"Fucking children Glynda."

"Yes sir."

"We take fucking children, and make them fight monsters."

"Yes, sir."

He looked at her, mouth ajar, hands held out pleadingly.

"What the fuck is wrong with us?"

"I don't know sir."

"... Children! Do you have no heart woman?"

"No, sir."

"So, we take kids from normal school."

"Yes,"

"When… How old are they when they start?"

"Eight sir."

"Eight?"

"Eight."

"... Jesus! And I thought this was a good idea? Why the hell was that a good idea?"

"You were very insistent. You've been doing it for years."

"But, why?"

"Something about hardship creating the perfect warrior. Blah blah, ends justify means, blah blah."

"But child endangerment? Huntsmen and huntresses die Glynda."

"I didn't."

"That's because you can literally levitate and throw anything that gets too close to you. Your semblance would make it nearly impossible for you to die."

"Also 'cause I'm not a punk ass bitch."

"And… And there's a fifteen year old here now?! Seventeen is horrible, but fifteen is monstrous."

"How so sir?"

"I mean, at seventeen, they have some life experience. Had their first kisses, heartbreak, friends… There's at least something there. But fifteen?"

"Don't forget that you got her mom killed."

"What?"

"Remember Summer?"

"No… I…"

"You were so convinced that because she had those special eyes that welding her scythe shut would unlock her hidden potential when you threw her into a forest full of Deathstalkers."

"... And now her fifteen year old daughter is at Beacon?"

"Yep,"

"A school which prepares children for a job with an average life expectancy of six years?"

"Job security's pretty good though. Lot of turnover in the market, but there's always something to be found."

"Glynda, why would these children want to do this? Why would they come to Beacon?"

"To be fair, we only have a forty-eight percent graduation rate."

"Oh, that… That actually makes me feel a little better."

"None of them dropped out though."

"What? Then how… Oh no."

"Oh yes,"

Ozpin buried his face in his hands.

"I would like to remind you I was against the idea of letting Ruby into the school."

"SO WHY DIDN'T YOU STOP ME?" He snapped at the woman.
"... She ate all my cookies." Ozpin just stared at Glynda. She shrugged, and brought his coffee cup to her lips, taking a long sip of the cream-liqueur infused drink. "It was a bitch move. She deserves to die screaming."

Ozpin rubbed his temples.

"And then I threw them off a cliff?"

"Yeup."

"I…"

"You also greenlit them going on a mission that was coded for four fully fledged hunters."

"Glynda-"

"You also had a very serious discussion with James about ripping a soul out of one person and shoving it into a first year."

"Glynda-"

"Speaking of him, do you think Ironwood's wood is iron?"

"Would-"

"And you let an ex-terrorist into the school."

"Please-"

"Mm and the kid that hadn't done any combat training before because, quote, 'greatness comes from humble beginnings.'"

"Glynda-"

"Come to think of it, how the hell is he still alive? If he makes it another week Port's gonna win the betting pool."

"GLYNDA!"

"Yes?" She seemed to remember he was there.

"Give me the coffee."

"You're the one who thought it was a good idea to try being sober."

"I was wrong. So very wrong."

Glynda shrugged and handed him the cup.

"One last thing."

"Mm?"

"Don't ever let me get sober again."

Here's part 2!

I do in fact take requests. Up next is the Weiss and Ruby coffee scene, as per a previous request. Food fight is coming up soon too.

Gotta run.

Cheers,

-Unjax