Hiii there! Okay this is my last thing for the okikagu week, so I hope you all enjoy it!
Day 04: Time skip.
Get back..
"This is the end you damn Sadist." Those were her last words before leaving, he never saw her anymore before that...
For years he tried to court her, to make her noticed his feelings, it wasn't a simple thing, and sometimes he was really close to just give up, but his attempts finally were for something when she turned 16, after a quick confession from him and a simply and shy 'yes' as her answer they got together. And they surely worked well, their usual fights were only more fun, their dates were more of a game than anything else, each other trying to steal a kiss, being with her was his favorite thing on the world.
But of course, when things could go wrong they would go wrong.
They never had a real fight (one in where they were really mad with each other), and everything seemed to be working perfectly for them, their feelings were mutual, everything was fun. But the problems arrived when he got more and more possessive, more jealous, he tried to calm himself, he tried to control himself, he really did. But people didn't care that she was his girlfriend and she, she was just too careless, talking to guys as if nothing was wrong, letting them saw her with those intentions on their eyes.
He was just trying to protect her, to keep her safe from those guys, he tried to talk with her, told her that it was dangerous to be like that, but she never listened to him, saying that she was fine, that she could protect herself, no one (apart from himself) could win her in a fight. But he knew better, a guy could use something apart from his own strength, they could trick her, they could put something on her drink, they could make her do things she didn't wanted. But she never thought of that possibility, she keep on being careless, she keep on being friendly with guys that were fishy.
He tried to control himself, he really tried, but when he heard those guys talking of doing things to her, of inviting her to a drink and putting something on it. Hearing the disgusting ways of talking about her, he couldn't help it.
It only took him 10 minutes to kill them all.
She found him in the middle of the bodies, he was covered in blood, his katana still on the back of one of the guys. She didn't want to hear him out, even if she knew what kind of person he was, even if she loved him like that, seeing him there, surrounded of the guys she thought as friends, that was too much for her. She left.
He followed her as fast as he could, calling her name, not caring of the mess he left behind.
The fight started.
She didn't care why he did it, she didn't even hear his reasons no matter how much he tried to talk with her, the times he screamed he did it for her, to protect her. It didn't matter anymore, he could saw that on her eyes, full of disappointment, sadness, hate.
He took it too far, and this time she wouldn't forgive him. "This is the end you damn Sadist." The cold words left her mouth, this time he didn't say anything, he knew that he took it far, but he was only trying to protect her...
She gave him another disappointed look before leaving, even if he tried to look for her, she disappeared in the middle of the night, without giving him the chance to told her the bad things they were saying or to even mumble a 'I'm sorry'.
The next day when he arrived at the Yorozuya she was long gone, not even Gintoki could told him where she was, and if he did knew, he lied very well.
Not long before that, the guys he killed were found guilty of many of the rapes that happened near Edo, of course Kagura was their next victim, but she never knew that…
For the next months he visited the Yorozuya everyday, hoping that in one of those times she would be there, waiting to receive him, letting him explain why he did that. But when the rumors of Gura the alien huntress began to be more and more popular, and when Gintoki with sad told him that they were true, he, he gave up.
Three years passed before him even knowing…
He became more reckless, without a care in his world his way of killing became more and more cruel, after all he lost the only two people he loved more than anything else, why would he show mercy when the world surely didn't show any to him? No, there was no way he could show it, in every face of every men he killed he could saw the face of the guys that tried to attack Kagura, he could saw the little he tried to get her back after that, but more than anything he could saw the disappointed look that Kagura gave him the last time he saw her.
He couldn't help but to put all his anger and frustration in every slice of his sword.
But even that was taken from him, Kondo afraid of him going on rampage stop him from going with them to their missions, sure he knew that that was because they were worried for him, afraid that he might do a massacre, afraid that he might get himself killed, but it was the only thing that keep him from going crazy, from drowning on his own anger, on his frustration and his regrets.
In a way it was weird, killing people to let his anger out, but it worked for him. So when he couldn't go and kill more, he had to improvise. During trainings he couldn't control himself, the feeling of having a sword on his hands (even if it was a wooden one) felt good, but at the same time the look that Kagura gave him appear on his rival's face, those disappointed eyes, they quickly lose the count of the injured.
And just as the same of what happened with him going on missions, his training was restringed, no more rivals from him, just him and the wooden sword, with no one to fight, with no one to hit, just him, his sword, and those eyes looking at him whenever he was.
His anger rising, his frustration increasing more and more, what if he had go behind Kagura that day? What if he hadn't kill those guys? Those thoughts were always on his mind, and every time he reject them, she was in space doing her own job, she had probably forgotten about him a long time ago. But being on the headquarters all day, with nothing to do and no one to fight, he couldn't help those thoughts, he couldn't help but to remember that look every time he closed his eyes.
It didn't took him long to start hitting the walls, but it was not until his hands were bleeding than Kondo finally let him do a mission.
Be the bodyguard of the princess in one of her meetings with the Amantos, it was a really simple one and his younger self would have complained for doing it, but not now. He would do whatever he could just to get out of the headquarters, to have something else to focus apart from Kagura, just to have responsibilities over his shoulders and his katana on his hips, even if that meant being the babysitter of the princess. He said yes before Hijikata could even finished telling him the mission.
His hair tightly tied, his uniform clean and almost new (it has been month since the last time his uniform got stained with blood), his katana clean and ready to be used resting on his hips, even if all that was normal a while ago, he couldn't help but to feel better that day.
It didn't took him long to arrive at the castle in where the princess was waiting for him outside, and the guards running to the gate at top speed to where she was. As reckless as Kagura was, huh? The thought came even if he didn't want it, after all back in when Kagura was still on Earth she and the princess were great friends. So seeing her now, it was impossible to not think of Kagura, and how she might look now.
Probably she had her hair longer, right? Last time he saw her she was letting her hair grow, so she would probably have it as long as Soyo's hair by now... She had to be even more stronger too, fighting with aliens wasn't easy, and her body… She would be beautiful too, right? Well she was always beautiful for him, even when she was a little brat. STOP IT. He had to stop himself, he had already told himself that he was going to give up with, she wasn't going to come back, he knew that well.
"It's been a while Okita-san." She said with a gentle smile, reminding him of the nice smiles Kagura had when she was with him.
"Indeed, it's been a long time. Last time was when…" When she was still here. He couldn't finished it, and by the look that Soyo had she probably knew what he was going to say. "Are you ready to go?" He quickly said while offering his left hand to her, his right hand resting of his katana, ready to use it if he had to.
"Yes thank you." She said while grabbing his arm. "That would be it boys." She added to the guards that were catching their breath, they only looked at her with worried eyes before nodding.
I'm more than enough to protect her. He knew that well and the guards did too, when he became more reckless and before Kondo started keeping him under control, rumors about him got out. If Hijikata was a demon, he was a monster.
They didn't talk much during the way to the meeting, both of them lost in their own thoughts, probably remembering the last time they saw each other...
Two months after Kagura's disappearance, he went to the castle, looking for her, for some clue, something, he was the one who told her what happened and what he did. Even if she didn't know anything about Kagura, she didn't blame him, and he was grateful for that.
But that wasn't helping the awkward mood that was surrounding them, especially when she wanted to ask for Kagura, she wasn't saying it, but he knew, the quick looks she was giving him, how her lips were moving without saying anything, even if she thought that he didn't notice that, he did.
"I don't know anything." He said trying to sound cold, but he sound more hurt than anything else.
The silence grew even more stronger after that. "I-it's a beautiful day today, don't you think Okita-san?" She said in her best attempt of changing the topic, something he was glad she did. Thinking about her… It would only distract him instead of doing his mission, and hell he couldn't ruin this one.
"It is." He simply said while looking up to the sky, it was kind of weird of the sky out there could be different from the one he could saw on the headquarters, there it was always gloom and gray, but that day the sky was blue with some clouds here and there, and the sun shining.
Back then those kinds of days were their favorites ones to fight, some days he would go to the Yorozuya, the others they would met on the park or the bridge after his patrols for the city, and they would fight until sunset, sometimes when the weather wasn't that good they would go to their favorite dango shop in where they would talk, sure his wallet wouldn't be the same as before, but seeing her eating that happily, it was more than enough for him.
But then I killed those guys… For years he tried to convince himself that what he did was the right thing, in a way he saved from them, but what meaning had saving her when she didn't even know about that? When she hated him for doing that...
If only I… The hand that was resting over his katana moved just a little, enough to grabbed the hand of the sword. Would he change what he did..?
"Okita-san!" Soyo's voice brought him back to reality, the girl had her cheeks red and the hand that was on his arm was pressing a little hard, trying to catch his attention.
"Sorry, I got a little too lost in thought, huh?" He said, in his face a sad smile appeared, one that he didn't even notice.
"Oh no, don't worry Okita-san." She said in a hurry while trying to put on her best smile. "I just want to say you that we arrived, so it's best for you to get ready!" She started walking in the direction of the building in front of them, while pulling him in the process.
The meeting was taking place in one of the buildings near the castle, one of the safest buildings too, lots of guards everywhere, even in that kind of situation the guards of the castle were more than enough to care of her, and protect her if any of the amantos tried to do something fishy. So him being there, it was probably just because Hijikata tried to get him out of the headquarters and have him under control with the guards in the building, that or… She was the one requesting me. He gave a quick look, that made sense right? Why would he, of all the people, be the one to protect her?
He sighed, even if that was the reason of all that, he would have to admit that he didn't care, that got him outside of the headquarters and gave him back his katana, it was more than enough. And since the building was that safe there was no need for him to worry about someone trying to attack the princess.
Or at least that's what he thought at first.
They were walking on the hall that would take them to meeting place when he started hearing footsteps coming in their direction, at first they were soft and normal, but when they started getting more loud and faster, he could feel the danger coming. Everything happened fast after that...
It only took him one second to pull his katana out and stop right at the neck of the stranger, and to quickly he pull the princess behind him. But to his surprised there was no stranger ready to attack him, in their place two blue eyes were looking at him surprised. There was no guy either, in front of him was a beautiful girl with long hair and an elegant kimono. A girl that he knew well.
Kagura! He screamed internally, his body not reacting, his mind not believing what he was seeing, she was there, right in front of him, she was back.
"Tsk. I see that you're as ready to kill as always," the surprised look in her eyes was nowhere to be seen, in their place was now a look full of hate, just the same that she give him the last time they met. Her hand elegantly moved the sword from her neck. "You damn Sadist." She said with disgust in her voice, he could feel the hate in everyone of her words.
"Ka-kagura-chan?" Soyo behind him, just as him, she couldn't believe that she was back, and even less that she was there. "Wh-when did you came back?" Little by little she started coming out from Sougo's back and walked to where her friend was.
She glared Sougo once more time, and he understood what she wanted to say. I'm not welcome here, huh? "I'll wait for you somewhere else." He simply said while putting his katana back in where it belong, and with difficulty he left, not before giving her a last look.
She was almost as tall as he was now, even with being that near to her she could feel how strong she was, her eyes burning with hate for him, her body completely different from what she was. She was just as how he imagined her, but the joy of the little kid he loved was nowhere to be seen.
Probably my fault too...
What is this bastard doing here? She felt how her heart stopped when she saw him, and to think that he almost tried to kill her too. I shouldn't have come. And all because she accepted of going to that damn meeting just because her father didn't want to
"You're back Kagura-chan!" Soyo said happily before hugging her with all her strength, she hugged the princess back after some seconds, maybe coming back wasn't that bad. "Why didn't you told me you were coming back?! I would have prepared you a huge party!" She added with tears on her eyes. "I missed you so much Kagura-chan, everyone did too!"
"Sorry, sorry." She said while going back to her usual self. "I just didn't want to see him, you know? But seems it was all for nothing." And to think that she was extra careful during her trip, no telling anyone of her arrival.
"Are you still mad at him Kagura-chan?" She asked serious after breaking the hug. "Look I know that what he did may be bad but…"
"May be bad? Soyo-chan he killed my friends! And just because he was fucking jealous of them! What he did was freaking horrible!" The memories of seeing him there, in the middle of the bodies of her friends, his hands stained with their blood, she would never forget it.
"But Kagura, you don't know? They…" She tried to say something but Kagura quickly interrupted her.
"What if he keep on killing everyone just because he was jealous, huh? Would Gin-chan be next?! Would Shinpachi be next?!" She asked letting all her anger out, maybe disappearing as she did was not the best thing to do, but that helped to keep Gintoki and Shinpachi safe, and helped her to forget him. I really shouldn't have come.
"But Kagura-chan, you go it…" Again the princess tried hard to tell her something, but she didn't want to listen. He probably put all his stupid excuses on her mind, huh?. First Gintoki trying to stop her, then Shinpachi and now Soyo? Why couldn't any of them understand what she was trying to do? She was only trying to protect them from him!
"I don't want to talk about that Soyo-chan." She said with a hurt tone, her hand closed in a fist. Why does everyone always take his side? She couldn't understand it. She tried so hard to forget about his feelings just to keep them safe and that was the way that they acted now. "I-I don't want to talk." She simply said before walking somewhere else, Soyo calling for her, but she, she didn't want to listen anymore.
But the universe wasn't being nice to her that day, and her vain try of escaping only lead her to where Sougo was, sitting on a bench in an empty hallway. Fuck. There was simply no way to escape from that, not without confronting any of them. Fuck!
"Leave me alone!" She begged, but the princess keep on running to her direction and now Sougo was aware that she was there. "Leave me alone." Soyo was in of front of her now, and she could feel how Sougo's eyes were focused on her, her heart beating faster and faster. Stop it! But whenever it was for Soyo, Sougo, or the feelings that were waking up she didn't knew.
"But you need to know Kagura-chan." Soyo speak calm and carefully she put her hands over Kagura's cheeks, maybe to make sure she wasn't going to run. "Those guys you thought were your friends, they… They were trying to attack you… I mean… They were rapists Kagura-chan." She said, she could saw how sincere the words of Soyo were. "You were their next victim."
Her heart stopped in that moment.
What are they doing? I thought she didn't want to see me? He could only saw that Soyo was holding Kagura's face and that after some seconds Kagura fell onto her knees, but whatever was happening there was a mystery to him.
Some seconds later Soyo got onto her knees too and started patting her back, and with her eyes she called him. That's a bad idea. Him going to where she was, would probably just make things worst too. He shooked his head, it was much better to just stay where he was.
But Soyo didn't thought the same as him, the words 'come here' simply left her mouth and there was no way he could refused something coming from the princess, right?
Not sure of what he was doing, or if it was good for him to get to where they were, he walked slowly and careful, or at least that was his idea until he heard Kagura sobbing on the floor. Before he knew it he was already running to where she was.
"Ka-China? Are you okay?!" He said worried, but reminding himself of not using her name, he got on his knees too and carefully he was going to pat her hair, but stopped midway. That wouldn't help. "Is something wrong?" He asked, now he was trying to not show much emotions, knowing that the simple fact of talking with her would make her mad.
But before he could put his hand on his knee, she grabbed him. "I-is that tr-true?" She asked with difficulty. What? "I-is true th-that they tri-tried to do som-something bad to m-me?" She asked again while lifting her head to look at him, the tears were falling down to the floor.
There was no need for him to ask who those guys were. He knew. "Yes." He simply answered resisting his need of comforting her in that moment. She told her, huh? He gave Soyo a quick look and the girl only nodded.
"W-why didn't y-you to-told me?" She asked, her blue eyes were now getting a little red. "Y-you stupid Sadist?" She said, but this time his nickname wasn't an insult, and the hate on her look was nowhere to be seen.
"I tried, but you didn't let me Kagura."
A little laugh came out of her lips. "Shut up Sadist." He was expecting her to hit him, but instead of that she pulled him closer, enough for their foreheads to touch each other. "Do you know how many years I was tried to forget about you?! It was so damn hard, you know? Thinking that I had to run away to protect everyone, that I had to forget these feelings."
It wasn't easy for me either. His free hand was now touching her hair. "Did you forget about me?" He asked.
She didn't answer, she only grabbed his collar with her free hand and brought their lips together, it was a simply kiss, more like just their lips touching than what a kiss to be honest, but it was the answer that he needed. "I'm sorry." She said as soon as she broke the kiss. "I was such a fucking idiot! Running away like that, not even hearing to what you had to say…" The tears were falling once again.
He only brought her closed, and hugged her with all his strength, her face now hidden in his chest. "But you are back now." He answered while closing his eyes and focusing on giving her all his love through that hug.
They would have time to talk later.
Fin.