On Your Wings

God, give us love in the time that we have

BETH

Beth plunged her fingers into the sun warmed earth of the prison yard, hollowing out a tiny space for another new seedling. Carefully, she settled a sprig of lavender into its new home, pressing it into the ground with a few light taps. Rick might be trying his hand at playing farmer with her Daddy but she had the earth in her veins. Growing up on a farm had taught her that even if herbs might not be as an important as corn and tomatoes they could certainly go a long way towards making life just a little bit more comfortable.

Last seedling planted Beth sat back on her knees and surveyed her handy work with a contented sigh. Long rows of flourishing green plants spread out before her. Mint, lavender, basil, garlic, and thyme were all represented, edged with a border of chicken wire that would hopefully keep the rabbits out... not that many rabbits dared to show their faces in the yard, not with Daryl's sharp eyes and sharper bolts just waiting for them to make an appearance.

Beth felt her cheeks warm at the thought of the hunter. After what had happened to Zac he had almost always been on a hand, a warm presence lingering in the corner of her vision, out of reach but comforting all the same. He had brought her all of those craft supplies and he had looked so nervous, almost shy standing in her cell that day... but after that he had just kinda disappeared... making himself scarce, always hunting, leading runs, or hidden away up in one of the guard towers... and well... she was honest enough to admit that she missed him. Her feelings for Daryl Dixon were a complicated tangle that she was only just beginning to figure out. Maybe she shouldn't have kissed him on the cheek. It had been impulsive and...

"Hey."

Beth nearly jumped out of her skin as Daryl's voice rumbled from above her. Twisting, she saw him standing behind her and offered him a smile. "Hey!"

Daryl's gaze swept over her handiwork, the hint of a smile tugging up one corner of his mouth.."Looks good."

Beth's own smile grew wider as she turned back to look at her little garden. "I used all the starter pods you got me. I still have some lemon grass and rosemary I'd like to get in and I'd love to find some penny royal... I've got plans!"

"Weather looks good. Could go right now if ya want."

Beth scrambled to her feet, wiping her suddenly sweaty palms on the thighs of her jeans. A warm excited glow started to bubble in her stomach as she met his eyes. "You'll really take me out?"

He shrugged, his focus skittering outwards across the yard and the cloudless blue sky. "Don't see why not."

Beth gnawed at her lower lip, trying to keep her reaction in check. "On the bike?"

Daryl shrugged again both hands clutching the crossbow strap that crossed his chest. "If ya want... Know a place s'not to far."

He seemed to be looking anywhere but her but she didn't care. He was offering her freedom! It had been nearly a year since she had seen anything but jagged wire fences and dirty cement blocks. She appreciated the hard fought safety of their home she itched to feel the wind on her face.

"Oh my lord Daryl! Let me get my bag!" Beth took off for her room. Turning back but still keeping her momentum she saw him standing there brow furrowed and the tips of his ears glowing faintly red through his long hair. "I'll meet you at the gates!" She didn't even wait for his acknowledgment before turning and dashing for the cell bock so that he wouldn't have a chance to change his mind.

Her thoughts were a twisted mess. She was going out on a run! She was going out on a run with Daryl Dixon. She was going out on a run with Daryl Dixon on the back of his motorcycle... Oh God her daddy was going to spit fire when he found out or worse yet he was going to give her a sad eyed lecture about how much of a disappointment she was. She felt a pang of guilt well up in her throat but pushed it aside. She needed this. She needed to get out of the prison if even for a few a hours.

Beth knew it was dangerous, knew it was a risk... what wasn't these days... but the golden glow that had started bubbling up in her earlier was now a full roiling boil in the pit of her stomach and she didn't want to let go of that feeling. She wanted Daryl to think she was... well capable maybe, heck she wanted the whole prison to think she was capable... more than just a babysitter... and maybe she wanted Daryl to think that she was ugh... extra capable or worth something maybe, worth his attention anyway. Beth was so preoccupied that she nearly ran over Carl who was lingering in the door way of the prison.

"Ugh Greene where's the fire?" Carl griped, dodging her and stepping backwards into the room that served as their main living space.

Beth paused for a moment, taking in the younger boy's petulant expression and quickly deciding that a fight over his habit of calling her 'Greene' was a waste of time. She moved past him, tossing an apology over her shoulder. "I'm so sorry Carl! I'm just getting my bag. Hey if you see my Daddy will you tell him I'm going out?" She felt a little bad about that request but she knew Hershel wasn't in the habit of shooting messengers.

Carl trailed behind her leaning against door frame of her cell, doing a poor job of feigning nonchalance, and watching as she grabbed her backpack. "Going out? On a run?"

"Mmmhmmm," Beth murmured as she stopped in front of her mirror, quickly twisted her hair into one long braid.

"Who said you could?"

Beth stiffened and tied off the end of her hair. "I don't need permission."

"Yeah you do you're just a kid."

"No you're a kid," she snapped, turning around to face him, her temper flaring. She immediately regretted it as Carl's cheeks turned pink and his eyes narrowed. His shoulders were a tense straight line and Beth could tell that he was gearing up for a fight. A fight she didn't have time for.

"You're barely 18."

She bit her tongue hard and took a deep breath, willing herself not go get angry. "Age is just a number. You of all people should know that." He looked away from her his expression hidden by the brim of the Sheriff's hat. Beth softened, stepping forward and placing a gentle hand on his shoulder. "What's this really about?"

Carl angrily shrugged her hand off his shoulder. "You're a girl."

"Really Carl?" Beth rolled her eyes, not bothering to hide the disgust in her voice. Slinging her backpack over her shoulder she pushed past him heading for the door, willing herself to ignore the fact that he was following behind her.

"Who's even taking you out? What about Judith?" he groused, looking for any chink in her armor.

"I'm going with Daryl." Beth responded crisply, ignoring the jibe about Judith. Judith was with Rick today and that's exactly where she should be.

"You don't even have a knife."

That made her come up short and she suddenly felt a little foolish for not having thought of that right away. "I'll grab a crowbar from down by the fence," she replied quickly, trying to regain a little of her equilibrium as she stepped outside. Carl continued to follow her half way through the yard. Beth felt her temper starting to flare up again. After another particularly stinging comment about her merits as a fighter she swung around to face him. "Quit following me Carl!"

"You're gonna be so busted when you get back! If you even get back!" he yelled and then snapped his mouth shut as he realized what he had said.

"Carl!"

"I didn't mean it," Carl whispered, his gaze stuck resolutely on the ground at Beth's feet. After a long pause he continued, "I just feel stuck."

Beth's eyes swept out over the prison yard, her focus settling on the fences that kept them safe but also kept them thoroughly trapped. "Yeah... I know." She looked back at Carl who was shuffling his feet in the dirt, kicking up small poofs of dust with his tennis shoes. "Look I'll see you later okay?"

"Yeah okay," Carl shrugged and then headed back inside the prison.

She watched him go, feeling an odd mix of sympathy and annoyance. It hadn't been easy for him but then again it hadn't been easy for any of them. Sighing Beth turned and ran the rest of the way to the gates where she could see Daryl waiting.

He was busy securing his crossbow on the back of the bike when she jogged up to him. "What took you so long?"

"Carl had a few choice words for me."

Daryl nodded, the corner of his mouth lifting up in a wry half smile. "Yeah his attitude is taller than he is these days." His piercing gaze swept over her body and she repressed a shiver. "You got a weapon?"

A warm rush of blood flooded Beth's cheeks. "Oh... No I was gonna grab a crowbar but..."

Daryl grunted and unclipped the large hunting knife from his belt. After a second's hesitation he quickly pulled her forward and clasped it onto the waistband of her jeans, the rough pads of fingers just barely grazing the soft skin of her belly. He backed up quickly putting space between them but not before Beth's skin had rippled into a blanket of goosebumps. Clearing his throat he asked, "You know how to use it?"

Beth managed to shrug, words sticking in her throat. Swallowing nervously, she kicked herself mentally and commanded her brain to form coherent though. "Aim for the head? No one's ever really thought to give me a knife before... I'm a straight shot though," she added as an afterthought not wanting to appear completely useless. "That's what Rick said anyway, back on the farm..."

"Well no time like the present." He threw one leg over the bike and turned to look at her when she made no move to follow. "You comin' Greene?"

She had always hated being called Greene, it had always seemed so so informal... or sporty... or well Shawn was the one who got called Greene at school not her... but when Daryl did it, the warm gravel of his voice warmed it up, made it almost cute. "Yes sir Mr. Dixon," she replied smartly and was rewarded with a slight twist of his mouth which might have been a smile. After only a moment's pause where she had a a flashback of her mother warning her about the dangers of motorcycles Beth kicked herself into action and climbed on. She shivered as the rumble of the bike ran up her thighs and settled in her stomach.

"You're gonna wanna hang on."

She wrapped her arms around him as tight as she dared. He signaled for the gates to open and the bike surged forward. She let out a squeal of surprise, despite have sworn to herself she wouldn't, and automatically gripped Daryl tighter her hands bunching into the soft fabric of his cut off flannel. Sliding forward she pressed herself between the wings on his back, very glad that he couldn't see her face because she knew it was cherry red. He smelled like cigarettes, leather, and fresh cut grass. Suddenly being this close to him was heady, intoxicating, and it made her feel as if her blood was made of champagne, popping and fizzing in her veins as they flew down the road.

Trees, fields, and long abandoned houses and cars flashed by in bursts of greens, yellows, and browns, all topped by an aquamarine sky. She felt free. She felt like she was flying. And the crazy thing was that she felt perfectly safe, steady even, as Daryl guided the bike down the road. Giving into a daredevil urge that was quickly rising in her she sat up as straight as she could, tightened her grip on the bike with her thighs, and unhooked her fingers from Daryl's. The air rushed out of her lungs in an excited gasp as she spread her arms out wide and let the wind buffet her, the long braid of her hair snapping out behind. Daryl slowed a little sending a concerned glance behind him but she could only laugh as she caught his eye, giddy and floating from adrenaline. He smirked at her and in that moment she felt transformed. She grinned at him as the last bits of Beth from the farm, Beth that sweet child who sang in the church choir, Beth that desperate girl who took a piece of glass to her wrist, all broke off and drifted away. Content she dropped her arms and wrapped them around Daryl's waist, laughing again as he revved the motor and pushed the bike faster down the lonely gray curve of the highway.

In what felt like much too short of a time they pulled up in front of their destination and Daryl parked the bike. He climbed off and she followed suit her knees wobbling a little beneath her as her feet hit asphalt. Walking to the back of the bike he began to unstrap his crossbow. "Came here to get most of Rick's shit, but didn't take everything. Stay behind me and keep you eyes open."

Beth nodded equal parts joy and fear surging through her until she was nothing but a bundle of shaky nerves.

He looked over at her as he swung his bow behind him. "Get your knife out just in case."

Beth did, holding it in front of her.

Daryl shook his head. "Work on your stance later. Can't believe no has taught you this shit."

Beth shrugged, her excitement waning. "I'm just the babysitter." The words slipped out of her mouth before she could catch them and she realized with surprise that she didn't actually mean them quite as much anymore. Ever since Judy had been born she had been relegated as a caregiver and for the most part she was happy with that role. She loved kids and she enjoyed transforming the prison into a place that people could call a home but somewhere over the course of long winter cooped up inside she had started wanting more, to be seen as more. She knew a morning spent outside of the prison wasn't going to suddenly turn her into Maggie or Michonne, some sort of fierce warrior, but it was a step.

Daryl was looking at her, surprise clear on his face. "You're more than just a babysitter Beth."

She shrugged feeling embarrassed and began walking toward the nearest building. The place really did seem abandoned. There were three greenhouses all connected by narrow overgrown walkways. She could tell at one point they had all been painted in bright colors but the paint had begun peeling off in thick strips and most of the glass panes in the central building had been broken out. She headed for the door which hung askew on rusted hinges.

Daryl took a few quick steps forward to catch up with her, his fingers brushing her elbow. "Hey, we cleared this place out before but keep your guard up."

Beth nodded and stepped inside. It was a mess. Overturned shopping carts, shattered glass, and cracked ceramic planters littered the the area around the front door. Long grass was starting to grow up through the cracked and crumbling concrete flooring. Dirty streams of light were pouring through gaps in the translucent ceiling, spotlighting aisles of low warped wooden tables. There were plenty of dead plants but also quite a few that had survived to grow rampant in the semi enclosed space. It was eerie but beautiful. Beth felt like she had been given the key to someone's secret garden.

Picking up a wide brimmed straw gardener's hat trimmed in bright pink ribbon she plopped it on her head and turned to pose for Daryl who was walking up the next aisle over. "What do you think?"

"You look like somebody's MeeMaw."

Beth laughed and made her way down the aisle, pink ribbon trailing behind her. "Oh Daryl," she breathed as she turned a corner. It was an entire floor to ceiling shelving unit of seed packets. Her eyes roved hungrily over the brightly colored packaging. Almost all of the edibles were missing but hardly anything else had been touched.

He came up behind her. "Yeah I thought you might like it."

"Like it!? It's amazing!" Beth started grabbing up seeds. Flowers, herbs, even stuff she knew wouldn't do all that well in the Georgia climate; she took it all shoving it into her backpack.

"At this rate you'll turn the whole damn prison into a garden," Daryl deadpanned.

"Oh that would be wonderful," Beth sighed a dreamy vision of the prison yard covered in flowers blooming up in her mind's eye.

Daryl scoffed and she turned to him amused. "Ain't so bad to dream every now and then," she teased, her cheeks glowing bright pink. He was standing behind her crossbow held in one hand, peering out from behind the hair trailing in his eyes. Impulsively she stepped forward and grabbed his hand. "Thank you for bringing me here." Daryl looked nervous as he met her gaze but he didn't pull his hand away and she found herself shuffling closer to him. "Really. Thank you."

He shrugged, looking at the floor. "Ain't nothing."

Gripping his hand tighter she gave it a soft squeeze. "You always say that."

"Cause it's true."

It never failed to astound Beth how little Daryl thought of himself. He was the one that kept them feed... kept them safe for the most part. She was absolutely sure they would have lost even more people by now if it weren't for him. "You do so much for everyone. You need to know that."

Daryl shrugged again and Beth found herself close enough that she had to tip up her chin to see his face. "You're a good man Daryl," she whispered.

He finally looked at her and her breath caught painfully in her throat. He was so close to her that she could see the little flecks of gold in his iris' and the few silver hairs that speckled his goatee. "It's just seeds," he muttered.

Earnestly she shook her head. "It's much more than that."

He leaned down, his breath ghosting across her cheek. Beth shivered, heat pooling in her center and spilling down her arms and legs in a rush of golden lava. Her heart was pounding so hard and loud that she was sure he would notice.

A loud crash shattered the moment and Beth let out a little scream as the seed wall swung forward and came tumbling down on them, two walkers flailing though the fragile plastic shelving. Daryl immediately pushed her behind him rising his crossbow and firing off a bolt at point blank rage right though one of the walkers temple's. That walker fell instantly and Beth scrambled to get out of the way of the other walker her boots crunching and sliding on seed packets and shards of plastic. She slipped and went down as the other walker lunged for her. Her arms came up defensively as her butt hit the ground hard the weight of the walker pressing her into the floor.

Bile rose up in her throat as its fingers grasped at her arms. She could hardly breath, her vision full of grey skin sliding off in chunks across the walkers neck and chest, it's lolling swollen tongue and yellow teeth snapping at her face. Fumbling she brought her knife up and and plunged it clumsily through the walker's cheek struggling to point it upwards as it flailed against her. She pressed and twisted the blade as it hard as she could hoping to hit the brain. The walker collapsed on top of her, a heap of bones and rotten muscle and Beth fell back all the way to the ground the walker's dead weight keeping her pinned to the ground as she struggled to catch her breath. Suddenly the walker's weight was pulled off of her and Daryl was crouched beside her panic in his eyes as he looked her over. "Ain't bit? Ain't scratched?"

Beth took a minute to her bearings and sat up shaking her head. "No I'm fine." Climbing to her feet she took stock of her body. She was definitely bruised but not broken. Her eyes drifted past the two dead walkers crumpled on the floor and she smiled a little. She had done it! Sure it had been a little sloppy and her tailbone would be seriously bruised but she had killed a walker. Daryl, standing beside her now, was still staring at her his face an unreadable mask. "Hey it's fine," she reassured. "I'm fine." She reached out for his hand but he backed away from her sending a pang of hurt through her heart.

"Best get back then," he grumbled as he turned and walked away. She sighed and grabbed her backpack following behind him.