"Oscar is dead. Cade got him before he got to you," stated Shepard, to which Jane simply nodded trying to erase memory of that moment, like so much of hers had been erased before. "But Roman has been moving heaven and earth since you disappeared trying to track down Cade," she continued. "I promise you that he will pay for what he did… And Remi, I know this has been a lot for one day, a lot of information, but it's not all. There's still one more thing I need to show you."

Jane looked over at Roman who gave her a half smile, hands in his pockets, shrugging his shoulders. She was already overwhelmed, she wasn't sure how much more she could take, but curious, Jane watched as Shepard walked back to the car. What else could possibly be swung at her? What more? Was this what "Phase II" was all about? Jane managed to hold back a gasp as she watched Shepard emerge from the car, a little girl in her arms, still half asleep. Walking up to her, Shepard introduced her, "Remi, this is Evie," she said, gently tickling the girl's stomach, to wake her up.

So Phase II was a girl, a child. Jane didn't like where this was going, didn't like the ball of muck forming in her throat. What was happening? She wasn't even sure she wanted to know anymore. The small child, who couldn't be more than four, slowly rubbed her eyes, blinking a few times as she cocked her head in Jane's direction and asked, confused, "Mama?"

Jane hadn't thought that she could hate herself more than she had until that moment, that moment in which the single two-syllable word had echoed deep into her soul. Because it was during that singular moment in which she remembered who she was, who she had been. It was in that moment in which she realised just how much she hated that woman.

It was a younger version of Evelyne who called out, "Mama byebye," her small fists opening and closing in her direction, as Oscar had walked away with their daughter in his arms. And she had simply stood there, watching them go, seemingly unmoved, like this wasn't goodbye. Like she wasn't leaving. Like she wasn't erasing them.

"Why does it have to be you?" Oscar had asked her before she'd left, "What if you don't come back? What happens then?"

Her heart clenched in her chest, making it difficult to breath. It hurt that she had left, but it hurt even more that she hadn't remembered. Jane didn't understand much, didn't remember much, but she understood that. She had completely erased her until know.

Jane looked at the girl, her breaths in shallow intakes as she tried to contain herself. This was too much, simply too much. She couldn't do it anymore. She was so tired, so tired of fighting. She couldn't do it anymore, but when the girl in the yellow pyjamas extended her arms towards her, Jane immediately, without questioning a thing, caught onto her, bringing Evelyne close to her chest. Like she hadn't just been shot, like she hadn't just been stitched up by her brother, like she hadn't just received a blood transfusion in the car ride over here. At that moment, none of it mattered. She couldn't feel a thing apart from the pounding of her beating heart.

Just like she had known how to fight, known how to shoot, how to speak Chinese, she knew how to do this. The small, warm hands wrapped around her neck as Jane tightened her grip. She couldn't control the flow of tears running down her face, leaving a distinct wet mark on back of the child's top, as everything finally caught up to her. Everyone was gone. Oscar was dead. Mayfair was dead. Her whole team hated her. Weller despised her. She had planned for this; she had wanted this. She had left her brother, her mother, her fiancé. She had erased her family, abandoned her daughter. How could she possibly fix all of this? How could she possibly make this right?

She was so tired.

As if this wasn't enough, as if she hadn't already been given enough, there still remained so many unanswered questions, still so many unknowns. She was still in the dark. But they didn't matter anymore, nothing mattered anymore, she just wanted to stay like this forever, in this embrace and never let go. She didn't care anymore. Without giving it a second thought, Jane turned around and walked away. She distanced herself under Shepard's watchful eye, the woman's hand resting on Roman's shoulder urging him to stay by her side, to leave Jane to reconnect with the child she had given life to, the child she had just reconnected with.

Jane couldn't say how long she'd been sitting on the curb, in this close embrace, but her eyes had now dried out. She was reconnecting with the feeling of the small, warm body close to hers, a feeling that felt so familiar, and at the same time so foreign. Jane couldn't say how long she would have stayed like that, if it hadn't been for the fingers trailing the features on her face, the bruise on her cheek, if it hadn't been for the fingers tracing the tattoo on her neck. She forced a hopeful smiled as she looked at Evie, her green eyes a mirror to her own, and the child stated, with more sorrow than should be allowed for a four year old, "I missed you, mama."

And just like that, Jane broke into a million pieces, stuck between the person she was, between what she'd done, and the person she wanted to be, that she was going to be. Jane bit her lip as her eyes threatened to overflow again. Taking a deep breath in, she managed to force a smile, and to utter out, "I've been gone a long time haven't I?"

Evie nodded looking down at her hands, her fingers playing with each other, distracting.

Jane cuddled her closer still, whispering in her daughter's ear, "I missed you more than anything, but I'm here now, okay?" She looked up in Shepard and Roman's direction, as she added still in a hushed whisper, only for her daughter to hear, "And I'm not going anywhere."

"I missed you," added Evie in a muffled cry as she buried her face in her mother's shirt.

"I'm sorry Evie, I'm so sorry you have me as a mother," whispered Jane as she rocked her daughter in her arms. "I'm sorry," she whispered, rocking her daughter back towards sleep. And she was, she couldn't possibly begin to explain how sorry she was.

It was with a sleeping child in her arms that Jane, walked back up to Roman and Shepard, both of them now leaning over the hood of the car, waiting.

"You must have a lot of questions," Shepard told her.

But she didn't, not really. Only one.

She had been given so many answers today. She had woken up not knowing who she was, her own name, now she had been given two. She had woken up alone, now she had a family. She had a brother, a mother, a daughter. She was a mother. She had been given so much information today, but what she really wanted to know was why. Why was everything happening to her?

"Why did it have to be me?" she asked, "Why did it have to be this way?"

"It was the only way it was really going to work."

"But why? Why are we doing all of this? What's Orion and Phase II?"

"You'll know everything in time," simply stated Shepard.

"This isn't good enough!" exclaimed Jane.

"It's going to have to be enough," Shepard answered, as she motioned Jane to hand over Evie, "It's almost dawn, I can't be out in the open like this. You need to get back to the FBI."

The FBI. Jane had completely forgotten about the FBI.

"What?" exclaimed Roman.

"Tell them you were kidnapped by Cade, tell them that you escaped. It still might be possible to salvage this op," explained Shepard, taking a step towards the pair.

"What? No. No way," said Jane as she turned her back to the woman who claimed to be her mother, shielding her daughter from her.

"She just came back," exclaimed Roman protectively.

"The mission isn't over yet. We need her over there, at the FBI."

"Do you understand what I've been through, what I've had to endure to get back here. I just got back, I just got my daughter back."

"I really don't think you want to argue on this with me, Remi."

"I'm out. I'm out, okay?" Jane exclaimed. She motioned to the girl and herself, adding, "We're out. I can't do this anymore. I just can't. It was a bad idea! A bad idea, okay? Why did it have to me?"

"Remi, I know this is hard, and I know you don't remember, but you wanted this, you wanted it like this," tried to explain her brother.

"I don't believe you. I can't. I can't leave her again."

"What you need to do is finish what you started. You need to understand that when you aren't with us, you're against us, and I really don't think you want to be against us right now." Shepard motioned to the two men that had patted her down before their meeting to come closer, "This is bigger than you, this is bigger than all of us."

"I'm ag- This is unbelievable," exclaimed Jane. "This can't be happening right now."

"Noooo!" Jane screamed as they took her daughter from her arms, and the girl fell silent, looking over the broad man's shoulder, watching her mother cry out for her, with the distance between them increasing.

"All the pieces are almost into play, you won't have to live this double life much longer," added Shepard.

Falling to her knees, Jane sobbed, "Why are you doing this to me?"

Roman knelt beside his sister, a hand on her back he whispered, "I know you're still in there, you can do this."

"I'm not abandoning her again," Jane added with a sniffle.

"You didn't abandon her, Remi," said Roman calmly, "You left her with her dad. We were there. She didn't miss of anything and she won't miss of anything now. "

Jane shook Roman's hand off her back, "She missed me, Roman! She missed her mother," she exclaimed, angry, at herself, at Shepard, at her brother, at Oscar. Oh how mad she was at Oscar for letting her do this, for not making her stop, not fighting enough so that she didn't let them inject her with that poison. Oh how mad she was at him for making her kill him.

"I just left them," she added more softly, almost resigned.

Pain is a dream. Except this wasn't. This hurt a hell of a lot more than anything else she'd endured at the hands of the CIA.

Shepard added, "You used to understand that the mission was for her-"

"She's my daughter, my own damn flesh and blood."

"You understood that the mission was more important than a few birthdays."

"I don't understand it now."

"But you will. Maybe not today, maybe not tomorrow, but eventually, you will."

It was Roman that interjected, "What if she keeps Evie with her?"

"And how do you suppose she explains it when she comes back three months later with a 4 year old daughter?"

"Maybe I just found her," tried Jane.

"Yeah? Just wandering around in the streets close to the headquarters? Come on, we need to stick with the mission. It's almost dawn now, I can't be seen here, I need you to go. Now."

"And how about I don't tell them?" tried Jane, her daughter now completely out of eye-sight, the car door closed.

"How long do you think that will last? You think they won't find out? I trained you better than this."

"She tells them Cade had her," stated Roman. Both brother and sister looked to Shepard, hopeful, and when Shepard didn't turn him down he added, "Kane kidnapped Evie, tried to use her as psychological torture. The sight of Evie is what prompted Remi to escape, to save her daughter."

Shepard nodded, "That just might work."

It was back at the compound that Roman could finally talk to Shepard. He was angry, furious. "Why did you bring Evie? It was never part of the plan. You knew she'd react that way."

"Yeah. I was counting on it. Trust me, Roman, having her with Evie will pay on the long run. Something is still off with her, I can't shake the feeling, but reuniting them will be good for her."

"But will it be good for Evie?"

"She's still her mother, Roman. Plus, she hates me, but she trusts you now Roman, and this is exactly what I want. She's different than before, I just need you to make sure she understands what side she needs to be on in this. You need to make sure of it."

Okay guys, be gentle. This is my first attempt at Blindspot. I found Jane to be incredibly difficult to write. She's such a badass, but so broken at the same time. I don't know if I managed to dose it, right. I'm still on the fence about where I am taking this right now, so let me know your thoughts!

Also, if anyone is interested, I would really like someone to beta the chapters before I post them. Correcting grammar, story, character development, whatever you feel like really. Anyhow, if anyone's interested, PM me.

Also, thanks for reading, and hope you enjoyed. Blindspot might just be my new obsession.