The following is a bit of a take on Video Game Confessions which belongs to the comedic genius of Doug Walker of Channel Awesome. Pokémon belongs to Nintendo and the Pokémon Company. And to make this more fun to you the reader, I suggest putting on the theme from Video Game Confessions ( /watch?v=tCrrZ1NnCuM )

Author's Note: Thank thatsmybusiness43 for suggesting Pikachu! This is both a prequel and epilogue to the Ash chapter. ;)


Anime Confessions – Pikachu


You're introduced to a young man of African descent about 5'9'' with a lean frame. His hair spiked and black with eyes of light gray. He wears a typical outfit of a bartender for a fancy restaurant.


"This is Ryo. Ryo works in the seven star restaurant known as the Tori Dragon Palace (which is two blocks away from the Pixel Palace). There, some of anime's most popular celebrities pop in to have a drink. Sometimes, they share stories, and even secrets. Because—as we all know—what the bartender hears is confidential... isn't it?"


Pikachu


Now this last meeting with Pikachu happened before Ash quit the anime being sometime before Kalos ended. So here I am working the bar late at night and in walks in Pikachu. Now Pikachu does come with Ash, but Pikachu often comes on his own. When he does, he always comes with two girls in his arms. This time it's Dawn's Buneary and a Jynx. So I load up the stools for him and Buneary to sit and reach the bar.

"Hey bartender, make me an electric pisco sour!" He said in his cocky tone and shit-eating grin.

Ugh. Pikachu was a big star. And off the set, he was bit of an asshole. He's nice to everyone to his universe, but he's an ass everywhere else. At least he treats women well enough. I make the Pika-douche his drink, and I ask him how it is going.

"How's it going? I'm a damn superstar! Those Yo-Kai bitches ain't got nothing on me!" Pikachu said being a braggart.

Pikachu pretty much doesn't care to win the league. Unlike Ash, Pikachu is okay with the repetitive plotlines and shitty writing. He's in it for the cash, the prick. He is a big star being the face of Pokémon. The bastard had his own private jet, mansion, and a harem of women at his beck and call. That harem that both human and Pokémon! For Arecus's sake, he's so wealthy he purchased Five Island. You know that place from the Sevii Isles. He downs his drink and asked me if I will be watching Sun and Moon. His Jynx friend winced at the mention. I told the prick-achu no and he laughed at me.

"Hah! You older fans were nothing but a commodity anyway. But let me let you in on a little secret." He said to me as I poured Buneary another drink. "You and fans like you don't matter. It was my idea to screw over the ending for Kalos. The XY writers wanted him to win, so I vetoed it and got the BW writers to handle the ending."

And I was there dumbfounded by this revelation and while I was getting angry with him, I kept it under wraps. However, I asked if he was in on it for the ending of Sinnoh and Unova. He sneers and says of it was all planned since Jotho that Ash would be doomed to fail.

"Please, I was in it with the writers. Ash gets the badges, go to the league, and fails. Ash will go to a new region, gain a new bitch, and a new paycheck comes in my pocket. Rinse and repeat." Pikachu said to me still laughing in my face. "And even if you don't watch, the next set of shit kids will."

However, he went too far. I don't think Buneary liked him calling her trainer a bitch and gave him an Ice Beam to the face freezing him to his stool.

"Piplup was right. You are a jerk! We're though." Buneary said leaving the bar in a huff.

Jynx gives Pikachu a Mega Punch to the nads and I had a smug look of my own on his face as Pikachu got up off the floor.

"Who needs you, Buneary? I'll just get a Lopunny!" He said staggering out of the bar.

Overall, he was a complete tool. When Ash quit the anime, Pikachu didn't go with him. He was the only Pokémon of Ash's to stay. Turns out Buneary had spilled the details on our conversation to Ash and Serena. Let's just say, Ash and Pikachu are NOT on speaking terms. On bright side, I caught a Jynx! Heh! Totally worth the Mega Punch to the shoulder!

You see a lot of strange things as a bartender, see a lot strange things at the Tori Dragon. So, I see a lot of strange things as a bartender at the Tori Dragon, and that isn't no lie. Swear to it!


(A/N: Yes, I will admit this one was a bit dickish, but it needed to be done. For you Pikachu fans, Ash has the stunt-double Pikachu who treats Ash a whole lot better. Edit 10.13 Final Edit)