SQ SUMMER WEEK 2016 – DAY 3 : Insecurities.

When two people love each other as much as Regina Mills and Emma Swan did, when they are together and having a son, living perfectly happily, the next logical step would be to get married. To unit their souls in front of god. To seal their love with a beautiful (and maybe a bit expensive) ring. Marriage was such a big deal for the both of them but wasn't it just what made it even more magical ? To take that next step together ?

Yes, after spending a lifetime dancing around each other and two years of happiness with the woman she loved, Emma really wanted to get married. For so many reasons she couldn't even count them, the most important one being how much she loved her girlfriend.

Their story was probably so unique and so special that it could be written as a novel or be a script for the next movie of a great producer. They met when they were in college and even though everything and every odds separated them since then, they made it and they couldn't be prouder of it.

Regina Mills was Cora Mills daughter. As such, she was only allowed to speak and hang out with a certain type of people. The « certain type of people », of course, was the richer kids at school and those who were well educated and smart. She was not allowed to waste her time talking to people beneath her. But since she was also Regina Mills, she couldn't care less about what her mother said. On the contrary, she used every occasions she had to spend time talking with the poorest student she knew. Her mother couldn't even argue against that because helping them study was good for her image. First, she appeared as smarter than them and of course, it made her look nice and socially great, kind of like she was their savior. She was also someone who loved very deeply and fiercely. She loved sciences and music, took pride in having a great fashion sense. One day, she hoped to become a great surgeon and to finally make her mother proud.

Emma Swan on the other hand, was basically her opposite. After her junky of a mother abandoned her, she grew up in the system without the luck of knowing what a real family meant. She went from one foster family to another until she was 15years old. Then she found a bit of happiness when she finally met two people who really cared about her and wanted the best for her. She was able to go to college and try to become the woman she always wanted to be. Her favorite thing to do to past time was probably reading. She also liked to write, but her lack of confidence made showing anyone her work impossible. She never cared about what everyone else thought or the way they looked at her when she came at school with another leather jacket.

They met during their first college year when after she failed her exams the great Regina Mills came to her with a proposition. She offered to be her tutor freely for the rest of the year. The only payment she asked in exchange was that she voted for her as the new student council president. She made the best decision of her life when she agreed.

During the year, they learned to know each other and grow closer and closer. It took a lot of time for them to finally realized that what they felt was way stronger than friendship. It also took them betrayal, jalousie, anger, hurt, pride, lust... But it was behind them now. When they decided to give their relationship a second chance two years ago, they also decided to put the past behind them and only focus on their future together.

But if Emma learned something from all those struggling years, it was that life and happiness didn't last enough to waste any time. A few weeks ago, she accidentally had found a picture of a beautiful wedding dress. Since then, she had been obsessed with seeing Regina in it. Seeing Regina in no matter which wedding dress. Obsessed with getting married with Regina. She wanted to propose so badly but she was scared. Regina had a high standard and she always had this crazy fear of not being enough for her. When she opened up to her girlfriend about it, the latest always found the words to reassure her and find the words to appease her. Now that she wanted to propose though, she was scared as hell.

She had to calm down if she didn't want Regina to understand what was happening, but it was as if she couldn't help it. Since all this mess started, she made a habit of buying flowers every week for the woman she loved. She worked extra hours to spoil Regina with new clothes and even learned how to cook better meals. It helped... at first. Now that the time to start planning the perfect proposal came though, she couldn't think about anything else. Just this morning, she was so preoccupied that even she put her shirt on in the wrong way.

She let Henry in into her little secret. Their 8 years old smart and dreamy son was probably the biggest fan of their love story and was honored to be a part of such an important mission. He even came up himself with the perfect plan and did his best to think about every details. Each one of them somehow related to their history.

Today was the d-day. They had a table ready in the best restaurant of the town, Henry was sleeping at their friend's place (Mary Margaret probably was a bit naive but she was a great parent, they were glad that they could count on her.) and all Emma had to do was not mess up.

But of course, she was Emma Swan.

She was so scared that in took her an extra hour to find something suitable to wear, which lead to her being late and Regina being amused as much as a bit annoyed. When they arrived in the restaurant and her girlfriend excused herself to go to the bathroom for a while she almost turned her whole bag upside down fearing that she forgot the ring. Until she found it. In her jacket. She would have loved that her clumsy self got together after that, but she didn't. In the middle of their dinner, she almost knocked her glass down, that's when she realized how hot she was feeling. Immediately she went to the bathroom to refresh herself. God she had to get it together.

But she couldn't. She almost threw up. She was shaking

Why on earth did she ever thought this was a good idea ? Her girlfriend was Regina mills and she was... well, her. Clumsy. Poor. Grumpy. Dorky... and she had a poor fashion sense. Even though she knew Regina wasn't the type to reject her because of this.

Was it too late to back out of it ? Probably not... Maybe...

Oh for god's sake Swan! Get the hell back there and propose to the woman you love she thought. (pensées à mettre en italique pour les détacher du reste du texte)

She went back to her table, still feeling a little weak in the knees. They enjoyed the rest of their dinner together without major trouble, conversation flew easily between them as always.

Then the dessert came.

Emma sucked in a breath. Now was the time.

Regina probably noticed that something had changed in her because she asked her if everything was alright. But she couldn't hear her or even answer her properly. Her anxiety was skyrocketting.

But she had to do this.

So she gattered her courage, took the ring from her jacket and got on one knee in front of her hopefully soon-to-be fiancée.

She had a speech ready. Did she even remember it ? Oh, yes, she did.

" Regina. It took us... years, heartbreak, lust, hope, love, anger, sadness, happiness and so much more to get where we are now. And i couldn't be happier. Our beautiful family is the best thing that ever happened to me and i know... i'm... probably not the best person to take care of both of you, but all i want is the chance to try. We're so different but so alike at the same time. And i love that about us. I love us. I love you Regina Mills, all i want is to make you happy and to spend the rest of my life with you. So tonight i want to ask you... Regina Mills... god this is not easy. Regina Mills would you make me the honor of becoming my wife ? "

God that was not easy.

It took her girlfriend a few second to react, she was speechless. Tears formed in her eyes and a shaky hand went to touch Emma's face.

" Yes you adorable idiot i will marry you ! " She answered before throwing her arms around her neck and kissing her passionately.

When the need for air couldn't be ignored any longer, they broke the kiss, leaning their forehead against each other.

" i don't ever want you to think you're not enough for me, for us, anymore Emma. We are not perfect, i know we are not, but you are the one i chose. The one i will always choose from this day until i die. If i have to, i will gladly spend the rest of my days reminding you of that. "

Emma sighed. Once again, everything ended up well and her fiancée found the words to appease her. She would have to work on her anxiety issues and insecurities eventually. But tonight, she had an engagement to celebrate. Her own. To the woman she loved.