Three weeks Later:

Ana POV

I'm finally ready to return back to Seattle, after two long months of intense therapy. I've learned so much these past few months, and I also feel free and more relaxed. I have set up with a new therapist in Seattle, that Dr. Penick recommend. Dr. Penick thinks it would be good for me now, to get back in a normal routine of working and life again.

So, I'm going home.

At the moment, I'm scared about going back to reality.

I know when I go back to work, people are going to judge me for being away so long.

I'm sure somehow, they found out I'm a nutcase.

I can feel their beady eyes on me already.

Deep breaths, Ana.

You're not nutty.

You're a wonderful human being with a big heart. I repeat one of the mantras, I've been saying for the last couple months.

The only one judging me is me.

Oh, I hate these inner battles, between good and bad.

It'll be ok, Ana.

Please, tell me it's going to be ok.

And more than likely they don't know. Christian promised he hasn't said a word for my reasons, and that nobody has asked either.

Oh and he only told me to stop worrying a thousand times.

Christian did manage to have Roach set me up for Telecommute. I can skype as needed and check emails with authors and so on. So, I have been able to work some.

It was nice to get my mind of things and do what I love; reading manuscripts and editing. It's a great way to escape the real world. Can just run away into another life, feel like maybe you're someone else.

I've been able to keep the weight on that I lost. Not to mention a few extra pounds from the pregnancy. The impatient care helped see to that, not to mention the pregnancy itself. Ginger became my newest friend to keep the morning sickness away, which helped with bringing back my appetite slightly. Plus, a lot of my stress was melting away which made my stomach not so tied up in knots.

I kind of miss Christian tying me up.

Not only Is this pregnancy making me hungry it's make me horny.

Once the morning sickness was over, Wendy's Frostys became a new love in my diet. I couldn't go to bed without one. I'm pretty sure I'm wearing five pounds of the fast food treat.

If I'm going to put on the pounds, might as well enjoy doing it.

I think it might be safe to say I buried the thoughts of Steven away. Sure, they might not be totally gone, but I feel so much better, free.

Sometimes the insincerities sneak up, I don't know if those will ever go completely away. It's just teaching myself methods on how to handle them. And stop believing the words of a sick delusional man. The only words that matter are the ones that come from people that love me, and how I want to feel about myself.

One of the techniques the good doctor did with me was something as simple as writing all the things he said to me and then burning them. Then the notes of every that I love about me are to replace the ones burned.

Burn away the demons and replace with something pure and good.

Then there's my mother who I haven't seen in years. It was time to forgive her. So, I called her and she actually agreed to come to a session. She was more than thrilled to join me. I really think she was thankful for the phone call from me.

I haven't been able to talk to her since I left.

So, she flew to Georgia to Montesano the next day and we laid it all on the line. She apologized so many times for not protecting me. She would try when I wasn't around, but would end up getting beat herself. She was just afraid to leave.

She too, thought it was just some she deserved. Especially after the way she treated Ray. A man, she knows now, was more than perfect. And she threw it away. In way, she thought she was asking for it.

Steven had such a hold on her. So, when Ray took me, she signed over her rights so I would have a better chance and get away. She said she couldn't protect me from him and it was the only way she knew how. She hated herself for letting what happen, happen. For not fighting for me harder.

So, we spent two days, talking, crying and yelling. For me to keep moving on, I had to forgive her. I could see she was honest and she needed to be forgiven, so she could move on as well.

We are going to try a relationship. But, only time will tell to see what happens there.

My little Blip, is growing, I'm now sixteen weeks pregnant. I now have a small pouch where my baby lays inside of me. I went to the doctor three weeks ago, and he or she is doing good. I was so happy when Christian was able to make it for the appointment.

The way his face lit up like the fourth of July, made my heart bloom. He really wants our baby. He even showed me pictures of the room he started prepping for the baby.

Now only to figure to paint it blue or pink.

Also, I'm not sure who is more excited about going shopping for the baby. But, I think its him.

He also asked if I would move in after the baby was born. Even if nothing comes of us, he really wants to be part of the baby's life and help out. I told him I would be more than happy too.

Because I think I know now it can work between us. We've both grown in such a short time.

I could hear the relief in his voice when I told him yes. I think he thought he was going to have to beg harder. I mean were having a baby together. I want us to try.

He told me he took a parenting class to help teach him everything from diaper to proper holding techniques.

He really wants this baby. It's great to hear how it excited he is.

He's really come to terms about what Elena did to him. It's like the cold hard Dom had almost faded into the background. Granted, I only spent a day with him, but I can really see he's trying.

I mean I must've tried to roll my eyes at him a bunch of times, and all I got was a slight twitch.

We talked a week or so ago and he told me he got rid of the playroom. He had it re-painted and turned into a guestroom. He mentioned the walls are now a sea blue, and he never knew how hard red was to paint over.

When I asked him why? He said he knew he could live without it. It wasn't really who he ever was. Used it as an excuse to be in control, when he was never really in control of anything.

For some reason, I was kind of disappointed. I might have not liked everything about the red room of pain, but it wasn't all bad. Especially in the beginning before the contract, before things started crashing down.

Dr. Penick told me it was ok to still have a desire for it. She reminded me that not all the aspects of it were bad. That if I wanted to fully be with Christian again, we would both have to open the lines of communication, especially when it came to sex.

I was thankful, that my dad no longer wants to try and kill him. I never really told him what happened with me and Christian. I mainly just told him, I had a hard time adjusting to his life. It wasn't a total lie, just my dad thinks I was talking about his money and the perks that come with it. That I also just didn't know how to fit in and so on.

Even with Christian and I being apart, I feel like we actually got closer. I mean we can spend hours talking to each other, I've learned more about him these last two months then our first two months together.

I finally felt comfortable enough to tell him my past. He listened to me talk for hours. The only negative thing he said, if I can even say its negative, is he wants to hunt Morton down and do, let's say, unspeakable things to him. I don't think his words bared repeating.

Then Christian opened up to me, even though he shared some of his past with me before, he really opened up to what he learned and how it shaped who he was.

He told me he does wonder what would've happened if Bitch Troll never got a hold of him. But, if anything, he got one good thing out of it.

Me.

Everything happens for a reason, right? Rather it's good or bad.

He sends me flowers once a week, with a little note that says something about what he loved about me. Every week it would be something new; from how sexy I was, to him confessing his un-dying love for me.

Who needs therapy when you have this man.

And to think he didn't think he had it in him to do hearts and flowers. The man's heart is so big now, I think it might blow out of his chest.

However, you try telling him that, he blows you off.

I really do wonder what would of happened if he didn't have such a horrid childhood, or the Bitch Trolls claws in him, because his heart is so big and caring. I think it's something that's always lived in him, he just didn't know how to show it. I really do wish he would admit what a good soul he has.

He's loved and supported me, through this whole thing. He never once pushed me to do anything I wasn't ready to do. He listened to me whine and complain, not to mention cry for months. Never once judged me, all while working through his own trails.

And I know it couldn't have been easy for him to tell me, he loves me everyday and not hear it in return. He mentioned that he didn't care, that if I was ever ready, he would still be here. Even if it took forever. Christian just wanted me to know that I was loved, and that he'll be waiting with open arms.

Just the fact that he waited, tells me alot with the change in him and that he really does care for me. Now it's my turn to return, better than ever to his arms, and return those feelings.

Just a couple nights ago, he called me, excited and relieved. I could tell a huge weight had been lifted off him.

"I have some great news, baby?" Christian tells me his voice animated.

"What's that?"

"The bitch troll has been put away for 45 years. She was guilty of all charges."

He now calls her bitch troll, like I do. He felt she no longer deserved a first name. That made her human, which she wasn't.

"That's great. I'm so glad to hear that."

"I'm finally free of her. I wish you were here so we could celebrate." He says sobering

I can think of what kind of celebrating I want to do.

"Me too, but I'm sure your family will celebrate with you. Especially your mom."

"That's where I'm headed. I think my mom wants to hire a sky writer to exclaim her joy to the world."

"Yes, I can understand that excitement."

Christian's been spending more time with his family. To say his family is surprised Is an understatement. When Kate came to visit me a few weeks ago, so we could hang out, she told me that Elliot is in total shock to his brother's change. That he's starting to make a real effort to re-build their relationship.

Then when she had family dinner with the Grey's, Christian was smiling and laughing. She had said that Grace was an emotional mess, finally seeing her son so happy. Grace had pulled Kate aside to tell her, to thank me.

Thank me for what? I still don't know. He did that all on his own.

I'm quite proud of him.

Although, Kate reminded me, he really started to change once I came around. Grace thinks I was finally the one to finally help him see that he was worthy of love.

"Oh, and I kind have also told Kate a bit about what was happening, with the Bitch Troll. Since, it become such big news. Maybe even a little more, with might have happened between us. But, not the um… hard core stuff. I figured if you wanted to tell her it's ok. I think I trust her enough not to go spreading around rumors. I mean with the way her and my brother are going, she'll be family soon. And since she's shown you great support I figured she should know somethings."

Mind blown.

"Wow, Christian. You didn't have to. I wouldn't have…"

"I'm not ashamed anymore. She was actually quite supportive. I kind of expected her to be disgusted."

"She comes off stand-offish, but her heart is good." I tell him.

"I'm starting to see that now." He pauses for a minute. "So, tell me about your day…"

X-X-X-X-X-X

I wanted to surprise Christian with my return home. I told him I would be back in two days, so I made sure Kate and Elliot invited them to the apartment. Kate told me he actually said he would be there.

Then on Sunday, I'm going to finally meet the rest of his family.

I can only hope they like me and I don't make an ass of myself.

You know like fall on my face; like the first time I met Christian.

Christian waited till after my last appointment to tell his family about the baby. I had asked if he would wait because I wanted to make sure the baby was ok again. I was afraid of jinxing it.

I know he was dying to tell them right away, but he agreed to wait. I mean it was only a month. It's normal for couples to wait.

I know he must have read it in one of those baby books he bought. I think he only bought every single own every published known to man.

Plus, I lived in fear thinking that I might have hurt the baby when I wasn't eating and was extremely stressed out.

Christian said his family is over the moon about the new addition, his mom was over the moon about being a grandma, that she's already spoiling the baby. Also, they really can't wait to finally meet me. I mean I will be the first girl he's ever brought home.

And I come with child.

I'm just extremely nervous about finally facing the real world again. I kind of have been in my own bubble for two months. I didn't have to deal with real world problems, on top of my own. Now I'm thrusting myself back out there.

No training wheels.

Ana meet world.

But, I feel like I'm in a better place to finally face it all.

I finally feel as like I love myself again.

I feel stronger, my head feels clearer.

I know that I'm allowed to be loved, and also give love.

That sometimes it's ok to be down, sad even. But, I've learned tips to power through those feelings. Sometimes you got to look at the bright side. I hated hearing that in the beginning. It was hard to see light sometimes when everything looks so grim.

Everyday the sun raised again, and I was still here, a little stronger then before.

I had to let go of the lies I was told. Move past the hurt. That I'm worth loving.

And I got there. My light, was the baby.

And Christian.

Knowing we were going to be a Family.

My little own family, our family.

I'm trying not to doubt everything when it comes to us. I'm hoping that now we can go forward and have a real relationship.

So, world meet Ana.

New and improved and ready to kick ass.

I might not be perfect, but I can only get better from this point forward.

The only person that can tear me down now is me, and I won't let that happen again.

So, here I am on the doorstep of my old apartment. I had shipped my stuff back a week ago, and my dad drove me here today. He wanted to stay, to make sure I was ok. So, he'll be staying in a hotel for a couple of days.

My father has been my rock during the whole thing. He doesn't judge me, and was always a shoulder to cry on.

He was with me the first time, so he knew most of the reasons I was feeling the way I was.

I ring the doorbell and Kate comes to the door and answers it.

She smiles when she sees me giving me a hug. "I'm so glad you're back, Steele." She pulls me I the door "Look what I found on the doorstep." She announces to Elliot and Christian.

I see Elliot nudge Christian who has his back to me. When he turns around, his eyes grow wide with a hug smile on that handsome face.

"Ana…" He says surprised.

"Christian…are you going to give me a hug?" I ask opening my arms for him.

There's still the thoughts of rejection screaming in my ear. I push that thought down when he comes to me and engulfs me in his arms.

"You're back early…" He tells me in my ear, I'm still gripped in his arms.

"I wanted to surprise you."

"Well, I'm surprised baby." He lays a kiss on my forehead.

But, it's not enough for me. I grab his face and plant a kiss on his lips. His lips mold against mine and he parts his lips to allow my tongue into his mouth.

God, I missed his kiss. For two months, all it's been only light kisses and light touches. Neither one of us wanting to push the other.

We finally break away, and I notice that Kate and Elliot have left the room.

"Now, I have really missed that." He tells me.

"Me too." I grin.

He hugs me again, and we just stand there holding each other.

He run my hands down my face, pushing back enough so he can look at me.

"I love you." I blurt out.

He stands there studying me, and what seems like forever, and I'm fighting the doubts in my head.

He smiles at me brightly. "Oh, baby it feels so good to hear you say that. I love you too. So much."

He runs his hand over my stomach.

I know in this moment we will be ok.

"I love both of you." He whispers before kissing me again.

"I don't think I could thank you enough for staying by my side for these months. You loved and supported me when you really didn't have too. You were going through so much of your own stuff, but you stayed with me. Along with my dad and Kate, you were the one that really helped me through. Knowing you loved me, even when I couldn't say the words. I mean if anything that says the most."

"I will always be here for you, baby. I'm going to stay with you through anything. I also have to thank you, because if it wasn't for you, I would've never started my own search for myself.. I just hate that you had to hit rock bottom for me to really start wanting to be something more."

"What do they say you sometimes gotta hit rock bottom, to start climbing back up. I think it's time for us to kind of start over again with each other. Free from our past and start anew."

"I would like that," He smiles.

Well, there's only one way to do that. "Hi, I'm Anastasia Steele."

I put out my hand for him to shake it.

He looks at me funny and I can't help but giggle at his expression.

He takes my hand to shake. "Christian Grey."

"It's nice to meet you Christian."

"You too. But I should tell you something before we move on."

"What's that?"

"I have some incredibly powerful sperm, so I might have already knocked you up." He winks.

I can't help but giggle at him, yep everything will be ok.

A/N: I wanted to end this on a high note. As I stated before, nothing is going to be perfect and they will have ups and downs. But what matters is they have each other now. They got the help I think they needed so they could start over. They have started to heal.

I didn't want to write about them having the baby and meeting the family and etc. because that's not what this story was about. it was about them discovering themselves. Coping and freeing themselves from past demons so they can move to a better life. Learn to be happy with oneself. Fight a monster - and heal. Hope you understand.

To me, this chapter wasn't as perfect as I wanted it to be after everything got deleted. I re-read it a million times, I just couldn't do any more to it. I think I covered everything I hope.

Thank you for joining me on the journey.

The song I think of for this story is Martina McBride - I'm Gonna Love You Through It - sure it's about supporting someone through Cancer, but I think the words alone are powerful. That support and love are the most important for anybody struggling with anything in this life.