Chapter Three

Serena awoke that morning to hear the sound of the kettle boiling. The clock on the mantlepiece read 6am and she groaned at the idea of having to get up for work. She sat up from the sofa a little to see Bernie come into the living room, mugs of coffee in hand. She was already fully dressed in a white shirt and denim jeans, her hair wet from the shower.

"Good morning." Bernie passed her one of the mugs and took a seat in the nearby armchair.

Serena could only offer a half hearted grunt in response, still groggy from sleep. She sat up properly, shifting her legs so that her feet settled on the ground beneath her. "Did you sleep alright?"

"Best sleep I've had in months. Your bed is extremely comfortable." Bernie smiled. Serena noted that she looked much brighter than the previous day. "Did you sleep alright?"

Serena nodded, although she could feel her neck and shoulders were stiff. She sipped her coffee, noticing Bernie glance over her sleep-ruffled hair, make-up free face and silk black pyjama shirt and trousers. Serena could feel heat rise in her cheeks that she looked such a mess in front of her. She wasn't sure even Robbie had seen her like this.

"Do you mind if I make myself some toast?"

"No, not at all. I should get a shower." Serena excused herself from the living room, taking her coffee with her in the hope she'd be able to multitask dressing and consuming enough caffeine to properly wake herself up.

Work that day seemed to drag for Serena. She had been stuck in the office almost all day, fighting against a pile of ever increasing paperwork. Bernie had either been in theatre or on the ward and their paths had only crossed briefly at lunchtime when she had popped into the office to bring Serena a coffee.

A long, tired groan left Serena's lips as she finished what she hoped would be her last task of the day. It was gone 7pm and Jason had already got the bus home instead of waiting, saying he would sort his own dinner out and leave Bernie and Serena to do their own thing. Serena felt so proud of Jason, he had come on leaps and bounds since he had moved in with her. She hoped he might even be able to take on a more senior role in the hospital at some point.

Her thoughts were broken by the sound of the office door opening, in walking a very tired Bernie.

She slumped down in the chair next to Serena's desk, closing her eyes as her head hit the back of the wall. "Someone bring me a glass of wine, or better yet, a bottle." She sighed.

"I happen to know a place that serves a very good Shiraz…" Serena grinned.

"That sounds wonderful."

"Get your coat then, Major." Serena rose from her seat.

Albie's was busy but they found a small table in a corner away from the bustle. Bernie insisted she was paying and bought a bottle of Serena's favourite Shiraz. She took a seat opposite the brunette, pouring them both large glasses of the red liquid.

Conversation flowed between the two women as they discussed their work that day, performance of the people in their team and department budgets. Serena couldn't think of anyone better to lead AAU with - Bernie was sharp minded, fair and the most experienced surgeon she had ever worked with.

It was when Bernie returned to the table with their second bottle of wine that Serena found the courage to change the subject to matters closer to heart."Did you tell Marcus where you were staying?"

"I said I was staying with a friend for a little while. He didn't ask anything and neither did the kids. I think they're so used to me disappearing on tour that it doesn't make much difference if I'm there or not anymore." Bernie topped Serena's glass up with their new bottle.

"I'm sure that's not the case, Bern."

Bernie took a large sip of her wine. "I always had it in my head when I got married that I would be a perfect wife. Always there for my kids, and for my husband. Not some lesbian screw-up, lying to her family about who she really is."

Serena reached out instinctively, taking hold of Bernie's hand and squeezing it gently. She had no words to help her colleague, she couldn't fix this for her and she hated that she was so powerless. Bernie squeezed her hand back and their fingers laced together.

The feeling of their hands entwined made Serena's heart skip a beat. She looked up at Bernie, both terrified and eager to read the blonde's reaction to their contact.

Bernie's deep brown eyes were so full of warmth it took Serena's breath away. She couldn't remember the last time someone had looked at her with so much trust and… something else. Something else that sent warmth across her body and down into her body, curling itself tightly in her lower stomach and making her feel weak.

She pulled her hand away from Bernie's. "It's awfully hot in here, isn't it?" She didn't wait for Bernie's reply, getting up from her seat and leaving the pub, desperate for fresh air.

Her legs felt like jelly as she walked back to the hospital. She felt intoxicated, and not from the Shiraz. She wanted to surrender herself to whatever hold Bernie had on her. She wondered if Bernie had any idea about confusion and angst she had caused. Taking a deep, shuddering breath, Serena tried to wipe the thoughts from her mind.

"Serena…" Bernie appeared by her side, breathing a little heavy from having jogged over from the pub.

"I had to get some air. Sorry." She looked up at her to see only kindness in her eyes.

"We've both had a bit much too drink to drive your car home. Shall we get a taxi?"

Serena nodded and watched as Bernie hailed a taxi that had just pulled into the hospital car park to drop someone off. She was grateful Bernie hadn't asked her any questions about her swift exit from the pub.

Once home, Bernie disappeared straight to bed and Serena lay on the sofa, staring up at the ceiling. The mental image of Bernie asleep in her bed seemed to taunt her, she imagined slipping her arms around Bernie's waist, pressing her body against Bernie's as they slept.

She closed her eyes and her mind filled with the image of her fingers slipping under Bernie's t-shirt, feeling her taut stomach and then further down…

"Jesus Christ, Serena Campbell. What have you got yourself into?" She whispered to herself.