Author's Note: No, this isn't an illusion. Hello, my lovelies!

Dedication: To LiaSango - who for some reason, has always believed in me.

Notes About This Story: If you're looking for a story that has plot twists, love triangles and explosions, you've come to the wrong place. If you're looking for a plot beyond "emotionally constipated male seeks female who puts up with way too much shit," then again, you're in the wrong place. If you are looking for fluff, swearing, nearly naked Naraku doing yoga, utter shenanigans, Kouga and Inuyasha sharing a deep bro-like bond that defies time and space, awkward people in awkward situations, a fraternity that isn't a fraternity at all, and a love that can't be tamed-

Then welcome. Pull up a chair, my friend.

Updates will be weekly, unless otherwise indicated.

Tell Me I'm Crazy

(I Can't Stop the Feeling)

Part I

"What the actual fuck."

If Inuyasha Taisho could die in a freak accident involving the great Mother Nature, this would be the moment for the universe to give consideration.

"Ah! I'm– I'm sorry! I thought–"

As far as first impressions go, this is a bad one.

"Just because I'm outside–"

"You've been here since last night!'

…Ah, well. That explains the distinct chill in his bones and the fact that he feels a little wet everywhere. He's heard that happens to people who sleep outside. He's never done it, not even to go camping, so he can't really say for sure. Apparently, he decided sleeping outdoors was for the best in his drunken stupor. Fantastic.

He tries to save face. "That means nothing, really, at this school–"

"You could have been hurt–"

"Stop yelling over me, you fucking crazy–"

"I thought you were dead!"

Back to first impressions, then. This? Is bad. Crazy bad. Psycho-ex-wife-has-your-dick-in-a-vise bad. Presumed dead, smelling of alcohol, found under a tree after sleeping outside all night and hung over as fuck? Bad. That shit's no bueno.

Inuyasha's face suddenly goes blank at the flustered, horrifyingly genuine look on the face of the woman before him. Like him, she has long black hair though her eyes are far darker. Her skin is smooth, unblemished and rather porcelain-like. She's not wearing anything but comfortable-looking clothes, but even from his position on the ground he can see that she has a great body. Tall hips, curvy, though she looks short even bent over him like she is – which, great, cleavage.

Basically, she's really fucking attractive and all he can claim for sure is that he's straddling the line between drunk and hung over at the base of a tree in which she thought he had perished under.

"Well," he mutters finally, awkward considering the long pause of their confused staring. "As you can see, I'm alive."

The black-haired woman nods once, final, then continues to stare.

"Uh…"

"I'm Kagome," she says, in such a fumbling rush that she actually blushes a little. "Sorry I thought you were– Well, you know."

"I'm not," he repeats, rather unnecessarily. It's a little depressing.

Kagome laughs – the kind of laugh that awkwardness makes choppy but is disgustingly genuine – before straightening herself and brushing at her jeans. "Great then."

"Great," he mimics.

Kagome stares at him for a little longer, her blush rising once more before she does an odd, galloping side-step away.

His brain finally decides to start processing properly, which doesn't explain the way he blurts out his name to her retreating back. "I'm Inuyasha."

Kagome freezes but when she turns around there's a small smile playing at her lips. "Nice to know you're alive."

He scowls, running a hand through his dark hair. "You need to let that go."

"You were sleeping under a tree. You hadn't moved in at least eight hours." Kagome's no longer blushing but her eyebrow is raised. Suddenly, the bashful and awkward woman is gone; saying his name must have levelled the playing field. He mostly regrets it now.

"It's peaceful," he snaps, unreasonably. He knows it but given the annoying circumstances that got him into this situation there's no other way his brain is allowing him to act. The annoying circumstances, of course, being that Miroku is an asshole who allowed him to sleep under a tree.

Kagome must see this – or at least partly gets it – because she throws her hands up in surrender. "I'm just about to get some coffee. Want some?"

The idea sounds wonderful. His body nearly cries tears of joy at the suggestion. He scowls again. "I'm fine."

"Clearly." The tiny smile never leaves. "Well, that was the offer." Again, she turns around to leave.

And just like last time, his brain once again gets its stupid act together. His best friend, Miroku, always tells him how rude he is on the best of days. Technically, she didn't do anything wrong. She was checking to make sure he was still breathing. Given that he had been drunkenly sleeping somewhat dejectedly under a tree in the middle of campus – for over eight hours he had now learned – it was reasonable to guess he may be indisposed of. Should he have been less rude? Maybe. Is he a bit of a dick? That, at least, is relatively well-known. Technically, another person with that knowledge is more power to the people.

His hangover isn't bad considering the long sleep, but still he gets up and looks into the distance. Kagome is already out of his line of sight so it should be safe. Hopefully by the time he gets to campus – and to the only decent coffee place – she would be long gone.

She isn't long gone. Motherfucker.

In actuality, this Kagome woman is the slowest walker in the world because the moment he steps in the coffee place, two things are immediately apparent: one, the lineup for ordering literally stretches right to the door; and two, Kagome is the last person in line directly in front of him. Instinct has him stepping backwards to leave – not flee – but those dark eyes are already staring at him. The infuriating eyebrow is raised in position. "It's not what it looks like," he says, stupidly. He must have drank more than he thought since even though he doesn't feel like his brain was hit with a baseball bat, it clearly was.

Kagome shrugs and turns back around. "Okay, Inuyasha."

His name sounds ridiculous coming from her lips. Inuyasha strangely wants to hear it again. "Mere coincidence," he continues, quietly. "All I want is a large dark roast so I can caffeinate this nightmare away." He really needs to stop opening his mouth. Honestly. Luckily for him, there's no response.

Eventually they make it to the counter. There are two cashiers taking orders but while Kagome's is being fulfilled, there's a jackass ordering for what seems like his entire class. Kagome leaves with a coffee in hand and goes to the counter to wait for her food. Inuyasha reminds himself to not be creepy and goes to place his order.

"Large dark, one cream," he sighs, studiously ignoring the black-haired woman to his right.

The cashier smiles politely and gets the drink prepared, handing it over without flourish. "Your coffee was already paid for, so you can have a nice day."

Inuyasha stands there, coffee in hand but still resting on the countertop. He sighs again. "You're fucking with me."

Looking taken aback, the cashier slowly recovers enough to shake his head. "I really hope not."

Inuyasha sighs and turns. Kagome is no longer waiting but instead he finds her sitting at a table in the corner. He's walking over there before he makes the conscious decision to do so.

Kagome, for all her flustered blushing act earlier, doesn't even look up at him now. She's just eating some egg croissant thing that makes his sad stomach growl. Irrationally, his mouth wants to do the same. "I hate you," he announces, sitting across from her and glowering.

For a moment, the brown-eyed woman looks offended and Inuyasha thinks to himself, finally. Then it's gone and replaced by amusement, which– no. "Who are you?" he asks bluntly. "The Devil? Did my brother put you up to this?"

Kagome shrugs. "I don't think I'm the Devil, but I would assume I wouldn't tell a pion like you unless you were about to sell your soul to me. Did you want to sell your soul?"

Inuyasha just stares, horrified.

She continues on like a freight train. "So no. Also, no – to the brother thing."

"Did you use the word 'pion' in an actual sentence?"

Finally, the small smile returns to her face. It doesn't make Inuyasha feel any better but he sits lower in his seat, settles. "Typically, that is where words go."

He takes a sip of his coffee, still too hot but he enjoys it anyway for the future relief it will bring. He waits, wondering if the woman before him will speak. It seems doubtful with the breakfast sandwich in her hands, currently being devoured. "Are you in a hurry?" Inuyasha blinks and wonders why the hell he would ask that. Why would he even care?

Kagome nods, still chewing. She takes a sip of her own drink before answering. "I've got class soon."

Which means in half an hour, given how the schedules are. Inuyasha tilts his head. "Freshman?"

"Nope," she replies, over exaggerating the 'p'. "Second year. What about you?"

"Third."

Kagome makes a face but covers it with another sip. "What made you sleep under a tree last night?"

"Alcohol," Inuyasha replies, shrugging. "There's this guy I know, who claims to be my best friend but he's apparently an asshole and allowed whatever the fuck happened last night."

"Do you think maybe he didn't expect such a high level of whatever-the-fuck to happen?" Kagome asks, not even fazed by his words. "It is a Wednesday morning."

Which means that he got absolutely shit-faced on a random Tuesday night, a solid month into the school year. It was Kouga's birthday yesterday though so the power of Corner House compelled them. There were over forty people in their place last night, boozing away. Living in Corner House, known for the last three decades as the 'Frat House That Didn't Belong to a Fraternity' means there are a lot of parties. Inuyasha is fond of his roommates, even goddamn Naraku who he wants to stab to death most days, and getting into that house last year was his biggest accomplishment to date.

He doesn't say that out loud though.

"There was a thing," he says, grimacing and taking another sip of coffee. Jesus fucking Christ it needs to wake him up faster.

"Uh-huh."

"Birthday," he further explains, which, why the fuck is he even trying? He doesn't know this girl. He doesn't owe her shit. She can be as judgmental as she wants, with her stupid raised eyebrow and permanent amusement. Inuyasha is a strong, independent man who doesn't need no–

He takes another sip of his coffee and prays for death.

"What's your major?" Kagome asks, out of the blue. She's looking at her sandwich rather than his face though, so maybe she feels as awkward as he does.

"Poli-sci." Political science has too many syllables at the moment. "You?"

"Communications."

Inuyasha smirks. "Do you communicate well?"

Kagome simply stares at him, looking almost disappointed. "While this has been fun, I have to go to class. You know, to learn how to communicate."

"Good idea."

"Try not to sleep under any more trees."

Inuyasha scowls, glaring at her. "You're going to have to let that shit go."

"You were drunk on a Tuesday night."

"There was a birthday!" he tries.

And fails, since Kagome just shakes her head at him, the corner of her mouth slightly twitching upwards. "Whatever you have to tell yourself."

Seriously, this woman is pissing him off. She's not even saying anything cruel or cutting – frankly, kindergarteners are meaner – but something about her tone of voice irritates the ever-loving fuck out of him. He wants to strangle her or kiss her or–

Huh.

Well then.

"Maybe you should come to a class of mine," Kagome says, too casually, "considering from the look on your face you've been trying to yell at me for the past minute and a half and can't get past the part where you open your mouth."

"You–"

"Feel better, Inuyasha," Kagome says cheerfully, waving as she walks away.

And, like any victim of a female tornado who invades into a man's life like a fucking tsunami and leaves a trail of destruction–

Inuyasha sighs explosively, lowers his head onto the table, and prays for more coffee. With metaphors as awful and mixed as that, he may as well just wait for death.

Miroku is the worst best friend in the history of ever.

"Oh good," his not-friend says, setting the timer on the microwave after glancing his way. "You're alive."

"No thanks to you," Inuyasha snaps. He had caved and bought another large coffee. So far, he isn't finding any noticeable relief. It's like the universe is trying to tell him something. Or his liver is.

"I tried, man," Miroku sighs. He blinks at him with those stupid baby-blue orbs and pouts, like a goddamn child. "I practically begged you to stay but no, you wanted to go out and have an adventure."

"Adventure," Inuyasha repeats, slowly. He has to be sure.

"Yeah, an adventure, you jackass. You and your best friend–"

"Don't say it."

Miroku grins. "Your best friend, Kouga."

He had been proud of the fact he wasn't at all nauseous this morning. The feeling practically overwhelms him now. "Ugh."

Miroku starts giggling like the twelve year-old girl he is, ignoring the glare Inuyasha sends his way. "The two of you are the fucking best. You can barely be in the same room sober but get some beer in you and the two of you are star-crossed lovers or some shit."

"I'm leaving now. You're the worst."

"Running into Kouga's arms, are you?" Miroku chirps at him while he walks away. "Why don't you both go for a romantic daytime stroll–"

"Go fuck yourself," Inuyasha yells, flipping him off without even looking back. He almost makes it out of the kitchen too but is quickly deterred by the last person he ever wanted to see. "Just waking up, asshole?"

Kouga grunts at him, shouldering by with his stupid muscles. Inuyasha hates him with a fiery passion. Something about him just rubs him the wrong way, by which he means irritates him because there sure as fuck isn't any actual rubbing going on between them.

"Morning, princess," Miroku coos, cackling with glee when Kouga groans at the sound of the microwave beeping. "There's Advil in the cupboard."

"What time is it?" he asks, scratching at his head and making his stupid long, stupid brown hair even worse. What with his stupid muscles and his stupid smile that all the girls fucking love as he plays the stupidest game in the goddamn world–

"A bit after eleven," Miroku answers, distracting him.

"Damn." Kouga sighs, as if the world has wronged him. "I actually like that class."

"You mean you like some chick in there you're trying to bang." Miroku wags a finger at him. "You're not subtle."

"More like a fucking elephant," Inuyasha mutters, a little disappointed that his nemesis-by-day didn't hear him over the sound of cupboards opening and closing.

Finally with the prized ibuprofen in hand, Kouga grins. "Your words, not mine. Now, please tell me you have fucking coffee somewhere."

Inuyasha counts to three and then turns on his heel to leave. His best friend is a traitor and Kouga is the ugliest fuck to have ever lived. They are not star-crossed lovers via beer goggles, no matter what his so-called best friend says.

He hates everyone, basically. What a time to be alive.

In all honesty, he kind of forgets about Kagome.

Well, that's a lie. He remembers her but mostly her boobs and usually only before bed or in the shower when he needs fantasy material. He's not exactly proud to admit it but frankly the chances of ever seeing the second-year student again are slim to none. The university campus is huge. There are thousands of students that go there.

There isn't a snowball's chance in hell, so Inuyasha doesn't feel guilty and basically continues on with his life the same as usual.

He jerks off in the shower, thinking about her curves. It's fine, really. No harm, no foul. It's just a visual thing because he doesn't know her and he'll never, ever, ever see her again.

Ever.

Ever.

His life is a fucking joke. He should have known better.

Inuyasha runs into her while he's leaving class, almost two weeks later.

Literally runs into her. She collapses and smashes her head against the ground, her hands clutching her laptop and unable to break her fall because the universe actually hates him and wants to watch him suffer. He must have killed puppies in his past life.

"Ow," Kagome says, staring at the ceiling with a kind of weird fascination he previously associated with serial killers on those procedural cop shows, contemplating their next move.

"Shit," Inuyasha mutters, bending down. The hallway isn't extremely busy but there's a couple guys hovering nearby, probably making sure he didn't purposely try to murder her. He's not stupid; he recognizes Kagome right away. Her boobs are covered up but those really dark eyes get to him immediately, especially when they focus on him.

"Oh, it's you," she says. She sounds almost betrayed.

Puppies and kittens; he apparently killed them both.

"Here, let me–" He bends down slightly and then aborts, because no. Should he help her? His hands flail a little, stop, and now he just looks fucking weird. "Uh–"

Kagome sits up, one hand bracing while the other continues to hold her device. "You're like a brick wall. And normally that would be a compliment but my head hurts too much to say for sure."

Eh. He'll take it either way. "How's your head?" He reaches down when she waves at him to. Thank god she's not as awkward as him in social situations. She wants something; she asks. He can appreciate that in a woman.

"Not amazing but I'll live. Where were you escaping from so fast?"

Inuyasha shrugs. "Just class. I'm done for the day."

"Are you going home?" Kagome reaches back to touch her head, wincing ever-so-slightly.

It makes him feel guilty as shit. He honestly wasn't looking when he was rushing out of there but normal people tend to get out of the way. He's not exactly small. "Yeah, I was planning on it." He pauses, Miroku's voice screaming in his ear to not be such a dickbag. "Uh, what about you?" Desperately, he bites his cheek to stop from wincing. He sounds awkward as fuck, the question the most stilted thing ever.

If the black-haired woman notices his internal struggle, she doesn't say anything. "I have a four hour break so I'm going back to my place for dinner." Kagome gives him a small smile, raising that infuriating brow. "Where do you live?"

Maybe he just sucks at conversation, but that was not a question he was expecting. "Bowman and Marsh," Inuyasha recites. "Not far."

"Great, I'm just a little past there. I was going to my locker to drop off some books. Want to come with and then we can walk back together? So you can make sure I don't collapse due to a head injury."

Uh, what?

"Sure."

Fuck. It's out of his mouth before he even thinks about it. It was automatic, unstoppable. Something about her pointed eyebrow and the way she looks at him, like he's the most amusing thing she's seen all week, makes words just tumble out like vomit. It's disgusting. Inuyasha used to scare people off better than this.

"Cool. What class did you come from?" Kagome's already walking away, a couple steps ahead before he gets with the program. He's not too sad about it though; it was a chance to check out her ass and it's a nice one. How did he not notice before?

Right. Hung over as fuck after sleeping under a tree… That would do it.

Inuyasha scowls. "The History of Political Thought. I want to stab myself every time I go."

Laughing, Kagome turns down another hallway and stops abruptly at a poorly painted, hideously green locker. "Sounds pretentious," she says, unlocking it. Kagome grabs a couple textbooks from her incredibly stuffed laptop bag and exchanges them with a few others. Her laptop is properly put away now that there's not so much in it. "What class do you have that you actually enjoy?"

He frowns. "You can enjoy them?" Kagome's laughing again like he's a damn comedian, little chuckles that make her face brighter. Honest-to-god, he asked that question seriously but apparently she thinks it's a joke.

"Kagome!" They both turn to look down the hallway where a group of students are approaching. Two of them wave, a guy and a girl, smiling like seeing Kagome's the best part of their day.

"Are you coming tonight?" the girl asks, sounding excited. Personally, Inuyasha thinks she's on something to be so freaking bubbly.

"Yeah, of course. Both of you should be there too, it'll be worth it." And she winks at them. Kagome winks, all flirty and smiling and Inuyasha can't take his eyes off her. What the hell.

The other two aren't faring much better. Their group has already left them but they don't seem to care at all. The guy looks like he's seen fucking heaven.

"It was good seeing you," Kagome says, shutting her locker. "I'll find you later!"

Inuyasha blinks as the black-haired woman walks away, watching her retreating figure for a moment before quickly following. Kagome is weird. She's bashful and then has that calm-cool-and-collected thing going on about her. And then, out of the blue, she's this smiling beacon of fucking sunshine which is funny, because when he met her the first time he could only compare her to natural disasters like tornados and shit.

He wants to ask her what they were talking about but before he can even open his mouth, Kagome nudges him. "First year students are so young, don't you think?"

Uh, he can't honestly say he's thought about it. He tries his best to not think about or talk to anyone at all. The first years' shouldn't be disheartened by it. "No?" He winces. That definitely sounded like a question when it should very much not have been.

"Really?" She looks at him with those dark brown eyes, like she's taking his words to heart. "I don't know. I believe there's a huge difference between first year and second year students. For most people it's the first chance to be on their own. Frosh week is the best, mainly because newcomers are torn between being absolutely terrified or feeling absolutely alive."

Um. Who says shit like that?

"You going to Homecoming?" she asks then, suddenly.

Right. That's this weekend. Inuyasha had completely forgotten. "Maybe? We try to make it to the game." What he doesn't say is that usually the guys of Corner House are far too smashed to walk the couple of blocks necessary to reach campus for the game. Himself included.

"You should go. If you need help getting tickets just let me know."

"What," Inuyasha says drily, "you happen to know a guy for last minute tickets?"

"Girl, actually," she replies, grinning at him. "She works in the Athletics Department."

They're just about to leave campus, the sidewalks turning from perfectly done to crumbling and uneven. Inuyasha catches movement from the corner of his eye and sees a girl waving at him cheerfully. She doesn't look remotely familiar but he's had really awkward encounters before. Apparently he was so drunk last Tuesday he slept under a tree. God only knows who he hit on that night.

Fuck, and Kagome's with him. It doesn't matter but he's an asshole on his good days. If this chick expects something from him he's going to have to act like he knows her, at least until he can corner Miroku or Kouga for an explanation. Why did he drink for Kouga's birthday again? He doesn't even like him–

"Hi Koume!" Kagome calls out, waving back.

The girl smiles wide, does some sort of hand sign that Kagome mimics, and then continues on her merry way.

Oh.

"You seem to know a lot of people," Inuyasha comments, watching the girl saunter off.

Kagome scoffs. "Not really. I know her from the Maroons. She's sweet."

The Maroons were the university's spirit group. They came to all the events – big or small – and got the crowd going and cheering. They were loud, annoying and some mornings when Inuyasha was hung over as all hell he wanted to ducktape their mouths shut.

When he was still drunk though, they were pretty fantastic for elevating school spirit and all that crap.

He doesn't have anything else to say, mainly because this conversation is probably the longest one he's had with someone he wouldn't consider a friend. They weren't friends – not at all. She found him under a tree two weeks ago and Inuyasha just so happened to run into her. Literally.

Kagome is nice, though. She's friendly and shit; the type of person Miroku always wants him to be. If he's drunk enough, he can usually manage it without getting hives. Otherwise, it's not even worth the attempt. The fact that he was a dick to her in the beginning and he nearly cracked her head open speaks volumes about the type of person she is.

She's obviously fucking crazy, but on the down low so people don't get scared off.

He's so lost in his thoughts that seeing Corner House startles him. Inuyasha turns around and yes, they did just walk in silence most of the way here. Kagome's looking straight ahead, calm.

"I'm just right there," Inuyasha says, pointing.

The black-haired woman raises a brow, noting what he's gesturing to. "You live in the Corner House?" There's a weight to her words, amusement heavy in her tone.

Shrugging, he nods. "It's fun."

"It's a frat house," Kagome says, not unkindly.

"Not…really." It's not, technically. "It's just seven guys living in a house that has a lot of alcohol in it."

"Is it true the bedrooms are only on the top floor and the basement, because the main level is where the parties occur?"

He mouths to himself 'where the parties occur' because who the fuck talks like that?

After a moment she chuckles, low and quiet. "Well?" Kagome presses.

Inuyasha sighs. "Yes. Happy?"

"I'm not unhappy," she says. "Anyways, I'll see you around. Let me know if you need those tickets!"

Inuyasha is confused for a moment before he realizes he's practically at his damn door. Kagome is already a few feet away, continuing on the uneven sidewalk towards her own place.

Kagome says 'see you around' like she knows it's going to happen. Frankly, he's not sure how.

The tickets, maybe?

But then again, he doesn't have her number. So how the fuck is he supposed to ask her for them?

He watches her, uncontrollably pleased that she doesn't turn around to catch him at it. She has a great ass, truly. That wasn't in his fantasy material but now… Now there's no limit. They've even had a conversation, regardless of the fact that she found him under a tree drunk and he nearly killed her via head wound.

There was only one way to put it.

Crazy. She must be straight-up crazy.

Next Time on Tell Me I'm Crazy: Those blue eyes are on him, judging mercilessly. "I know this look. It's the 'I'm as Emotionally Stunted as a Rock' look. It doesn't often appear on your face because you tend to ignore all things feelings. And yet."

Again, there will be an update every week. Thanks in advance for putting up with the shenanigans you're likely to experience now that I've returned.

As always, feedback is love.