Author's notes:

The Alternative Universe fantasy/romance "I Dream of Paddy" begins as an homage to the 1960s United States TV show "I Dream of Jeannie." Events take a Mentalist twist though. Are Patrick Jane and Teresa Lisbon a modern Jeannie and Major Nelson? You decide.

Thank you to great writers and friends Sue Shay and make-mine-a-kiaora for their read-throughs and the opportunity to learn from them. I've favorited both of them in my profile and encourage you to read their stories.

I do not own the TV show The Mentalist or I Dream of Jeannie and get no compensation from it. This story is written purely for entertainment purposes only.

Chapter 1: Some Beach

"Son of a…" Major Teresa Lisbon couldn't even complete her thought amid the whirl of chaos.

"Lisbon, what's wrong?" asked Grace Van Pelt back at mission control.

Perspiration beading on her brow, Teresa stared in disbelief as one warning light after another flashed red.

"Everything."

How could I have come so far only to have everything fail now? she thought.

Fate was so cruel. Her whole mission had gone against the odds. Fighting one mishap after another since launch two weeks ago, Teresa guided her spacecraft, SD-1, on a solo mission across the void to the comet Volker 516. Once there, she had planted an explosive charge on its surface. Detonating it as she sped away, the path of the comet veered ever-so-slightly in space terms. In human terms, the story differed though. Instead of hitting Earth, Volker 516 would miss it by 27 million kilometers.

With Teresa now a global hero, SD-1 hurtled home. That's when trouble began anew. Once back within the gravitational pull of the Earth, the same electrical problems that plagued her spaceflight when SD-1 first launched returned. Her navigation system blinked on-and-off, life support sputtered, and her final rocket burn shut down a fraction of a second too soon. Any of those three problems would imperil a space flight, but taken together they spelled one word - doom.

Even though I won't make it home, at least I steered the comet away from it, she thought.

"Grace, I'm losing consciousness."

"Don't say that, Teresa. We're doing everything we can. We'll find a way to get you back. Hang in with us." Grace shouted her words at her friend.

Teresa's eyes began to blur, but before she did she pressed one more button.

"I just reset the guidance system, but I doubt that will help. Don't worry, Grace. I'm at peace with what happens to me. At least the world is safe now. Tell my family and friends that I love and cherish them all. Goodbye, Grace."

"No, Teresa, no, no. Don't give up. You've got to keep…"

Grace's words faded into the background and Teresa's last thoughts focused on those she'd leave behind.

Teresa awoke with a start. Where was she? Casting a glance around her, she found that she was still tethered into her seat on SD-1. Immediately she ran through her procedure to check out the spacecraft's systems. What she found depressed her. The main systems, the back-ups - everything in the SD-1 was dead. No matter how many times she ran through the start-up process, nothing worked. Even hitting the control console with her open palm only resulted in a sting to her hand. While she had somehow made it back to earth, she was lost and alone on terra firma with no way to contact anyone.

With nothing else to do inside SD-1, her thoughts shifted. Peering through a window, she saw a sandy beach outside. Beyond that, ocean waves washed back and forth along the shore. Birds flew overhead, and the brilliant yellow sun lit up a bright blue sky dotted with puffy white clouds. Unstrapping herself, Teresa twisted the lock on the cabin door and shoved it open. Salty sea air overwhelmed her at first. When she poked her head outside though, the warm sunshine on her face renewed her. Fortified by curiosity if not hope, she hopped out of SD-1 and began a trek to see where she had landed.

Twenty minutes later, Teresa had her answer - an island barely bigger than a football field.

No radio, no food, no hope, she thought.

After she retrieved her backpack from the spacecraft, Teresa took a seat on a rock along the shore. How had fate taken such a nasty turn against her again? She would become a latter day Amelia Earhart, someone who disappeared without a trace. Maybe in hundreds of years someone would come across her remains and piece the story together. But what difference would that make?

She glanced at what surrounded her. Sea shells littered the beach, in the distance sea gulls flitted above the waves, and a gentle breeze jostled leaves in the trees beyond the shoreline. She took a deep breath. At least now she could inhale the freshness of sea air instead of the stale atmosphere of her cabin on SD-1. Invigorated, Teresa decided to take another stroll along the beach. Yanking off her boots, she let her toes sink into the wet sand as she made her way along. The surf waxed and waned as it wetted her feet then retreated back to the sea.

Ahead of her, sunshine reflected on something. Squinting, she saw a metal object half-buried in the sand. Every few seconds the surf surged over it then moved away.

When Teresa made her way over to the object, she bent down to inspect it. Brushing clumps of wet sand off its sides, she lifted it up. What she found was the last thing she'd expect on a desert island - a teapot.

"Well, Mr. Teapot. Fancy meeting you here. A cup of tea would be nice right now. If I only had fresh water. And a fire. And some tea bags. Oh how I wish my luck would change."

Letting her mind drift to happier times, Teresa absent-mindedly rubbed the side of the teapot. Inside something vibrated. The shock of what she felt made Teresa toss the teapot to the ground in front of her. A wisp of blue mist rose from its spout, causing her to take a step back.

At first the mist rose in a haphazard manner. Then it began to swirl into a tight cloud. Soon the cloud congealed into a shape.

With a poof, the mist changed to human form. A man. The handsomest man that Teresa had ever seen. Dressed in flowing white silk garments that hung loosely off his well-sculpted frame, he stood barefoot in the sand. Blond curls of hair accented a pair of blue-green eyes that crinkled in the bright sunlight.

The man looked around him with a sense of wonder. Then he turned his attention to Teresa. A smile broke across his face as he gawked at her, and she felt his eyes scan every inch of her body. When their eyes met, the man's expression changed from ecstatic to serious. He dropped to his knees and lowered his head.

"Yaggu berga imato kago uffta."

Teresa couldn't understand a word he said.

"Who are you?"

"Yaggu berga imato kago uffta."

"What did you say?"

The man raised his eyes and met hers again. She could sense his dire need to communicate with her. He cleared his throat before speaking this time.

"Yaggu berga imato kago uffta."

Teresa shook her head.

"I can't understand you."

The man stood up. Taking a step he placed himself next to her, face to face. A clean, cologne-like smell from his body tickled Teresa's nose. Leaning toward her, he placed his hand under her chin.

And he kissed Teresa like no man had ever kissed her before.

Teresa dropped her backpack behind her and surrendered to his lips.

To be continued

Author's notes:

Thank you for reading the story, and I'd love to hear from you.

Written by Rory Lee Feek and Paul Overstreet, Blake Shelton recorded "Some Beach" for the album Blake Shelton's Bar & Grill. The song title and lyrics are an English language play-on-words for the phrase that Teresa Lisbon didn't complete at the start of the chapter. Want to find out more about the songs used as chapter titles? Check out my Twitter account - "TheCRRelic"

Up next: "Rescue Me"