A/N: This last chapter is really just to type up some loose ends. It's really just some fluff including sad Merlin, protective Gwaine, and oblivious Arthur.
Merlin hears a knock on his door, and he spins around, starting to say "come in!" only to find Gwaine already in the room with a grin on his face.
"Hello," Merlin greets him.
"Hi," Gwaine returns. "I wanted to ask you something. About what you said when you were… you know…" he makes a gesture around his waist. "Small."
"Right," Merlin laughs. "Ask anything you want."
"Well, you said something about a girl named Freya? And… Arthur killing her?"
Merlin's face hardens. "Anything except that."
Gwaine takes on a pleading expression. "Merlin, please. You lied to me for years- Okay, didn't tell me for years that you could do magic," he modifies upon seeing the warlock's expression. "The point is… I thought you trusted me. I told you everything. I told you I was a bloody noble, Merlin! What, you thought if you told me I would just send you straight to the pyre? You had to have known I wouldn't. But you didn't know, and that hurt. I mean, I get why you wouldn't tell Arthur, since he's the king and all and technically the one enforcing the whole anti-magic law, but… me?"
"I'm sorry. You have to understand how hard it is when your life is on the line, and before you say you wouldn't have told anyone, I know. It's just… you're a knight of Camelot. A knight to Arthur, and that means you would have to betray him if you were to remain loyal to me. And honestly, I know you would have. I know you would have lied to him through your teeth before revealing my secret. That's why I didn't tell you. I didn't want to put you in that position," Merlin admits.
"And besides that, it's a little difficult to tell people this secret that I was told constantly as a child would get me killed. I never even told anyone back in Ealdor. The only person besides my mother that knew was Will," Merlin swallows, "and I didn't even tell him. He just found out one day when I got angry and accidentally made a drawer open from across the room. That's why I left Ealdor, because my mom discovered that Will knew about my magic and sent me away to make sure I was safe and he wouldn't tell."
Gwaine snorts. "Bloody ironic, sending you of Camelot of all places."
"Tell me about it," Merlin agrees with a grin. "But she thought Gaius would be able to teach me how to control my magic better."
"Back to Freya," Gwaine starts, "since you didn't tell me about your magic, I feel entitled to an admission. Just between friends," he adds, stressing the last word.
Merlin swallows. "It's not an issue of trust that keeps me from telling you. It's just because I don't want to talk about it. I can't. It hurts too much to remember."
"That's what friends are for," Gwaine tells him softly. "To carry the weight with you and to try our hardest to help with the pain."
The warlock closes his eyes. "Fine," he agrees after a moment. "I'll tell you. A couple of years ago, I happened to meet a girl. She was trapped by a bounty hunter, and I used my magic to let her out of the cage. I did it because she looked so terrified and harmless and I didn't want her to die, and… it so easily could have been me in that cage, scared and alone and about to die for the crime of existing. So I let her out, and I tried to help her after that."
"Was she a druid?" Gwaine asks quietly.
Merlin considers. "In a way. But that wasn't why she was in the cage. It was something more than that. I tried to give her food with magic, told her she could have anything she wanted. She asked for strawberries. I tried my hardest to make some for her, but I ended up with a red flower. She said it wasn't a strawberry, and I said it was the right color and gave it to her anyway. Since I couldn't make her food with magic, I began bringing her breakfast from Arthur's plate." Merlin smiles at the memory.
"I tried so hard to keep her safe and happy; I even stole a dress from Morgana for her. She wore this thing that was little more than a rag, and I couldn't stand to see her in it. So I gave her the dress. It was fit for a princess, and that's why she refused to wear it. She didn't think she was worthy of it. She kept telling me that she was dangerous, that I should just leave her. But I couldn't. I… I loved her."
"Why did she say she was dangerous?" Gwaine asks gently.
"Because she was," Merlin whispers. "She was cursed. She turned into this monster at night that couldn't help but kill."
"How had she been cursed?"
"A man attacked her. She tried to fight him, and ended up accidentally killing him out of self defense. She didn't mean to. She was so gentle, she would never have hurt anyone intentionally. But the man's mother was a sorceress, and she was angry. So she cursed Freya to kill forever more."
"That's why she was in the cage," Gwaine breaths.
Merlin nods sadly. "Yes. And that's why- remember when I said she was a druid in a way? She had been one, but when she was cursed the other druids cast her out. When I found out about this, I told her we would leave together. We would go somewhere where there was no one else, where she wouldn't be able to hurt anyone. We were gonna live by a lake. A beautiful lake. She said no at first, told me she couldn't make me leave my life in Camelot behind for her, but she agreed eventually."
"You would have left Arthur to be with her?" Gwaine asks in shock. It's hard for him to fathom someone being important enough to Merlin that he would abandon the king.
"Yeah," Merlin says softly. "Yeah, I would have."
"What went wrong?" Gwaine persists.
Merlin looks away. "That night, before we met up to leave, she tried to go without me. She loved me too much to let me destroy everything I had for her. So she ran. And Arthur found her. He and the knights cornered her… she tried to escape but it was too late. She started to transform into the monster she was cursed to be, and Arthur… Arthur stabbed her. I used my magic to create a distraction. I think I blew some of the knights away. I don't really remember. I just remember taking her to the tunnel. Even as a monster, she couldn't hurt me. She ran. I found her farther down in the tunnel, injured and crying but human."
"You don't have to tell me," Gwaine says. He knows where this will inevitably lead, and he doesn't want to hurt his friend by making him say it.
"Yes, I do," Merlin chokes out. "I carried her through the woods to a lake, a lake where we might have lived if-" he breaks off, shaking his head. "If. She smiled up at me and said, 'you remembered,' and I told her of course I did. I said I was sorry for what the sorceress did to her, and I begged for a way to save her. She told me I already had saved her by making her feel loved. I told her not to go, and she promised that she would repay me one day. Then she died in my arms. I burned her body in the lake." Merlin's voice is hollow despite the tears running down his face.
"Merlin, I am so-"
"Don't," Merlin cuts him off, voice breaking. "Just… don't."
Gwaine nods. He tries to speak, but finds there's nothing to say. Instead, he hugs his best friend.
Merlin tenses in his arms for a moment, but soon relaxes. After a moment, Gwaine hears a quiet sob on his shoulder.
"It's okay," he says simply, and Merlin breaks down. They somehow end up on the floor, but Gwaine doesn't pull away.
"I miss her," he chokes out.
"I know," Gwaine says.
At that moment, there's a knock on the door, and Arthur walks in before either man can say anything.
"Merlin, where the hell-" he breaks off upon seeing his two friends on the floor, holding each other and crying. "What's going on here?"
Gwaine's face darkens as he releases Merlin and stalks over to the man who killed his best friend's lover. "You, Princess, have some things to answer for."
Arthur narrows his eyes at the threat in the knight's face. "What are you-"
"Stop," Merlin says in a voice that is small and quiet but somehow powerful. "It's not worth it."
"How can you say that?" Gwaine asks.
"He didn't know," Merlin says simply.
"What didn't I know?" Arthur cuts in, tone slightly softer upon seeing Merlin's tear stained face.
"That you ki-"
"Gwaine!" Merlin snaps. The knight meets his gaze, and Merlin shakes his head. "Leave it."
Gwaine closes his eyes before nodding in agreement. He turns back to Arthur. "You're damn lucky that Merlin is the most forgiving person in the world. Because if I had it my way, I'd have already started punching," he growls before leaving the room, making sure to bump into Arthur's shoulder on the way out.
Arthur frowns. "Is there something I should know?"
Merlin smiles. "No. Nothing at all."
"Are you sure? Because Gwaine seems to think I've done something."
"As it turns out, the only crime you're guilty of is being a complete and utter prat," Merlin informs Arthur.
"At least I'm not an idiot who wears ridiculous scarves all the time!"
Merlin yelps indignantly. "I happen to like my scarves!"
"You're the only one who does," Arthur snorts.
"Why, my king, I never realized fashion was so important to you!" Merlin gasps in mock surprise.
As Arthur sputters indignantly and eventually just tells Merlin to shut up, the warlock grins. Because unbeknownst to Arthur, he's been, for the first time, completely forgiven.
Merlin still misses Freya, of course. But he's learned how to live without her, and he thinks she'd be proud of him.
When Arthur eventually leaves the room, he goes to his bed and picks up the flower he'd given Freya. He'd enchanted it to stay forever fresh, and he smiles down at it now. "Hey, Freya," he says softly to it, "I know how to make strawberries now. I think you'd like them."
Notes: Okay, so I realize the ending wasn't the best, but it seemed right to me. Thanks for reading, and I hope you enjoyed!
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rockmyskittles, parisbaguette, FabriziaTheFallenHunter
Merlin hears a knock on his door, and he spins around, starting to say "come in!" only to find Gwaine already in the room with a grin on his face.
"Hello," Merlin greets him.
"Hi," Gwaine returns. "I wanted to ask you something. About what you said when you were… you know…" he makes a gesture around his waist. "Small."
"Right," Merlin laughs. "Ask anything you want."
"Well, you said something about a girl named Freya? And… Arthur killing her?"
Merlin's face hardens. "Anything except that."
Gwaine takes on a pleading expression. "Merlin, please. You lied to me for years- Okay, didn't tell me for years that you could do magic," he modifies upon seeing the warlock's expression. "The point is… I thought you trusted me. I told you everything. I told you I was a bloody noble, Merlin! What, you thought if you told me I would just send you straight to the pyre? You had to have known I wouldn't. But you didn't know, and that hurt. I mean, I get why you wouldn't tell Arthur, since he's the king and all and technically the one enforcing the whole anti-magic law, but… me?"
"I'm sorry. You have to understand how hard it is when your life is on the line, and before you say you wouldn't have told anyone, I know. It's just… you're a knight of Camelot. A knight to Arthur, and that means you would have to betray him if you were to remain loyal to me. And honestly, I know you would have. I know you would have lied to him through your teeth before revealing my secret. That's why I didn't tell you. I didn't want to put you in that position," Merlin admits.
"And besides that, it's a little difficult to tell people this secret that I was told constantly as a child would get me killed. I never even told anyone back in Ealdor. The only person besides my mother that knew was Will," Merlin swallows, "and I didn't even tell him. He just found out one day when I got angry and accidentally made a drawer open from across the room. That's why I left Ealdor, because my mom discovered that Will knew about my magic and sent me away to make sure I was safe and he wouldn't tell."
Gwaine snorts. "Bloody ironic, sending you of Camelot of all places."
"Tell me about it," Merlin agrees with a grin. "But she thought Gaius would be able to teach me how to control my magic better."
"Back to Freya," Gwaine starts, "since you didn't tell me about your magic, I feel entitled to an admission. Just between friends," he adds, stressing the last word.
Merlin swallows. "It's not an issue of trust that keeps me from telling you. It's just because I don't want to talk about it. I can't. It hurts too much to remember."
"That's what friends are for," Gwaine tells him softly. "To carry the weight with you and to try our hardest to help with the pain."
The warlock closes his eyes. "Fine," he agrees after a moment. "I'll tell you. A couple of years ago, I happened to meet a girl. She was trapped by a bounty hunter, and I used my magic to let her out of the cage. I did it because she looked so terrified and harmless and I didn't want her to die, and… it so easily could have been me in that cage, scared and alone and about to die for the crime of existing. So I let her out, and I tried to help her after that."
"Was she a druid?" Gwaine asks quietly.
Merlin considers. "In a way. But that wasn't why she was in the cage. It was something more than that. I tried to give her food with magic, told her she could have anything she wanted. She asked for strawberries. I tried my hardest to make some for her, but I ended up with a red flower. She said it wasn't a strawberry, and I said it was the right color and gave it to her anyway. Since I couldn't make her food with magic, I began bringing her breakfast from Arthur's plate." Merlin smiles at the memory.
"I tried so hard to keep her safe and happy; I even stole a dress from Morgana for her. She wore this thing that was little more than a rag, and I couldn't stand to see her in it. So I gave her the dress. It was fit for a princess, and that's why she refused to wear it. She didn't think she was worthy of it. She kept telling me that she was dangerous, that I should just leave her. But I couldn't. I… I loved her."
"Why did she say she was dangerous?" Gwaine asks gently.
"Because she was," Merlin whispers. "She was cursed. She turned into this monster at night that couldn't help but kill."
"How had she been cursed?"
"A man attacked her. She tried to fight him, and ended up accidentally killing him out of self defense. She didn't mean to. She was so gentle, she would never have hurt anyone intentionally. But the man's mother was a sorceress, and she was angry. So she cursed Freya to kill forever more."
"That's why she was in the cage," Gwaine breaths.
Merlin nods sadly. "Yes. And that's why- remember when I said she was a druid in a way? She had been one, but when she was cursed the other druids cast her out. When I found out about this, I told her we would leave together. We would go somewhere where there was no one else, where she wouldn't be able to hurt anyone. We were gonna live by a lake. A beautiful lake. She said no at first, told me she couldn't make me leave my life in Camelot behind for her, but she agreed eventually."
"You would have left Arthur to be with her?" Gwaine asks in shock. It's hard for him to fathom someone being important enough to Merlin that he would abandon the king.
"Yeah," Merlin says softly. "Yeah, I would have."
"What went wrong?" Gwaine persists.
Merlin looks away. "That night, before we met up to leave, she tried to go without me. She loved me too much to let me destroy everything I had for her. So she ran. And Arthur found her. He and the knights cornered her… she tried to escape but it was too late. She started to transform into the monster she was cursed to be, and Arthur… Arthur stabbed her. I used my magic to create a distraction. I think I blew some of the knights away. I don't really remember. I just remember taking her to the tunnel. Even as a monster, she couldn't hurt me. She ran. I found her farther down in the tunnel, injured and crying but human."
"You don't have to tell me," Gwaine says. He knows where this will inevitably lead, and he doesn't want to hurt his friend by making him say it.
"Yes, I do," Merlin chokes out. "I carried her through the woods to a lake, a lake where we might have lived if-" he breaks off, shaking his head. "If. She smiled up at me and said, 'you remembered,' and I told her of course I did. I said I was sorry for what the sorceress did to her, and I begged for a way to save her. She told me I already had saved her by making her feel loved. I told her not to go, and she promised that she would repay me one day. Then she died in my arms. I burned her body in the lake." Merlin's voice is hollow despite the tears running down his face.
"Merlin, I am so-"
"Don't," Merlin cuts him off, voice breaking. "Just… don't."
Gwaine nods. He tries to speak, but finds there's nothing to say. Instead, he hugs his best friend.
Merlin tenses in his arms for a moment, but soon relaxes. After a moment, Gwaine hears a quiet sob on his shoulder.
"It's okay," he says simply, and Merlin breaks down. They somehow end up on the floor, but Gwaine doesn't pull away.
"I miss her," he chokes out.
"I know," Gwaine says.
At that moment, there's a knock on the door, and Arthur walks in before either man can say anything.
"Merlin, where the hell-" he breaks off upon seeing his two friends on the floor, holding each other and crying. "What's going on here?"
Gwaine's face darkens as he releases Merlin and stalks over to the man who killed his best friend's lover. "You, Princess, have some things to answer for."
Arthur narrows his eyes at the threat in the knight's face. "What are you-"
"Stop," Merlin says in a voice that is small and quiet but somehow powerful. "It's not worth it."
"How can you say that?" Gwaine asks.
"He didn't know," Merlin says simply.
"What didn't I know?" Arthur cuts in, tone slightly softer upon seeing Merlin's tear stained face.
"That you ki-"
"Gwaine!" Merlin snaps. The knight meets his gaze, and Merlin shakes his head. "Leave it."
Gwaine closes his eyes before nodding in agreement. He turns back to Arthur. "You're damn lucky that Merlin is the most forgiving person in the world. Because if I had it my way, I'd have already started punching," he growls before leaving the room, making sure to bump into Arthur's shoulder on the way out.
Arthur frowns. "Is there something I should know?"
Merlin smiles. "No. Nothing at all."
"Are you sure? Because Gwaine seems to think I've done something."
"As it turns out, the only crime you're guilty of is being a complete and utter prat," Merlin informs Arthur.
"At least I'm not an idiot who wears ridiculous scarves all the time!"
Merlin yelps indignantly. "I happen to like my scarves!"
"You're the only one who does," Arthur snorts.
"Why, my king, I never realized fashion was so important to you!" Merlin gasps in mock surprise.
As Arthur sputters indignantly and eventually just tells Merlin to shut up, the warlock grins. Because unbeknownst to Arthur, he's been, for the first time, completely forgiven.
Merlin still misses Freya, of course. But he's learned how to live without her, and he thinks she'd be proud of him.
When Arthur eventually leaves the room, he goes to his bed and picks up the flower he'd given Freya. He'd enchanted it to stay forever fresh, and he smiles down at it now. "Hey, Freya," he says softly to it, "I know how to make strawberries now. I think you'd like them."