"Oh, Potter..." Voldemort's lips curled in a mirthless smile. "So you believe you can kill me?" The Death Eaters behind him laughed. Harry stood firm. "I fear you'll be quite disappointed..."

"Yes, yes, the Horcruxes," Harry said, waving his hand, and Voldemort acquired an expression that indicated he would have blanched, were he able to become any paler. "Those don't matter for this, though."

Voldemort recovered, then threw back his head and let out a high, cold laugh. "I would be quite interested," he said, once he had stopped, "to learn of this method. Amuse me, Potter. What has a schoolboy thought of that I, Lord Voldemort, did not?"

Harry took the mokeskin bag out of his pocket and, with a grunt, turned it inside-out. For a moment, the mouth stretched impossibly wide, and then -

Now it was the Death Eaters' turn to blanch as a Dementor landed on the ground before them, chill and hungry. "Expecto Patronum!" Harry snapped out, and the monstrosity fled the spectral stag that emerged from his wand. Which, of course, meant that it was fleeing towards the dumbstruck Death Eaters.

The Patronus Charm, of course, was that very special sort of spell that a fifteen-year-old could teach a bunch of teenagers, but a group of adults, several of whom had spent over a decade in Azkaban, somehow never got around to learning. As such, the whole group promptly fled in every direction, with Voldemort being no exception. Unfortunately for him, the Dementor was making a beeline away from the now-pursuing Patronus, which just so happened to be herding it towards the Dark Lord. And, as it so turned out, a Dementor could make remarkably good time when it had sufficient incentive.

Of course, a chased Dementor tended to work up an appetite, and so, when the Patronus abruptly abandoned its pursuit, the abomination swooped down upon the nearest soul in range and began to dine. Hm - this one was awfully chunky. As the prey writhed within its icy grasp, the Dementor settled down to really deepening the Kiss with a vigor to make the most cliched romance novel proud. Just a little more... More suction... Bits had just gotten "stuck in the straw", so to speak... This meal was really a bit too chunky, it would complain to the caterer... Just a little more...

With a pop, distant fragments of the prey gave way, and it at last got to slurp down the whole meal. Hm... Part of it was already gone? It really would have to complain about this meal... Releasing the soulless husk from its embrace, the Dementor scanned the area. Yes... yes, there were other, defenseless prey... Perhaps it could catch up if it really worked for it... It would end this day full one way or another...

Though he had to squint his eyes against his sudden migraine, Harry watched the proceedings with a vicious smile. "Well worth the effort of fitting the Dementor in there in the first place," he said to himself, nodding affectionately at the humble little piece of hopelessly warped space-time. "Best birthday present ever."