A Lesson Learned:

"Normal speech"

"Nine-tails speech"

Disclaimer: Nope. Still don't own Naruto.

This will be my first try at a humor fic. Please keep the bashing to a minimum.

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"You are weak, Naruto. Weak like your pathetic father and that fat bitch, Kushina."

The nine-tails growled as it was pulling Naruto's chakra away from his body. They were stuck in the chakra tug-of-war and it seemed that the Kyuubi was winning. Despite all this, Naruto smirked. "You lose, Kyuubi. And I thought you'd know all about the ancient laws; namely the most important one of those." The Kyuubi seemed to be lost in thought for a moment before it bared it fangs in a feral grin. Deciding to humor the blonde, the Kyuubi added, "And what would that be?"

Despite his compromising situation, Naruto's grin widened. "Never call an Uzumaki woman fat." The Kyuubi scowled. "Huh? Wha- " Before the fox could continue, chakra chains wrapped around its tails, its snout, and its whole body. Kyuubi's pull on the chakra weakened as its eyes widened in disbelief. "No way!"

Standing before the great fox was Uzumaki Kushina, her rage palpable in the chamber as her hair flew behind her back. The Kyuubi tried in vain to break apart the chains and escape its doom. However, luck was not on its side as the chains withstood the struggle. The nine tailed fox seemed to be sweating bullets now, if that was even possible.

Kushina made her way towards Naruto and said, "Naruto dear, will you give mommy a couple of minutes. There is this big bad fox that I need to deal with." Naruto nodded with an ear splitting grin, "Go ahead mom. It's all yours."

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"So, tell me again, Naruto. How did you manage to absorb the Kyuubi's chakra?" Yamato asked the blonde, clearly believing that he had misheard the blonde the first time.

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(A/N: Done. Was it any good? Please let me know in the reviews.)