Chapter One Shad At Home

It's about time, it's about flight,

Travelling faster than the speed of light.

It's about time, it's about space,

About cave people in the strangest place,

About cave people and the brave crew,

As through the barrier of time they flew,

Past the Roman Senator,,

Past an armoured knight,

Past the fighting minutemen,

To this modern site.

It's about time for you and me,

To meet these people from a million B.C.

It's about two astronauts, and how they educate,

A prehistoric women, and her prehistoric mate,

It's about time for you to see

How these people from a million BC

Adapted to the time of you and me!

Here in the amazing 20th century!

For now four years have passed

Since the astronauts have realized to tell of their friends' prehistoric origins,

Would to their guests be a terrible fate,

Shad and her family would be examined and poked by scientists

Til their dying date! (1)

But here is how, at last, our visitors ceased to be,

The guests of our two astronauts who travelled to a million BC.

Was a happy ending, or was it a catastrophe?

It's about time!

Shad should have been having a great day. There was a lot of excitement about, what with all the good news coming from all directions.

Why, Shad had been having the best time she'd ever had since Mac and Hec took her and her family over the hill with them.

An even better than when Hec took her to a "store". There, by trading little green pieces of paper and little disks of metal, she could get all sorts of food, clothes and other interesting odds and ends. For a long time, Hec and Mac went with Shad as Shad was always unclear exactly how much green paper the storekeeper needed.

It was even more confusing as there were several different kinds of green paper, some worth more than others!

The storekeeper once asked Mac if he wanted to get Shad "credit". Mac said "No!". In fact, he said "no" very loudly! So Shad went, and continued to give the little green papers to the man or woman at the machine that ringed and dinged.

Machines! It had been a long time since Mac explained to her what a machine was. It was something built by this strange group of people over the hill to help them, or entertain them, or do something.

Machines weren't animals at all. But they were interesting, and there were so many kinds. There were lights that turned on with switched - glowing through see-through bulbs. There were picture-boxes to watch. There were boxes to keep food cold and boxes to warm it up. The machines had made the very clothes she was wearing.

It was a "faux fur" dress. Whatever a faux was, Shad didn't know. But it was the only kind of fur Mac said they could get. It was softer and more comfortable than her older hides she had taken with her from the village.

The "faux" was also in the style of the people over here, so Shad could go anywhere she wanted without people staring or paying attention. Of course, Shad along with the rest of her family had to take some time to agree to where the funny clothes Mac and Hec liked. But, now that Shad was used to it, they weren't bad at all. (2)

If only Gronk thought differently! He'd been pestering Shad all morning.

"Why you wear those silly furs!" said Gronk, bitterly. "You have nice fur I hunted for you in bedroom!"

Gronk had been watching the picture box calling television, but his favourite "show" wasn't on any more and that annoyed him.

"That very nice fur" said Shad, diplomatically. "But no good to wear fur husband Gronk hunted for me all the time. Fur wear out! And there no place near here to hunt new fur."

"There nothing here" said Gronk dismissively. "What's a great hunter to do here?"

"Help Shad in "apartment" of Mac and Hec. Just because we're going to move to new home don't make it a reason for us not to keep apartment clean!"

The apartment wasn't the original one bedroom furnished apartment rented from the apoplectic Mr. Tyler. It was a larger three-bedroom furnished apartment, though still in the same building - meaning that Mr. Tyler was still apoplectic about the cave family, though he had far less occasion to be outraged than in years past.

The place was still tight quarters for so many people. As a girl had to have her room, and a married couple likewise, the arrangement was obvious. Gronk and Shad had their own room, Mlor had hers. And for the last four years, Breer, Mac and Hec each had a bunk in the last room.

"I feel like I'm bunking in a berth on a destroyer" Hec had complained to Mac.

"Well, it's the only way we can afford it" Mac had observed. "That's if we want any money left over for us."

And speaking of Hec . . . .

"Silly for father to move in with daughter and soon-to-be son-in-law" complained Gronk. "Hec should move in with us!"

"Hec already living with us" said Shad. "We and Breer moving into big new "house" with him. Hec show Mlor house himself."

Shad picked up a newspaper ad for a new split-level home.

"Very nice looking house-cave"

"This silly custom!" said Gronk, disapprovingly. "Besides, silly "house" made of wood. Burn down if catch on fire. Why Hec buy?"

"It much bigger than apartment" Shad explained. "Hec can marry Mlor, they can have privacy, they can have children, and have space for brother-in-law Breer and father-in-law Gronk and mother-in-law Shad too."

"Gronk don't know if Mlor should marry Hec" said Gronk. "He back out of marriage before." (3)

"That marriage under custom of our village" observed Shad. "Here, it much easier on husband. No build wall, no taste yuck soup. Besides, Hec and Mlor very happy around each other.

Happier as time goes by. Hec spend years looking at picture he take of Mlor, talk to himself when he think no one around:

Shad imitated Hec's voice.

"Should I marry Mlor?

A cavegirl?

But what a cavegirl! Sweet, beautiful. Besides, I would have married her "back-on-the-other-side-of-the-hill" if the basic training wasn't so tough!

And people are people! And a girl's a girl! Especially a girl like Mlor!

Mrs. Hector Canfield?

Yeah, yeah. I'll ask. Soon as I get my promotion and can support her!

Eventually Hec say, "maybe sooner." "I don't think I can wait." But then Hec and Mac each get "promotion." Hec take Mlor to dinner, come home, ask for her hand. Gronk say yes, Hec can take whole of Mlor! Both engaged to be married. Mlor very happy. Breer, happy. Shad, very, very happy. Soon see grandkids!

"Bah" said Gronk. "Weddings ceremonies over hill silly. Customs all backwards here. Still wish we were back home on our side of hill."

"Boss and Clon try to kill us for stealing stone from idol" reminded Shad. "Besides Mac explain. When we go into flying machine of astronauts, we don't just go over hill. We go way, way over the hill and can only use machine to get back! Mac and Hec don't have machine anymore, and besides machine very very hard to fly back to other side of hill. They don't know if they can do it!

Besides, Shad no longer want to go back. No longer want to go back for long time now. It nice here, food good, even though no real dinosaur, mastodon, or giant kookoorooka birds to cook."

"Them only things worth cooking" observed Gronk

"You make chicken just right, it can taste like dinosaur, mastadon or kookoorooka" Shad pointed out.

"Still not the real thing" said Gronk.

"Oh Gronkie" sighed Shad. "When will Gronkie be happy to be on this side of hill?"

Notes

(1) In "Our Brothers' Keepers," Mac and Hec decide to keep the news of their friends arrival secret as otherwise they'll be taken to Washington for tests.

(2) In "The Stone Age Diplomats", Shad and the rest of the family prove reluctant to wear modern clothes.

(2) "To Sign or Not to Sign" sees Shad and Gronk unknowingly spend a fortune by signing for the goods of various salespersons.

(3) "Have I Got A Girl For You"