Searching for a New Heart

By: Sissi

Disclaimer: MKR is not mine

Chapter Nine

            Time stopped at that moment. I stood there, grinning devilishly at her, flashing my white teeth at her horror-stricken face as her hands clenched tightly the blanket underneath us, so tightly that her knuckles were turning white. No sound reached the bedroom, and I felt like this was it, this was the end of the world, and the devil would rise from Hell and condemn human beings for all their bad deeds since they were created; all the pollution we have spread on the planet, all the degraded soils, the extinction of many rare animals, and the destruction of many ecosystems. As if it weren't enough to frighten us, long, red and hot flames would erupt from the soil and soak the blue sky with hues of red. The colour of blood and of love. We would run in all directions, trying to save our meaningless lives, screaming because the fear and despair would be too great to hold these emotions inside ourselves, when there would be no escape, we would all die for all the bad things we have done, for they were sins we would never be able to erase. They would forever be imprinted in the planet's history, and...

            ... And I am being too melodramatic. Sorry. Let's return to the story.

            But, as soon as time froze, it returned to normal, and I could hear the traffic jam outside my home, laughter coming from the living-room, probably from Hikaru and my sister, because Zagato doesn't usually laugh that loud, and music pouring from my neighbor's stereo system. Umi tried to distance herself from me, but I noticed her movement from the corner of my eye, and I quickly approached her, moving my body until it was touching hers again. Oh no, my dear, you are not going to escape from me, you will suffer, either from pain or pleasure, I don't know. Oh my goodness, I think I'm a maniac, what am I going to do? 

            Nothing, I guess. 

            She was the one who told me she wanted to know what I felt around her, so don't think I was being mean when I grasped her shoulders tightly and placed my lips near her ear, blowing at her earlobes once in a while as I breathed deeply, preparing myself for the big revelation. Umi stiffened at the contact, her hands still grasping my shoulders, trying to prevent me from being too intimate.

            Which, of course, was a futile attempt. Women... they think they can stop a man whenever they can, when in reality, we, men are the ones who have the control in most situation. I shook my head mentally and kept smirking at my victim. I licked my lips one last time and opened my mouth, letting the tip of my tongue tease the skin of her ear. She shivered, and I could feel her heat radiating the room.

            "YOU MAKE ME MAD!!" I screamed into her ear and she yelped in pain, pushing me hard on the chest until I fell on my back, my body being tossed off the bed and hitting the ground hard, my butt killing me as the impact of my fall finally reached my brain. I massaged my bruised skin, yet could not stop smirking as I watched a furious Umi with one hand holding her injured ear while the other one got hold of a book, which was on the a nightstand, and lifted it threateningly in my direction. I could clearly see the title of the book, and I could not help myself smiling at the irony of the situation, for the book was War and Peace.

            I inhaled deeply and grinned, and this triggered the war which ensued seconds later. I would say milliseconds, but I wasn't counting at the time, so I'm not sure. Let's say the entire ordeal happened so fast a person wouldn't even have time to blink. Yes, I think this is the best description of time for the situation. Now, let's move on with the story, right at where I stopped.

            The book was thrown right into my face, and I dodged it in time, moving my head to the right. I stopped massaging my hip and stood up. Umi kept glaring at me, her blue eyes sending me a clear message of a future painful death. I shrugged, lifting my right hand and forming a 'V' with my index and middle fingers. My trademark sign of victory, not that anyone cares. 

            "Yahhh!!" Umi yelled, grabbing a pillow and running in my direction. She ran as fast as she could, and due to my shock – I haven't ever seen a girl lose her composure before – I stood there, paralyzed right on my spot, not being able to move. The impact came soon after, with an enraged Umi using the pillow as a sword and plunging it into my stomach. I felt the air in my lungs leave me and I fell on my back, once again. Umi fell on top of me, heaving heavily, and started punching me. I grasped her wrists and with the other hand, pulled her off me. I moved my body until I was on top of her and settled my eyes on her. Her forehead was damp with sweat and her eyes had tinges of red. It was a very scary picture and I gulped, even though the fight was making me feel lightheaded. Wow, I had never though such a fight could make my body produce so much adrenaline!

            "Who's winning now?" I asked her, teasing her. I could not help, this girl had almost beaten me to a pulp and this was my chance to retaliate. Yeah, who's the boss here, baby? I would do my dance of victory, but I don't think this is the right moment.

            Anyway, my question, instead of shocking her and maybe paralyzing her, giving me time to attack, only did the contrary, much to my dismay; it fueled her to the point she used her bent legs and placed them on my stomach, and using her entire strength, she straightened them and made me fly towards the other side of the room. She stood up, placing a few loose tresses behind her ear, grabbed the pillow once again and was so concentrated on attacking me that she didn't notice that I had also taken hold of two pillows and had placed one in front of my stomach, as a shield, while the other one was much in the same gesture as Umi's, lifted in the air, ready to strike the enemy like a sword.

            Umi's pillow hit my shield and I had to plant me feet firmly on the ground so I wouldn't move too much from my original spot. I took this as my opportunity and hit the top of her head with the pillow, and she fell to her knees as I forced my hand to push her down. I was ready to give a step back and maybe start another attack for I do not strike fallen enemies when she saw my movement and stretched out her leg, and doing an arc with it, her shin hit my ankle and I fell on my butt. Again. I yelped in pain and rapidly placed a pillow under me. I started analyzing my fallen enemy, who was still on her knees, panting and eyeing her surroundings, looking for more weapons with which she could harm me. I narrowed my eyes, and when the pain subsided, I grabbed the pillow underneath me and walked to her. Well, I stalked over to where she was, to be more precise. She clenched her fists and straightened her jaw. Her narrowed eyes, much like my own, were analyzing each other's movements. She was a formidable fighter, I had to admit, but I would never allow myself to lose. Not to her, not to anyone else.

            I approached her until we were separated by only fifteen centimeters. She moved her legs much in the same way as before, trying to hit my ankle and make me fall again, but I learned my lesson. Especially when it is a past mistake, and this time, I jumped in the air. Umi widened her eyes and stood immobile as she watched my body fly in the air, stay there for a few seconds – which, to me, were amazing seconds for I felt like there was no gravity at all – and then my feet touch the ground graciously. Yes, note the adverb, I did touch the ground much in the same manner a swan swims in a lake. Swans are elegant animals, aren't they? Because this was probably one of the reasons the play Swan Lake was created.  Anyway, when I was on the ground again, I placed my hands on her shoulders, throwing the pillow away, and forced her down until her back touched the ground with a thump. She frowned, trying to pretend she had felt nothing, though I knew she had felt, even if slightly, the feeling of defeat. Okay, not defeat, I was merely joking. She probably felt pain. Are you happy now? See? I am an honest fellow; I should even receive a medal for this fact. Oh yeah, I really should.

            Before I could utter a word, she had already recovered her senses and took hold of my thrown pillow. Using it, she threw it in my face, making me distracted for a while. Using this moment, she pulled me off of her and started hitting me with the pillow she had thrown at me. When she grabbed it, I don't know. Probably when I saw little yellow stars floating right in front of my eyes and around my head. The strange fact was that I hadn't spotted the moon, but I think it was a moonless night. As the blows continued, white feathers started to drop to the ground. This girl was destroying my pillow!

            "No!" I yelled, and when she was going to hit me again, I bent my knees and she missed her target. I placed my hands on her waist and lifted her thin body up. I started to whirl her and me around like crazy, with the eyes wide open, not wanting to lose the sight of a sick Umi, who indeed, looked a bit green. She clenched her teeth and kept her pose of seriousness, but as I kept whirling around, I could feel her hands weaken and her face cringe as she couldn't take it anymore.

            I ran with a sick Umi to the nearest bathroom and left her there, closing the door behind me. I heard her gasp, pant, sound of something falling into the water and then... Noises of an angry Umi shouting at herself and blaming me for the situation. Ah, this is the song of victory, and while no one could see me, I did my victory dance, with the trademark 'V' sign and all, to my ghost public. I am too good, aren't I?

            The door opened and I set my features to a scowl. If she wanted to keep fighting, it was okay for me. I would fight till the end. I am a fighter. But, if she wanted truce...

            "I give up." She mumbled, sweat trailing down her face. She cringed when she licked her lips. I would have frowned, but I couldn't help smirking.

            I grinned and patted her shoulder. "I knew you would make the right decision."         

            "Keep dreaming, you fool," she muttered under her breath, "I'm only doing this because I'm tired". I shook my head good-naturedly. She was quite nice, but I still like Fuu better. Umi's got such a temper. I can't believe she is friends with such a sweet girl like Fuu. Oh well... if people say that the opposites attract for lovers, why not for friends?

            I led her to the kitchen where we both filled glasses with water and drank the precious liquid with one single gulp. I wiped my mouth with my sleeve, making Umi eye me reproachfully. I shrugged, making her ire return. Oh Gods, I can't believe I've done what I did. Bad, bad move, couldn't have done worse. Am I the most stupid person in the world or what?

            "Oh, there you are, I've been looking for you for some time now. Where have you guys been?" Hikaru asked us, poking her head inside the kitchen, smiling as she saw a piece of cake on the kitchen table. I nodded my head and she grinned, settling herself on a chair and eating a piece of it.

            "We've been... doing exercise, right?" I answered/asked, directing my somewhat lie to Umi. She stared intently at the floor, then at the tiles of the kitchen and finally sighed, nodding her head.

            "Cool. I'm going to the living-room now. Emeraude was showing me some photos. You were really cute when small, Ferio," Hikaru commented casually. I gasped, staring at her, baffled. Umi started to laugh, placing a hand over her lips. I turned my attention to the blue-haired girl, glaring daggers at her. She lifted her left hand, which was free, and made the victory sign, MY trademark sign. What the Hell...?!

            "Well, see you later, guys," Hikaru said, running to the other room. Umi shook her head, still smiling. Then, she calmed down, inhaled deeply and motioned for me to sit across from her, on the other side of the table. I did as she asked, not because I wanted to obey her, but because we had a serious issue between us, and it was better we sorted it out as soon as possible.

            Umi cleared her throat, and then, she narrowed her eyes. "You may have won this battle, but not this war."

            I snorted. I mean, come on, I can't believe what this girl is saying! She thinks she's still got a chance against me?  Besides, what does she have to intrude her friend's love life for? It's not like it is her business, right? I crossed my arms and told her it was none of her business. Go Ferio! Should I dance once again?

            "Actually, it is. She's one of my best friends, and she doesn't need you in her life."

            "Oh, excuse me, but how do you know? You're not Fuu, are you? Perhaps I'm talking to her twin or something, or maybe the Fuu I know is not Fuu, but Umi, or..." I replied. This truly pissed her off, and she forcefully placed the palms of her hands on the table, standing up and leaning her body over me. I didn't change my expression and eyed her coolly.

            "Stop joking! This is serious!"

            This was my time to get angry and I did the same thing as Umi. I placed my hands on the table, stood up, and now we were staring at each other's eyes. We weren't blinking at all; it might even be considered a contest. Who blinks first loses the game.

            "So am I! You can't say what your friend wants or doesn't want, 'cause you're NOT her! Got it or are you plain stupid?"

            "You jerk! You've just met her and you think you've got the right to think her world revolves around you? Well, you're wrong. She doesn't love or like you, she's being merely friendly towards you. Eagle is her BOYFRIEND, not you, got it? Besides, you're only playing with her, so quit it now, did you hear me?"

            I hissed, very angry now. I'm one of those guys who believes one should never hurt a girl – hey, I hit her with a pillow which technically doesn't hurt, only surprises you -  but I was so near to forgetting this that I had to avert my eyes so I would not see her and punch her. The nerve of this girl! I clenched my teeth, barely suppressing all my anger and ire.

            "What? I've discovered your real reasons, right?"

            This was it. I couldn't take it anymore, she was saying I'm one of those playboys who makes out with girls and then never calls back. Well, I'm not one of them and never will be.

            I slapped her.

            "You think you know me?" I asked her trembling frame. Good, she knows who's in the control here, "Well, you don't, 'cause I'm not one of those guys. I DO like Fuu. I'm not sure if it can be called love, but I like her, I enjoy her company, I find her one of the most beautiful, caring and courageous people I've ever met, and if you keep saying this shit, I'll forget you're a girl and truly hit you." I finished my sentence, my entire body trembling as my emotions were poured out, all my anger, ire, confusion, everything.

            "And if you keep telling me not to approach her, I won't obey you. Why would I? You don't have the authority; you're not her family or a relative. You're only a friend. I don't even think you should be called a friend of hers, choosing what's best for her without even considering her own opinion. What a poor excuse for a friend..." I snarled this last statement, sitting once again, and waiting for a response, which came, but not in the form I had expected.

            Umi started to cry. Her mouth opened and no sound came. Slowly, she slumped down on her seat, placed her face between her hands and let the sobs take control of her body. Cool, transparent liquid trailed down her cheeks, meeting the bottom of her chin and falling on the table, creating pools of crystalline water.

            I felt like shit. 

            Suddenly, as her cries started to increase in intensity, she raised her face and stared at me. Her eyes were red and puffy, and her cheeks were red as all the blood of her body was being sent to her face. Her left cheek was redder than normal with a hand imprint. I felt guilt swirl inside of me, poisoning my heart with regret. I truly felt bad, but now, it was done. She pointed a finger at my face, hic-cupped, and started to mumble and stammer. It was hard to understand what she said, the words were glued together, some others had lost syllables and other gained new ones.               

            "...I w-was the one w-who was there wi-with her when she f-fainted at school one day, du-during P.E... I w-was the one w-who was there w-when her parents t-told her a-about h-her heart problem!!"

            I sighed. This was not what I had expected from this confrontation. I had thought we would talk like grown people, yet instead, this is a complete mess. A complete chaos.

            " Wait, calm down and then we'll talk and... heck, I don't even know what I am talking about!" I confessed, lifting my hands to the ceiling and surrendering to chaos, to despair, to whatever it was. I sighed, rubbing my forehead, trying to understand what was happening. It was all so damn confusing!

            We stayed in silence for long minutes. Her crying subsided, and slowly, we found ourselves in a somewhat friendly silence. Umi placed her hands on the table, rubbing them to comfort herself. I preferred observing the kitchen, noticing for the first time how the light filtered through the blue curtains placed in front of the windows, and the blue colour would reflect on the white tiles, creating an ethereal picture which looked alive when there was wind for it would shift the curtains and, consequently, make the blue colour move once in a while, in an hypnotizing movement, just like the waves of the ocean. The table between Umi and me was made of wood, and it allowed six people to dine at the same time. Usually, it was only me, Emeraude and my parents, but now, with only the two of us, it looked quite too big for so many people. I sighed, running a hand through my hair, blowing away the green bangs which were glued to my forehead – the sweat hadn't evaporated completely yet.

            Umi cleared her throat. It reminded me of what had happened previously, and instinctively, I braced myself for her next words. I was kind of afraid of what would come, I could get angry again, and I didn't know if I would have enough self-control to not hit her.

            "It all started... two years ago." Umi said, sighing and standing up so she could get more water. She walked to the refrigerator, took out a big jar and poured water in her empty glass. She swirled the liquid for some time, watching the waves created by her motions and gulped half of it. She licked her lips, watching the liquid instead of me, and then, she went back to her seat.

            "She was healthy, or apparently, looked healthy. During a P.E. class, the teacher asked us to play soccer. Fuu usually was the goalkeeper, but that day, our team decided that she should change her role, just to change a little from the routine. So, after fifteen minutes of game, she suddenly fell to the ground, clutching her shirt, exactly where her heart would be. The teacher called an ambulance and we all went to the hospital, trying to learn what the problem was. I was so scared that she would die..."

            Umi sniffed, and stopped, breathing deeply. I could see a single tear escape from her eye and trail down her cheek. She straightened her back, and gazed intently at me. She would continue her story.

            "Her parents told me and Hikaru, Fuu's best friends, that she was born with a problem in her heart. The arteries and veins were too fragile and were almost closed, meaning that there wasn't sufficient blood running through her body. Fuu needed a heart transplant then, but a heart transplant is already very hard, so imagine one for a baby. Her parents had no idea of what to do, so the chief surgeon, not knowing what else to do, inserted catheters which opened the veins and arteries, letting more quantity of blood to flow. As time passed, - one or two years - the tissue around these devices scarred, so her vessels haven't grown in proportion to her body, and now Fuu doesn't receive enough blood to do the easiest physical exercise. It was okay for light exercises, but that PE class was too much and has damaged the scars and that's why she needs this heart transplant."

            She sighed, and reclined her head.

            "What about me? What do I have to do with all of this?" I asked her, understanding Fuu's situation, but still not getting why I couldn't stay with her.

            "When she learned about this two years ago, she was devastated. She wouldn't be able to have a normal life. We were all sad, had no idea of what to do. She was placed in this hospital, with no hope at all, and then, she met this other patient, Eagle. His case was considered lost, and yet, he had never lost hope. As time passed, they became great friends, and one day, he was cured. It was a miracle. And Fuu clung to him as if he could help her with her heart problem, and as their friendship got even stronger, they started to feel things for each other. And that's how they started dating."

            "I see..."

            "So, please, I know Fuu's fond of you, and... I think it's all a phase. Eagle has always helped her, and she became happy again once they started dating, and I want him near her, because they were fit for each other. They are perfect, and they care very much for each other. He's her anchor to this life. Do you get the idea of how important he is to her? And she is so dear to him..."

            "I get the idea and..." I could not say it, I could not, even though I knew that this was the best thing to do. Now I understood why Umi wanted me out of Fuu's life. Eagle represented life and hope to Fuu, and this was, actually, all that mattered. I closed my eyes, trying to clear my mind. My heart beat as quickly as possible, and suddenly, I felt very cold. Cold and lonely. The sun which was shining in my sky was suddenly clouded by dark clouds, and everything turned dark. Perhaps this trip to Brazil would cheer me up.

            At this moment, I wish I were very selfish so I could not take heed of Umi's words and keep with my plan of, maybe, in the future, becoming Fuu's boyfriend, but I am not this type of person. I care about other people, and Fuu... she means a lot to me, even though we've only met for a week now. She somehow makes me feel better, as if I still have time to be a better man and I want to keep feeling like this. But, this is impossible, right?

            I would give her up, and this saddened me. Sometimes, I think I am the person with the worst luck in the world. Okay, it's not that bad, for I met a wonderful person, met Hikaru who's an awesome girl, and well, Umi was a nice girl because she truly cared for her friends. I could feel my chest hurt. Someone was clutching my heart so hard that I could barely breathe.

            I sound like a girl, revealing my feelings to the world, but I can't help it. The pain is too much, and the only way I know to make matters easier is by telling my situation to my friends, and anyone who has endured me long enough is a friend of mine. So, I thank you. Should I hug you as well? Nah, I would be called a gay by doing this, and we wouldn't want this, would we? Of course not!

            "Can I," please, tell me yes, I can, please, I told myself, clutching desperately to a thin thread which was wrapped around my and Fuu's finger, "at least, stay friends with her?"

            "I...I don't know if this is a good idea," Umi replied, not looking directly at my eyes. I nodded my head. Of course, why would she let us stay together, if only as friends? Yes, fate did hate me, I can only guess I have done something awfully terrible in my previous life, and now, I was paying for it. Perhaps, if I hadn't stolen that candy when I was seven...

 "But, I'll give it a shot. But, just friends, okay?"

            "Yes, only friends, I promise!" I spoke loudly and quickly, barely believing what I heard. I felt this huge urge to kiss her, but instead, I stood up, walked to her and hugged her until she started punching lightly on my chest, and with a strangled voice, pleaded with me to release her for she was breathless. And almost boneless as well. I was going to release her when a golden head poked inside the kitchen door and pink lips formed a knowingly 'O'.  

            "It's not what you think!" Both Umi and I shouted at once in unison. Emeraude eyed me and then Umi, and with a naughty smirk, left us alone, not before turning off the lights.

            "It's always better in the dark," she said in a very sweet voice. Umi and I both blanched. Did she say what I think she said?

            Time suddenly stopped. Again.  

            TBC

A/N: Big thanks to Kyaa Kyaff who beta-read this piece of work. You rock!

Response to reviews

Xinderella: thank you for that piece of information, I will certainly check it out. About Ferio and his strange behaviour... as you could have already seen, he wasn't crazy or anything of the sort, he was merely teasing Umi, trying to "punish" her. Don't worry, I would never make him forget about Fuu. This is a F/F fic, after all.

Hikaru_29: Thank you for the compliments ^_^ and I hope you've enjoyed reading this new chapter which must have answered most of your questions ( or maybe not... ). This is a F/F fic, don't worry, I'm just playing with the characters to have some fun, even though I am a huge fan of alternate pairings. Anyways, I hope you've had a wonderful New Year as well.

CrazyIceTenshi: Lol, thanks for your review, and no, Ferio's not mad, he was just teasing Umi. She's a tough girl, that's why he had to resort to drastic measures with her. It was the only way to scare her, believe me. Don't worry about your rambling, I find it quite fun to read your comments. ^_^

Kaze: Thank you very much for your kind words, I am really pleased to know you're enjoying this story and my writing style.  It was hard in the beginning to write this fic, because I had never tried to write something with a character's point of view, but I am glad that people have received this fic quite well. I try my best to make this story realistic and in character, even though Ferio is very different from the one in the series. He's more sarcastic, more mature, with lots of opinion about the world. I try to add his opinions in the story, to make it more personal, and I think this was what called your attention, at least, it called my beta-reader's attention^_^ . I can't promise a happy ending, but I will certainly think about it. Actually, I already know what the end of this story will be like, but I can't tell it to anyone. But, relax, it will be a good one. Hopefully. ^_~

Bunny Fuu Fuu: Thanks for the review, and yes, it was quite a twist, wasn't it? I don't actually like the pairing Ferio/Umi, even though I like Fuu/Eagle. But, this is a F/F fic, so I will tell Ferio that he can't cheat on Fuu. He's got a naughty brain, ya know. Lol.

Liadel: Lol, I can see you're really pissed off, but don't worry, this chapter probably has calmed down your anger. Ferio hasn't forgotten about Fuu, he was just trying to "persuade" Umi with an odd tactic.

Kyaa Kyaff: Thank you girl for your review, and yes, I know how much you've enjoyed the last chapter. It was a really interesting twist, wasn't it? ^_~