I just recently saw the episode "One of the Boys" and...I didn't like it as much as I thought I would. I mean, it was okay, just not what I was expecting. So, here's my take on Lincoln's life with 10 brothers. Enjoy.

The Loud House: Mid-Afternoon

To the outside world, it would just seem like another fall day; the sky is cloudy with a few dark spots, the trees have brown leaves falling off with every passing moment, and the cold air permeating the skin of passers-by, bringing on the incentive of wearing a coat or getting goosebumps. In Royal Oak, the neighborhood was quiet, seemingly unassuming and looking like your average all-American neighborhood.

Except...things were a tad different in the Loud House.

In the living room is where things take a different turn.

Rather than a loud, (no pun intended, that's Lane's job) raucous gathering of brothers engaging in rough play, heavy guitar screeches, and smack talk toward one another, only five of the brothers were present: Loni, Luke, Lane, Lynn, and of course, the white haired middle child himself, Lincoln.

"Uh, hey guys," Lincoln, sitting on the far left end of the couch, turned toward the readers. "Things are kinda heavy right now."

While four of the siblings didn't look affected by anything, it was Lynn Jr. who was the most changed; the brunet sports player currently had disheveled hair, his '1' jersey torn, and was holding a pack of frozen vegetables up to his right eye.

He sighed. "Goddamn."

Loni perked up from the armchair on the side next to the kitchen threshold. "Whoa, Lynn! You okay, bro?"

Lynn gritted his teeth and lowered his ice pack. "Really? I'm sitting here with a black eye, all messed up, and you're asking if I'm okay? The hell do you think?!"

"Alright, alright, sorry, sheesh," Loni retorted, holding his hands up in surrender, making his sunglasses fall over his eyes. "When did this, like, solar eclipse happen?"

Lane, sitting on the far right armrest of the main couch, surveyed Lynn. "Man, did that guy lay his best punch-line on ya. Hehe, get it?"

Crickets...crickets.

"Alright, too soon. Anyway, that was something back there, wasn't it?"

"It was total bullshit is what it was!" Lynn exclaimed. "I coulda taken him!"

"First off," Luke began, laying on the floor and tuning his acoustic guitar. "Calm down, little dude, slow your roll. Second," Luke stands, holding his guitar by the neck with his left hand, "you better be damned grateful for what we did back there." He emphasizes his sentence by pointing at Lynn.

"Like I said Luke, I was doing just fine!"

Lincoln, observing all of this, turns toward the reader yet again. "Yeah, I probably should fill you in. You see, it was just a few hours ago..."

Flashback

Wagner Park

*SWISH*

That was the sound of Lynn Loud, sports aficionado, scoring yet another basket of nothing but net!

Loki decided that since his brothers had done a whole bunch of favors for him already, that they would hang out at the park, since there was nothing else to really do. While the rest of the brothers were off doing what they do best (Lars under the shade with his poetry, Lexx declaring himself king of the world, Lane telling bad jokes to girls, Loni chatting up multiple girls with his fashion knowledge, etc.), Lynn decided to play a pickup game of basketball, with him vs. 4 other guys.

Currently, none of the four other guys were able to keep up with Lynn, much to Lynn's gain.

Lynn paraded all over the court, bellowing, "None of you can even f**k with me!"

The other four opposing players scowled at the braggadocious brunet.

It was their ball now; as they proceeded down court, passing the ball around, making sure Lynn couldn't keep track of where it was going, sending him in circles.

"Come on now, ladies, you gonna shoot and brick, or what?" Lynn pressed.

As one of them tried to shoot, Lynn immediately smacked it out of his hands. "Get that weak shit outta here, bro!"

One of them, fed up with the bragging attitude, stepped forward and knocked Lynn to the ground, sending him to the hard concrete. "What the hell?!"

"I'm sick of your shit, asshat!"

Lynn, taken aback, stood up and reasserted himself. "Alright, what's up then, motherf**ker?!"

The boy charged at him, swinging his fists, and catching Lynn in his eye. Momentarily dazed, Lynn charged back and punched the other boy in the forehead, sending him back a few steps. Lynn, not letting up, let out a twirling kick into the other boys' side. The other boy tackled Lynn into a court pole, punching him in the stomach all the time being.

At one of the trees away from the court, Luke, who was calmly strumming the tunes of Seals and Crofts, looked and saw the debacle unfolding onto the basketball court.

He set his guitar on his shoulder and ran as fast as he could to a park bench, where Loki and Loni were situated. "Dudes, dudes, dudes-"

"The hell's with you, Luke?" Loki asked snidely.

"Dudes, Lynn is getting his ass kicked!"

"Wait, what?! He's actually getting kicked in his butt?" Loni asked. Loki rolled his eyes.

"No dipshit! He's literally in a fight." Loki turned back toward Luke. "When did this start happening?"

"I don't know, a few seconds ago! Anyway, bros, we gotta go help him!"

"Loni, go get Lane and Link and meet us at the court, we got some business to take care of," Loki declared, cracking his knuckles.

Meanwhile, Lynn and the other boy were on the ground, with Lynn kneeling over him and punching him in the jaw. After 3 punches, the other boy rips Lynn's jersey and punches him in the chin, knocking Lynn off.

Lynn bled from his mouth and the other boy now stood over him, getting ready to kick him in the face; however, just before he could, he felt himself getting put in a chokehold and dragged, with a voice screaming out "Get off our brother!"

Lynn looked up and saw Loki, Luke, Loni and Lane, throwing the other kid to the ground; the four brothers began simultaneously punching and kicking him; Lane was even stomping on the boy's stomach.

Lincoln, witnessing and not wanting to take part in the violence, walked up to Lynn. "Lynn?"

The brunet turned toward his younger brother, his right eye blackened. "Oh, hey 'Stink-oln'."

"You don't look so good."

"Pssh, don't worry about it, you should see the other guy." Lynn stood up and the two watched as the older brothers were still unleashing hell on Lynn's aggressor.

Lincoln winced at the display. "You think that's enough?"

Luke, Lane and Loni ceased after a few minutes, while Loki held him on the ground. "You ever mess with one of my brothers again, I'll literally turn you into a f***in' pretzel, you got it?"

The boy, who was bruised and beaten up, nodded. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'll leave you alone!"

"Good. Let's keep it that way!"

"Guys," Lane interjected. "We should probably make like eggs and scramble now."

Loki's eyebrows rose. "Shit, you're right! We gotta get the young twerps and bounce!"

And with that, the Loud brothers were gathered up, got into Vanzilla, and left swiftly.

Present

"And that's how that happened," Lincoln finished. "Now, we're stuck with this."

"Oh yeah, you were doing just fine, with the black eye, bloody mouth, should I go on?" Luke said.

Lynn scowled. "Why did you guys even care anyways?!"

"Because we're bros, bros stick together!" Luke retorted, also donning a scowl.

"I. Can. Take. Care. Of. Myse-"

Lane interrupted the two. "Hold it, hold it, hold it, you two! Let's everybody cool down, alright! It's over! Let's chill the f**k out!

The jokester didn't swear very often (except in some of his more...explicit jokes), but when he did, it was serious.

Luke sat back down on the floor and Lynn turned toward Lincoln. "And you; what were you doing there, Link?"

Lincoln gave no answer.

Lynn sighed. "Little bros should never, ever have to see their big bros hurt. You probably don't even think I'm cool anymore. I bet none of you don't."

"You're wrong," Lincoln started. "You're still our sports loving, still cool brother. Nothing can change that, not even seeing you hurt, y'know?"

"I guess. Thanks, Link."

"That's the spirit," Loni announced.

"Alrighty then, that was getting a little too dramatic there. How about we," Lane took out a bright light bulb from his hammerspace, "brighten the mood, huh? Get it?"

"Seriously, brah?" Luke began, "You didn't even try that time."

Lane rolled his eyes. "Oh f**k you, I thought it was funny."

Loni chuckled.

Lane smirked at Luke. "See, Loni thought it was hilarious."

"That's not saying much, the dude will laugh at anything."

"I'm right here, you know?" Loni spoke up, slightly offended.

"We know." Luke, Lane, Lynn and Lincoln sniggered.

The five brothers saw Loki descending from the stairs, a blank look on his face. "Hey, twerps. Just got read the Riot Act from Mom and Dad."

"Wait, they were reading a play about a riot? Man, they make plays about everything," Loni questioned.

"I-I'm not even gonna dignify that with a response. That is how literally stupid that sounded." Loki sat down between Lynn and Lincoln.

"What'd they say?" Lynn asked. "We're not grounded, are we?"

The eldest blonde brother shook his head. "Nah, nothing on that, just Mom and Dad going, 'You boys should be ashamed of yourselves, getting into fights like that', and 'I expected better. But did you win?'"

The brothers laughed at Loki's impression of their parents.

Lynn looked down at the floor. "Uh, look guys, I-I'm sorry that-"

"No problems, Lynn. You can't shut us out that easy. We're brothers," Loki stated.

Then, the present of the boys announced simultaneously. "And brothers stick together! Bros for life!"

Lincoln turned toward the readers. "See, when you have a set of siblings, no matter what happens, it all works out in the end."

"Now who's up for pizza?" Loni questioned. The boys nodded and looked to Loki for approval.

"I could go for some; I'm literally starved. Just gimme a sec." Loki was typing on the keyboard of his phone. "'Sup, Beebe, what you doin' tomorrow, gurl?'"

"I betcha can't wait to get a 'pizza' that, can ya?" Lane joked, making Loki and Luke chuckle.

"That was still kinda forced, Lane," Lincoln commented.

"Painful is what it was," Lynn added.

"Oh shove it, 'Stink-oln.'"

How was that?

Yes, they swear; for God's sake, they're pre-teen/teen boys!

(P.S. I know genderbent Bobby is called Bebe, but I just think 'Beebe' fits better.)

Read and Review.