mom looks up from her laptop. "What do you mean?"

"His mom said he went back to campus this morning."

"Oh, that's too bad. His mom said he's been trying to find the nerve to talk to you for the past week."

"What now?" This is news to me. News that would have been helpful two weeks ago.

"Oh, I see Hera at the market all the time. Told me that his sweet boy's been pacing up and down that house."

"Did you know?" I can't help the slightly accusing tone that escapes me.

"Perseus, don't you use that tone with me." I slink a little lower in my chair. "And what do you mean? Did I know what?"

"That Jason apparently has feelings for me. That can't be right, right?"

She cocks her head at me like she can't figure me out. "I knew you were a little slow because of the dyslexia."

"Hey!"

"But I never realized how slow you can be. Percy, you know I love you, but please don't take offense. It was clear to almost everyone how much he cared about you, and you for him." She pauses as she thinks something over. "With that being said, Jason appears to be just as slow as you."

"Wha- Tha- I can't eve-" Forming a complete sentence has become a struggle. "But he had Piper! How can anyone say he has feeling for me when he was with her?"

"No one said anything out of respect, Percy. But even so, anyone could clearly see how much you mean to him even when he was with her. Whenever you boys went home for break, you two were inseparable. And based from all your stories, you two were always together back in uni. You both have always been there for each other."

I'm silent for a long while. This is the second time today someone, our mothers no less, has pointed out to me what my hurt heart wouldn't let me see before.

My mom waits patiently for me to process all this, or to say something. "I think, I think have some packing to do."

I stand up but my mom reaches for me, "Be careful okay, text me if you're still going to visit Hermes and the boys before going back to JU." Then she kisses my cheek and gives me a slight shove.

Good thing I always reserve a room every time after school year at the dorms. Before, it was to secure a room that both me and Percy will stay at. Now it's just become habit, something I'm thankful for. I don't know if Frank will be assigned as my roommate again this year, but whoever it is isn't here yet. The campus is quiet though. There's still summer classes, but it's the first time I've been back this early. I'm used to the hustle and bustle of students registering for the new semester. It's still a few weeks too early.

I know it's cowardly of me to run away. But our hometown is small. It's a shock I didn't run into Percy earlier. Well, not really, since I refused to leave the house. But even then, I couldn't take the fact that Percy was just a few minutes away…with someone else.

I don't even know how to feel anymore. Everything still hurts like hell. It's like the emotional pain is transferring into physical pain. I can literally feel my chest tighten whenever I see them together in my head. But other than that, I feel numb. I have no idea what to do now. It's like I've been stripped away of who I am and left raw. It's not like I can't function without Percy. I've done it since he left. But I never felt like I was truly living, not like when he was still here.

It's okay, though. He's happy now. That's all I'll ever want. And knowing that at least he has someone to take care of him when I can't, someone who will pay enough attention to know something's wrong, well, it's enough. It has to be.

It's not dark out yet, but I feel exhausted. After placing new bed sheets, I don't bother unpacking. I land face first on my bed, not give a fuck about the endless tears running down my face and go to sleep.

When I wake up several times. I don't bother getting up though. I know I skipped lunch, and it's a good assumption that dinner time has come and gone, but I can't find enough energy in me to grab something to eat. I get up once to use the toilet but that's pretty much it.

I drift in and out of sleep evert few hours. Blink, it's still dark out. Blink, the sky is turning pink. Blink, it's way too bright. Blink, there's a knock on the door. Who would even be here? I don't think anyone knows I'm here so they might have gotten the room number wrong. I'm too exhausted to care. If my new roommate is early like I am, then he should have a key.

I keep my eyes closed, hoping to just go back to sleep. I hear the door opening. New roommate then. But all of a sudden my blanket is ripped off of me. I'm still too exhausted to care. It could have been a college ax murderer for all I know, I'm still staying in this bed.

"Jason Grace." I should really eat something, I'm hearing things. "Jason fucking Grace get up." But maybe then I'd stop hearing his voice. "I will literally drag you off if you don't get up. Right. Now." I don't even deserve loving words in my hallucinations. All for the best I suppose, so I wouldn't get my hopes up. "Okay, you fucking asked for it."

My eyes snap open as soon as I feel warm hands grabbing for my feet. Next thing I know I'm on the floor. Percy is standing there, my blanket at his feet.

"What is wrong with you?" He's yelling, and I'm too stunned to even begin answering that. I must be going crazy. Yeah, I definitely need to go grab something to eat.

"You know, I went to your house yesterday. I even brought you cookies my mom made that I know you love so much even though you freaked out the first time you saw them 'cause they were blue. And what don't I find?" Okay, not hallucinating, I think. "You. You left."

I sit up, and lean against the bed. My body feels like it got run over by a truck. Percy is a little blurry because I don't have my glasses on, so I'm still not totally convinced he's real. Why would he be here?

"And you know what else? I had a chat with your mom."

No, no, no. Okay this is definitely real.

"Do you have something that you want to tell me, Grace?"

This wasn't supposed to happen. I left with my tail tucked between my legs to lick my wounds and let him be. No, I will stand by what I did back home.

I purposely give him a blank face. "What are you doing here, Percy?"

He looks at me like I'm stupid for not knowing. "I told you my life secret last night! And all you did was kick me out. Why won't you talk to me?"

I get up on shaky legs. I almost stumble but catch myself at the last minute when I see him reaching out to catch me. I don't deserve his touch. "There's nothing to talk about." I grab the blanket, avoiding his legs at all costs. I plop back down on the bed but before I could lay back down he grabs my face.

"Don't. Please don't shut me out. I need to know." I try to pull back but his fingers are linked at the back of my neck, his thumbs caressing my cheeks. "Please, Jace. Your mom told me, heck even my mom told me. Now I need you to tell me."

Percy, please. Don't.

"Do you have any sort of feelings for me?"

I break.

"I'm sorry." It comes out as a whisper as my tears are crashing down once more. I close my eyes. I can't look at the pity I'm sure to find on his face. "I'm sorry for hurting you. I'm sorry I never noticed before. I'm sorry for flaunting Piper in your face. I'm sorry for driving you away. I'm sorry I was too late. I'm sorry for realizing it when you were already gone. You don't deserve this." That's the last thing I can get out before the sobbing gets too much and no words are leaving my mouth, just loud ugly heaves.

Percy pulls me closer and crushes me to his chest. No, don't. I don't deserve to be in your arms. I don't want to hurt you anymore. He keeps me there though. My tears are soaking though his shirt but he doesn't seem to care. He's holding me in a tight, strong grip, but at the same time it feels gentle.

"You don't have to be sorry. It wasn't your fault. I didn't want you to know. Please, I don't want you blaming yourself."

But I do blame myself. So I gather as much strength left in me and push away. He doesn't let me get far though. "Jason, look at me." I do, he's still blurry though. Percy must notice my unfocused gaze and reaches for my glasses that I use on occasion. Now that he's a little clearer, tears are still gathered in my eyes, I see no pity at all, just a warm smile. "Please, I need to hear it from you."

Maybe he needs this to be the last nail in the coffin. If I tell him now, and it doesn't stir anything inside him, it would be a definite sign that he's completely moved on. It hurts, but if that's what I have to do, then alright. Anything for him. But before that…

"Why does it matter? What about Luke?"

His eyebrows pinch. Why do you have to be so damn cute? "What about Luke? Wait wait, how do you even know Luke?"

I bow my head, feeling ashamed all of a sudden. "I kinda, sorta, saw your photo together. That's when I started realizing. I didn't like seeing you with someone else, but it's okay now." I give him the most honest smile I can muster, even if it is small. "You're happy and that's all that matters."

Percy pulls back a bit and does a T with his hands. "Okay, time out. You think me and Luke are together?" I shrug my shoulder and reach for my blanket again. But Percy's words stop me. "So that's what your mom meant when she said I found someone else. You, idiot. Luke is my cousin!"

My head snaps so fast that I get dizzy. Percy quickly sits by my side on the bed and holds the side of my face again. He doesn't say anything, giving me the chance to process what he just said. Cousin. "But…but you were holding hands! That's not what cousins do."

"Holding hands? What?"

"In one of his photos. I might have…stalked his profile some. And it was definitely you!"

He chuckles at me, "I'm insulted, Grace. You definitely can't tell swimmers apart." He lets go of my face but reaches for my hands in my lap, urging me to face him. "I think I know what photo you're talking about. That was Ethan, Luke's boyfriend. That's how we got back together actually. The varsity was practicing, it was a little late to join but they were open to other people joining their training as long as they catch up. Luke was there to pick Ethan up. It's been so long since we last saw each other but we had great fun as kids before they moved away. That's why I posted that photo. I was so excited to have my cousin with me."

So Percy wasn't with someone else. I flicker of hope lights up but I blow it out quickly. I still hurt him. He may very well have moved on.

"Jason, I wasn't totally honest with you last night. You asked me if I was happy. Well, I am. The distance was good. It gave me a better perspective on how I feel about you. I never stopped loving you. I grew to accept that you wouldn't be mine, but it gave me a chance to let you go. But now, please tell me. I don't want to ever let you go if there was even a sliver of a chance."

"But…how can you possibly still love me?" My chin is quivering again.

"Because it wasn't your fault I got hurt. I didn't have the guts to tell you. And with everything that happened between you and Piper, we were always still there for each other. You calm my hyper activeness. I pull you out from your dull moods. We balance each other out."

I can't wrap my mind around this. This time, the tears that leaking are from pure joy. I pull Percy to me in a bone crushing hug. I'm here crying and he's laughing, hugging me just as hard.

"You still haven't told me, you know." His voice is teasing and it gives me the courage to finally tell him.

I pull back from our embrace. "Perseus Jackson," he's looking at me like I'm the most precious thing in the world. My heart swells. "You were my first friend since the move back in high school. We'd meet at the locker room after practice. We'd go out for dinner or a café. We'd see movies together that we think the other would like. You've been my ray of sunshine when I get down. You always make me smile. I've always wondered how someone could have such amazing eyes like you. A mix of blues and greens, like the ocean. My ocean, wild and carefree and pulls you in when you least expect it. I've been an idiot for so long. And this idiot is so deeply in love with you."

"I love you too, idiot." And just like that, all the hurt we've been though, doesn't matter anymore. All the drama, and the secrets. What matters now is that I have the boy I love in front of me, holding my hands for dear life, and sure as hell I am never letting him go.

"Can I kiss you?" God how much I want to know how soft his lips are.

Percy chuckles, "Took you long enough." And he grabs my head and locks are lips together.

This. This right here, is why it's okay to hurt sometimes. No matter what the hurtle, Percy Jackson is always worth it. And I am going to work my damn hardest to show him every day.

We spent as much time as we possibly could together. We went back home the next day after we went to the ever favored Italian restaurant. Our first official date. There were no awkward silences, no fidgeting. Just tender hand holding and chaste kisses and of course the occasional Percy jokes. It was perfect.

He still had to leave a little earlier to visit his Uncle and cousins. He was still going to JU. It was our last year after all, and he's learning a lot more there. It would have been a waste to go back to OU.

There was a lot of late night phone calls, adjusting to the mildly different time zones, skype dates. But it was all worth it. What we have couldn't be deterred by distance. What we have is real.

It's been a long year, but it felt like no time at all. Graduation had come and gone. We couldn't be there for each other's ceremonies because they were too close together. But that's okay. What's important now is that he's on a plane and I'm here with a gold band in my pocket.

A promise that I will forever keep him in my heart.

A/N:

And that's all folks! It was so difficult for me finish this. I had such writer's block. I didn't know how to end it well. I hope I did it justice.

Feel free to tell me some prompts you'd like for me to write! Anything is welcome.

And lastly, thank you for finding the time to read this. This means so much to me. I really do hope you enjoy.