This shitty ass story is dedicated to my dearest friend Wilkins, who has inspired me with many ideas for this garbage. This story is simply written as a joke between me and friends but feel to enjoy it if you like. This is just me doing shitty writing.

Warning: Will contain errors, be shitty,have shitty memes, pure weirdness etc.

You know I didn't expect to die this young, nor did I expect to die in my first day of COLLEGE. Why? Why me of all people? My life wasn't supposed to turn out like this. Drama queen much. I was a good student, had good grades, got accepted to well known university and for what, for me to just end up dead inside of an Uber? I should have taken the bus when I had the chance. Talk about living the scholar life.

God damn it, if I don't see Harambe in animal heaven then I don't know what life is anymore. Oh wait I don't have a life.

Dicks out for Harambe.

Dying was not on my list for things to do today. You know after wasting my summer break watching anime and television shows, I can see why death came upon me. It was bound to happen at some point I just thought I would die from wasting away my life or from food. I didn't anticipate dying in an Uber, I should have listened to mother and gotten myself a job, I could have at least been a prostitute.

I would have made a fine hooker with my hairy ass legs and hardcore knowledge of hentai. Good thing I wasn't that useless like a character I know, what was his name again? Oh right, Yamcha. Jeez good thing I'm not useless like him.

I hear he's been HANGING AROUND a few places.

Get it, HANGING AROUND.

Kill my self.

This is God's way of punishing me for being a weeaboo. Running like Naruto, learning lyrics to openings/endings, playing a children's card game, performing jutsu signs, and the list goes on. I have sinned. Yup defiantly being punished.

Not to mention all those times I had gay fantasies about Mark, my teacher a.k.a sugar daddy or the fact I was secretly in love with my best friend who is in fact straight. Was I straight straight? No, not at all, I was just a little bitch.

They once asked me, "Top or Bottom?"

Bottom boi

Dicks out for me.

Back to me dying, well technically already dead. If only my Uber driver was looking at the road instead of trying to catch a dragonite on pokemon go, I would have gotten that dragonite and be on my way to catch them all. So much for living the college experience.

No more dicks for me.

Heck I don't even know where I am right now, I can't see or feel my body at all. My vision was dark, like my soul. Emo alert. All I remember is the impact of the car and then badaboom I was dead. I didn't even feel a thing.

They ask you how you are and you just have to say you're fine and you'r not really fine...

Yup dying didn't hurt all whatsoever.

I'm dead and everyone I know is alive. I didn't even get to say goodbye to most of my friends before heading off to college. I had said goodbye to my family but I promised them I would come visit next month and yet that's not going to happen anytime soon. No longer would I be able to confess my undying love for my best friend. No longer would I be able to watch some weeaboo crap. Weeaboo crap? Damn it, now I won't be able to finish reading Fairy Tail.

Great, I should have died once the manga was finished then I would have been able to finish reading it, but noooo I just had to die in a Uber.

What was the purpose of my life then, if Fairy Tail wasn't there with me?

A disgrace.

Suddenly I was moving, my body was being pushed out? Suddenly my vision was faced with pure white. Did I actually manage to go to heaven? And here I thought I would be dancing with the Devil. Talk about sinning so much.

Once my vision adjusted to the light I noticed my surroundings, I was staring at a...doctor? A rumbling feeling bristled in my chest. I tried moving my hands but was unable to feel them or lift them up in any form.

"Congratulations, you have a healthy baby boy"

Wait. What. Baby? Did he just say baby?

Triggered.

Concerned with my thoughts, I didn't realized I was being handed over.

"My, what strong looking boy, what should we call him?'' I was faced with two new found figures, the man that spoke and a woman cradling me. Also is this really happening?

"Leon Fein, that will be his name. Hello, I'm your Kaa-chan." Wait..what kind of name is Leon. Only I would get a gay ass name, at least it sounded pretty lit.

Hold up, did she just say "Kaa-chan?'' What a freaking weeaboo.

"He sure is a quiet baby." Soon as the words were spoken I began feeling a lump in my throat and suddenly it burst out, the room was flooded with loud cries.

Aw shit I was crying.

God damn it I was a baby.

Probably an ugly one too.

Welp I won't be seeing Harambe anytime soon.