"Tobias," I whisper, my voice sounding slightly whiny as I brush his arm with my hand. "Tobias, no." I glance nervously towards the door to his room, Marcus told us to each go to our own bedrooms while he had his meeting with the council members, not both of us go to Tobias'. 'Useless' items surround us as we sit on the stained gray carpet, another reason I don't want Marcus walking in on us. The blue sculpture that resembles falling water sits in Tobias' lap as he runs his fingers over the creases.
"Joey, I'm not leaving you here with him." He says. I remind him to whisper by placing my finger to my lips. Marcus always tells us to be quiet when he has someone over, wouldn't want us ruining that precious reputation of his.
"Tobias you have to leave. You have to." I insist. "It'll only be a year. I'll be fine."
"Jo-" He starts,
"Tobias, I don't care which damn one you join but for god sakes, don't you dare stay in Abnegation." I snap, geez what'll it take? His eyes widen in at my use of a swear, I have never sworn in his presence before. He has many more bruises and cuts than I do. If Marcus ever tried to hurt me when Tobias was around, he would push me out of the way and get hurt himself, but of course, Tobias wasn't always around. He shakes his head.
"Two years. It would be two years." He corrects me. "I won't leave you with him for that long!"
"You will!" I say, wiping a tear from just under my eye with the heel of my hand.
"Tob-" I start, I hear footsteps. Hide Tobias mouths. Where? I reply silently. He points under his bed, his long finger directing me to where our backs lean against. I push the items into their trunk and shove the trunk under the bed, near the head, and slip under myself. He places the sculpture under the pillow and runs to the twisting doorknob just in time to pull the chair out from under it. I curl up on my side, holding my breath.
"What was that doing over here?" Marcus asks. "Were you trying to keep me out?"
"No, sir." Tobias says.
"That's the second time you've lied to me today." Marcus says. His breathing is shallow, like it always is before his anger overtakes him. "I didn't raise my son to be a liar."
"I-" Tobias starts. I see his gray shoes moving as he walks over to place the chair in front of his desk.
"What were you doing in here that you didn't want me to see?"Marcus questions, suspicion in his voice.
"Nothing." Tobias says, his voice almost a whisper.
"That's three lies." Marcus warns.
"Where's your sister?" He asks, finally understanding. My body shakes and I try to keep still.
"Probably in her room." Tobias says. I watch Marcus' shoes head out the door, towards my room. I crawl out from under the bed. I stand up and dust myself off, remembering to straighten my posture. We stand next to each other in silence, Tobias bites his lip from nerves and I crack my knuckles. Marcus walks in speedily, as soon as he sees me, he grabs my shirt, the fabric balling up in his fist. He drags me out of the room and down the hall.
"No, please dad, no!" I beg, trying my hardest not to start crying again.
"Don't whine." He snaps, stopping for barely a second to slap me. I fight against his grasp but his grip only tightens.
"Please dad, put me in instead!" Tobias says, following closely behind us. While he's deathly afraid of small spaces, my fear is even worse. Marcus simply pushes Tobias away from us with his free hand in response. He shoves me toward the closet door, I turn back around to face him and try to run past. He catches my shoulder, holds me still and hits me across the cheek. Forehand, backhand. Both cheeks burn with pain. He tries to shove me in the closet again, this time successful. My shoulders graze the sides of the closet, the slanted ceiling makes for an uncomfortable, hunched position. I close my eyes and press my palms against the side walls, no matter how I move, I can still feel the walls pressing against my body. I feel like I might vomit. I bang my hand against the door and it shakes and rattles with the impact, still refusing to open. I breathe heavily and quickly, not letting out as much air as I'm letting in. I squeeze my eyes tighter shut and try to imagine myself someplace else. In my head, I sit in the cafeteria at school, alone, if Tobias and I had the same lunch time, he would be with me. I bite into my plain chicken sandwich, the image becomes so real, I can almost taste the bland, unseasoned chicken nested between two slices of stale bread. The sound of Marcus stomping Tobias up the stairs above me yanks me out of my dream world. I know it's no use, but I kick against the door, it shakes again, but keeps me locked inside. I hear Marcus yelling upstairs.
"This is rank with self-indulgence! It poisons this house with selfishness!" A few moments of silence pass then I hear Tobias first yell of pain as the belt makes contact with his back. All I want to do is help him, but I am trapped within the confines of this closet, where the walls seem to shrink in on me, where the confinement makes me nauseous with fear, where I am completely helpless. I shake the small doorknob but it doesn't allow me to turn it. I want to scream, so I do, but into my hand so that Marcus doesn't hear. Tears slide over my still stinging cheeks. I rest my head and palms against the door and bang my forehead against it in frustration. Tobias yells again at an especially hard lash.
The door finally opens, the harsh light from the lamp hurts my eyes. I squint at the figure. Marcus. I stand and straighten my back, shutting the closet door as soon as I get out.
"Have you been crying?" Marcus asks. Likely noticing the streams of halfway dried tears on my cheeks and my red puffy eyes.
"No." I say. Stupid stupid. I tell myself. He purses his lips.
"What were you doing in your brother's room?" He asks, his voice raising in volume the tiniest bit.
"Nothing." I say. Stupid again.
"You and Tobias and your lies!" He shouts, slapping me. Tobias comes running down the stairs, his shirt ripped and bloodstained on the back. Marcus shoves me into the wall and punches my stomach twice, I cough.
"I didn't raise my children to be so selfish!" He says, hitting me again.
"Please stop dad!" Tobias begs.
"It's for her own good." Marcus says, shoving Tobias away and continuing to beat me.