I have no idea where this came from. No I actually do have an idea, but I have no idea where this is going. It will probably be another collection of unrelated oneshots because sometimes the plot bunny comes out and I need to write that bunny down, one way or another. The fact that most plot bunnies come from songs I love is completely irrelevant.

All the strangers look like family

All the family looks so strange

The only constant I am sure of

Is this accelerating rate of change

Peter Gabriel Ft. Melanie Gabriel - Downside Up (2000)

Downside Up Upside Down

The cool breeze coming from the ocean gently stirred the water surface, creating creases in the otherwise flat blue slab that extended from there to Europe, uninterrupted. The sun was high in the sky, warming the beach in front of the house to the perfect temperature for a sand castle.

His wife was taking a nap, but he had heard his daughter fumbling around in her room upstairs, maybe he could persuade Lily to join him on the beach. It was still too early to splash around in the ocean. The late March weekend they had decided to take and drive all the way to the Hamptons to enjoy a little bit of family time away from the city delivered temperatures incompatible with messier fun time, but he could go with spending some time with a bucket and a plastic shovel with Lily building whatever fantastic world she wanted.

Careful not to disturb Kate, he walked upstairs to their daughter's room and knocked on the door. "Lily? Can I come in?"

"Yes Dad!" came her enthusiastic voice.

He found her on the bed reading a book. "Listen, it's warm outside and Mom is still asleep, want to join me on the beach and build a sand castle?"

She smiled, closed her book and hopped off the bed. "Sure Dad! Get the bucket, I'll find the shovel."

Ten minutes later they had spread their beach towels on the warm sand and were planning the design of the castle before they started digging for the more compact sand that could sustain itself. They worked hard for a good hour before they were satisfied with the result of their labor, so they took a break and lay on their towels, looking up at the sky.

"Wow Dad, the sky is really blue here."

He moved his neck so he could look at her. "Yes it is. It was one of the things that made me buy the house here and not closer to the town."

"Mom didn't help you choose it?"

He smiled. "No Lily, I hadn't met your mom yet when I bought this house. Alexis helped me though. She wanted a house with a private beach and a patio so she could play outside even with the rain. I wanted a quiet place far away from other people's homes with a private beach. It wasn't tough to choose this place. You like it, don't you?"

"Dad, I love this place. Just as I love the Grampa's cabin and the loft, you know it!"

"Yeah Little Butterfly, I know you love home."

Lily stood up and moved her towel closer to his own, then snuggled into his side with her head on his shoulder. "Why do you call me Little Butterfly? I'm not little anymore, and I'm not a butterfly."

He smiled and kissed the top of her head. "You know, when you were very, very little and still comfortable in Mommy's tummy, sometimes you moved around, stretched and kicked, and Mommy always said it felt like a little butterfly would touch her and tickle. That's why we call you Little Butterfly, sometimes."

"Oh… like with the new babies? When she says they kick but I can't feel it?"

"Exactly like with the new babies. You see, in the next few months they will grow and they will become stronger and you will feel them when they move. You will see them too, you know?"

"Really? Did I move a lot?"

Castle chuckled and pulled his baby girl against his chest. "Oh yes, you loved doing your somersaults and kicking Mommy's liver, or sitting on her bladder so she had to pee every five minutes!"

Lily looked up at him with a confused look printed on her face. "Bladder?"

"It's the organ in your tummy that stores all your pee before you go to the toilet. You know when you really need to pee? That's your bladder when it's full. And you loved sitting on Mommy's bladder."

"Why? Was it comfortable?"

"I have absolutely no idea. Maybe it was just handy, you know… space gets cramped when a baby grows, maybe you had little space to move and you found it comfortable to sit like that, I don't know. Who knows what went through that little brain of yours!"

Lily took a deep breath while she toyed with the hem of his t-shirt. "I wonder too. Mommy seems so tired all the time though, was she so tired when I was in her tummy too?"

Castle smiled. "Yeah, she was, but not for too long. After a while, she got her energy back. She said she felt like someone had changed the batteries."

"You think she'll feel better?"

"I seriously hope so, she gets grumpy when she's tired and can't drink coffee."

Lily chuckled. "Oh yes, sometimes I think she loves coffee more than she loves you!"

At that, they both laughed, loud, and she curled up against his ribs so fast her knees nudged against his liver, hard. It made him cough and the sudden strain on the damaged muscles of the bullet sent a sharp pain shooting through his chest and upper back. "Ough, Lily, calm down a little bit, Daddy's chest hurts a little bit."

His little girl suddenly stilled. "I'm sorry Daddy!" She quickly pushed herself up on her elbows and pressed her lips on his shoulder, above the circular scar of the bullet hole. "There, I kissed it better. Still hurts?"

He shook his head, trying to conceal the still lingering discomfort in order to make her feel better. His Little Butterfly knew that the wound still gave him issues from time to time, and that Kate had problems with her own, and she was very self conscious with the way she moved around her parents, but it hurt seeing her always keeping herself in check, keeping calm, she never behaved like a normal child her age. Even Alexis had always been a quiet child had been more active, running around playing and making up stories. Lily, while being quite rambunctious when she wanted to, was much more reserved. Kate kept telling him that she used to be the same at her age, and Jim had confirmed it multiple times, to try and alleviate his doubts, but still it felt odd for him.

Lily was a quiet one. And according to Kate, quiet ones could be the worst.

She was inquisitive, curious, always asking questions and seeking answers for all her doubts. With time, there was a chance she'd end up like her Mommy, working through high school to buy a motorbike. Not that she would need to, but despite being so young, she already showed the same kind of stubbornness that had made him fall in love with Kate.

Those two were so alike, and Lily looked up at Kate like some sort of god-like being, it made his heart swell each time he caught the two of them snuggling on the couch, watching a movie or simply having a chat about this and that. Their tiny baby girl that had blasted in their lives when they had nearly lost everything, turned everything inside out and changed everything they had considered a staple of their being.

Lily had turned their lives downside up and upside down and from the moment they had learned she was coming, nothing had been the same. Not to mention when the twins would come, four months from now.

Castle was lost in his thoughts, looking up at the gathering gray clouds, when Lily spoke again. "Dad?"

"Yes?"

"Do you think the babies in Mommy's tummy are girls like me?"

He looked down at her. "I don't know sweetie. The doctor said we can know for sure next week, we'll see then. Why? You want two little sisters?"

She shrugged her little shoulders then turned on her back, her head on his shoulder. "I don't know… Angie said that her little brother has boy cooties and she doesn't want him near her toys. Girls don't have cooties, right?"

Angie was a girl she had befriended at school, a year older and with a younger brother, who was six months old, and the little girl had both parents that worked full time. Even before her brother had come, they had little time and they had to rely on a nanny. The same nanny that was now working with two kids and not only one. As used as she was to receive all the attention from people around them, Angie was now jealous that Mark was in the spotlight.

Smiling, he twirled a lock of her hair through his fingers. "Angie is just a little jealous, Lily. Her little brother absorbed all her parents' energies for a while and they didn't have so much time for her as they used to. And you know what boy cooties are?"

"What, Dad?"

"Kisses, snuggles, cuddles and hugs. And you like them, right?"

She laughed and turned again to hug him. "Yes, I love them."

"Then even if the babies are both boys, I bet you're going to be just fine. The twins will take our time, because they will be very tiny when they will come, and they will need our help to do everything, to eat, get dressed and change their diapers, because they can't do that on their own, not until they will be older. But don't ever think that we love them more than we love you, okay?"

"I can help, right? I know I'm little but I can do stuff. I can help!"

"Of course you can sweetie! You'll be officially in charge of dispensing your girl cooties to them when Mommy is too tired!"

"And with girl cooties mean kisses, snuggles, cuddles and hugs?" she inquired.

"And some education. You know, boys can be gross sometimes, they'll need someone to teach them how to behave and be polite!"

She nodded and looked down at her hands, fisted in the thin material of his shirt. "Will you teach me to read? So I can read to them?"

"Well, of course I will!" He looked at his watch. "Come on, let's make tea and wake Mommy, we can start altogether. Like the idea?"

God, his baby girl was growing up so fast, time seemed to fly so fast he could barely see the change as it happened. One blink there it goes, she had grown an inch, changed her mind about what she wanted to be when she grew up, and now she wanted to learn how to read so she could read stories to his little twin brothers.

And as he watched as she climbed on the bed and snuggled close to Kate to gently wake her with a barrage of kisses, he could only wonder how much their lives will change each day from now on. What would happen tomorrow? Next week, when they had the appointment to determine the sex of the twins? Or in four months, when due time would come. He had no idea, but with them, the journey to discover what life had still in store for them would be the greatest journey of his life.

Downside up, upside down

Take my weight off the ground

Falling deep in the sky

Slipping in the unknown