PART I – Resolution

Chapter I – The sheep among the wolves

"The only honorable, desirable kind of fear that shouldn't be feared is the fear of harm on a loved one. It's the kind of fear that leads to self-sacrifice and the kind of fear where you would truly jump in front of a bus to save another."

― Criss Jami, Diotima, Battery, Electric Personality

How far would you go for the sake of your family? For your mother? For your brother? Would you fight for them? Would you put your life on the line to protect them? I feel very sad for people who didn't have the chance to be born into a loving family which they can trust and love with all their heart because I believe that such a family often becomes your pillar. If you're sad, they will console you, if you're scared, they will force you to face your fears, if you fall, they will laugh at you but help you up in the end. And if you were to disappear, they would go on a rampage through the whole world to find you.

"Welcome, gentlemen," the instructor declaimed, "to this country's best military academy, The Royal Military College. Each and everyone of you had to take multiple tests during those last two months and I'm proud to tell you that you were accepted into the formation. Congratulations, men, and welcome to the 156th Training Brigade."

The recruits saluted simultaneously. This ceremony was the reward for their hard work and success at passing the army's tests. The formation would last two years, at the end of which they would receive the medal corresponding to their officer rank and chose their corps. The Royal Military College was the most renowned academy of the country, maybe even the best on the continent. The officers that got out of the academy with their degree were immediately offered ranks of high responsibilities and some even got to work in collaboration with the Chief of State. But the academy was founded a few centuries earlier and the traditional laws that were established at the time still remained. One of those laws stipulating clearly that only male students were allowed to apply to the formation. But here Lucy was, standing among the other recruits in the ranks with her acceptance letter in the pocket of her khaki uniform. Dressed as a man. Under the scorching sun, the air was stifling and the fabric of her uniform itched greatly as it stuck to her sweaty skin.

"During the two years you will spend at the College," the instructor went on, "we will teach you military history and the arts, how to fight, with weapons and barehanded, how to make up a strategy, a battle plan. We will test your abilities as soldiers, as leaders, your courage and values. You will be evaluated every month and those of you who cannot match our expectations will be thrown out. Half of you will drop out before the end of the first year."

He gestured to one of the soldiers that was standing next to him and the recruits were handed paper sheets.

"This is the program of the week," the instructor explained. "It will change at the start of each semester and you are to respect the schedule if you wish to attend classes, which I highly recommend for those of you who plan to make it out of here with their grade."

Standing beside and behind their instructor were three older men with stern faces and intense looks. One of them leaned in to whisper into the instructor's ear. During the few seconds that were needed for whatever the bulky, blonde man had to say to be said, Lucy observed the man that would be her commander for the next two years. He wasn't as tall as the men that were standing by his side, but was still taller than Lucy and most of the recruits. He was wearing a black tight tank top that showed off his toned arms and slim waist along with military camouflage pants and combat boots made of shined black leather. That much was normal for a soldier, but what was a bit surprising was the white scaly scarf wrapped loosely around his neck and the color of his hair. It was pink... Well, a dark shade of pink, to be fair, but still pink. The young woman snapped out of her distracted state of mind when said instructor turned his eyes back to them and straightened up.

"Lieutenant Dreyar here," the instructor started, "reminded me of a subject I had forgotten to talk about. Well, to be honest, looking at you I just thought it was useless to mention it, but I guess even you girlies have the right to know."

What a charming man...

"At the end of your instruction," he explained, "a ranking will be established with your scores. Those of you who get more than two thousand points will be allowed to apply for the Elite Squad but you will get more explanations during your Military History Class. Only ten positions are available for the Squad."

Lucy gulped. This was it. The Elite Squad. Her ultimate goal. She was so close now, she only had to withstand two years in the academy, and she would have all the cards in hands. She was bringing her father home, no matter what.

"This is it for now," the instructor declared. "Those gentlemen will show you to your rooms. I want to see you all at 7 p.m. at the refectory, you have three hours to settle in. My name's Natsu Dragneer but you will call me commander. Any question? No? Good. You may get lost."

The campus was huge and Lucy was surprised to see some girls in a building situated away from the main block. Lieutenant Dreyar explained them that this building and the one behind it were reserved for the girls that aspired to become military nurses and that this was a forbidden area for them.

"I'm serious," he growled, "if we catch one of you in there..."

He never clearly told them what would happen in that case, but it wasn't very difficult to guess. The dorms were very large and very white. The walls were white, the floor was white, the ceiling was white and the uniforms of the residents were white.

"Each room contained two beds, two wardrobes, two tables and chairs and an affiliated bathroom," Lieutenant Dreyar explained as they walked along the corridors.

"I will now give you your keys and let you go put your stuff in your respective rooms. Room 111: Alzack Connell and Elfman Strauss, room 112: Gray Fullbuster and Warren Rocko, room 113: Vijeeter Ecor and Max Alors."

This went on for a while and each pair that was being called would walk to take a key from the Lieutenant's hand before leaving to find their room. A lot of recruits were disappointed when they were not sharing a room with a friend, but they were still some that looked like middle schoolers on a field trip, like those two: Jet and Droy.

"I don't care if you're happy or not," the lieutenant growled, "keep it down. Room 134: Loke Shishikyū and Luc Hear... Luc."

Lucy internally sighed in relief and thanked the lieutenant from the bottom of her heart. She was hiding her true gender from everybody, but she had had to give her real surname when applying for the academy. Heartfilia, the name of the traitor. Her life at the academy would be hellish if her comrades were to hear about her name. A boy with ginger hair and a very playful smile took one of the two keys that the lieutenant was holding and Lucy took the second one. The room was bigger than she had expected, but just as white as anticipated. She put her large bag at the feet of her bed and immediately started to make the bed with the sheets that had been provided. Loke laughed when he saw her working on her bed and took out his own sheets from his bag.

"It's fine if you're okay with those depressing things, but I'm putting my own sheets on," he said with a cheery voice.

His bedding set was colored with caramel and gold and decorated with cute little lions. He glanced at the small clock in the room when he was done and sighed.

"It's already this late," he whined. "Too bad, I wanted to talk with you for a bit, but I have to call my girlfriends. See ya!"

Lucy watched him leave the room with a frown. Girlfriends? Well, it was none of her business. At least, the guy looked nice enough and it's not like she was in any danger with her current appearance. She sat on her bed when she was done putting her belongings in the wardrobe and let her eyes fix themselves on Loke's bedding set. It really was much cuter and felt much warmer than her own military set, but she didn't have anything else. She hesitated. She had her Plue plush in her bag and it definitely would help her feel comfortable if she could sleep with it, but a soldier wasn't exactly supposed to cuddle a plush to fall asleep. What would her roommate think? In the end she let the plush in the bag and left to go in search of the refectory. She finally managed to find it thanks to very loud bunch that was heading there too. Once inside, she quickly noted that everyone was free to sit wherever they wanted in this happy and noisy bunch, there was no table for the new recruits. She stood in a side of the place for a moment, searching for a seat, when she heard someone call her, well him.

"Hey Luc! Here!"

Loke was sitting with a group of new recruits and instructors, he had kept her a chair next to him. She smiled and headed there, the guy really was nice. Loke's arm went to rest on her shoulders when she sat down and she had to resist the urge to push him.

"I thought you'd want to eat with us since you don't know anyone else," he smiled. "So, here with the cold face is Gray, he's an ass, but kind of cool too."

The boy in question didn't look offended in the slightest and Loke went on.

"This guy that looks like a gang member is Gajeel. Next to him is Alzack which is possibly even quieter than you. The huge guy with white hair is Elfman and next to him are our beloved instructors."

Natsu Dragneel and Lieutenant Dreyar were there as well as two others, a redhead that looked as redoubtable as kind and a small old man with grey hair that really didn't fit in the military setting.

"Guys, this is Luc," Loke cheered, "my roommate."

They nodded to her.

"Hi Luc."

"Yeah."

"Another real man!"

The old petite instructor greeted her as well as the redhead, but their commander and the lieutenant ignored everyone and everything that wasn't their meal.

"It's nice to meet you," Lucy answered.

The guys sitting with her suddenly looked a bit surprised and even the commander discreetly eyed her from his seat. Loke just smirked.

"What?" she asked.

"Nothing," her roommate beamed, "it's just that your voice is so light, it's cute."

Light? She had made sure to talk with a deeper voice than usual, though... She needed to be more careful.

"Don't call me cute," she countered coldly.

Loke laughed wholeheartedly and petted her head.

"You don't like it?" he giggled. "Fine, I won't do it anymore."

This guy was just way too easy going. The commander's eyes went back to his food and Lucy internally sighed. She couldn't have her identity exposed when she was so close to her aim. They were already too many people in on the secret.

Before going through the tests to integrate the academy, each recruit had to undergo a medical examination with one of the academy's doctors. Fortunately, one of the doctors in charge of the examinations was her childhood friend and the blonde managed to catch her attention while the recruits were sitting in the waiting room. The doctor's name was Erza Scarlet and her face when she recognised Lucy had been hilarious. Erza had called for her and locked the door behind her. It had been then that Lucy had exposed her crazy plan to the redhead and asked for her help.

"You..." Erza had trailed. "You do realize that failure means death, right?"

Lucy had nodded. She was aware that she wasn't just going to get thrown out if she was found out. But surprisingly it was still the safest plan she had formed. Erza had agreed to help her and it was the best support Lucy could have asked for. But even Erza wouldn't be able to save her if her instructors were to discover who she was. Of course, they wouldn't hurt her or anything but they would report her to the headquarter, probably not knowing that it would be the same as killing her.

"And that would make her the seventeenth," Loke laughed. "What about you, Luc?"

"What?"

Damn, she hadn't listened to anything he had said.

"We were talking about our civil life," he smiled kindly. "Did you leave your other half to come here?"

Oh. Just normal boy talk, then? Good.

"No... did you say you had seventeen girlfriends?"

"This guy is a pervert," Gray said. "Even you should be careful, there are no girls around so he might attack you."

"I'm hurt," Loke said, not looking hurt in the slightest. "There's no way I would do anything potentially harmful to my best buddy."

"I'd kick his ass if he tried," Lucy added.

Everyone laughed at this and started to joke and tease Loke, but someone's intervention killed the mood.

"As if you could," the commander retorted, not even looking away from his meal. "You're small and you look as weak as a child, this guy would break your bones with just a few punches."

He got up and picked his tray with one hand in one swift movement.

"You'll be among the first ones to be thrown out," he affirmed, finally deigning to look at her with cold, disdainful eyes.

The little old man shook his head and sighed and the lieutenant didn't react to his speech, but the man with red head seemed to be having fun. Just before leaving, the pink haired bast... instructor sent her a glare and ended his contemptuous speech.

"Also, you guys are too loud. This is not a summer camp, start behaving like soldiers if you want to valid at least the first semester."

And with that, he left. Indeed, what a charming man. In the heavy silence that followed, a snicker was heard from the seat next to her and she turned her head to see Loke staring at the commander's back.

"Man," he sighed, "I already love the guy."

Curfew was at ten and Lucy and Loke chose to wait for it in their room. They didn't talk about their family, Loke seemed to be as secretive about it as she was, but did talk about their friends, previous jobs, studies and whatnot. But in the end, they never talked about their reasons for coming to the academy nor did they talk about really private matters. Lucy deduced that she wasn't the only one hiding things from their instructors and comrades, but she doubted that Loke's secrets were as unbelievable as hers.

At half past three the following morning, Lucy's alarm rang in the room and woke her and Loke up with a start.

"What the hell are you doing?" Loke groaned, his cheerfulness totally gone. "It's not time to get up yet, turn this shit off."

Lucy did, but still got up. She needed more preparation than her male roommate and didn't want to risk him seeing her getting undressed, for various reasons. She put on a Pressurizing Hemostatic Elasticity Bandage to hide her chest when she got out of the shower and put her khaki uniform on before staring into the mirror. It still felt strange to see her hair being so short when it was always so long... She was ready to go when Loke finally crawled out of bed and dragged his feet toward the bathroom.

"How can you be up and ready this early in the morning," he asked her tiredly, "you alien."

He was dashing when he got out of the bathroom. They were in the refectory a few minutes later and found that none of their friends from the previous day had arrived yet.

"This is what happens when you set the alarm at three," Loke complained.

"Didn't you hear our beloved commander yesterday? We have to start acting like soldiers."

Loke snickered.

"What an obedient child you are, even though he was so mean to you. Do you actually like to be maltreated? That's why you don't have a girlfriend?"

"Shut up, Loke."

They got to their table only to find that the commander was already there. No one else was sitting at his table this time.

"I think we can get a table near the..."

"I want to sit here," Lucy interrupted.

Loke smirked when he saw her walk toward the instructor's table and followed her as she sat right in front of Natsu. Loke sat next to her and kept on smiling as his new crazy friend tried to converse with the cold commander.

"Good day to you," she greeted him.

"Yeah."

Lucy didn't let his very short and very unconcerned answer discourage her.

"You look young to be a commander," she mused out loud, "how come you rose in rank so quickly?"

The commander finally lifted his head to look her in the eyes. He didn't look amused at all.

"What in the world makes you think you can talk to me?"

His voice was icy and the muscles of his jaw contracted. Why did he hate her so much when he didn't even know who she was? Lucy got annoyed.

"Sorry," she smiled, "it's probably because you look so affable."

She realized her mistake as soon as she made it, but it was too late now and she could only stare at him while he was glaring at her. It was strange how his face didn't really look menacing when he was glaring at her. He had a face of marble that didn't give any emotion away. But his eyes were another story. He had fire raging in his eyes and his fierce look was just so intimidating it almost paralyzed you. She didn't dare speak and fortunately didn't have to as Loke saved her.

"Hey, Gray!" he called. "Here!"

Natsu got up and left as the group of recruits came to sit at the table. He sent Lucy a last pointed look and turned to leave the refectory.

"Pfft," Loke laughed, "you have a few screws loose, kid."

Loke then proceeded to tell their friends about her idiotic earlier actions and she thus became known as the daredevil of their little group.

"Didn't know you had that in you," Gray complimented.

"Luc's a man," Elfman seconded.

At seven in the morning, they were dressed in dark blue sweatsuits and were going through a session of muscle warm-up exercises before the start of the class strictly speaking. Their first class was hand to hand combat and their teacher would be their lovable commander.

"Alright," their instructor called, "pushups now: five series of twenty to start easy."

To start easy...

Natsu did pushups with them and even set the pace to encourage the recruits. He wasn't even sweating when they finished even though Lucy was panting and her whole body seemed to be on fire, especially her arms.

"You're slow," the commander deplored. "But at least you can do pushups properly. Get up, we're going to run laps around the academy."

"When does this class end?" Lucy asked Loke, her lungs burning.

"End?" he laughed. "This is still warm-up, kid. The real thing didn't even start yet."

Oh God.

Honestly, she didn't know how she managed to survive those warm-up exercises but she did. She was panting and sweating like a pig, but some of the guys actually had to give up before the start of the class so she figured she still could feel proud. No? Whatever.

"Choose a partner and make a circle around me," Natsu ordered. "We'll start with the real training."

Everyone obeyed quietly but quickly and waited for their instructor to give his instructions. Loke all but forced Lucy to team up with him and dragged her to stand right in front of their teacher.

"As officers," he explained, "you normally won't have to fight barehanded as you will lead squads on the field, but at war nothing happens exactly as expected so there are several situations that might require some skills. You won't have fun in this class, I will push you to your limits, both physically and mentally, you will hate me by the end of the semester and wish you could kill me if you're still here at the end of the year."

"No one would want to kill such a kind person," Lucy whispered to Loke.

Her friend snickered, but abruptly stopped. Her voice had barely been audible even for Loke so it was impossible that the instructor had heard her. But the commander turned his head at this very moment and his eyes immediately found hers. An almost invisible and very malicious side smirk slightly stretched his lips for just a second.

"I see that the little clown is energetic," he noted. "That's just perfect, come here."

Lucy gulped. She thought about declining the invitation, but knew deep down that it was impossible. If only the top 10 students were allowed to join the Elite Squad then she might as well fight against the tyrannical commander and gain some significant experience. And she didn't want him to know that he was intimidating her. She noticed that he was a good head taller than her when she was standing right in front of him.

"Show me your stance," he ordered.

Lucy hesitated, she didn't know what kind of stance she was supposed to take so she imitated the boxers. Her instructor crossed his arms and slowly moved around her to scrutinize her, his face expressionless.

"You have a precarious balance," he finally declared, "you're as unsteady as a newborn fawn. Your fists aren't positioned efficiently and you have no strength in the arms. You've never had to fight before, have you? You're as weak as a girl."

Lucy clenched her jaw. He was saying all that to piss her off and it would be his win if she said anything back. Even though she really did want to insult him...

"Try to throw a punch," he told her.

She frowned. What was she supposed to punch? There were no punching bag or punch shield anywhere. Natsu waited for a few seconds and lifted a brow.

"Well?" he pressed. "Do you need a User Manual?"

Some of the recruits snickered.

"Um," she hesitated, "you want me to punch you?"

"Do you enjoy making me repeat myself over and over again?"

Awesome, he was getting impatient again.

"Fine."

She took a step back and took his previous remarks into account to adjust her stance. Natsu didn't move an inch even when she threw a softened punch to his stomach. The commander suddenly grabbed her wrist and swept her legs in one swift movement.

"Going easy on me?" he mocked. "How kind."

He kneeled in front of her.

"You can't afford to go easy on someone with that amount of strength," he scolded. "I could have killed you just now."

He stood up and told her to do so too, but didn't offer her his hand.

"Punch me once more," he ordered. "This time, I'll hit you back."

Most of the recruits started to mumble furiously between them, hesitant about protesting. Loke frowned and took a step forward.

"Sir, that's too much..."

"Silence."

The commander didn't even bother looking at her friend.

"Shut up and watch. This will be a good lesson for all of you."

He kept his attention focused on his opponent and squared off for the fight. Lucy imitated his stance and he let a slight smirk appear on the corner of his mouth.

"Not as dumb as I thought," he breathed.

Lucy froze. Everything in his appearance looked dangerous, from the position of his body to the look on his face. He was born for this and at this moment, everything in him screamed of wildness and predation. The contraction of his muscles, the barely perceptible smirk on his face, everything about him was mesmerizing. He frowned when he realized something was wrong with her and the faint motion enabled her to come back to her senses. She didn't know what had caused this light trance, but couldn't allow herself to waste any time thinking about it. She threw a punch, this time aiming for his chin. He parried the blow with his left hand and hit her in the stomach with his right, not bothering to hold back his strength, though not using all of it either. She didn't moan or whimper, but took another cautious step back.

"Did it hurt?"

His smirk was gone, his eyes devoid of emotion.

"No."

"Good."

He pounced on her with clenched fists. Lucy had no doubt he would hit her for real this time and she knew that taking his punch would cause her too much damage. She then estimated that, if laying low was necessary for the sake of her mission, it wouldn't be of any help to her if she was too hurt to make any progress. The commander never said she had to fight like a boxer, only that she had to punch him. She grabbed his wrist when he tried to hit her and pulled on it to bring the man to the side. The sudden movement made him lose balance and she kicked his knee before throwing him to the floor and applied a grappling hold.

"Oh yeah."

She let go of his arm and gave him a very light punch, more of a caress, to the chin.

"My win."

Ok, now this is what really happened:

When she grabbed Natsu's wrist and pulled on it, he bent down, turned and seized her pants at the knee before pushing her to the ground. He was on her in the very next second, a knee on her chest and his forearm on her throat.

"Nice try," he breathed. "Still not offensive enough."

He let go of her and even grabbed her hand to help her up. He then turned to the other recruits and cleared his throat.

"This is what I will teach you today," he explained, "dodge and parry. Get yourself a partner, I will show you the movements."

Loke ran to his roommate and put his arm around her shoulders.

"You okay?" he asked concernedly. "He was a bit rough."

Lucy coughed and nodded.

"I'm fine," she assured. "Just a bit irritated, I really thought I could immobilize him with a Judo technique since he wasn't expecting it."

Loke laughed.

"He's from the Elite Squad, buddy. He was expecting it."

The rest of the day passed peacefully and the recruits had their first International Politics class and Strategy & Tactics of War class. The teacher of the first class was the instructor that had been sitting with them the day before, his name was Gildarts Clive. Each class lasted for two hours and Lucy hoped the upcoming ones would be different because their eccentric teacher spent the whole time talking about his wonderful daughter, that none of them were to touch or even approach if they wanted to live another day. The second class was taught by a fat, bald man dressed in pink and a bit too affectionate with the recruits that wanted his students to call him Bob. He certainly was an even more eccentric character than Clive but his lessons were clear and very interesting. As expected, Lucy was doing better when working with her brains than with her muscles, but she knew it was crucial for her to get stronger physically, both for her exams and for the personal mission she had.

Evening came fast and she quickly found herself standing in front of the mirror in the bathroom connected to her room, staring at the hematoma that was spread on the side of her stomach. Someone knocked on the bedroom door and Loke opened. Lucy heard him talk with someone before calling for her.

"Luc, I'm leaving for a while," he said. "The doctor's here to see you."

True to his words, he left right after and Lucy put her shirt on to hide the bandage in case the doctor wasn't Erza before opening the door. The redhead female doctor was alone in the bedroom, glaring at her.

"Hi, Erza," Lucy cheered.

"Sit, you moron."

Lucy quietly sat on the bed as her friend treated the wound on her stomach, occasionally flinching if it hurt.

"He really is a brute," Erza growled, "look at the mark he left... At least, he sent me here to check on you."

"He did?"

Lucy was surprised, she didn't think her instructor was the kind of man to care about mere recruits in training. And how did he know that she was hurt? She hadn't told anybody.

"I'm surprised too," Erza admitted, "but I'm glad he did. This is only the start, Lucy, it will get worse. It's not too late to give up and leave the academy."

"You know it's impossible..."

Erza groaned.

"No, I know you think it's impossible, but I'm sure there is another way. Your father wouldn't want you to take such risks for his sake."

A wry laugh escaped the blonde's lips.

"Erza, wouldn't you do the same for me?" she asked. "Or for Jellal?"

The redhead gritted her teeth. She was furious that her friend was hurt, that she was exposing herself to great dangers and most of all, she was furious at herself because she understood and yes, she would do the same in her place. She sighed.

"A colonel is coming to teach the new recruits starting tomorrow," Erza explained, "she's one of the few female officers of the army that are allowed into the academy and she's my friend. I will tell her about you and ask her to help you."

"I don't think it's..."

"Her name's Mirajane Strauss and I will tell her," Erza insisted, "it's not a question."

When seeing the worried look in her friend's eyes, though, the redhead calmed down and went on with a softened voice.

"Don't worry, she's just as trustworthy as I am," she assured. "I will support you with everything I have but she definitely will be of a great help."

Erza left soon after this meeting and Lucy had to admit that her presence was a great support for her. Even the redhead's friend's arrival wasn't bothering her anymore. Unbeknownst to both women, though, someone had been standing behind the door, in the corridor, and listening to their whole conversation.

End of chapter 1

The story will be divided into Parts which will each include several chapters. Any constructive review is more than welcome.