HEY GUYS I'M NOT DEAD YET HAHA.

Also, here, have some GaLe.

"Why am I even surprised," Laxus sighed, staring at the boy and girl on his doorstep.

"Please help," Gajeel begged. "This is so uncomfortable."

"Yeah," Laxus said, studying the way his arm was superglued to the girl's hair. "Yeah, I can see that."

"I hate you so much," the girl growled at him, and to Laxus's eternal shock, his brother flinched. Which possibly signified the end of the world because Gajeel did not flinch. Ever.

Especially not because of little girls who barely reached up to his chest.

"Oookay," Laxus said, leaning against the doorway. "I require an explanation. First off, who are you, and why in the world would you ever decide to do anything involving my idiot brother?"

"Hey!"

"Believe me, it wasn't my choice," the girl huffed. "We got assigned to a group project. Unfortunately, his hairstyling skills really suck."

Laxus's eyes flicked from his brother to the girl. "What kind of group project was this?"

"Skit," Gajeel sighed. "I was working on the paper mache for one of the props. She was supposed to be an actor. Things went very, very wrong."

Laxus decided that was explanation enough and stood aside. "You'd better come in. That glue isn't going to be easy to get off."

"You're not going to have to cut off my hair, right?" the girl asked nervously.

"No promises, kiddo, sorry. By the way, if I'm going to let you into my house, I should probably know your name."

"Levy McGarden. Sorry for intruding."

"Please," Laxus sighed as both kids slipped past him into the house, "if you knew what I have to deal with every day, you'd know that's the least of my worries."

Natsu didn't stop laughing for at least five minutes.

"Please knock him out for me," Gajeel moaned as his younger brother rolled around, pounding the wooden floor with his fist. "Five dollars to the first person who actually does it."

"Also a death sentence," Laxus countered sharply. "He's already screwed up enough without you adding to it."

"Hey!" Natsu protested, suddenly sober. "You can't say that isn't funny!"

"Do I look like I'm laughing?" his older brother snapped, accidentally dunking Levy's face in the sink. She squeaked and spluttered.

"Gajeel," Laxus grunted after apologizing, "I swear to Mavis, if this stuff is superglue…"

Gajeel looked extremely uncomfortable after this statement, and Laxus sincerely hoped that it was because he was still glued to Levy, not because his previous assumption was true.

Oh, who was he kidding. Of course it was superglue. This was his brother they were talking about.

"Maybe you should Google how to get the glue off," Wendy suggested, pulling a freshly baked batch of cookies from the oven. Natsu pounced on them immediately, and Laxus steamed because Wendy's cookies were heaven and if that little twerp ate them all before he managed to get Gajeel and Levy unglued he'd have a freaking cow.

Yeah. That's right. A cow.

Erik poked his head into the kitchen, probably sensing the cookies somehow. The kid's intuition was terrifying, and like everybody else, he was addicted to the cookies. Before he even made it a step toward them, though, Laxus leveled a finger at him.

"Google something for me. How to get superglue off stuff. Also, Natsu, if you eat another cookie, you're ending up in the basement for the rest of the day."

Natsu said something that was probably very indignant and very rude, but was completely incoherent due to all the cookies in his mouth. With a strange kind of horror, Laxus realized that the cookies hadn't even cooled yet, and were therefore still soft.

And. He'd eaten. Half. Of them.

How his younger brother was still alive was completely beyond him, but Levy let out a small whimper, and Laxus decided that he already had enough to worry about for one day. "Erik, hurry up."

"Nail polish remover," was Erik's response. "That, and lots of hot water."

A groan tore its way out of Laxus's throat because the hot water wasn't working and who the heck uses nail polish remover in this house? He was firmly against the idea of any of his siblings getting their grubby little hands on chemicals of any kind, even Wendy, because chances were, Natsu was going to get it from her in the end.

He glanced at Levy. "Well, kid, I'm sorry, but I think we're going to have to get out the scissors for this."

"Wh-What? Couldn't somebody go pick up some nail polish remover?" Levy squeaked, eyes wide with fear. Laxus sighed, shaking his head.

"If I let any of these twerps near chemicals, the next thing I know, I'll be picking up the phone and the FBI will be hollering about some terrorist attacks. I'd like to leave your hair alone, I really would. But unless you wanna stay stuck to Gajeel for the rest of eternity…"

Levy shot Gajeel a look so full of hate, Laxus almost winced. "Ugh. No. I'll… I'll take the alternative."

"All right then. Wendy, I think you'd better do this thing. I don't know the first thing about girls' hair."

"Here she is!"

Wendy popped out of her bedroom, smiling, and skipped to the side. Levy peeked out a second later, looking nervous.

"All right, kid, come on," Laxus said gruffly. "We don't have all day, you know."

Shyly, she stepped out of the room. "Do I… Do I look okay?"

Behind him, Laxus swore he heard Gajeel's jaw drop.

After chopping off the part of Levy's hair that was stuck to Gajeel's arm, Wendy had shoved her into her room to "fix it up a bit." Levy's newly cut hair was now held back by a pretty yellow hairband, soft curls framing her face. Formerly waist-long, it brushed her shoulders, looking soft and shiny and fluffy. Self-consciously, she pushed a lock behind her ear, blushing under the many stares.

Laxus broke the silence. "Not too bad, kiddo."

"Yeah," Natsu chimed in. "It looks a lot better than it did before Wendy started trying to fix it."

"Dang, I should get Wendy to do my hair, too," Sting said excitedly. "Can I have a Mohawk?"

"Only if you want to look like a total dumbass," Laxus growled. "No more hair issues today, please."

Levy actually smiled. "I think… I think I actually like it better this way. It's so… light."

Wendy beamed under the praise, and Laxus almost missed Gajeel trying to sneak out of the room – with some of the cookies.

He snatched his brother up by the collar. "And where do you think you're going? Don't you have something to say to the lady?"

Gajeel did a very unflattering spluttering thing.

Laxus shoved him toward Levy. "Oh, grow up, you little twerp."

Gajeel stood there staring at the floor for five full seconds before looking up and mumbling, "Sorry."

"Uh, what? I couldn't hear that."

"Shut up, Laxus!" he snapped. "I'm… sorry, okay? I screwed up with the glue. It's my fault your hair got cut."

Levy regarded him for a couple more seconds in complete silence.

Then, she sighed, and managed a shrug. "S'okay. I needed a haircut anyway."

Gajeel actually offered a smile, and slowly, Levy smiled back. Laxus could feel the corners of his mouth tugging up as well – until, of course, Natsu shattered the moment.

"Okay, can we stop with the googly eyes already? We've got some cookies to eat!"