Two Men and a Thorn Bush
By tHe InSaNe OnE
AN- Back again with a small bit of stupidity while I work on another fic. ^_^ You shall hear more about that later! Anyway, thank you SO much for all the great reviews on "Understanding". I never expected so many! ^_^ You guys are so good to me! I never can thank you all enough!
Dedicated to my reviewers from "Understanding"; more specifically: Emmithar, Elladan, Achika-chan, RainyDayz, Daylight, Sheleigh, Lady_Marmalada, Here Kitty, DSRockStar, Erin21, Rivendells_Mistress, Kawaii BlueBear, shauna, evil spapple pie, Rain Minstrel, Freakizimi, Kaeera, HobbitsRFun, Ciria, melodie, Nili, shirebound, mbali, Captain Thorongil, Sue, Eileen, HaloGatomon, Carrie-n-Emmithar (who happens to be just Carrie), and Celestra.
Also dedicated to Winky-wan Kenobi the Jedi-house elf, and Aralondwen for laughing at it and convincing me to post it!
~*~
"No."
"Oh, come on."
"No, I refuse."
"Legolas......don't be a wimp!"
"I am not being a wimp. I am being sane."
Legolas peered over the cliff skeptically. So it wasn't quite a skeptical glance. It was a look that stated quite firmly 'there is no way in hell, Estel'. The drop was probably a good twenty feet, if not more. He backed up a few feet and turned to his human friend, shaking his head. There wasn't anyway that the young man was going to pull him into this one. Uh-uh, no way. He would have to see a herd of oliphaunts first.
"Elladan, Elrohir and I do this all the time! We haven't ever been injured......" Estel paused for a second. "Badly."
"Estel, there is no way you could get me to do that!" Legolas exclaimed, waving a hand towards the end of the cliff. "I don't really care what you and your brothers do for 'fun'. I call that insanity, and I do not wish to take part in it!"
Estel pouted sullenly, "You put such a damper on things. It's not insanity! I've made it plenty of times!"
"How many times is 'plenty'?" Legolas questioned critically. Estel looked like a young child pouting the way he was. How could he actually be considered grown? He was twenty two and acting like he was a third of his age.
"At least thirty times!"
"And how many times have you tried?"
Aragorn's face fell slightly at the thought of that but the look soon vanished. "That doesn't matter! I'm a human! My brother's have only missed once or twice! Elladan missed twice because I grabbed onto him half-way down both times, and Elrohir missed because he slipped!"
"Why am I having a very hard time believing you?"
"I don't have any idea."
"Remind me, why aren't they with us on this little.....endeavor?"
"They went out with the scouting party. The two of them, Glorfindel, and two others; hunting, scouting, having fun; unlike us."
"Why didn't we just go with them?"
"Because my father wouldn't let us, remember?"
"Oh yeah."
Elrond had been rather explicit about the two of them not getting into trouble. He had forbidden them to go on the hunting trip, claiming that his store of herbs was getting low. He said that he was not going to patch up the two of them again. After all, they had only just been patched up two and a half weeks ago from an orc encounter. Legolas grimaced at the thought of what Elrond might've said if he saw what Aragorn was trying to convince him to do now.
"Why aren't the twins with us, again?"
"Because they wanted to go hunting, and didn't care if their friend and little brother were stuck by themselves."
"So nice of them." Legolas found himself once again staring down at the ground. "I want the truth now, Estel. If they were here, what would they be doing right now?"
The young man looked thoughtful, and the he shrugged, with a sly smile on his face. "They would be swimming down in the lake. As for you, they probably would've pushed you over the side by this time."
Legolas grimaced, and then looked fearfully back at Aragorn. The human gave him an innocent glance, and motioned over the cliff. Aragorn wouldn't really push him in, would he? Legolas thought. It was bad enough to jump, but having someone push you over was completely undignified. And if someone pushed, well, there was a good chance that you would miss the lake completely.
"Legolas, all you have to do is jump. I know you can make it!" Aragorn said exasperated. "Just a little jump, and you land down in the lake and it's all over! You don't have to worry about it."
Legolas pursed his lips. Either he willingly tempted death by jumping or he unwillingly tempted it. Aragorn wasn't going to let him out of this one. Taking a deep breath and letting it slowly out, he whispered his last few words.
"If I don't make it, human, you are dead," Legolas threatened. Backing up a good distance, he carefully calculated his jump before sprinting forward. His feet left the edge of the cliff, and he felt the strange sensation of flying; and then the most unpleasant feeling of plummeting towards the ground.
It hurt when he hit the water, but not badly. The cold liquid surrounded him, covering his head as he sunk closer and closer to the bottom. Finally, when he reached the bottom, he used the ground and propelled himself back towards the surface. Fresh air met his starved lungs, and slowly he made his way to the edge of the small pond. It hadn't been so terrible after all. Aragorn had been right. He had easily made it to the lake.
He looked up at his human friend, who was still residing upon the cliff. He was looking down, making sure that Legolas had made it. Legolas' lips twitched at the relieved look on his face. So, his threats had gotten through after all....
The self-satisfaction didn't last very long. The cliff was strong enough to hold up the slight weight of an elf but not the heavy body of a man. A sharp crack filled Legolas' ears, and he watched with a slight bit of horror as Aragorn tumbled down the side of the hill. The man reached the bottom of the hill but instead of landing he disappeared. There was a slight thud, and then silence.
Legolas quickly pulled himself from the water, and rung out his hair. For some reason, he didn't feel as worried as he should've been. Jogging over to where the young man had disappeared, he found himself surprised. There was a fissure in the ground, about three feet wide, and around twelve feet in length. Somehow he had missed it when he had first scanned the ground. Peering into it, he found that he could see very little. It was rather dark.
"Estel?"
No response.
"Aragorn?"
No answer.
"STRIDER?"
Nothing. Legolas found his worry growing a bit. What if his friend had hit his head on the way down? It was a possibility. Anything was possible when it came to Aragorn.
While pondering this, the prince was unaware of how weak the ground was near him. He didn't see the threatening cracks growing around his feet, nor did he hear the sounds of rock giving away. No, the Prince of Mirkwood did not realize something was wrong until it was too late. The rock that he was standing on gave out and he was sent into the darkness.
He landed on something sharp, and pointy and soft at the same time. Small pricks all over his arms and legs; something was pulling at his clothing. He struggled vainly against it, feeling incredibly claustrophobic. Had to get back to the outside. The light of day seemed so far away.
"Don't try; it's no use." A voice sounded next to him. He turned towards it, trying to focus on the person. He could vaguely make out the shape of Aragorn.
"What do you mean?!" The elf asked in a panicked tone.
"I mean," the human replied casually. "That this is a thorn bush and that we are stuck until someone finds us."
It took a moment for the words to sink in.
"And how do you know this?" It was hissed dangerously.
"Because this has happened to me before. You know all those times I missed? Well, that's how I discovered the thorn bush. Its thorns don't come out without help. We could be here for a while."
"Remind me, does anyone know that we are here?"
"Nope."
"So we are stuck until someone decides to look for us?"
"Yep."
"I am going to kill you."
"Hey! That's not fair! You did make it!" Aragorn protested.
"So? It's your fault I'm down here!" Legolas snapped, struggling some more.
"And to think, I have yet to tell you the worst part of this!"
"It can get worse?"
"Oh yes, my dear prince. You see, there is a slight poison of sorts on these thorns. Not really a poison, just something that severely irritates one's skin. Sort of like ant bites. I'm immune to it because I've landed on this thing so many times, but you, nin mellon, you......" He broke off giggling.
Legolas leaned back, feeling his hair snagging more on the bushes. No, no, no, no. He should've left Aragorn to die the first time they had met! Then he would not be in this situation. But it was too late for that now. Revenge would have to be enough. There were so many evil things to do. He grinned to himself happily.
"You're being quiet. That scares me."
"It should, human. How long do you estimate till they find us?"
"At least a few hours if not more."
"Good."
"I don't like the sound of that."
"Good."
"What are you planning?"
"You'll see."
There was a long silence.
"Legolas?"
"Yes, human?"
"We'll laugh about this in future years. I know it. We will be sitting around the fire and one of us will remember this and we will laugh about it. I'm sure."
"Estel, last time I checked, humans didn't live to be a thousand. I regret to say that you won't be there to laugh with me."
"Legolas, I meant in the near future."
"Oh, but that is in the near future for me...."
Aragorn sighed and shifted on the bush. Well, at least he wouldn't die for a bit. A few more hours to live, before the prince and he were free; then Legolas' wrath would be upon him.
Before he drifted off to sleep, a familiar phrase flitted through his mind.
Damn the stupid thorn bush.
~*~
The End
~*~
I wrote this because I had planned to and because people demanded it ^__^. Also, do to popular demand I am writing a story called "Inside the Beast" which is a tale of Aragorn bringing Gollum to Mirkwood. Hopefully, I will start posting it soon, but time will be the only thing to tell! Review if you'd like! ^_^ Reviews make me happy!
By tHe InSaNe OnE
AN- Back again with a small bit of stupidity while I work on another fic. ^_^ You shall hear more about that later! Anyway, thank you SO much for all the great reviews on "Understanding". I never expected so many! ^_^ You guys are so good to me! I never can thank you all enough!
Dedicated to my reviewers from "Understanding"; more specifically: Emmithar, Elladan, Achika-chan, RainyDayz, Daylight, Sheleigh, Lady_Marmalada, Here Kitty, DSRockStar, Erin21, Rivendells_Mistress, Kawaii BlueBear, shauna, evil spapple pie, Rain Minstrel, Freakizimi, Kaeera, HobbitsRFun, Ciria, melodie, Nili, shirebound, mbali, Captain Thorongil, Sue, Eileen, HaloGatomon, Carrie-n-Emmithar (who happens to be just Carrie), and Celestra.
Also dedicated to Winky-wan Kenobi the Jedi-house elf, and Aralondwen for laughing at it and convincing me to post it!
~*~
"No."
"Oh, come on."
"No, I refuse."
"Legolas......don't be a wimp!"
"I am not being a wimp. I am being sane."
Legolas peered over the cliff skeptically. So it wasn't quite a skeptical glance. It was a look that stated quite firmly 'there is no way in hell, Estel'. The drop was probably a good twenty feet, if not more. He backed up a few feet and turned to his human friend, shaking his head. There wasn't anyway that the young man was going to pull him into this one. Uh-uh, no way. He would have to see a herd of oliphaunts first.
"Elladan, Elrohir and I do this all the time! We haven't ever been injured......" Estel paused for a second. "Badly."
"Estel, there is no way you could get me to do that!" Legolas exclaimed, waving a hand towards the end of the cliff. "I don't really care what you and your brothers do for 'fun'. I call that insanity, and I do not wish to take part in it!"
Estel pouted sullenly, "You put such a damper on things. It's not insanity! I've made it plenty of times!"
"How many times is 'plenty'?" Legolas questioned critically. Estel looked like a young child pouting the way he was. How could he actually be considered grown? He was twenty two and acting like he was a third of his age.
"At least thirty times!"
"And how many times have you tried?"
Aragorn's face fell slightly at the thought of that but the look soon vanished. "That doesn't matter! I'm a human! My brother's have only missed once or twice! Elladan missed twice because I grabbed onto him half-way down both times, and Elrohir missed because he slipped!"
"Why am I having a very hard time believing you?"
"I don't have any idea."
"Remind me, why aren't they with us on this little.....endeavor?"
"They went out with the scouting party. The two of them, Glorfindel, and two others; hunting, scouting, having fun; unlike us."
"Why didn't we just go with them?"
"Because my father wouldn't let us, remember?"
"Oh yeah."
Elrond had been rather explicit about the two of them not getting into trouble. He had forbidden them to go on the hunting trip, claiming that his store of herbs was getting low. He said that he was not going to patch up the two of them again. After all, they had only just been patched up two and a half weeks ago from an orc encounter. Legolas grimaced at the thought of what Elrond might've said if he saw what Aragorn was trying to convince him to do now.
"Why aren't the twins with us, again?"
"Because they wanted to go hunting, and didn't care if their friend and little brother were stuck by themselves."
"So nice of them." Legolas found himself once again staring down at the ground. "I want the truth now, Estel. If they were here, what would they be doing right now?"
The young man looked thoughtful, and the he shrugged, with a sly smile on his face. "They would be swimming down in the lake. As for you, they probably would've pushed you over the side by this time."
Legolas grimaced, and then looked fearfully back at Aragorn. The human gave him an innocent glance, and motioned over the cliff. Aragorn wouldn't really push him in, would he? Legolas thought. It was bad enough to jump, but having someone push you over was completely undignified. And if someone pushed, well, there was a good chance that you would miss the lake completely.
"Legolas, all you have to do is jump. I know you can make it!" Aragorn said exasperated. "Just a little jump, and you land down in the lake and it's all over! You don't have to worry about it."
Legolas pursed his lips. Either he willingly tempted death by jumping or he unwillingly tempted it. Aragorn wasn't going to let him out of this one. Taking a deep breath and letting it slowly out, he whispered his last few words.
"If I don't make it, human, you are dead," Legolas threatened. Backing up a good distance, he carefully calculated his jump before sprinting forward. His feet left the edge of the cliff, and he felt the strange sensation of flying; and then the most unpleasant feeling of plummeting towards the ground.
It hurt when he hit the water, but not badly. The cold liquid surrounded him, covering his head as he sunk closer and closer to the bottom. Finally, when he reached the bottom, he used the ground and propelled himself back towards the surface. Fresh air met his starved lungs, and slowly he made his way to the edge of the small pond. It hadn't been so terrible after all. Aragorn had been right. He had easily made it to the lake.
He looked up at his human friend, who was still residing upon the cliff. He was looking down, making sure that Legolas had made it. Legolas' lips twitched at the relieved look on his face. So, his threats had gotten through after all....
The self-satisfaction didn't last very long. The cliff was strong enough to hold up the slight weight of an elf but not the heavy body of a man. A sharp crack filled Legolas' ears, and he watched with a slight bit of horror as Aragorn tumbled down the side of the hill. The man reached the bottom of the hill but instead of landing he disappeared. There was a slight thud, and then silence.
Legolas quickly pulled himself from the water, and rung out his hair. For some reason, he didn't feel as worried as he should've been. Jogging over to where the young man had disappeared, he found himself surprised. There was a fissure in the ground, about three feet wide, and around twelve feet in length. Somehow he had missed it when he had first scanned the ground. Peering into it, he found that he could see very little. It was rather dark.
"Estel?"
No response.
"Aragorn?"
No answer.
"STRIDER?"
Nothing. Legolas found his worry growing a bit. What if his friend had hit his head on the way down? It was a possibility. Anything was possible when it came to Aragorn.
While pondering this, the prince was unaware of how weak the ground was near him. He didn't see the threatening cracks growing around his feet, nor did he hear the sounds of rock giving away. No, the Prince of Mirkwood did not realize something was wrong until it was too late. The rock that he was standing on gave out and he was sent into the darkness.
He landed on something sharp, and pointy and soft at the same time. Small pricks all over his arms and legs; something was pulling at his clothing. He struggled vainly against it, feeling incredibly claustrophobic. Had to get back to the outside. The light of day seemed so far away.
"Don't try; it's no use." A voice sounded next to him. He turned towards it, trying to focus on the person. He could vaguely make out the shape of Aragorn.
"What do you mean?!" The elf asked in a panicked tone.
"I mean," the human replied casually. "That this is a thorn bush and that we are stuck until someone finds us."
It took a moment for the words to sink in.
"And how do you know this?" It was hissed dangerously.
"Because this has happened to me before. You know all those times I missed? Well, that's how I discovered the thorn bush. Its thorns don't come out without help. We could be here for a while."
"Remind me, does anyone know that we are here?"
"Nope."
"So we are stuck until someone decides to look for us?"
"Yep."
"I am going to kill you."
"Hey! That's not fair! You did make it!" Aragorn protested.
"So? It's your fault I'm down here!" Legolas snapped, struggling some more.
"And to think, I have yet to tell you the worst part of this!"
"It can get worse?"
"Oh yes, my dear prince. You see, there is a slight poison of sorts on these thorns. Not really a poison, just something that severely irritates one's skin. Sort of like ant bites. I'm immune to it because I've landed on this thing so many times, but you, nin mellon, you......" He broke off giggling.
Legolas leaned back, feeling his hair snagging more on the bushes. No, no, no, no. He should've left Aragorn to die the first time they had met! Then he would not be in this situation. But it was too late for that now. Revenge would have to be enough. There were so many evil things to do. He grinned to himself happily.
"You're being quiet. That scares me."
"It should, human. How long do you estimate till they find us?"
"At least a few hours if not more."
"Good."
"I don't like the sound of that."
"Good."
"What are you planning?"
"You'll see."
There was a long silence.
"Legolas?"
"Yes, human?"
"We'll laugh about this in future years. I know it. We will be sitting around the fire and one of us will remember this and we will laugh about it. I'm sure."
"Estel, last time I checked, humans didn't live to be a thousand. I regret to say that you won't be there to laugh with me."
"Legolas, I meant in the near future."
"Oh, but that is in the near future for me...."
Aragorn sighed and shifted on the bush. Well, at least he wouldn't die for a bit. A few more hours to live, before the prince and he were free; then Legolas' wrath would be upon him.
Before he drifted off to sleep, a familiar phrase flitted through his mind.
Damn the stupid thorn bush.
~*~
The End
~*~
I wrote this because I had planned to and because people demanded it ^__^. Also, do to popular demand I am writing a story called "Inside the Beast" which is a tale of Aragorn bringing Gollum to Mirkwood. Hopefully, I will start posting it soon, but time will be the only thing to tell! Review if you'd like! ^_^ Reviews make me happy!