The last day before a vacation usually ended up with the entire student populace rushing to leave as soon as possible, whether it be to spend time with friends, family, or even just alone. Everybody looked forward to that momentary freedom before having to return to school, projects in hand. Most people had a way to get home as soon as they could, whether it be by driving themselves, getting in a friend or parents car, or (gods forbid) walking. Soapy probably could have hitched a ride with Flora (definitely not Felicia, though. She was a terrible driver! Soapy briefly wondered if she was in need of glasses) if they really wanted to, but they had been busy hanging out in the band hall until their friends left. They recalled a particularly amusing story Oboro had been telling them about a screaming pineapple toy.
Regardless, their time spent in the band hall made them momentarily forget that they needed a ride home (or to someone else's house), and they only remembered when all of their friends had left. They supposed they would just have to walk, despite hating the cold. At least they had a particularly warm jacket, though they still hadn't worn pants in favor of their (admittedly) thicker than usual leggings. The boots kept their feet warm, despite their hatred for shoes, and they supposed they would be fine to walk, as long as they distracted themself, which was really no problem. Soapy often hard a hard time focusing even when they tried.
It was with that thought in mind that they made their way to the front of the school. As school had already been over for a couple hours, it was understandable that Soapy was surprised to see a figure sitting out on one of the snowy benches. Looking up, Soapy noted that it actually was snowing, contrary to what the weather forecast had been that morning. They had to wonder how long that person had been sitting there. What if their fingers had gone numb? Well, that wouldn't do, and Soapy would have to give the person their gloves! They approached, though they weren't able to see the person's face as they were walking up from behind. It wasn't until they were about a meter away that they recognized the pale blond head of hair.
"Leon?" Soapy blinked, covering their mouth. They hadn't been meaning to say his name out loud. The two of them hadn't talked since the beginning of the year, though it occurred to Soapy that they were sort of being immature about the situation. It wasn't really a situation. Soapy just needed to get their attraction in check.
"S-Soapy?" Leon turned his head in surprise, cheeks flushed a noticeable pink from the cold. His teeth were chattering violently, and Soapy began to worry.
"How long have you been out here?" They took a seat next to their old friend after brushing the snow away. That didn't stop the metal from being freezing, though. Soapy made sure not to sit too close to him as well, feeling slightly nervous as they didn't know if Leon would even want to talk to them after how they treated him.
"Since s-school ended… I'm w-waiting for Camilla to p-pick me up." Soapy blinked. Leon didn't seem against talking to them, so that was good at least.
"Why didn't you just walk? You could've gotten home by now." Leon shook his head.
"I'm n-not allowed. Not by m-myself anyways." He pulled his scarf up to cover the lower half of his face, hiding his awfully pink nose. "... F-father was supposed to pick me up b-but something c-came up at work so I h-have to wait until Camilla gets into t-town."
"Aww, that sucks…" Soapy inched closer, wanting to help prevent Leon from freezing to death. "You wanna take my gloves?" They asked, pulling the warm items off as they looked at Leon's bare hands. Leon's fingers looked numb and unfortunate.
"Th-thanks…" He slipped them on gratefully, though he couldn't feel the difference and could barely move his fingers. "Don't you have to be g-getting home?"
"Well," Soapy shrugged. "Mom said I could go anywhere really, just as long as I tell her. She won't be worried for a few hours, and by then I'll probably have called her, so she wouldn't need to be worried at all." Leon hummed quietly, rubbing his hands together. "Why? You don't really look like you wanna get rid of me." He shook his head.
"I was sort of…" Soapy noticed that this stuttering had gone down, likely due to the readjustment of his scarf. "This is kind of embarrassing to ask, but I was wondering if you could walk me home? Father doesn't want me to be alone." Soapy thought that was kind of weird, considering the fact that Garon always sort of left his kids to their own devices.
"Sure!" Soapy stood from the bench, glad to free themself from the freezing metal. They offered a hand to help Leon stand, blushing when they remembered he was about eight inches taller than them. "W-wow, your hands are like icicles…"
"Well, I've sort of been out in the snow for a few hours. I would have gone inside, but the doors are all locked and the orchestra director left early." Soapy giggled.
"It was just a comment. Come on, let's go before you get like, pneumonia or something." They couldn't remember if pneumonia was sufficiently terrible. Perhaps they should have said frostbite instead.
Soapy tugged at his hand, and the two of them begin walking. They found it interesting to note that Leon had no objections to keeping their hands intertwined, though they supposed it probably had something to do with the cold. The walk was quiet, even after Soapy finished telling their mother that they would be going to Leon's house. Leon seemed to have a lot on his mind, and Soapy kept their gaze on their surroundings. Occasionally, they would point something out to their friend, at which point they would exchange a few words before falling back into silence. Soapy had never been big on silences, yet this one was oddly pleasant, especially with the feeling of Leon's gloved hand against theirs. It took the two of them around twenty minutes to reach the Anya household, and when they did, Soapy was disappointed to discover that it was only a few degrees warmer inside than it was out.
"Elise won't be home until later. She's at Sakura's house until father brings her back."
Soapy nodded, following Leon up to his room. It looked just as they remembered it, really. A large, soft bed with a large television set up directly across from it. Bookshelves lined the wall, sorted by subject matter and author. The desk was nearly covered in school-related things (along with various other things involving paper), though the thin, silver object that was his laptop was more often than not left on the bed due to the blankets combating the ever so cold temperatures of the house. After taking their boots off, they found that the plush carpet was soft as ever. Leon seemed to be rummaging in his dresser as Soapy sat on his bed, removing their jacket. He turned to look at Soapy, and Soapy noted that he was definitely still shivering, and likely wet from sitting in the snow for so long.
"I'm going to take a quick shower. Do you want a change of clothes or anything?" Soapy shook their head.
"I'm good. I was only out there for like, twenty minutes."
Leon nodded before taking his clothes with him to the bathroom. He flipped the heater on and started the shower before taking out his contacts and stripping, removing his binder as soon as he could. It had been a long day for him, and he'd definitely been binding for too long. A frown adorned his face and he let out a sigh. Normally, he would get home and just go completely binder and bra-less. Now that Soapy was there, that wasn't an option, but Leon knew it would be bad for his health if he went back to binding after his shower. While rummaging through his dresser, he'd chosen one of his baggiest sweaters, along with a tight sports bra. He hoped it would be enough to fool Soapy, and felt thankful that his breasts were rather small.
It was with a start that he realized he'd been standing in front of the mirror and scratching his chest for at least ten minutes. The skin beneath his fingers was raw and red, and he bit his lip in some form of shame. Scratching wouldn't help him, and any sort of self harm, intentional or not, was something he was trying to stop. His chest sort of felt like it was burning, and Leon hastened to get in the shower and stop looking at his body. He focused on other things that were going well. Niles and Odin were sympathetic to his struggles. The teachers helped him catch his grades up after he returned from the hospital. Soapy was in his room as he thought about things. Leon sighed, and small smile making its way onto his face. He wasn't really sure why Soapy had been avoiding him for so long, but it was nice to talk to them again. He'd missed the older boy quite a lot.
After about twenty more minutes, Leon got out of the shower, feeling much warmer than he had before. It was probably one of the longer showers he'd taken as of late, but he doubted Soapy minded. In his experience, he'd found that Soapy's showers could last anywhere from thirty minutes to several hours. He wasn't completely sure what Soapy even did with all that time. Returning to his room showed that Soapy was halfway under the covers of his bed, scribbling something in some sort of sketchbook. Leon sat beside him, adjusting the large sweater he was wearing and slouching slightly so as to maintain the appearance of a flat chest.
"What are you drawing?" Soapy looked a bit startled for a moment, but shook it off.
"I've been making jewelry." He showed Leon the sketch. "What do you think?"
"It looks chunky." Leon said bluntly, and Soapy giggled.
"That's the point! I'm trying to make the gaudiest stuff I can think of. See, these other ones are basically just a bunch of fake gemstones stuck together in the shape of a necklace." Leon suppressed a laugh.
"These are hideous."
"I know. I can't wait to show them to Oboro. She's going to have a fit!" He frowned.
"Which one is Oboro?"
"Oh, she has dark hair and sort of hates everyone in orchestra. She's really nice and fashionable otherwise, though." Soapy smiled.
"Right. I remember her. We met the first day I came back, during lunch."
"Oh yeah… I was eating with Felicia and Takumi, too." Leon huffed at the mention of Takumi's name. "What?"
"Nothing… How has Felicia been doing? I haven't been talking to her very much." It was weird to think that she was a Junior already.
"Oh, she's…" Soapy laughed. "I was going to say she's great, but I remembered she got a job as a waitress somewhere."
"I feel bad for both the customers and the rest of the staff."
"Flora also works there, and I think Jakob is in the middle of applying?" Leon nodded quietly.
"That's good at least."
There was a moment of silence between them, only broken by a soft meow from outside Leon's door. He got up to let Rose in, picking the cat up after closing the door. She was rather large, being a maine coon, but Leon only felt the need to carry her as far as the bed. Soapy giggled, petting her with glee. Leon couldn't help but smile as he returned to his seat by his friend. Rose curled up between them, and a portion of time was spent petting her until she fell asleep. Leon was feeling warm and pretty happy at that point. That was when Soapy started asking questions.
"Why doesn't your dad want you walking home alone, anyways?" He frowned.
"I…" Leon wasn't really sure if he wanted to talk about it yet. "I just… I messed up."
"Umm, okay…" Soapy obviously found that response to be a bit odd. "I was also kind of wondering why you disappeared for a week."
"... I messed up."
"Okay…" He was frowning, likely in confusion.
"... Why were you ignoring me?" Soapy blinked.
"I wasn't-"
"Yes you were."
"... I was being dumb."
"You're not dumb." Leon sighed. "If I… If I tell you what I did will you please tell my why?" He looked at Soapy with hope and reluctance.
"I… If it's such a big deal then yeah, I guess."
"I might have…" Leon looked away from Soapy. "Tried to kill myself."
"Wha- but why?" Soapy exclaimed, grabbing Leon's hand without thinking. Leon blushed slightly, looking at their hands before focussing his gaze on Rose.
"I'm depressed. I don't know if you noticed last year, because it wasn't as bad, but…" He bit his lip. "I don't know, you were ignoring me, and I was avoiding Niles, and Odin was always with Niles or his other friends so I couldn't really talk to him either, and I didn't want to talk to Camilla…" Leon bit his lip in shame before continuing. "I regret it now, but I still did it. If Elise hadn't found me I would be dead right now."
"Leon, I'm so sorry."
"No, it's oka-" Soapy hugged him, and Leon felt tears start to form in his eyes. "It's not okay." He sniffled, hugging him back. "I just want things to be how they were freshman year."
"I'm sorry…" Soapy mumbled. "I feel like a huge jerk, now…" Leon shook his head, wiping his eyes.
"I'm sure you had your reasons…"
"They were stupid reasons… What happened with Niles? You two seem fine now." Soapy loosened their hold on Leon, but kept hugging him.
"I… We dated for about a month before he broke up with me."
"You dated Niles?" Leon blushed.
"He's a nice person, when you get to know him. Anyways, it didn't work out because he cares about me too much or something."
"That doesn't make any sense." Soapy pouted.
"Well, it's the best kind of answer I can give you. A better explanation would be too personal, and I don't want to talk about it." He frowned. "What are your 'stupid reasons' for ignoring me?"
"I, umm…" Soapy backed away from Leon, thinking this was probably the sort of thing they should say when they weren't hugging him. "Jeeze, after everything that's been going on with you I feel like an ass."
"Just tell me."
"You were hot." Both of them blushed.
"E-excuse me?"
"You got hot all of a sudden and I didn't know how to deal with it! The day you came back was the first time I ever got a boner in public!" Soapy covered their face, feeling thoroughly embarrassed. Leon looked startled, his face bright red.
"You think I'm hot?" He pointed at himself, as if asking if there were anybody else in the room Soapy could be talking to.
"I know, it's weird, I'm sorry. Like, I thought you were cute last year but that was more of like a little brother kind of way, and I don't know what the heck you did over the summer, but you showed up and I barely recognized you and you're like six feet tall and you-"
"Gods, we're both idiots."
"What?"
Leon leaned over, pausing slightly before kissing the other. Soapy's eyes widened, and they didn't know what to do. Luckily for them, Leon pulled away momentarily. Neither of them said anything for a while, as they weren't exactly sure what it was they should be saying to each other at that moment. They were both blushing, sort of awkwardly looking at each other. It was Leon who broke the silence.
"That was fine, right?" Soapy swallowed a lump that had formed in their throat.
"Y-yes!" They bit their lip.
"I've sort of had a crush on you since we first met. I never expected you to… actually like me back. I thought we were just going to stay friends, and I was okay with that, but it's nice that that's not what happened." He smiled a little shyly.
"I just don't get how you could like someone like me… I'm dumb and fat." Soapy wrapped their arms around themself.
"You're not dumb, and there's nothing wrong with how you look." Leon hugged them. "I never thought you would like someone like me, but here we are."
"So are you my boyfriend now?"
"Well, I'd like to be." Soapy giggled.
"I've never had a real boyfriend. Hey, you dated Niles, you have to teach me how to kiss!" Leon laughed.
"You're ridiculous." The two of them laughed, exchanging short, innocent kisses as they talked about this and that. An hour passed before Soapy seemed to have a thought, their face falling. "What's wrong?"
"Nothing, I was just thinking… Maybe if I just told you at the beginning of the year instead of being dumb, you wouldn't have…" Leon shushed them.
"Don't think about it. What's done is done, and there's no point in thinking of what there could have been. I'm just happy to be with you now."
He smiled, and Soapy seemed to accept that. They giggled when Leon yawned, and Soapy realized Leon must be exhausted from waiting out in the cold for so long. Leon insisted that he wasn't that tired, but Soapy could see his eyelids drooping. They made him lie down, and he pulled them down with him, resting his head on their chest. A small meow came from where Rose had been resting, and she got up, adjusting herself to be comfortable with their new position. Leon mumbled to put his most recently watched show on Netflix, and Soapy obliged. It had something to do with birds. Soon the two of them were drifting off to sleep, despite it only being eight-thirty.
Word Count: 3,052
In case you don't know, this is a part of my larger modern AU, which I mostly post as separate one/twoshots due to the fact that I don't write them in order, and there isn't a definite "Endplan" or conclusion for the series. I could continue until they grow old and die, after all.
As such, there are, of course, little references to other fics in the series, but it should still be comprehensible if you haven't read them!
This wasn't part of my update schedule, and is in fact the most recent fic of the modern AU that I've completed (the REAL most recent fic is an unfinished fic about Leon being on his period and suffering and Soapy just wants to Help) BUT I am posting this tonight because I didn't get around to finishing the latest chapter of my Awakening fic, Another Chance, which is supposed to update every Saturday.
To make up for the lack of chapter on Another Chance, I decided to post FOUR chapters of Definitely Better as opposed to the usual TWO, and BOTH parts of this fic!
If you stand by, I should have the second, extra chapter posted soon, so if you'd like to see that, stick around!
