When The World Stops Turning
Chapter 8
Trowa sat in Duo's room reading a book called "The Rhythm of Life" by Matthew Kelly, (1) he found it left on top of Duo's desk. So far it was a very interesting book about discovering who you are, and becoming the best version of yourself you could be or at least that's what it seemed like to him, he never even knew Duo read those kinds of books. He was about to turn to the next page after reading an interesting bit about Billy Joel when the door opened.
"Oh, hey Trowa, have you seen Quatre?" asked Relena still standing in the doorway.
"Uh....no, but where's Duo?"
"Oh yeah, well he's with Cal in his and Heero's room, it seems that they're going to all sit down and have a well deserved chat." Said Relena a bit hesitantly at first.
"What!?" said Trowa loudly.
"I was afraid you'd react like that. Look like I said, they're just talking so you have nothing to worry about. Cal's always been sensible and Heero should be willing to hear both of them out. So before you jump to quote unquote "the rescue" let them try to work it out themselves alone and together. Ok?"
"Fine." Sighed Trowa in defeat "and Quatre's in the Library."
"I thought you said you didn't know where he was at?" Said Relena with mock anger written on her face.
"I just remembered where he was at right now, anyways I think I'll go with you. I don't think I can just sit here anymore. I've gotten too use to being around groups of people."
"Curtsey of one Duo Maxwell I suppose." said Relena tucking a stray strand of hair behind her ear as she and Trowa passed by Cal and Heero's room. "You sure have changed Trowa."
"I guess so..............and for the better." Said Trowa descending down the stairs, he paused for a second and glanced back at the door to the room in which Duo was currently sitting in, then kept walking.
"That's for sure. You were always so quite and always seemed depressed. Glad to know that someone was able to finally bring out this happy side of you." You could hear Relena's voice start to grow lower and lower with each step down the stairway.
Meanwhile back in the aforementioned room of Heero and Cal. Duo, Heero, and Cal were all just sitting, or standing in Heero's case, quietly waiting for someone other than themselves to start off the other wise "civilized" conversation that they were suppose to be having at this second.
"Well?" asked Heero finally getting tired of waiting. "I've somewhere I want to be, so make this quick."
Cal turned to look at Duo hoping that he would say something first, but seeing the stern look on his face made him realize that Duo wanted him to tell Heero how he felt before they got any further into anything else. So taking a deep breath Cal spoke.
"Heero, I love you........." Cal knew that he was putting himself out there to be hurt, but it would be better to hear Heero say it then to read it.
"And you want what from me?" asked Heero raising an eyebrow.
"Damnit Heero just tell him!" yelled Duo.
"Look what do you want me to say?!" yelled Heero back at Duo, but staring directly at Cal.
"How you feel Heero, what you're feeling right now, this very moment." Whispered Cal dropping his gaze towards his clasped hands and Duo stood next to Cal and placed his hand reassuringly on his shoulder and gripped lightly. Heero glared at Cal for a brief second then his expression went back to a state of impassive blankness. Slumping his shoulders in a quite defeat he grabbed a chair from the desk in front of his window and placed it right in front of Cal. Placing his hands together on top of his legs he let his head drop and then spoke.
"I really don't know what to say other than..............well it's just............I can't see you in a romantic way. I'm so sorry Cal." Cal looked directly at Heero, Heero also was staring straight into Cal's eyes not wavering.
"Can't we at least try? Or is it because the person you really want is Duo?" Heero looked at Duo whose expression he couldn't gauge at the moment and then nodded.
"Heero I think," Duo paused for a second, feeling awkward now that Cal had brought up Heero's feelings. "well really what I want to say is, nothing is going to make me leave Trowa for you, nothing. And I'm not trying to be insensitive or anything it's just, what would ever make you think I'd willingly want to after what you did?" Duo could see the quick flash of hurt that passed Heero's face.
Heero started to fiddle with his fingers for a second looking down at his feet from between his legs, "I guess, just hoping against hope. Look, Duo people make mistakes and I made a huge...........ginumbis," he gestured with his hands for a brief second and continued to fiddle with his fingers again. "extremely dumb mistake. I'm only human and I can't help what my instincts are."
"Wait, your instincts are to vindictively hurt other people Heero?!" said Duo with the vaguest hint of anger.
"NO! It's just............God why is it so hard to say these kinds of fucking things? It's just, Duo I love you, I honestly fucking love you and I'm sorry that I hurt you the way I did. I never meant to hurt anyone, ever.............. ever. Especially you, Duo, no one and I mean no one has ever meant this much to me in quite some time. I just didn't realize how much you really meant to me until after I.........." Heero stopped fiddling with his fingers and had them clasped together and was staring out the window. Duo just rolled his eyes and turned his head and saw the look on Cal's face. The poor boy looked about to cry, hell even Heero looked like he wanted to cry. Shit the guy couldn't even finish his damn sentence.
The three of them just stared off into a general nothingness trying to piece together there own thoughts. Not really wanting to start up the conversation again, all three just let their minds go blank, from time to time only momentarily listening to hear if anyone started to say things. Duo couldn't help but wonder what Trowa was doing in his absence and wished that he could bring himself to leave, but for some reason he knew he would feel bad if he did. Cal kept trying to figure out a way that would make Heero realize how much they needed each other. Heero on the other hand was at a lose, he wanted Duo-that he was sure of, but he kept thinking about the way Cal kept looking at him in that certain way. It made him think back to the times when he'd find Cal curled up in his bed after obviously crying himself to sleep. God he felt so awful, here Cal was pouring his heart and soul out to him and all he could do was reject him.
Suddenly there was a loud bell ringing throughout the entire school.
Duo not knowing what it was jumped up and ended up somehow tripping over, arms flying about him. Heero quirked an eyebrow in Duo's direction letting a slight smirk grace his lips. Cal looked at Heero and then turned his head in Duo's direction on the floor and tried not to laugh. Duo was wide eyed and was staring every which way.
"What the hell is that?!" yelled Duo from his place on the floor near the bed.
"It's a lock down Duo." Said Cal helping him up.
"Don't tell me your previous schools never had one." Said Heero getting up and looked out the window and saw all the students that were around running franticly towards the direction of a room and quick at that. If he remembered correctly half of the school had been locked out the last time they had one.
"No, I've never even heard of it before." Then the door to Heero's room opened and closed quickly as two boys, namely Kiley and Wufei, entered and locked the door behind them.
"Well it's definitely been a while since they've done one of these now hasn't it?" said Kiley smiling/laughing.
"Bathroom." Growled out Heero pointing to the bathroom.
"But I don't have to pee." Said Kiley moving away from the door.
"Shut up, you know what he meant. Now lets go." Wufei just grabbed him by the writs and dragged him in the direction of the lavatory slamming the door and locking it behind them. Wufei took root on top of the toilet seat and Kiley sat on the edge of the tub.
Finally the lock-down bell stopped ringing. Kiley looked at Wufei and smiled then looked down at his feet suddenly nervous by the fact he and Wufei were in a room alone together. Wufei had always usually made a habit of always having someone else around or near them, like if they were in his room the door would always be open.
"Kiley?" said Wufei with this contemplative look on his face.
"Yes Wufei?" said Kiley smiling still hoping it would cover his nervousness.
"I've been thinking recently, very, very recently and well I've been mulling over, you know, debating over something in my mind..............you like me right?"
"Um........is that a trick question?" asked Kiley playing with a strand of his hair feeling his throat start to tighten, he swallowed hard trying to push that lump in his throat down.
"Kiley." Said Wufei in a warning town.
"Yes damn it, I do!" he got up and slid past the curtain and crawled into the tub pulling his legs up to his chest and draping his arms around them while resting his chin on his knees.
"Kiley!" said Wufei pulling the curtain open so that he could see Kiley.
"What!" yelled Kiley jerking his head to the side so that he was facing the tiles and not Wufei's over powering gaze. "look if you're going to finally tell me to get lost I will, just don't yell at me for being utterly stupid and pathetic for liking someone who would never like me back ok?"
"That's not what I was going to say." He paused trying to gather up enough guts (A.K.A. nerve) to say what he was about to say. "Look, let me just say that this isn't going to be easy for me to admit, but I might be starting to get over Sally. Yes, the unthinkable has happened and I've come to my senses, and I realize being different isn't always easy............so Kiley I want you to help me." He jumped into the tub and in front of Kiley, placing both of his hands on his checks and made Kiley face him so that he was staring directly into his eyes. "Help me be different Kiley, with you."
"I'm not sure I know what you're asking ." said Kiley feeling awkward for the first time in his life.
"I beg to differ." whispered Wufei as he awkwardly brought their lips together in an attempt to create a romantic ambiance and give Kiley better understanding of what he meant.
On the other side of the door Duo stood there trying to listen to their conversation after hearing Kiley yell.
"You know Duo it's wrong to pry into others live like that ." said Cal leaning against the closet door, Heero just nodded to Cal's statement.
"Well then what am I doing here then?" asked Duo throwing his hands up gesturing to the "vast expanse" of room.
"You're involved in what's going on." stated Heero sitting down on the chest in front of his bed while leaning against the foot board of the bed and crossing his arms.
"Look I don't know if either of you realize this, but you're made for each other. I mean seriously, you both remind me of a poem I read back at my last school especially the part where it goes "I'm desperate, you're alone, we're alike," it goes on from there but I'm not explaining it. But honestly, both of you need to open your eyes. Heero we're not meant for each other, and hey the sex was great, there's no doubting that on my part, but there was nothing else coming from you, just lust. I don't know what else to tell you, except I'm sorry it couldn't work out , no wait, I take that back. I'm ecstatic that it didn't work out, if it wasn't for you I'd have never gotten to be with Trowa so you know what Heero, thank you." Said Duo as he smiled and quickly hugged him and stood near the door and unlocked and opened it, looked both ways and ran out to his room.
Heero just stared at the door with this longing look in his eyes. He looked at his feet for a moment then Cal spoke.
"He wasn't supposed to leave the room yet."
"Uh....ha ha....." Heero shook his head and smiled briefly. Hearing a slight choked back sob sound he looked up at Cal to see him crying. "What's wrong Cal?!"
"I don't get it, why, why don't you want me the way you want him? What's so defective about me that you don't want to see me in that way? Heero I love you, me, not him, me............god Heero you've meant everything to me for so long, you've been my world. I can...........I don't know what I'm going to do, if you can't love me back like this. It hurts Heero, I feel like I'm dying Look at me, see me Heero I'm right here...........I'm on the verge of not caring anymore. Lets just go back to how things were just...............just continue to sleep with me, use me, I don't care! So long as I still get to be in your arms at night. And I know this is going to sound corny, but please Heero, catch me before I fall!"
"Cal, I don't think it could be the same. I couldn't just use you knowing how you really felt. I have more respect for you then that, you know how much that would end up hurting you in the end? And you know that's the kind of thing that leads to physiological damage."
"Well I think I'm pretty damn well past that! But Heero tell me, why can't you love me!!"
"Because I'm afraid to!! I can't stand the thought of losing another person who means this much to me. I've already lost my mom, I don't want to lose you.............because if I lost you this way, I'd know it was all my fault."
"Heero you aren't going to lose me." Cal stepped in closer to Heero and wrapped his arms around him letting his arms warp around Heero's chest and rested his chin on Heero's head while they both just stared out the window.
"Give me a reason to believe you." Said Heero hooking his hands around Cal's arms and leaning his head into Cal's chest.
Cal tilted his head over so that he could see Heero's face. "Because you're the only person who matters to me." he saw tears start to make their way down Heero's tanned cheeks. "You're the only person I've ever dream of when I'm sleeping." He could feel Heero's body start to shake. "'Cause you're the only person I want to spend the rest of my life with." Whispered Cal.
"Cal this isn't how I wanted things to end up..................." Cried Heero shutting his eyes tightly.
"I know Heero, I know." Said Cal wrapping his arms tighter around him.
Then the bathroom door opens and out walks Kiley and Wufei. Both Heero and Cal turn their heads and watch as the two boys make their way to the door, they could barely make out the blush on Kiley's face and they could definitely make out the smile on Wufei 's face. And just as Wufei was about to close the door behind him and Kiley he paused and looked at they pair by the window and said with a smile still on his face.
"Being different is scary." Then promptly closed the door behind himself.
Duo quickly unlocked his bedroom door and stepped in. " Please spend eternity with me, I'll spend it with you, but will you spend it with me?"(2)
"Duo you're not supposed to leave a room when there's a lock down in precession."
"Holy shit you scared the crap out of me.!"
"Great use of your vocabulary, Duo."
"I know ain't it?" smiled Duo walking over to his bed and laying down on his back.
"Isn't it."
"Is What?"
"Never mind. So how did it go?"
"What.......oh yeah, well it went pretty decent if you asked me"
"And if I didn't ask you?" said Trowa as he took root next to Duo on the bed and started playing with his bangs while he stared up at the ceiling.
"It went kinda bad, at least for the other two Heero said that he couldn't love Cal because he couldn't see him romantically, which is complete crap if you ask me. Meanwhile Heero was still trying to repent and profess his love for me; while Cal seemed to get angrier by the fact that Heero, I guess, just couldn't let go." Duo closed his eyes.
"Wow that is kind of bad." Trowa turned on his side and looked at Duo. "So what do you thinks going to happen?"
Duo shivered slightly as Trowa's breath ghosted across his face, he shifted so that he was now facing Trowa. "I guess we just hope they work things out in the end."
-A Month later-
"I can't believe you forgot the frosting ."
"Sorry Duo." Said both boys standing in front of Duo.
"Anyways it was all Heero's fault, he was the one who took forever in the bathroom. I even told him that we still needed to pick up the frosting, but he said he didn't want to be late." Heero glared at Cal.
"That's ok, I think I can manage to rectify this situation." Said Duo smiling. "Cal you go put the gift on the table outside with the others, Heero go to the fridge and pull out the cream cheese and whip-cream and I'll get the bowls. We're making our own frosting."
"Do I even want to know how you came up with this idea?" asked Heero sifting through the contents of the fridge, finding the desired objects he pulls them out and puts them on the counter next to the mixing bowl.
"My mom, we didn't have a lot of money when I was younger so we had to work with what we had." Said Duo pulling out the mixer and handing it to Heero, Cal walked in just as Duo unwrapped the cream cheese. "Come here Cal, I want you to put double of the whip-cream into the bowl while Heero mixes it."
"Why?"
"I need to go outside that's why." said Duo smiling and quickly left the kitchen to go outside into the backyard.
The entire backyard was decorated nicely, it was Trowa's birthday and he wanted it to be perfect; since it would be the first the both of them would be spending together. He got Trowa's sister and Relena to help do the decorating, while Trowa's parents provided the food and took Trowa to go pick out his gift. Everything was going smoothly, Wufei and Kiley brought the cake mix and drinks, Relena and Catherine did the decorating, Quatre had provided the decorations that they both picked out, and Heero and Cal were "supposed" to bring the frosting, but that was no big setback all they were waiting for now was Trowa and his parents to arrive.
It actually surprised him that after Heero and Cal got together, Trowa seemed to get along better with the pair. Trowa still didn't get along too well with Heero, but as long as Cal was with Heero everything was fine.
"Duo a car just pulled into the driveway." Said Wufei tying a balloon and throwing it in no general direction.
"Heero, Cal, bring the cake out quick and put it on the table." Called Duo straitening the table cloth.
"Duo relax everything's perfect." Said Relena placing a bowl of punch on the table. Cal and Heero both come out carrying the two layered cream cheese whip-cream cake and placing it on the table. Five seconds later Trowa and his parents come through, his parents are covering his eyes.
Everyone was so quite-
Then they uncovered his eyes-
"Surprise.!" Yelled everyone.
Duo walked over to Trowa and wrapped his left arm around his lovers shoulder and brought him to the table. Kissing Trowa quickly on the cheek Duo whispered to him.
"Happy birthday Trowa."
"Kiss, kiss, kiss." cheered a small group of teens opposite them of the table.
"I doubt his parents need to see that."
"His parents got a camera just for the occasion!" called Catherine smiling widely.
"Want to give them a show?" whispered Duo softly into Trowa's ear causing the other boy to shiver slightly.
"You always have to do something extravagant don't you?"
"You bet." Said Duo turning Trowa's head and kissing him softly on the lips then deepened the kiss.
"Gee you two I know we said kiss, but if you're going to do that go upstairs." Said Kiley laughing.
"If you say so!" said Duo pulling Trowa into the house with him.
"Duo wait!" called Catherine and Relena going after them yelling about having to cut the cake and opening gifts, sans the fact that they were at Trowa's parents house. Duo felt it couldn't have gone better.
END
One: It's a book I've been reading. It's really good too.
Two: That's a poem I wrote last summer called "Destined to be" and just because I feel like it here is the complete version of it. ( I really have nothing better to do, so yeah anyway here it is.)
Destined to Be
To know someone from childhood,
To love someone from childhood
I know you, I know you, you know me?
I love you, love you, you love me?
Devoted as I am to you
Devoted as you are to me.
I see you, I see you, you see me?
I need you, I need you, you need me?
I've given my heart to you,
But will you give your heart to me?
I'm desperate, your alone, we're alike,
Please spend eternity with me;
I'll spend it with you,
But will you spend it with me?
XXXX
A/N: So I hope you enjoyed the fic! And I hope that now that I'm done with this one I'll be able to finish some of my others, which I hope some of you go and read, please?
And as always Review, Review!!
Sev-chan out. .