DISCLAIMER: I own nothing.

A/N: Been binge-watching Southland all summer and this came to me.

Another day, another ride in the patrol car. Ben was trying hard not to let his T.O.'s abrasiveness bother him; he'd probably been specially trained by LAPD on how to make sure rookies were ready for the job. Midmorning, they stopped at a glorified food truck with counter seating. Ben didn't place an order.

"Trying to get ready for Speedo season, Beverly Hills?" asked Cooper.

Ben shrugged. "Just not hungry."

"Are you sure?" Cooper pressed.

"I'm fine."

"Suit yourself, boot," said Cooper, biting into a huge, greasy cheeseburger.

Cooper was just finishing up his lunch when they got called to a smash-and-grab at a local jewelry store. After the smash-and-grab, there was a hit-and-run. Someone drove away from a gas station without paying. Teenagers were tagging a park bathroom. A tourist got mugged. Someone tried to walk out of an electronics store with a chin-high stack of DVDs. Another car accident. Chickie and Dewey arrived to help them direct traffic around it. They noticed the rookie's slow movements.

"Is he okay?" asked Chickie.

"The boot decided not to take advantage of our meal break and guess what happened?"

Dewey laughed his irritating laugh. "Classic boot move!" He cupped his hands over his mouth and shouted across the street, "Hey, boot! Want me to make you a bottle so you can go night-night?"

"What?" Ben shouted back, having only heard "Hey, boot."

"Never mind!" Dewey bellowed.

Just as the scene was cleared, dispatch put out a burglary call.

"We'll take it," Cooper told Chickie and Dewey, waving for Ben to join him.

As they got back in the car, the rookie looked vaguely uncomfortable.

"What's-a matter, boot? Is your tummy empty?" Cooper taunted. Ben didn't admit to it, but he didn't need to; the new kids always made the same mistakes. "What'd I tell you this morning?"

"Look sharp, act sharp, be sharp," Ben recited.

"Good boy," said Cooper as though praising a dog. "Another question, boot, can you act sharp, let alone be sharp when you're too busy thinking about your poor little empty tummy?"

"No," Ben answered honestly, bracing himself for another jab.

"Then here's a lesson in patrol they don't teach you in the academy," said Cooper. "Eat when you have the opportunity because you never know when you'll get another. Even if you don't think you're hungry, eat. And I don't mean a piece of fruit or a salad or some shit like that. Real food: cheeseburgers, burritos, a big carton of China Palace."

"Chickie eats salad," Ben pointed out.

"Chickie is a different story," said Cooper. "She knows her limits. You don't yet, so better be safe than sorry. And before you ask, no, we're not going on meal break after this call. You need to learn from your mistake and know what it feels like to have your stomach bitch at you for hours on end. Some days, you don't get a meal break and just have to play through the pain. You'll remember that feeling and, if you're as smart as you think you are, you're not gonna do this again. Am I clear?"

"Crystal, sir," said Ben.

They parked on the street in front of the burglary victim's house.

"You're on point, boot." Cooper informed him.

They climbed up the porch and Ben, still wearing his bright green traffic vest, hesitantly knocked on the door.

"Harder than that," said Cooper, tapping the door with the end of his baton.

A grandmotherly lady opened the door, wringing her hands. She let them in. Ben immediately noticed the smell of baking cookies. He took out his notebook and started asking questions. The woman pointed out the missing items, mostly framed photos and a box full of costume jewelry. Ben radioed to request some detectives from the robbery squad. He assured the woman they'd do everything they could to find her property.

"I'd feel so much safer if you two would wait here with me," said the woman, Mrs. Martin, according to Ben's notes.

"Happy to, ma'am," Cooper obliged.

"Can I get you nice young men a cookie?" she asked.

Cooper patted Ben's shoulder. "My partner here would love one."

Ben looked questioningly at his training officer as the woman shuffled off to get the cookies.

"Another important rule: Always accept offers of baked goods from little old ladies," Cooper said seriously. He was a tough T.O., but that didn't make him entirely heartless.

THE END