The NEST Rulebook (And Guidelines)

Hello Everyone! I'm Natasha and I'm the head A.I Technology Expert of NEST! (Networked Elements: Supporters and Transformers) Thanks to all the chaos and randomess that happens here Prowl decided that some Rules would be in order. And I've been put in charge of writing out said rules... Oh joy... I'm an A.I Technicion! Not a rulebook person!

Author's Note: Hey all! I've been reading all the fanmade rules on various stories and I decided to come up with my own! After all there are rules that need to be followed. (and or broken xP) Enjoy!

DISCLAIMER: Only writing this once. I do not own Transformers in any shape or kind. Natasha and some others are the only OCs I own.

NOTE: There will be Sparklings in this story but are unrelated to any in my other stories.

List of Autobot Sparklings:

Starburst (Optimus and Elita's daughter)
Blacklight (Ironhide and Chromia's daughter)
Avast (Ratchet and Moonracers son)
Charger (Roadbuster and Corona's daughter) *Corona is an OC I made up, she's a medic*
Razorwind, Airwave, and Skyfire (Windblade, Silverbolt and Air Raid's sons and daughter) *They are triplets*

List of Decepticon Sparklings:

Neberious (Megatron and DarkClaw's son) *another OC I made up*
Deathblade (Blackout and Fracture's daughter)
Nighthawk (Barricade and Swift's son)
Pandora and Paradox (Knockout and Breakdown's son and daughter) *Twins*

RULE 1: Do not call Ironhide any of the following names:

(IronAft)

(Short-Tempered)

(Old man)

(Ironman. He only lets Annabelle, Will Lennox, and me call him that)

(Psychotic weapon on wheels)

(Trigger-Happy Lunitic... Need I go on?)

RULE 2: Never let Wheeljack watch any of the following progams on TV:

(Mythbusters)

(Ben 10)

(Johnny Test)

(Outragus Acts of Science)

(And last but not least, the Disney Channel movie "Smart House")

(Last time we let him watch Mythbusters part of the base almost blew up...)

(You do not want to know what he was making)

RULE 3: Do not let the little Sparklings watch the TV show "Battlebots"

(I blame Crosshairs, Roadbuster, both sets of Twins, and Ironhide for this one)

(One day all of us were watching a Marathon of Battlebots and the little Sparklings wanted to watch it along with us.)

(It went great until Starburst started crying, turns out two of her favorite bots was Witchdoctor and Big Tento, AKA Tentomushi)

(Both bots got mauled up badly by Minotaur and Nightmare)

(There were robot guts everywhere and most of the Sparklings got scared, except for Blacklight and Charger, they loved it)

(Elita didn't like the fact that the Sparklings were watching something so violent and banned them and us from watching it)

(Sometimes we sneak to watch it when the Sparklings are asleep)

(Ain't no way in hell I'm missing my Robot Carnage!)

RULE 4: When creating A.I's, make sure you have control over them

(I have myself to blame for this one...)

(And Wheeljack)

(We were watching a Documentery about Dragons and Wheeljack commented that they looked like Predacons)

(When I asked him what Predacons were he told me all about them)

(Me being an A.I enginner I cooked up a plan to create my very own robot dragons)

(Wheeljack helped me and within a month, Shadowbolt and Darklight were born!)

(Everyone on base had mixed reactions to our homemade Predacons, but overall they were very obediant)

(Until the main storage shed was blown up by the two, and they started acting like wild animals)

(Turns out Wheeljack failed to tell me that he found two small shards of the Allspark and incorperated its power into the little dragon drones)

(So... we now have two real Predacons on base...)

(And even though they're small, like the size of a helicopter, they cause a lot of damage!)

(Luckliy for me, the Dinobots took them in as their own)

(Who knew two Predacons could cause so much destruction?)

RULE 5: Do not give Annabelle or the Sparklings sweets without parental consent

(Skids and Mudflap wanted to share the stash of sweet energon cookies they had with the Sparklings)

(Since Annabelle couldn't eat Energon they gave her regular cookies)

(The base was full of happy, hyper, sugar filled kids)

(Some were literally bouncing off the walls! 0.o)

(Charger was running around screaming like a banshee and hitting people with her bat)

(And poor Skyfire ate too much sweets that she threw up on Prowl's foot-ped)

(The parents wern't happy and Ratchet confiscated the sweets)

(They are now on cleaning duty for the next month)

RULE 6: No fast food on Base

(*grumbles* I blame Ratchet for this...)

(One time I brought in McDonald's and Taco Bell for the solders since they haven't had it in a while)

(All of us were happily munching away at our greasy delisious foodstuffs until Ratchet saw us)

(He went on a rant on how those kinds of foods are bad for you and all that jazz)

(He then took all of our food and threw it in the trash!)

(When he gave us a list of more healither foods to eat needless to say we were pissed)

(I'm currently plotting a revenge prank)

(No one takes away my Hashbrowns and Queserito and gets away with it!)

RULE 7: Slenderman, FNAF, and any other scary game is not to be used in pranks

(Sideswipe and Sunstreaker decided to play a scary prank on everyone, and somehow got me, Sam, and Leo to go along with it)

(The prank was to scare passerbys with Holoforms of either Slenderman, the animatronics from Five Nights At Freddy's, and any other scary game they could think off.)

(Sam and Leo were in charge of leading the victims- I mean unsupecting people through a hallway straight to them)

(I was in charge of recording everything)

(Once the Lambo Twins got everything set up we waited until it was nighttime.)

(In over 5 minutes we scared the living slag out of various solders that passed through)

(Even Red Alert screamed like a girl and ran in the opposite direction)

(Suddenly Sam got bold and decided to lead Ironhide down the hallway, where the twins Holoforms jumped out and scared him)

(I was trying my best not to laugh at his face)

(What I didn't account for was the onlining of his cannons and chasing the twins and the boys throughout the base)

(My laughter was drowned out by their screams of terror)

(I still have the recorded video of that)

RULE 8: Pokemon GO is banned from base

(Are you kidding me?! That is my favorite thing to play and you ban it Prowl!?)

(Well there is a vaild reason for that...)

(Apparently most of the solders got distracted when playing the game and ended up accidently bumping into things or walking around looking like zombies)

(But that's not the reason it was banned)

(During a surprise attack from some rouge Decepticons 4 of the solders were playing Pokemon GO and saw a rare Pokemon sitting on one of the Decepticons)

(Not even paying attention they stood by it and tried to capture it)

(The Con was very confused as to why humans were just standing near it)

(It was distracted enough that the Wreakers tackled it down and snuffed out its spark)

(Prowl didn't like how those solders and practicily everyone else is getting distracted by the game so he banned it)

(And the Pokemon the 4 solders captured was a Shiny Mewtwo)

(Dammit! I want that Pokemon!)

RULE 9: Parents are always protective of their kids

(Well, this isn't a rule. More like a statement)

(It's a known fact that all parents, no matter what species will protect their young from danger)

(And insults are one of them...)

(Galloway made a callous remark about Starburst and the rest of the Sparklings)

(I will not repeat the words he said)

(But he did call them stupid mindless robots that are just a waste of space)

(All of the Sparklings started crying and Charger called him a meanie bully)

(The parents were upset...)

(It took all of Optimus's willpower to not only hold the angry parents back but to prevent himself from squishing Galloway under his foot)

(There's a No Tolorance For Bullying policy at NEST and I was pissed off he said such a thing)

(So I did the right thing and beat his ass)

(Some of the solders had to pry me off of him)

(I gave him a black eye)

(And maybe broke a rib or two)

(The Autobots filed a complant and he's now on paid leave until further notice)

(Good riddance...)

(I think he's scared of me now... hehehe...)

RULE 10: Always show up for your Doctor's Appontiment

(I had a check-up today by Ratchet but I was so busy training the new Techies that I forgot)

(When I arrived at the Med Bay 3 hours later he wasn't happy)

(I tried explaining to him that I lost track of time but he wouldn't listen)

(Long story short, always show up for Ratchet's appointments)

(He's scary when angry... OnO; )

RULE 11: Always knock before entering someone's room

(I had to ask Wheeljack something so I went in his room)

(Only to quickly run out once I realized what he was doing)

(My poor innocent eyes!)

RULE 12: Don't bother Drift when he's watching his Soaps

(Why is this a Rule? Well I'll tell you)

(When he arrived to base I told Drift about the Japanese culture and he fell in love with it, mainly it's soap operas)

(I couldn't care less for the soaps but he loves them)

(There is one Soap he got me hooked on and it's called "Sailor Suit and Machine Gun")

(It is badass!)

(Anyway we was in the rec room when Bluestreak and Smokescream came in arguing about something)

(They got so loud that Drift couldn't hear his show so he threw his Shurikens at them and told them to shut up)

(I have never seen any bot backpedal out of a room so fast in my life)

(Lesson of the day: Never interrupt Drift and his Soaps)

RULE 13: No bad language around the Sparklings

(The Sparklings were playing a giant version of Jenga that Wheeljack made when the tower fell)

(When it did Charger said ''Slaggit all to the fragging Pit!'')

(Everyone stopped what they were doing and looked at her in shock)

(Roadbuster thought it was funny and started laughing)

(His mate didn't think so and smacked him upside the head)

(When asked where she heard that from she told us that her daddy and "Iwonhide" said it a lot when they got angry)

(Corona grabbed some Cleanser and poured it down said Mech's throats)

(It was funny seeing them gag and burp up bubbles)

RULE 14: The Following Movies are Banned

(The Ring 1 and 2)

(Red Alert shot up every TV and Computer Monitor after watching that)

(We had to replace them all)

(Texas Chainsaw Massicare)

(It was too gory and most of the bots were frightened of it)

(Prowl glitched out and just laid there)

(Finding Nemo)

(I had a pet Goldfish and the Twins flushed it down the toliet since they thought it was lost)

(It was a freshwater fish!)

(Jerks...)

(The Matrix)

(It disturbed Red Alert that anyone can hack into anything and he went on full panic mode)

(It didn't help that each time he saw one of us talking on our cellphones he thought we were communicating with the Matrix people as he called them)

(Toy Story 1 though 3)

(The bots were vary of any kind of toy lying around base)

(Some of Annabelle's dolls went missing afterwards)

(Along with most of the Sparkling's toys)

(I had to hide my Pikachu doll from them)

(Pika Pika...)

(The Legend of Tarzan)

(Hound wanted to find the Man-Ape and searched all over Diego Garcia's Forest for him)

(I told him that he was just a made-up charater and wouldn't be living in the forest)

(Or any forest for that matter)

(Hound is still determined to find him)

(The Secret Life of Pets)

(I never seen the movie and I think it's cute)

(Wheeljack though started following Sam's dogs Mojo and Frankie)

(He wanted to see if they could talk)

(Plus Ironhide, Sunstreaker, Topspin, and Crosshairs don't like animals and they hated the movie)

(Ironhide wanted to squish the dogs if they even started talking to him)

(Okay, I honestly don't know why this is banned)

(It's just a kids movie for Christ's sake!)

(Nerve)

(Seeing all the dares the people made in the movie got some bots *IE: Both sets of Twins, Jolt, Jazz, and surprisingly Arcee* into creating their own version of Nerve)

(Even some of the human solders got in on the action)

(But the dares were getting not only rediculous but dangerous as well)

(Will was dared by Epps to stick a flag on top of Grimlock's head without him noticing for $400)

(In his underwear)

(And he had to do it within 10 minutes)

(So he stripped down, climbed up on a roof and waited for the big Dinobot to show up)

(When said Dinobot arrived Will ran as fast as he could, jumped on top of his head and stuck a huge white flag on him)

(Everyone cheered and watched as he climbed down and ran to us)

(I still can't believe he did that!)

(Poor Grimlock still doesn't know that he has a flag on his head)

(Although he keeps saying that everyone grins at him when they see them)

(He'll figure it out)

RULE 14: DO NOT UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WAKE ME UP WHEN I'M NAPPING!

(I was so tired from working and dealing with crap that I fell asleep in my bed)

(I haven't been getting any sleep since I've been so busy with things)

(Not even a hour later I hear a loud bullhorn next to my ears waking me up)

(I jumped like 20 feet off my bed!)

(The Lamborghini Twins were snickering at me)

(Big Mistake...)

(They saw how pissed off I was so I grabbed a special gun I invented and aimed it at them)

(It was a Paint Remover gun)

(They saw it and tried begging for forgiveness)

(I showed them no mercy)

(The Autobots were wondering where all the screams were coming from and they saw the Twins run past them as bits of paint melted off their frames)

(Optimus shook his helm at us)

(Long story short, NEVER wake me up from a well deserved nap)

(I'm like a cranky Tiger when I'm disturbed)

RULE 15: No using various qoutes from TV and or Movies (No matter how funny they are)

"SHUN THE NON-BELIEVER! SSSSHHHHHUUUUNNNN!" (Me, Jazz, Wheeljack, Bumblebee, both sets of Twins)

"But waiting hurts my soul..." (Me, Sam, Leo, Bumblebee, and others)

"Shorty? COULD A SHORTY DO THIS?! WHAT ELSE ARE YOU GONNA CALL ME!? A HALF-PINT BEAN SPROUT MIDGET?!" (Jazz when he threw Smokescream for calling him short)

"What's that? I think it's the sound of no one caring." (Ratchet, Chromia, Crosshairs, Roadbuster)

"FISHPASTE!" (it was so cute when Moonracer said this!)

(She was drawing something and broke her favorite pen)

(Arcee had a WTF look on her face when she said it)

"A child? If I'm a child then you know what that makes you? A Pedophile, and I'll be damned if I just sit here and get lectured by a pervert!" (I said this to Mearing one time after she called me a child, the look on her face was priceless!)

"Yes Satan? Oh I'm sorry I thought you were someone else." (Sideswipe said this to Prowl once and got smacked in the helm)

"MY PAINTJOB! CURSE YOU DINKELBURG!" (Lambo Twins)

"Is it illegal to preform an Autopsy on a living person?" (Ratchet, Red Alert, First Aid)

"Everything sucks, might as well find something to smile about." (Ultra Magnus, Ratchet)

"Sometimes... The bigger they are the harder they kick your ass." (Sam, Will, Epps, and certain others)

"I think my penis stopped breathing, do you know CPR?" (Kup said this to Corona's twin sister Aurora and got bitch-slapped, was funny to see though)

"Madness? THIS IS SPARTA!" (Almost all the younger bots on base)

"YOU SHALL NOT PASS!" (Me and Sam yelled this at the next random person we saw and blocked them from the Rec Room)

(got weird stares that day)

"I have had it with this motherfragging snakes on this motherfragging plane!" (Ironhide said this after one of the solders poured rubber toy snakes on him

(He was also on a plane and didn't like it)

"You may take my life, but you will never take my freedom!" (Sideswipe and Sunstreaker yelled this to Prowl after he locked them up in the Brig)

"Nobody move! I dropped me brain!" (Spent 5 hours in the Medbay for brain scans... worth it)

"WILMA!" (Sam was banging on the bathroom door after I beat him to it

(He got odd stares from the Autobots)

"Giggity!" (Leo blurted this out and got all the solders laughing)

(Prowl and Ultra Magnus didn't get it)

"I would've gotten away with it had it not been for you Meddling kids!" (Me, Wheeljack, both sets of twins, Bumblebee, Bluestreak and Smokescreen)

"Oh my God! They killed Kenny!" "You Bastards!" (Chevy Twins said this when they saw a solder lying on the ground)

(his name was Kenny and he was only resting)

(Got him to laugh though)

"Kiss my shiny metal aft!" (the younger bots say this alot when lazy and don't wanna work)

"Some people are like Slinkies, not really good for much but they bring a smile to your face when you push them down the stairs." (Crosshairs, Wreakers, Chromia and Aurora)

"Silence is golden, but Duct Tape is silver." (Me after using said tape to shut the Chevy twins up)

"WE'RE BLASTING OFF AGAIN!" (Me and Wheeljack say this when one of our inventions don't go right, everyone knows to leave the area if we say it)

(I'd list more, but it's taking up most of the page)

(Plus Prowl is glaring at me)

(He's still upset about that one prank I did)

(I'd go into details but he's still glaring)

(Natasha out!)

AN: Yea I jumped on the Rule Bandwagon. Like it? Hate it? Thinking WTF is this I'm reading? Let me know in Reviews! And if you have a suggestion feel free to leave it and I'll put it in the next chapter.

NOTE: Oh btw, since I'm still busy with my other stories this one won't be updated regularly. But it will be updated. :D