Lesson 1
Rules Of The Game

A couple weeks later found a stern looking young woman in front of my desk, square rimmed glasses flashing dangerously in the school lighting as she scowled down at me.

I just opened my mouth and yawned, blinking blearily at her as I waited. Despite not having actually met her before, I could recognize the girl in front of me easily. The other teachers had bemoaned and praised her strict, and upright demeanor in equal measure, after all. Sona Shitori was infamous as the new student council president for intimidating even most of the staff. From the way she had barged in here and demanded an explanation about...something, and her impressive scowl, I got the feeling I was her next target.

"Well?!" She all but yelled at me.

Sticking my pinky in my ear to clear it of some wax, I looked up at her with a bored expression. "Hm, did you say something?"

The wooden clipboard held within her hands snapped in half, her fingers spasming as a vein appeared on her forehead. Behind her, the students in my home room class all began to sweat as the tried to surreptitiously scooch their desks away from the petite girl standing at the front of the room.

"Mr. Uzumaki, it is my understanding that you have not been under employ since you were terminated 4 years ago! How you have gone this long without being thrown off the premises, or why the schoolboard still pays you boggle my mind. But I will not have it! I demand you leave immediately."

Oh, is that what this was about? I wondered as I blinked up at her. In the back I could see some of my students slumping down into their seats in some form of relief, and I had to stifle a chuckle. Looking up at the girl with an amused smile, I said, "No."

It took a moment for my response to sink in, as she blinked, but when it did her face went slack. Then, her pale cheeks began to flush red with righteous anger. "What do you mean no?! This is not a joke, sir! If you do not leave, I will have to call the police."

A collective sigh emerged from the mouths of my students, and as Sona turned quizzically at the sound, I smiled as they all pointed to the windows. Outside, one could see the beautiful morning sky, small white puffs of clouds floating along as large, lush trees shot up into the air from below. And from those trees, right outside the windows to the classroom, one could see a group of men and a couple women dangling from ropes, gagged and dressed up in kabuki paint and wardrobes, their badges and uniform visible beneath.

Sona let out a strangled sound of disbelief and frustration.

Once more, I just yawned and leaned back in my seat. Smacking my lips, I said, "Yeah...good luck with that last one. They try to take me in at least once a month." Leaning forward, I looked out the window curiously. "I'm starting to think they're using me as some sort of hazing process for newbies. Don't think I've seen a familiar face in months."

Seriously, what did this girl expect? They'd tried calling in the cops like a week or two after they'd officially fired me. Things hadn't worked out any better for that group than this one. Ever since, it had become something of a battle of wills for them. Despite never succeeding, they refused to give up, and as such sent in a group to try and arrest me every now and then. At the same time, they also refused to bring in the higher ups or use large amounts of excessive force.

Really, I had to respect their never give up attitude. Reminded me of myself.

Also, at some point, I'd made friends with a few of the regulars. Huh, actually I wondered what Shizu was up to lately? It had been awhile since we went for drinks.

"...I see this will be more difficult than first expected." Sona muttered under her breath, shifting her glasses and turning to look at me with a determined glare. "What will it take to get you to leave this place?"

Raising an eyebrow at her, I just let out a small chuckle. "It'd take a lot more than you have to make me leave here, girl. I've got a job to do, and I'm gonna do it no matter what anyone says." Then I scowled. "Not that any of these kids seem to be picking up anything I teach them, dammit! How hard is it to use proper punctuation now and then?!" Glaring at the students in my classroom, they all had the consideration to duck their heads and smile sheepishly.

In comparison, the student council president's eyes just narrowed further. "There must be something. What is you goal here? Why do you refuse to leave?"

Whoo boy. Now wasn't that a loaded question. Still, it was clear this girl wasn't going to give up any time soon, and while I was fine with that, this was starting to get a bit bothersome. It was times like this where I regretted not learning any genjutsu. That'd solve my problem right quick.

Cocking my head to the side, there was a low grumble in the back of my head, as Kurama poked his nose up for once with an idea. Hrmm, that may just work.

Lips quirking into a small, amused smirk, I said, "Tell you what. How about a bet. I win, you leave me alone for a month. You win, I'll pack up and leave."

Suspicious, she was wary as she asked, "What kind of bet?"

"Simple. We play a sport or game or what have you, and who ever wins, wins the bet. Your pick of game."

If there was one thing I had learned about this world, it was that physically? They kind of sucked. Most of them, anyway. Even without Chakra, I could outdo pretty much anyone. Which meant pretty much no matter what she picked, I'd win. If it was a sport, I was stronger, faster and had more stamina. If it was something like poker, I could cheat like a mother-

"Alright, then we'll play a game of chess."

FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU-

"Knight to F7. Check."

A bead of sweat trickled down my cheek as I stared intently at the board. I didn't even have to look up to see the smug little smirk of my diabolical, manipulative opponent. Mark my words, there was mountain of pure, unsaturated evil, behind that delicate face, and square glasses.

Shitori Sona was a devil.

Of all the games she could have picked why did it have to be chess? Honestly, I wasn't too familiar with the game and had even needed a brief overview of the rules. It was apparently quite a bit like shogi, and from the few times Shika had conned me into playing with him, I already knew I was at a disadvantage. Not only was this the kind of game that took years to master, it also required extreme amounts of thinking.

Not that I was incapable of that. Basic strategy and tactics were a necessary part of my profession, after all. It's just that...well, I'd kind of always just left that kind of thing up to instinct. This was also the kind of game that required lots and lots of deception and bluffing. Which, again, I was actually pretty good at, just not...this kind. The complicated stuff, y'know? Where you had to think every little thing through and account for every possible scenario. That just wasn't how I worked.

Simple was best. Why bungle everything up by bogging it down with unneeded details? Sleight of hand, trickery, bluffs...I could do that, and they were all apart of my arsenal, but I never went for anything to intricate.

Ironically, the first time I had played Shika, I'd almost won because of that. It had come down to one last move, where he'd sprung some trap thought dozens of moves beforehand, and I'd had him down to three pieces.

Heh, thinking about it almost brought a smile to my face.

"Is there something you find amusing about this situation, Mr. Uzumaki? If I'm not mistaken, you appear to be losing." Sona asked, straight-backed and all prim and proper as she sat across from me.

Sighing, I leaned back into my chair and gave her a small smile. "Ah, nothing. Just this whole thing reminded me of someone."

She quirked an eyebrow. "Oh?"

Chuckling, I reached into my breast pocket and pulled out my pack of cigarettes. Lighting one, I took a small drag from it and smirked as she crinkled her nose in displeasure at the smoke. Hooray for small victories.

"An old friend of mine was quite fond of beating me in Shogi, when he could get me to play. From what I can tell, the two of you use quite similar strategies."

"Really? You must forgive me if I don't find this surprising in the least." Oh, looks like the girl had a bit of bite to her after all. I'd gotten the sense she was one for overly formal politeness in all situations. Most likely, though, I'd probably just pushed the right buttons to make her aggressive. Thoughts that were confirmed as she scowled as she outright scowled as I exhaled the smoke from my death stick.

"Mm. The only real difference in this situation, though, is one small fact."

"And that is?"

I smiled. "My friend was quite a bit smarter than you." Enjoying the small twitch that developed in her eye, I took another look at the board and returned to cursing mentally. She really did have me in a bad spot. Probably.

Maybe.

I think.

The thing was, I wasn't lying with my last comment. What a lot of people didn't seem to get about Shikamaru, was that sometimes? Sometimes he was too smart for his own good. Not even I had really realized that, until that first game of Shogi and it's close game.

He'd looked me in the eye, and told me I was the worst sort of opponent.

Like I said before, it's not that I could out-think him, or even out-trick him. Not when it came to these kind of games, anyway. It's that I was the exact opposite. In a world full of ninjas, and illusions and tricks and bluffs and lies and hidden daggers, people kind of get used to it all. Just like Kakashi taught me, always look underneath the underneath.

Good advice.

Except for when there wasn't an underneath the underneath. Shikamaru, and most everyone else, were all too used to there being traps around every corner and hidden in every move, that when you presented them with something overt and obvious, they tended to hesitate. Overthink things. Give them a box with a ton of active explosive tags inside, and tell them they're inside, and they'll spend the time those tags are taking to go off to try and figure out what the trick is, what you're lying about or not saying. Even when the box and what's inside it really is just what you say it is.

I'm many things, there are many thing I am both good and bad at. Long, intricate plans aren't my forte, but people? I liked to think I was good with people. So when I see someone like Shika, the best possible thing to do is be completely upfront and honest, because nothing will throw them off more than that.

Sona wasn't like that. If I had to compare her to anyone, it'd be Sakura.

This worked both for and against me. On one hand, I knew Sakura quite well, and knew what buttons to push just right to get the response that O want. On the other hand, Sakura always was able to see right through me.

While I sincerely doubted Sona was quite as adept as Sakura at the latter, she was proving quite adept at seeing through any plans or strategies I tried to employ in our little game.

But if there's one thing I'd learned over the years? When you're on the verge of losing, there's one simple way to grasp victory from the jaws of defeat.

Change the rules of the game.

And I already had a headstart. Now? Now it was time to get on to phase two.

'Oi, Kurama! Wake your lazy ass up!

Sona Sitri was... unsettled.

Originally, she had not expected there to be too much trouble when she had walked into Uzumaki's Classroom. Despite only being the Student Council President, and only for a couple months at that, she had a lot of influence on the inner workings of the school. After all, her family, along with the Gremory, had quite the tidy sum invested in the academy. Combined with her strict, no non sense attitude and she could cow even the hardiest of the staff.

Except for one Uzumaki Naruto, it seemed.

She had heard of him before of course. There wasn't a student in the school who hadn't. Before, she had paid the rumors no mind, because there was no way any teacher could be as uncouth and unprofessional as the man had been described. The only way someone could get away with that in this school was if they were involved in the...supernatural side of things, and she had been briefed on every member of the school who was.

Uzumaki was not one of them.

Still, it seems she perhaps should have taken heed of the rumors, as they had turned out to be true. This had come to her attention when reviewing the documentation for all detentions held within the last month. One in particular had caught her interest.

Hyoudou Issei had been a pest for the female students ever since he had gained entry to the school. With the amount of detentions and complaints he had gained since the start of the school year, he would normally be suspended or even expelled at this point. However, Rias and herself were quite certain the boy possessed a Sacred Gear, which made him a valuable asset. If it was up to her, she would have gotten rid of him by now, but Rias seemed to have taken a liking to the boy.

What was interesting was that in the last few weeks, Hyoudou hadn't had a single complaint filed against him. From what she had heard, the boy had even publicly apologized to most of the girls he had peeped on. And then he had joined the Boy's Kendo Team, to the bewilderment of all. Since then, he hadn't had even one detention. Not since his detention with Uzumaki.

The man's report on the encounter had given her some insight into the situation, though it had been brief and minimalistic. Despite how effective Uzumaki's 'methods' had been with the boy, however, they were a clear breach of the rules. Sone had planned to simply file an infraction against the man, but after some digging had found that would not be possible as Uzumaki was not even listed as working at the school. And yet, the school still paid him his salary and there was an entire storage room devoted to holding all the complaints filed against him!

It seems the rumors had been true. Kuoh's School Board had fired the man 4 years ago, but he had just...never left. Seeing as no one else seemed to want to deal with the problem, she had gone to do it on her own.

Which led to her current situation.

She was winning. She knew she was. Uzumaki had made a critical mistake by allowing her to choose the game. With anyone else she might have hesitated. The man was a teacher after all, and that usually meant one could be expected to have a certain level of intellect. Though she still most likely would have won, the chances of her losing would have been higher. But it seemed she had pegged the man correctly, in that most of his plays and strategies were simple and easily seen through.

And yet...and yet...she'd made a mistake.

Sona Sitri never made mistakes!

Over the course of the game, the man had been slowly making her more and more agitated. How could someone like him call himself a teacher?! He was rude, uncouth and arrogant beyond belief. Her frustration was only equaled by the satisfaction she felt at her assured win over this man.

Right up until things had changed.

It had been a slow thing. Something that had built up over time, piece by piece, until she had noticed her hand visibly shaking as she picked up one of her pieces. That had been the thing that sparked her realization.

Nothing about him had changed. Not the vacantly bored expression on his face, not the slouched way in which he held himself, not even in the way he played the game. Yet he was most assuredly different. More intense. As if his presence had magnified tenfold when he wasn't paying attention. The feeling he gave off now...it scared her.

Was it just her imagination, or did his lips just quirk up ever so slightly? Had she imagined that flash of red in his eyes? And suddenly, where before it had seemed like nothing about hm had changed, it was as if everything had.

He didn't move, but something in his body language shifted, and he was smiling. There was something dark and amused in that smile.

"Is there something wrong? It's your move." His voice wasn't different either, but it distracted her from her thoughts.

"No, everything is fine." She didn't let anything show on her face, or in her voice. Her eyes flicked down to the board and she felt the urge to scowl. As she had thought, she had messed up in her last turn. Though she was definitely still winning, it had set her back a few turns at least. Luckily, whatever it was about him that had set off her mental danger alarms was receding.

It made no sense to her. Uzumaki definitely wasn't part of the supernatural world, or she'd know about him. And she couldn't sense any real potential for magic in him either, nor any Sacred Gears or anything out of the norm. But no one normal should be able to give off the feeling she had gotten from him mere moments ago.

Sona would be lying if she said it hadn't rattled her.

The rest of the game proceeded in silence, neither party saying anything. Just like she'd predicted, her victory had been set back a few turns, but she was slowly whittling down his number of pieces. Every now and then, though, her hand would shake, and she'd have second thoughts about the move she'd just made. Had that been the move she'd wanted to make? Was it really a good one? Should she have done something else? Each and every time she'd dismiss the thoughts quickly, but she felt much less sure of her victory.

Somehow, when the game finally ended, with her having reduced him to nothing but a Rook and a Pawn, she was unsurprised with the result.

"I lost."

Her voice was hollow, and without emotion, as she went over every move of the game in her head, trying to comprehend the how.

'You truly are one tricky bastard, you know that?' Kurama chuckled amusedly in the back of my mind, as he retreated in the depths of my consciousness.

In response, I just took a drag of my cigarette, and blew out a ring of smoke. What he said wasn't untrue, though I really couldn't have pulled that off without his help. Normally, getting the fox to help out with something like this would be a pain in the ass, but to be completely honest...

He was as bored as I was, most of the time. Not to mention, for however much progress Kurama had made in not being a gigantic mass of rage and hatred, he still had a mean streak a mile wide. Getting a few kicks out of messing with some random kid was basically the highlight of his day.

My eyes flitted over the girl sitting across from me, and then towards the students that had been paying rapt attention to the whole thing. Sona was staring intently at the board, while my students just seemed to be sitting there, stupefied, not comprehending what had happened.

I sighed.

Did I really have to spell everything out for them?

Taking another long drag off of my cigarette, I expelled a large amount of smoke into the air, watching it curl into intricate patterns as I put out what was left.

"I cheated."

Blunt, uncaring, and completely true. Two simple words managed to draw the entire attention of the whole class, and the girl too, as she looked up sharply in disbelief.

"Impossible. I kept track of every move the whole game!"

Ignoring her, I looked around, examining each and every one of my students. They all looked just as surprised as she did. Dammit, didn't these kids notice anything?!

"Che, none of you lackwits noticed? No one?" I gave them a moment to respond, hoping that someone, anyone would speak up and say they had caught it.

No such luck, it seemed.

Rolling my eyes, I scowled and spoke back up. "Do I really have to explain everything to you dumbasses? Alright, pay attention because I'll only go over this once!" My voice was gruff, and my gaze was stern as I looked at them, watching in satisfaction as everyone began to sit up straight. In front of me, Sona looked slightly bewildered as her gaze leaped from me to the class.

"Let's start with the beginning. What did you notice?"

There was a moment, as they shared glances with eachother, confused. Hesitantly, one in the front, a mousy looking brunette poke up. "U-uhm...you were losing badly?"

I pinched my brow in frustration. "What else." A demand, rather than a question.

This time it was a boy who spoke. "Err...you didn't seem to be putting in much effort? Most of your moves were simple and quick, like you didn't care, I guess."

Raising a brow, I said, "You guess? Whatever, next."

"You kept blowing smoke in Shitori-san's direction, and being...uhh, you?"

Hm. I actually let a small smirk twitch at my lips at that one. It seemed to be the spark some of them needed, as a few looks of realization appeared on their faces.

"You were provoking her!"

Sona blinked in surprise at that, and the smirk became a full on grin. "That's right. That was part of it, but that's not how I cheated. What else do you have?"

At this point, a look of concentration appeared on their faces, as they went back over the game they had watched. Sona's eyes were wide, and puzzled, as if she couldn't understand what was happening in front of her.

"Halfway through the game, Shitori-san started hesitating!"

Said person frowned at the reminder, but I kept the same smile on my face, as I nodded. Though none of them would know the why, they had seen the effects of Kurama's presence for themselves. He'd kept it to a minimum, and Sona was the only one who had felt it, but it had been more than enough to serve my purposes. More of an unintended side effect, actually.

"She got distracted! And uh, so did I, I guess. I was too busy wondering what had happened..."

Humming a little bit, I gave them a few more moments to come up with anything else, though i didn't expect them too. If they'd been paying attention, they'd have already spoken up.

"Correct. I rattled her, shook her focus and all of yours. You were all so distracted, none of you saw me outright moving pieces on the board. Miss Shitori here was so out of it, she wasn't even able to keep track of where pieces had been beforehand. It was as simple as that."

Simple sleight of hand. If there are no clear opportunities to allow you to cheat, the answer is obvious.

Make your own damn opportunities.

No doubt, there was more to it. I had years of practice with this kind of thing after all, and knew how to move in just the right ways to avoid drawing attention. The distraction had also been the result of a slow buildup, small stressors piling up over time and throwing my opponent off her game. This had created multiple opportunities in the long run to manipulate the board to my liking, once more in small, minor ways that had slowly built up.

Of course, even that wouldn't have helped me win, if I hadn't had Kurama dig up that memory of my first game against Shika for me. Shogi and Chess weren't exactly alike, but I'd been able to adapt that last winning gambit Shikamaru had used for my own use here.

"You can't be serious! It couldn't have been that simple!" Though Sona didn't raise her voice, her disbelief was evident.

For her, I had two simple words.

So I smiled and said, "Believe it."

A few minutes later, the bell rang and the students began to file out. Before long, the only one's left in the room were myself and Sona, who was staring intently at me.

"You cheated." A statement, the implications within clear.

I nodded. "I did."

Sighing, she slumped back into her chair. "I'd go on about how that goes against the spirit of our agreement, but..."

"The bet was to see whoever wins. I never stated how either of had to win."

"Indeed."

So, she'd noticed that on her own. Perhaps it was underhanded and unfair, but...

"Why?" She asked, defeated. To her, it was clear. I'd won, she'd lost. There was nothing more to it. Really, there was just one question. A simple question. One with a very complicated answer. After all, she wasn't asking why I had cheated. The answer was obvious, there. No, she was asking something else entirely.

Why had I even given her a chance, when it was clear I'd never let her win?

"Why else? To teach you something. It's what I do, after all."

Her nose scrunched up in thought, as she tried to figure it out. "And what kind of lesson is that, exactly?"

Smirking, I pulled out another cigarette and lit it up, as I answered. "From the moment you walked into the room, I could tell what kind of person you are."

Raising her brow at both the comment and the seemingly sudden shift in topic, she said, "Oh?"

Looking out through the window as I let out a puff of smoke, my gaze was distant. I could see the sun, bright and shining up in the clear sky, shedding light down onto the mountain and forest that surrounded the town. It really was quite serene, and the outskirts brimmed with unseen energy. Meditation came quite easily, though as easily as in the Elemental nations.

"Everything needs to be in order, for you. All straight lines, and tidy structures and surfaces. Organized. Efficient." I paused, before continuing, "Predictable."

Slowly, she nodded, accepting my observations as the truth, because they were. Someone like her would be well aware of her own nature.

"The problem is, life isn't like that. Nothing is, really. It's hectic, and chaotic, and you'll never see everything it throws at you coming. The world is a bit of a bitch like that." Quite literally, in the Elemental Nations' case.

Fucking Kaguya.

"And while order and forethought and all that jazz has it's place, you can't expect that to always work. People don't play fair, because life isn't fair. I get the feeling you already kind of know that, so I won't go into it, but the point is this." Turning from the window, I looked her straight in the eyes, and said, "When things aren't going your way, and it doesn't seem like they ever will...when you don't ever have the opportunity to make a comeback, or you're just on the outright verge of losing, the only real thing you can do is simple. Just one little concept you always need to keep in mind. When the rules of the game aren't in your favor?"

I smiled.

"Change them."

There was silence, as she absorbed what I said. Most likely, she'd have learned this herself down the line. She was a smart kid, after all. Hell, for all I knew, she probably already had. But if she had...she needed a reminder. I could tell. There were a lot of similarities between her and Shikamaru, on an intellect level, but there was one difference. One thing that kept her from being just as good.

That cunning...the trickery and planning that Shika could weave together was a scary thing. He wasn't like me, or Sasuke, or Neji or any number of other ninja I could name. Shika wasn't a powerhouse. Far from it. Despite that, though, he was one of the most dangerous people I knew, because he used what he had so well.

And when it came to battle? He didn't play fair, either.

Eventually, she sighed, and began to rise from her chair. "I will keep that in mind then, I suppose." As she made it to the door, she paused and said, "Thank you, Mr. Uzumaki."

Then she left.

Inhaling deeply, I leaned back in my chair and closed my eyes, exhaling deeply.

I'd been so nostalgic, lately. Maybe I was just seeing what I wanted to see, but after years of tedious boredom, things were getting interesting. These kids just reminded me so much of people back home, for some reason. And I could see it. That spark of potential, just waiting to be brought to life, and explode into a beautiful, raging bonfire.

I paused.

Then I snorted, because that thought was just so Gai. 'Fanning the Flames of Youth' indeed. The thought was so sudden, and so out of left field I couldn't help but laugh. I laughed long and hard, until I began to buckle over and tears began to stream down my eyes.

Because I finally had my answer. My answer to a question I hadn't even realized I'd been asking myself these last few years. Hadn't I thought this to myself just a few weeks ago? Had I not been mentally complaining for nearly a year now about this same subject? How had I not realized it before? Oh, and it was all the sweeter, as my own words just a few short minutes ago came back to haunt me.

If I was so bored these past few years, so unsatisfied with how things were going...why didn't I do something to alleviate that? Why hadn't I shaken things up? Why had I just kept coasting along, waiting for things to change on their own?

Why hadn't I changed the rules of the game?

Before too long, my fit of laughter came to a stop and I stood up from my seat. Wiping the the few tears from my eyes, I didn't even bother to blink when the door to my classroom was slammed open.

"Uzumaki-Sensei, please teach me!"

And when Hyoudou Issei barged his way into my empty classroom and made his request, all I could do was widen my already large grin and say one thing.

"Okay."

A/N: This is about all I have left of what's pre-written. Well, half of chapter 3 is done, but I have no idea when that will be finished, as I've been writing this when I have the time and energy, while adjusting to my new job.