Not mine, can't begin to tell ya what I'd do with em' if they were….

Pictures Never Lie:

Look What I Made Ma!

On the fourth of July in the year of our Lord 2013, I gave birth to my FINAL child. I, in keeping true to my promise that I was never again returning to a delivery room, gave birth in the back of Woody's 1968 Ford Mustang (which to this day he refers to as his "Pimp mobile").  The baby was born somewhere between our home and Newton-Wellesley Hospital and Led Zeppelin's "D'yer Mak'er was playing on the radio. We should have figured out then that this was going to be our rebel child.

"Aw man!" 10 year old Emily said from the door as she strolled in and was presented with the "awful truth" that everyone had not deceived her, and the baby was in fact, another boy.

"What a gip!" Emily said and crossed her arms over the number 12 of her soccer uniform. "First you have the baby during probably the most IMPORTANT game of my childhood life and…and then it's not even a girl!?" Emily said annoyed. She looked up from the baby in my arms to my sweaty angry face.

"I mean…HE'S real cute Mom." She said before rolling her eyes and sitting down to pull off her soccer cleats and shin guards. Woody stepped over her to bring me another pillow in my bed. I had threatened him with death if he didn't talk the nurses into temporarily covering up the "Maternity" sign as I got off the elevator. Either he did it or I was leaving Father blank on the kid's birth certificate.

"Here ya go honey." He said leaning me forward and placing the pillow behind me. Chester sat beside me on the bed occasionally poking and prodding the sleeping bundle in my arms. After he'd had enough of the abuse, the baby popped one eye angrily open.

"Wow." Woody said picking Chester up and placing him on the floor. "Now THAT was a Cavanaugh look." He said pointing to the angry little scowl.

"Gee thanks Sport.": I said and cut my eyes at him.

"No! But look sweetie!" Woody said pushing a strand of hair out of my eyes. "His eyes are dark blue! This one might get your eyes this time!" I made a tornado motion with my finger.

"Woo hoo." I said characteristically LESS than exuberant. "Just took 4 kids and until I was." I dropped my voice to a whisper. "44 years old." I said and glared at Woody. He opted to change the subject.

"So…What the hell are we naming this kid?" Woody asked leaning over the little boy curiously. He was trying to "see" what name he looked like.

"Why dontcha name him "Ooops!" since he was a mistake!" Emily said grinning as she threw her shoes and guards on the chair next to where John was rocking feverishly on the rocking chair.

Woody and I were speechless. "Who told you that?!" Woody asked placing his hands on his hips in a very father-like pose. "Uncle Nigel." She said matter of factly and sighed as she strolled over to climb up on the bed with Chester, the baby and I. Woody just shook his head and glared out at the waiting room doors, I was sure it was going to be another few minutes before Woody was going to let anyone in.

"Emily Jane! You're brother was NOT a mistake! He was a…" She cut me off and pushed down the blanket to look at her new brother.

" I know…I know…he was a 'surprise' cause a mistake is bad and a surprise is usually something good…" She said then mumbled, "And sometimes it's a boy…".

"That's it!" Woody said swatting her to get off the bed. "Take Chester and John out to the waiting room and tell Uncle Nigel why I need to talk to him later." Woody said lifting Ches off the bed and holding the rocking chair still so that John could hop down. Emily took both their hands and we watched as they hurried to the waiting room doors and John pushed them open. Woody turned back to me and sighed. He leaned over the bed and kissed my head and then lifted the cap off the baby and kissed his head too.

"Well, he has a mo-hawk already maybe we should call him Mr. T." Woody said trying to lighten my mood. I let a small smile spread across my face, but didn't let it reach my eyes until Woody took the baby's hand and squeaked out, 'I pity the fool!" We shared a laugh and then Woody sat down on the mattress next to me and took the baby from my arms. He held him up and he yawned.

"With a rebel yell." Woody said chuckling as the baby stretched one arm out, making him look amusingly like he was pumping his fist at a concert while singing. I smiled.

"Rebel!" I said and Woody looked at me horrified.

"You wanna name him Rebel, sweetie?" He asked sadly. I shook my head.

"No no no…but I do wanna name him AFTER a rebel." I said and took one of his little hands. "Jefferson Davis." I said proudly. Woody's head snapped toward me.

"WHAT!?" he asked exasperated. I smiled.

"He was a president." I said tickling the baby's tummy. Woody nodded.

"Uh huh…yeah…OF THE CONFEDERATE STATES DURING THE CIVIL WAR!" He exclaimed and the baby's eyes opened and his mouth formed an 'oh'.

I smiled and took the baby from him. "Uh uh buddy, this one's mine to name…you got AAAALLL the others. This is for me." I said and kissed his little nose. A doctor walked in just as I finished.

"Someone in here need a vasectomy consult?" the doctor asked looking up from some papers. Woody's eyes widened and I smiled and him.

"And that's for you!" I said and he shook his head.

"Oh….no no no no no…" he said following the doctor out the door. I laughed and laid Jeff in my lap.

"Hi Jeff…well…I guess you better milk this baby thing for all it's worth…" I said and he yawned again. "Cause you're it kid…" I said and he began to coo. "I'm getting to old for this shit." I whispered and he swung his arms. I picked at his hair. Woody was right, he did have hair in a pattern that looked distinctly like a mo-hawk.

"So…" I said holding his little hands. "You were born in the back of a car…the first voice you heard was Robert Plant's singing …you've got a mo-hawk…" He yawned with a squeak and I smiled. " And a rebel yell." I said running a finger over his chapped little lips. "We're gonna hafta watch out for you the most aren't we? I'll have to check with your Daddy on that one. I was an only child, he understands what it's like to deal with a 'baby of the family' better than I do. And if you're uncle Cal is any indication, we're certainly down for a head of white hair before I'm 50." I said as his lips searched hungrily for me.

"Yeah, yeah…I know the drill." I said holding him to my chest as I pulled up the t-shirt I had changed into.

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19 years later

Today is the beginning of a whole new time of Woody and my life together. Today he's retiring from the force as Chief of Police. All of the kids are out of the house, not far out of the house but out of the house just the same.

Emily just passed the detective exam and requested placement in the same precinct her father had begun at.

"Congratulations Daddy!" I hear Emily say from the front door on the other side of the wall as I stand looking at the only family picture I would allow to be taken after Jeff was born.

I stood by my promise that we would never again have a professional family picture taken. In this one, which Nigel also took, we're just being ourselves. No seating arrangements, no drill sergeant orders. The picture was taken during Jeff's 3rd birthday and we had a huge block party for him. All the neighbor's came, some that I've known my whole life. Yes, we stayed in the city when we moved out of Dad's place when Emily was about 2 and a half. We thought of moving to the burbs, but it would be a little longer a commute for Woody and, well, I just never saw myself as cut out for suburbia. My kids still got all they needed and I even got to teach the first few how to play stickball on the street while still allowing traffic to proceed through. I can't help laughing as I look at the picture. Woody is sitting in the middle of our couch, laughing and red faced with his bare feet Indian style on the cushions. Chester is up on his shoulders, his light brown hair darkened from a water balloon fight outside and his arms wrapped tightly around his fathers chin. My dad is sitting on the end of the sofa, little Jeff on his lap, each with identical smiles. Emily, a young teen by this time is sitting between her father and grandfather, her head resting tenderly against her grandfather's shoulder and hand resting on his knee. Boy did I get dethroned when that child was born. On Woody's other side, I'm sitting, laughing as Woody is and trying to hold 5 year old Chester up on his father's shoulders, all the while keeping an arm around John who's beside me. John, my little angel. I am sure even looking at it now, that John was wise well beyond his years. When he hit the age of six something just turned in him and he became very calm and pleasant. His demeanor became laid back and reflective. And he was smart. Very smart.

As I look up from the picture I can't help but swell with pride as I see myself reflected in the glass frame of John's college diploma. He graduated 4th in his class from Harvard. He's just finished up Med school and is working on a surgical internship at Mass General. He lives in a rented apartment about 4 blocks from our home and takes the bus to work each day. Because he hasn't got a job, we're paying the rent on the apartment right now and John consistently reminds us that he will absolutely pay us back the money.

"Dad," I hear Emily's warning voice from the other side of the wall and decide to listen and see what happens. "Say hello to Brian." She says sternly and I hear Woody clear his throat.

"I was going to, don't patronize me little girl." He says playfully and I peek around the corner to see Emily's fiancée hovering frightened in the doorway.

"Um..Hel..hello sir….congratulations." Brian says taking Woody's hands firmly. Woody smiles politely and nods.

"Thank you son, so how's things at the county fridge?" Woody asks and Brian smiles, running a hand through his hair.

"Fine sir, just as much fun as I'm sure it was when your wife was there." He says visibly relaxing. Woody pats his shoulder and leads them both inside.

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Woody was shocked when his daughter began dating one of our local M.E.s.

I had just smiled and winked at him as we watched them walking hand in hand down the street together. 'maybe he's got a thing for cops?' I had suggested and Woody harrumphed and headed up the stairs to our room. I chuckled as I watched Emily wrap an arm around Brian's middle and him do the same to her.

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Woody is just about to close the door when he stops at hearing John's voice at the door.

"Hey! Easy Pop!" John says pushing the door open gently and smiling at his father. Woody smiles and takes John in his arms. John is a good 2 inches taller than his father, and he looks just like his uncle Calvin did once upon a time. "I haven't been away long enough for you to change the locks on me have I Pop?" he says patting his father on the shoulder. Woody laughs and takes John playfully by the back of the neck and drags him into the house.

"Whoa! Wait! Aren't you forgetting somebody?" Woody asks as John turns back to the door where his new girlfriend Christine is standing. I decide to come out of hiding now.

"Hi sweetheart!" I say hurrying to the door and hugging Christine. She holds me tightly for a few moments. Christine came from a small family and a broken home, being around us was like Christmas every day to her.

"Hi Mrs. Hoyt!" she says and kisses my cheek. I take her face in my hands for a moment.

"How are you doing sweetheart?" I ask and she smiles at my concern.

"Good…umm…we…that is John and I are….uhh…thinking of moving in together!" she says and I smile. "Good, then he can get a job and start paying the rent!" I say laughing and put my arm around her as we follow everyone into the kitchen.

I take out some coffee cups and am about to pour everyone some coffee when there is a knock at the door. I hurry to the door, hoping that it is another of my boys. When I reach the door and pull it open, I smile and hush my son Jeff, who is standing just outside.

"Who is it Babe?" I hear Woody call from the kitchen and I smile. Over thirty years of Boston has given him a bit of an accent. An accent which all of our children have.

"I'll be right there, Dear!" I holler and gesture for Jeff to come in. He smiles and wraps an arm around who I assume is the young bride he's been writing of for the past year since he graduated high school and took off on those nomad feet of his to play guitar in a band in California. We aren't thrilled that he has married so young and without us there to see him, but we understood. Jeff marched to the beat of a different drummer than all the rest of our kids. We slowly creep down the hallway and I smile at Woody, tears filling my eyes. He narrows his eyes at me, and I step forward.

"Woody. There's someone our youngest child would like you to meet…" I say and step out of the way.

"Well," Jeff says stepping forward and placing a small bundle in his father's arms. "Actually, two people I'd like you to meet." He says, his still boyish face lighting up proudly as Woody's eyes fill with tears and he takes his first look at his first granddaughter. He is speechless.

I walk over to stand next to my husband. He's practically paralyzed. I gently lay my hand on the baby's chest as she stares up at her grandfather with her huge, hooded, crystal blue eyes.

"Look what I made Ma!" Jeff says pushing his bangs out of his hazel eyes. I smile at him and lay a hand on his cheek.

"She's beautiful baby…and I'm gonna take her for myself because YOU were supposed to be a girl!" I say smiling through my tears.

"HEY!" Emily chimes in as she strolls over to check out her first niece. I lay a hand on her back as she oo's and aw's over the little girl.

"So, little brother do we get to know her name yet?" Emily asks as Woody holds the baby closer to his chest and she grabs onto one of the large brassy buttons on his dress coat.

Jeff smiles as he takes the baby's hand along with the hand of his new bride. He smiles shyly at me.

"Jordan Marie." He says and his young wife smiles.

"We really like that name." She says and I can now put a face to the voice I have talked to for the past year. I smile and wipe a few tears from my eyes as Woody regains some consciousness and hands the baby to me.

"Jordan." I say looking down into her face as she studies me. "It suits her." I say and kiss her light, baby soft hair. Suddenly, I hear the door open.

"HEY! Where the Hell's everyone at!? We got partyin' to do in a few hours!" I hear my second son's jovial, Boston accented voice call from the other room. He sounds just like my dad. I smile sadly as he pops his head around the corner. But Lord, does he look like his own father. He flashes me that thousand-watt smile an then his eyes pop open when he notices the baby in my arms.

"MA!" he says walking over to me and putting his hands on his hips. "You guys didn't even tell us 'we needed to have a talk' this time!" Chester says as a smile breaks out over his face.  I smile and smack his arm as he takes the baby from me.

"So? This is my little niece…" he says and wraps an arm around Jeff's neck and kisses his head.

"Nice work little boy! Now how exactly are you planning on feeding this thing? I hear the funny thing about internships in a recording studio, is that you don't get PAID for doing them." He says bouncing the baby in his arms. Jeff scratches the back of his head and laughs.

"Hey! Take it easy, those aren't break proof and that's an original, one of a kind! And…and…I got a job thank you very much, they gave me a job as a DJ on one of the most popular radio shows in LA!" He says and we all gasp.

"Oh honey that's great!" I say and hug him then his wife, Tara. Just as I pull away, I hear what one might assume is an angry heard of elephants, but I know is just my 2 young grandsons clambering through my living room. They blow through the room like a tornado, the younger, 2 year old Patrick, making a beeline for his Pop-pop. Woody lifts him easily with one arm and he wraps his legs and little arms around Woody's neck just like his father had. Tommy, only a year older, goes immediately to his daddy.

"Hey you little monkeys!" Chester says turning his son upside down and lightly tapping his belly like he's playing bongos. "Did you help Mommy carry anything in?" Chester says and looks to the doorway, where his wife stands angrily, holding their infant son, Matty under one arm and in the other two diaper bags and several toys. His eyes widen as he sets Tommy down and hurries to the door.

"Jesus Mary and Joseph, Kate! Why didn't you call for me!?" Chester says as he takes the toys and diaper bags from her. She just glares at him and carries Matty into the kitchen, passing him off to the closest person and then cracking her stiff back.

"Honey," I say setting my free hand on her arm. "I think we need to talk about temporarily shutting down the baby factory…trust someone who's been there." I say and Kate smiles at me appreciatively. Woody smacks Chester on the back and whispers to him,

"Just don't let her talk to any doctors alone or you might find yourself having a little of your…ahem…dignity removed." Woody says and winks at me. I roll my eyes and tell Kate I'll try and find a card for her.

"Aw! Is this the new baby!" She says noticing little Jordan for the first time. I just nod and place the baby in her arms.

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We arrived at the party for Woody's retirement. It was held outside under an enormous white tent in the park. The same park we had taken our kids to when they were young. When we entered the tent, there were hundreds of people there to congratulate Woody. They all stood and applauded when he walked in and he removed his hat and smiled shyly down at it. He still had a little of that farm boy charm in him, even if he was just shy of sixty years old. He looked around the room at all of his friends, and among them spotted some family. His brothers and sister all made it to the party. Even his 82 year old mother made it. He stooped to kiss her and was smacked on the back from behind. Calvin.

"Congratulations old man!" Calvin said smiling as Woody turned to him.

"Hey ! I can't believe you all made it!" Woody said as he hugged each of his siblings.

"Hey, well you named one of your kids after ME…why wouldn't you think I'd come?" His brother John, now in his 30's asked, wrapping an arm around me.

"Awww…sure we did sweetie." I said rolling my eyes as John searched the little crowd of family trying to figure out why the joke seemed to be on him.

"Hey, but I gave my kid your teddy bear!" Jeff said moving to the front of the little group to show off his wife and little girl.

"Hey! If I remember correctly," Emily said, hands on her hips, "I was the one who gave YOUR daughter John's teddy bear! Because it was MINE for awhile afterall." She said and everyone laughed and Jeff just shrugged his shoulders.

Woody greeted his friends and former co-workers before we sat down for some dinner. There were speeches made, roasts of Woody by his closest friends and then finally, it was Woody's turn to give a speech. Everyone raised their glasses and called for Woody to step up and speak. I knew that when he teased that he hadn't prepared a speech he was telling the truth. He never really did have a way with words, it was what came from his heart that was most sincere. He shyly stood from his seat, all of his family sitting beside him.

"Well…ah…first I just really wanna sincerely thank you all for coming today. I uhh…I value each and every one of you as family, and I uh…just thought you should know that…but ah,…I'm sorry, it takes me a little to get things like this out, I'm not real good with words…just ask my wife." He said and everyone chuckled as I nodded teasingly. "But really, I just…I treasure all of you. I really mean that. As many of you know…and…my mother can tell you," he said nodding to his mom seated on the other side of him from me. "Boston…wasn't my first choice of places to work when I left Wisconsin. But looking back at all of the friendships I made when I started at the 19…" He said and got a couple of hoots from his old buddies towards the back of the tent. "And…the woman I had to chase and…and finally talked into marrying me…" he said and took my hand gently beside him. "And seeing my four great lookin' kids all hear with my even better lookin' four little grandkids…I know that this was where I was meant to be." He said and I could feel my eyes filling up with tears. The kids all chuckled and Chester's little boy Tommy, made shy by all the laughter, hurried to Woody's side and he picked him up in his arms with a smile.

Woody turned back to the crowd and smiled at all the faces right up front. "I made lifelong friends of the quirkiest buncha folks I ever met." He said and pointed with his free hand down at the table where Lily, Garrett, Bug, Nigel and Peter all sat. Nigel, his hair shorter and nearly pure white, and his body and face filled out a little with age, making him look more distinguished, winked at Woody. Woody smiled back.

"You know…"Woody said looking briefly at me. "I was on a case in LA once…and….uh…this was before Jordan and I had ever dated, she was worried I might come under that California spell and just stay…so she, she got on a plane and flew 3000 miles just to make sure I was coming home. Home. That was the first time since I left Wisconsin…that…uhh…the picture in my head of home was my little one bedroom apartment with a view of a billboard advertising Guinness." He said and everyone laughed. "She told me…"Home is right behind you." He said and then looked along the table at me, then Emily beside me, holding Brian's hand under the table. John with Christine, and I thought I might have caught a glimpse of his eyes briefly twitching to John's hair with a smile, probably remembering as I often did, the lipstick incident. He looked to Chester, certainly no longer small enough to climb up on his shoulders, and to his little boy Patrick sitting happily in his lap. To Chester's wife Kate, gently rocking little Matt. To Tommy in his arms and finally to Jeff, little Jordan asleep in her carrier on the table. He looked along the other side, to his mom, his sister Chrissy, brother Matt, "Little" John. Calvin sitting proudly at the end of the table with his own wife and 2 kids. Then he sighed and looked up at the rest of the people in the room.

"And uhh…she was right. I turned around and there she was. And ever since that day…home has been wherever she and the rest of…my family" he said gesturing to our loaded table and the rest of the guests. "have been." He said. And everyone clapped. "It just so happens that home is more a state of mind than where you lay your hat…Jordan's ….father, Max Cavanaugh, God rest him… told me that one night over a couple beers at the Pogue. He said, "Woodrow, home isn't just where you lay your hat, home is wherever you walk in the door, and all you see are those faces that remember your own. And all those faces are smiling because they're happy to see you, and you know you're loved. That's the key to home Son," he said, "Not that shiny piece of metal you got hanging on your belt there." Max was a smart man." Woody said and I felt a few stray tears streak down my cheeks. Woody looked down at his oldest grandchild in his arms. He smiled at the only great-grandchild my dad got to know, and coincidentally, the only one who looked like him. Woody brushed Tommy's blonde bangs out of his soft, laughing eyes and smiled at him. He placed a kiss on his head and set him down in my lap.

"And…uhh…a lot of the good that's in me today is because of the things I learned from Max Cavanaugh. Through his examples, good and bad, I learned how to be a good cop. And I am eternally thankful for the experience of knowing him. And I am even more thankful to him for having such a beautiful daughter for me to marry." He said and everyone chuckled. "But uhh…honestly. Thank you. Everyone, for making me a part of this city and umm…always remembering my face, whether you were happy to see it or not." He said with a smile as everyone stood and clapped. He thanked everyone again for coming.

"Alright, alright enough with this stuffy, mushy atmosphere…I know a great bar we can head to," Woody called to the crowd and everyone raised their glasses and cheered. Woody glanced down the table at Chester who smiled. "And I'm pretty sure the owner won't mind renting the place out to us for the night." Woody said smiling and Chester rolled his eyes and nodded.

"Hey, so is that why you married mom? Cause you knew one day Grandpop would hand the bar over to his FAVORITE grandson and you would get free booze for the rest of your life, Pop?" Chester asked jovially as we all headed for the door. Woody patted Chester on the back and took little Patrick from his arms.

"Can't get nothing past you can I Ches?" Woody asked laughing as we headed to the cars and he lifted Patrick to his shoulders.

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I watch Woody, sitting at the bar with his feet up across two stools beside him, Patrick asleep on his lap, head resting gently against his granfather's still pretty flat stomach.

"You better not put any weight on or you won't be able to do that with any of the other grandbabies." I whisper as I wrap my arms around Woody's neck. He looks more comfortable now that his coat is thrown across the back of a chair in the corner and he no longer has his hat or tie on thanks to our rambunctious grandson, who is running around the room pretending to shoot people with his .22 caliber "pointer finger". Woody just smiles and lifts what's left of his beer to his lips and sips it. He rests his hand across Patrick's back and rubs gentle circles.

"I meant every word of what I said today, Jordan." He says and I sigh brushing Patrick's caramel colored hair out of his closed eyes.

"Oh sweetheart, you don't need to tell me that, hell, you didn't need to tell anyone in that room that. You're a good man." I say and kiss his familiar lips softly. "We knew where you belonged FAR before you realized it." I say and run my hand across his cheek. He smiles and Nigel calls for our attention.

I look over to where he's sitting and realize he's holding a camera. "For old times sake?" He says winking at Woody and I. I just smile and call all of the kids over with us.

Chester scoops up Tommy who still has Woody's hat on his head, and lifts him to his shoulders. He calls his wife over and she carries baby Matt over to the bar where Chester is already standing behind the counter with Tommy still above him. I sit down on the stool beside Woody and He spins, trying to not wake Patrick, and adjusts the small child to lay with his back against Woody's chest. Brian takes the stool beside me and Emily sits leans back into him as he wraps his arms around her. I look for John and Christine and they are already mirroring Emily and Brian's position on the stool beside Woody. Next to them, Jeff's wife sits on the stool holding a sleeping little Jordan while Jeff stands beside her stool with his arm around Tara. Woody's mother slowly makes her way up to the front, where she rightfully belongs, and stands between Woody and the stool where Christine is leaning into John. Calvin makes his way back behind the bar and his wife, son and daughter join him as he wraps an arm around his wife and the other around his daughter. Matt, Chrissy and little John Hoyt also join the crowd as Nigel backs up to get the whole group in the picture.

"Alright! Are we ready!? Saaaaaay Pogue Mahone!" He says and our kids laugh, getting the joke as the flash on Nigel's camera brightens the room.

What's Pogue Mahone mean, Daddy?" Tommy asks from Chester's shoulders where he is still trying to get Woody's completely oversized hat to fit his head. Chester chuckles and shrugs his shoulders at me as if to say, 'he's gonna figure it out eventually.' And sighs.

He spins Tommy down off his shoulders and holds the little guy's ear to his mouth.

Tommy's eyes go wide and he puts a hand over his mouth and laughs. I can't help but ask what his father's told him.

"What he say baby?" I ask and Tommy smiles.

"It means 'kiss my ass!' " he says and giggles as Chester puts him down and everyone laughs as he again tries to right his grandfather's hat.

"Hey! You could get arrested for impersonating an officer there, chief!" Woody says taking the hat off of Tommy's head as everyone gathers around for the last drinks.

He replaces the hat on Tommy's head trying with little success to get it to fit.

"But not if I'm gonna be a cop…like..like you Pop-pop!" Tommy says and Woody smiles proudly and winks at Emily.

"I'm sure you will be buddy, I'm sure you will be." Woody says as he lifts Tommy onto the bar and Garrett presses the button for Finnegan's Wake on the jukebox. We all gathered around to watch as Chester takes Tommy by the hands and dances him across the bar as everyone claps in time to the music.