Chapter 26 – "Forward"

Michonne wasn't surprised when Rick showed up at her door. Of course Captain Ford would tell him about her hearing for a restraining order against Negan. She was due to pick up Sydney from school in the next hour so they had time to talk. She walked back to the kitchen and Rick followed, closing the door behind him. She continued cooking dinner and when she couldn't take the silence anymore she stopped and turned to him. He was leaning against the kitchen counter arms folded across his chest.

"I'm fine."

"Did he hurt you?"

"Just pushed himself up against me on the wall. That's it."

Rick's face grew dark.

"I'm fine Rick."

She turned her back and continued cooking.

"He's done worse to me." She murmured.

Rick closed the gap between them and put his arms around her.

"I am sorry I can't protect you from him."

"I got a restraining order. It's a step forward. I should have done it years ago."

"Well it's done now and that's all that matters."

"Yes. It's enough for now but I know Negan. He's not going to stop. He'll find a way around it. It's what he does."

"Then maybe we should make our involvement known to him."

Michonne stopped what she was doing. Rick continued.

"I think it's a good idea, let Negan know that you are not alone, that you have someone in your corner."

"You really think that's a good idea? You and Negan already have history. You both hate each other and you want to tell him that we're together?"

Rick pulled away.

"You give Negan too much power."

"Are you serious?"

"Yes! You've been under his thumb for so long that now that you have a way to stick it to him and you wouldn't even take it!"

"I don't want to stick anything to anybody! It takes too much time and effort going back and forth arguing with someone. It's stressful! I just want to move on and live my life freely!

"It's like you like being under him! Do you like being his puppet?!"

Michonne took a step back from Rick. She couldn't believe that he would actually throw her situation back in her face.

"I don't want to be a secret anymore!"

"Wow! So this whole time you were thinking about yourself? You think this is ALLLLLL about you!"

"Michonne….I"

"I can't believe you threw Negan in my face. You think you're a secret?! You think I don't want to walk down the road with your hands around my waist and I'm feeding you ice cream and licking it from your lips? You think I don't want that?! Did it ever occur to you that the reason I don't want to come out about our relationship now is because I want it to be on our own terms and not Negan's? That I don't want him to dictate the pace of our relationship?"

Rick swallowed and stepped toward her but she held up her hand for him to stop.

"It's good to see what you really think about me and I'm glad you got your feelings off your chest."

"I didn't mean what I said Michonne."

"Yes you did. People tend to say what they truly think and feel when they are frustrated or angry but let me explain something to you Rick. Negan is a bastard. I know that but at the end of the day I will have to deal with him until Sydney is 18 years old and beyond that. He will always be in my life. I regret the day I met Negan! I hate him with every fiber in my soul. He took Daryl from you but he took my dignity, my sense of self worth and respect. So I want to get what you and I have right. I don't want to have regrets again Rick. I hope you can understand."

Michonne returned to cooking dinner and the silence in the kitchen was crushing.

"I'm frustrated that I can't do anything to easy your pain. I hate that Negan can just come up in here just like that and harass you."

Rick hugged her again.

"I'm sorry."

"I know."

She turned around and kissed him passionately.

"You awoke a strength in me I never knew I had and for that I will always love you for that. Thank you."

She kissed him again.

"We will not let Negan come between us."~*~*~*

Negan sat in his dark home office. The restraining order he received from the court was delivered half an hour ago and he was on his fourth glass of vodka. He was seething in rage and had no one to release it on. He tore the order in pieces.

He remembered the days during their marriage whenever he had a bad day he could come home and talk to her and she would be so patient and listen. She always knew what to say to soothe him and he missed that.

He took out a small photo album from his desk draw and slowly flipped through it. He stopped on a picture of Michonne in the hospital with minutes old Sydney in her arms. She was crying.

He turned to the next picture of a 2 month old Sydney sleeping in her crib. She was the most beautiful thing he had ever seen. The next picture was of Michonne nursing Sydney. She was 6 months old.

He calmly sifted through the other photos and slowly his rage subsided.~*~*~*

Shane smirked as he observed Negan through his hidden camera on his laptop. Negan's 'love' for Michonne will be his downfall. He saw when he tore up the restraining order, the several glasses of vodka that he gulped down viciously and his pathetic reminiscing through the album.

He also noticed that Negan became calm watching the photos. A calm Negan is no good for him. He reached for his phone, text a photo and watched the camera. The recipient checked his phone and flew into a violent rage.

"That's better puppet." He murmured.~*~*~*

Rosita cradled DJ tightly to her breast as she nursed him on the back patio. He was looking up at her with his bright grey greenish eyes, the eyes of his father. She pushed the hair out of his face. After DJ, they planned to have two more children, possibly three. They wanted DJ to have siblings.

Rick have been done more than enough by checking in on her almost daily, making sure that she has everything she needs. Food for her and the baby, pampers etc. Daryl's pension and gratuity paperwork have been stalled several times for minor issues that both her and Rick deem suspicious.

In the meantime, Rick made sure that the household bills are paid. She is eternally grateful to him and wished that she didn't have to depend on him so much. Soon DJ fell asleep and after she put him in his crib, she went into the kitchen and opened the bottom draw.

Slowly, she pulled out the notebook, the other half to what Daryl had already sent to Rick. She had it for three days now. She found it expertly tucked away in a black plastic bag under a loose tile in the washroom floor behind the washer and dryer. She didn't open it. She didn't want to know anything. She didn't want to see anything. She dialled Rick's number.~*~*~*

Rick spend some quality time with DJ, playing with him as Rosita finished up some household chores. When she was done she fixed some sandwiches and Rick came to the table with DJ cooing in his arm.

She sat quietly, looking at Rick as he ate. Halfway through his meal, she pushed the book towards him. He looked at her and reached for it but she didn't let it go. She maintained stern eye contact with him. She finally spoke.

"I found this book properly hidden and I want you to know that I didn't open it. I didn't read it. I don't want to know what's in it either. Whatever in this book got Daryl killed. Whatever in this book got me kidnapped from a public mall and whatever in this book could have cost me my son."

Rick looked down at the bundle in his arms and the baby was smiling up at him.

"This book is very dangerous Rick."

"I know and I promise that whatever I find will not come back you."

"Not just me Rick." She looked at her son. "On us."

She released her grip.~*~*~*

After visiting Rosita and baby D, Rick raced home. He had both Daryl and Michonne on his mind because they had the same problem….Negan. If he solved Daryl's case then he will also get Negan out of Michonne's life and probably for a long time as well.

He put both notebooks together, side by side and it still didn't make any sense to him as it was only different set of grouped numbers. Some of them he guessed could be dates but he wasn't sure and the only person who could solve it was Daryl's mystery informant.

He hasn't heard from her in weeks and despite his promise, he tried calling her phone a few times but it went straight to voicemail and he was tempted to leave one asking for her to call him to meet up.

Since the discovery of the pictures of bodies and other classified documents on the flash drive, Justin has been strangely and conveniently busy every time he called him since then. He knew as a civilian, it may have been the first time he has seen these things but he has to man up.

He took up the flash drive, his laptop and made the trek over to Justin's house.~*~*~*

Justin saw Rick coming over to his house only by pure accident. He was in the backyard working on his bike. He scampered to the tool shed close by and closed the door. Seconds later, there was knocking on his front door.

He prayed for Rick to go away. Suddenly, Rick appeared at the side of his house and was in direct line of sight of the tool shed. Justin held his breath, afraid to even think. Rick called out his name.

"Justin!"

Silence.

"Justin!"

Silence. Giving up, Rick returned to the front of the house and knocked on the front door again. A minute later he saw Rick walking down the driveway. He flopped down on the floor. Since that day, he couldn't get the images out of his head and he has been having some trouble sleeping. He needed some time to adjust before diving back into whatever Rick was working on.~*~*~*

Rick rushed out of the shower when he heard the cell phone ringing. He have been waiting on it to ring for so long that he thought that he was in a dream.

"Hello?!"

Silence

"Hello! It's me Rick!"

A breath exhaled on the other end.

"I know that you are there. Answer me! Please!"

The voice on the other end finally spoke.

"Do you still want to meet?"

"Yes!"

He shouted into the phone from excitement. He needed to take it down a notch.

"Yes…I would like to meet. Just tell me when and where."

"Stay by the phone. I'll text you an address."

"Ok."

"And Rick…come alone. If I suspect you have a tail you will never see me again."

"I promise…I'll be alone."~*~*~*

Rick looked at the phone for the umpteenth time. He has been driving around for almost two hours and it was the fifth address. He was growing weary but he will not give up. The agreement to meet was a positive step forward. Fifteen minutes later he pulled into the yard of an abandoned and overgrown gas station. He switched off his engine and waited.~*~*~*

She saw when the black sedan pulled into the gas station and a man came out. He was dressed in simple blue jeans and white shirt. His holster and gun was slung across his hip as he leaned against the trunk of the car. She looked at the picture in her hand.

She had done research on Rick Grimes and from all that she had found, he seemed like an honest cop but they always seemed so. She knows that he was asking questions into Daryl's death and it had rattled the cages of a few people. One person in particular. She was pleased~*~*~*

Rick reached into the back seat of the car and took out a flask. He drank from it and put it back. When he rose a woman, with her face covered was standing a few feet away from him with a gun pointing at him. He put his hands in the air.

"Step away from the car."

Rick did as he was told and put himself in plain sight for the woman's comfort.

"I'm not going to hurt you."

"Are you alone?"

"I've been driving around for hours. You know I am. You made sure of that."

The woman moved forward but still kept at a safe distance.

"Take off your gun and throw it over to me."

He compiled. She picked it up.

"Now take off your clothes."

Rick shrunk back.

"What?"

"I said to take off your clothes. You could be wearing a wire."

"I'm not!"

"I want to see that for myself!"

"I can assure you I'm not wearing a wire!"

"Ok. Let me make this as simple as possible. Either you take off your clothes or I walk. It's your decision and I don't have all day."

Slowly, Rick started shedding his clothes until he was in his underwear. The woman moved a little closer but not too close. She nodded at his underwear.

"Those too."

"Really?!"

She cocked her head at him. Rick took off his underwear and stood totally nude, his hand covering his front.

"Is this suitable for you?"

"Turn around."

Rick sigh loudly with displeasure."

"Now it is. Yes."

She pulled a nearby bucket, sat on it and motioned for Rick to sit down in the front passenger seat of the car. He did. She still held the gun on him. Rick nodded at it.

"Do you mind? I can't do anything to you in my current state."

"It's for my peace of mind."

Ok. Fair enough. What is your name?"

"Is that the most important thing you want to know Rick? My name?"

"No but it would be nice to call you by something."

"You will know my name in time but my name is not important. What I have to say is."

"Ok."

"I am ready to tell my story."~*~*~*