Those who were there, in that brief moment, could have sworn that the trainwreck had moved.

"Say cheese!" Haku said, the camera in his hands snapping a series of photographs as a bulb flashed. "Alright, there we go."

Naruto relaxed his face, the infant in his arms cradled lovingly. He looked beside him, and saw Tayuya looking down at their younger child with a soft smile on her face. They weren't even a year and a half old yet, just over fifteen months, and today was the second anniversary of the Battle of Amegakure. At least, that was the official name for it among the civilians, who had no explanation for the natural disasters that had taken place in the shell-shocked city-state. The ninja who'd fought that day referred to the one-day war as Tarmon Gai'don, which meant, "Last Battle," in the lost language of the Jie's ancestors. Tenten had been the first to use it, and the phrase had caught on.

The elder Rei and Kouga looked between their infant counterparts and their parents, matching smiles on their faces; while Rei's Rinnegan matched her father's, Kouga's eyes had lost their pupils and began radiating with a soft blue light. It was the Tenseigan, a trait that he had shared with Shikamaru ever since the Nara had become a demon, and then gained holy power through his murder of Nyarlathotep.

"Thanks, Haku." Naruto said. "Sorry for bothering you with it. How's Yugito?"

"Good...but she's kept me busy."

"I know what that's code for." Oboro laughed, standing above the rest of her family. "Don't tell me you're onto a third already?"

"I feel like she's competing with Mei, sometimes. I'm glad for her, and glad to be with her, but..."

"Yeah, I'll bet you are." Tayuya snorted.

"Fire and ice, as the saying goes?"

Haku laughed at that.

"That's one way to put it. You know, I wouldn't trade her for the world." He said, a smile gracing his face.

"Did you hear that Kankuro found a couple survivors of Suna's massacre, out in the desert?" Naruto asked. "You remember Taiso Renji from the Chunin Exams, right? Sasuke beat him for the championship, and there was a little boy with him."

"Don't tell me...the 'Banchou?' What was his name, Hiiro?" Tayuya asked. "He survived?"

"Apparently, he has a knack for riding Shai-Hulud. Never would have guessed."

Nobody else would have, either. More surprising than their survival of Pein's sacking of Sunagakure was the fact that, for more than two years, they had lived in the desert with no shelter or resources; left to their own devices, they had carved out a living.

"Any luck with Kumo or Iwa?" Haku asked, wondering.

Naruto just closed his eyes and shook his head, because there was nothing else he could say about that. Itachi was relatively unrepentant over the part he'd played in annihilating those villages off the map, but what could anybody do about it? He was one of the most powerful ninja on earth.

"Another day, another cause for joy. The sun is shining, the birds are singing...what's not to love?" Haku asked. "It's been a while since we've all been together, hasn't it? We should celebrate with everybody, all together."

"Same as last year? We can do that, I think." Tayuya said. "Hanabi and Konohamaru like excuses to watch after the twins."

"Hard to believe it's been two years." Shikamaru said, staring at the newest memorial stone of Training Ground Seven.

Larger than the previous three, it held the name of every ninja who'd fallen at Tarmon Gai'don, as well as the events preceding it. In particular, his eyes were drawn to the middle of the alphabet, where his mother's name sat. Near to it was Zabuza's name, which was no doubt the focus of Haku's attention. Also engraved were the names of the Sannin, Kakashi, Higurashi, and Nagato.

The Rookie Twelve, along with the Sabaku siblings, the Sound Three, Darui, Yugito, Kurotsuchi, Mei, and Sai, were all gathered together...minus Naruto, Tayuya, and their family.

"Hard to believe it's only been two years." Darui said. "Feels like we're a lifetime away from that day. So much happened, so many people died...and the world feels different. With all the ninja in the world consolidated into two cities, on friendly terms with one another, nobody is on edge. We still practice our jutsu, but the entire concept of shinobi is for utilization in combat. Without war, what purpose do we serve?"

"Maybe it's better to let those techniques die out, then. In a peaceful world, there's no need for ninja." Sasuke said.

"You all sound like old philosophers." Shino noted.

"G'g'g'd." Ino nodded her head in agreement.

"Geez, why are you all worrying about what comes next? Just appreciate what we have, because we have it! It's there to be enjoyed!" Kiba said, his tree trunk of an arm curling around Ino's waist.

"That may be so," Sai began, Hinata standing next to him, "but it's not that simple. We were born, bred, and raised to be killing machines. What happens when a tool has no wielder, and beyond that, no purpose? On top of it all, Taicho's constant presence has given more than one of us some permanent complications regarding bloodlust...like the low-level demonic radiation is slowly converting all of us into demons, the same way he was."

A light breeze passed them by, and Kurotsuchi looked up to the clouds. Far to the north, her ancestral home was nothing but rubble and ruins. No matter how long it had been, that would always hurt. She'd traveled back, after Tarmon Gai'don was over with, and had hardly walked through the gate before turning around and leaving; nothing but pain waited for her, there, in the halls of the mountain kings.

"I'm not sure I'd want things to go back to the way they were, though." Temari said. "At least, like this, we're free to live how we want to."

"Yeah, sure, but I'm not going to stop improving my technique." Suigetsu grinned, his back to the field's exit.

"Good." Naruto's voice came from behind the water demon, spooking him into a jump. "Because you're a demon, and I'm going to need that strength on my side, some day."

"What?" Karin asked.

Haku, Tayuya, and the elder Uzumaki twins all stood with the hero of their war against the gods.

"You can feel it, can't you? All of you? There's a never-ending pressure in your blood, and it's driving you towards violence. A march that never ends, a song that's never played...and it torments you, doesn't it?"

"Where are you going with this?" Shino asked.

"Years from now, I'll have left this world behind, but not in death. I won't force any of you to come with me, but I'd hate to leave you behind. Just because we saved this world, our world, doesn't mean that others don't need our help. An Antal Dara from another world crossed the border into ours after Madara killed the original one. For the rest of eternity, I'll lead a crusade against the gods."

"You just don't know how to rest on your laurels, huh?" Yugito laughed. "Now that you've saved the world, and brought peace to it, you're going to go off to fight all over again?"

"I'm in." Suigetsu said with a smirk. "All I know how to do is swing my sword, and if I follow you, then that's all I'll need to do. Best boss I could have asked for!"

"D'g'g'd't." Ino smiled, looking up to Kiba's burly form and nodding.

"Yeah, yeah. You know better than to think that I'll let you leave me in the dust, Naruto!" The Inuzuka said. Pointedly, he had ignored the names of his mother and sister on the memorial stone. He knew by now, that particular wound would never close.

"You took up the Sandaime's torch after all." Itachi appeared through the use of the Kamui, with Izumi at his side. "I still owe you a debt, Lord Hokage. For saving my brother's life...lead on."

Naruto raised an eyebrow at the Uchiha's sudden appearance, their matching Rinnegan separated by thin strands of fate.

"None of you have to make a decision now. None of you should make a decision now. I just want you all to know that I've made up my mind on what comes next. I...I wish I could relax and just enjoy it, but I can't. I lost that privilege."

"You haven't lost anything, father." Kouga said, putting a hand on Naruto's shoulder.

"Maybe a little ego, but that's all." Rei agreed.

"You should know by now, none of us are going to be okay with you just leaving us all behind." Tenten said. "Not me, not Neji or Lee...nobody."

"She's right." Hulasikali Wala agreed.

"Yosh! A brand new adventure! I can't wait!" The only thing that kept Lee from jumping in joy were the steady hands of his more-reserved teammates.

"Count on me being there." Darui said.

"Yeah, yeah, I get it." Naruto couldn't help the grin that crept up on his face. "Twenty-five years. Enough to watch our children grow strong, and be sure that they'll find a way in this world. Now, anyway...Golden Dragon?"

That was it, the restaurant that the Rookie Twelve and Tayuya had eaten at after the mission that had taken Naruto all the way to the Valley of the End, four years ago. It had been rebuilt, and remained as much a staple of Konoha's fine dining as it was before Konan had annihilated the village. The assembled ninja all agreed readily, since that restaurant had become their gathering point for large outings as a group.

That didn't mean that Naruto wouldn't sneak off to indulge himself with some ramen from the Ichiraku family's stand. Despite the vast amounts of money that Naruto had thrown in their direction over the last decade and a half, the father-daughter pair had never sought to go beyond their humble working conditions. For whatever reason, ever since Tarmon Gai'don, the noodle soup had tasted better than before. Whether it was simply the fact that he was able to have it again, after going so long without, or if demons inherently craved salt for their diets, was a mystery...still, he had made Kurama a promise, and even if the Kyuubi wasn't alive to hold him to it any longer? He didn't go back on his word.

For a brief moment, Naruto thought he could hear a deep rumbling in the back of his mind that resembled his consumed inner demon's laughter...but no, it couldn't be. Right? Of course not. Even Naruto couldn't believe that.

One by one, the group walked off, leaving Naruto to stare at the veritable wall of names that had been carved into his mind. Each one of the men and women who'd had the misfortune to get their name left on that slab of metal would, forever, have their blood on his hands. They had gone willingly, fought for their own reasons...but even so, they had died because he had ordered them to their deaths. Though he'd never been much of an academic, he'd taken to making an attempt to memorize every single name on the alphabetized list in front of him.

He was almost to the end of clan names that started with "B."

When he left his world behind, he determined, he would carry the thoughts of the dead with him. A memory of times gone by, to carry into the days and years ahead.

"You've kept me waiting, Naruto." Orochimaru's sinister voice emanated from his underground home, alone in Hi no Kuni except for his visitor. "How did you know where to find me? Or was it just a lucky guess?"

"I came for my father." Naruto growled through gritted teeth. "Not the one who brought me into this world...the one who left it before he could see me again."

Ninja don't get marked graves, he'd told his sister, when they'd been forced to leave Higurashi's still-warm corpse behind. The echo of those words had haunted him ever since.

"Awfully sentimental of you, for a demon whose only love is whatever battlefield he stands on."

"As though you would understand anything about sentiment." Naruto countered. "We could both teach you a lot about that."

"Both?" Orochimaru asked, before watching Tayuya step out of the darkness.

"I've come for my throne." The redhead said flatly, without any trace of malice or worry in her voice. In fact, she almost seemed...bored.

"You'll have to forgive me. The same way you needed my flesh and blood for your experiments, on your path to immortality, I need your invincible body."

Deep within Tayuya's mind, inside of the seal that kept the demon turtle Isobu confined within her body, she felt something pull at her consciousness; it was the last of Jiraiya's chakra, left as an imprint after he'd finished saving her life by turning her into a Jinchuriki. Bit by bit, it left her body, flowing out across the room until it struck Orochimaru where he stood.

"Wha-" The White Snake began to ask, but the seal activated by Jiraiya's last breath had frozen him in place.

"In the old days, before the gods died...my original self fused with Yggdrasil, the World Tree, to keep his brother, Antal Dara, from accessing his full might. Yggdrasil's trunk and branches acted as pathways to other worlds, and it was destroyed when the Juubi took it for his own. Only a single seed survived, which allowed the second Antal Dara to invade our world, and he nearly succeeded in breaking it."

Naruto held a shining blue sphere aloft, the same one that had imprisoned his children and his grandmother within its depths. The Gate had found its way to Uzushiogakure, possibly as a way for the deceased boundary god to mock his elder brother's family. Now, though, it would fulfill its purpose, and it would act as the Key. Orochimaru was frozen, unable to move or speak as he looked on in horror. With no remorse, Naruto shoved the gem-like orb inside Orochimaru's mouth.

"Your indestructible body will allow the new World Tree to become unbreakable. You won't die...I don't think...but you'll be trapped forever in this place. Paralyzed, rooted to the ground, unable to die. I wonder, Orochimaru, how long will it take for you to break? Not that you're sane in the first place, but you're not insane, either. Yet. The trunk and roots will grow around you, and time will pass you by."

"As long as the sun still rises, you'll be stuck." Tayuya added. "We thought for a long time about what way of killing you would be best. It took him some convincing, but I like this idea better. Sure, I won't get to watch your dead body go cold in front of me, but you'll be going through as much suffering as you made us endure. You brought this on yourself."

"Your strength will live on, inside of the World Tree. Right now, it's draining your chakra to power its growth, and it will keep taking more chakra as time goes by. Sounds like something you did to me, funnily enough."

The grin on Naruto's face was as vindictive as they came, filled with practically nothing but the feeling of revenge. Tayuya, however, showed nothing but passive judgement. Did she truly feel nothing? Had her time in Naruto's company truly desensitized her to the magnitude of the punishment that they were doling out?

Of course not, but she wasn't going to give Orochimaru the satisfaction of her reactions. She wanted him to be tormented, for all eternity, in an attempt to guess what she'd been thinking in that moment.

"We'll be seeing you soon enough." Naruto said, before the Uzumaki husband and wife turned around and left the paralyzed White Snake to his fate as an immortal. They went to gather Jie Higurashi's long-undisturbed armor and skeletal remains, to bring him back home and bury him. It was what he deserved.

They had lives to return to. People to visit, children to look after, a village to run; their day was jam-packed, and they'd taken the time out of it to visit Orochimaru. Given their status as soldiers on the winning side of the Battle of Amegakure, some might have said that he should've thanked them for coming. As it stood, however, the pleasure had been theirs. Deep within that base, over the next two and a half decades, a new World Tree would sprout and grow, allowing Naruto to reach across space and time to begin his eternal war against the gods who'd plagued his world...but that was for another day, and another time. Plenty of things would happen in the interim. A quarter-century, after all, was a long time...but in a world that would never again know the peril of war, now that the wheel of ages had rent itself in twain, it was little more than a drop in a chronology-filled bucket.

He had twenty-five years to plan for his conquest, and to enjoy the fruits of his labors in the meantime. For some unexplained reason, before they reached the age of thirty, each of the young adults who'd fought in Tarmon Gai'don had ceased to physically progress beyond their peak. Even the members of older generations, like Mei, Yugito, and Oboro, seemed otherworldly with their unfading beauty.

When the day finally came, after the World Tree had grown enough to allow for a link between worlds, Naruto and his small army of allies stood before it. Shimmering in the light, radiating with every color of the rainbow, it was the definition of beauty; one by one, and yet all at once, they left their world behind with smiles on their faces. To the youngest iterations of Rei and Kouga, who had watched with some mixture of shock, awe, and dismay, they felt like they had been robbed of everything they'd ever known. And yet, pinned to Yggdrasil with a single tri-pronged kunai, was a note left by their father.

To Kouga and Rei,

I know that you're aware of how quiet I've been, every time you talk about your future, in this world I fought to build for you. You know how much I love you, even if I haven't always been the best at showing it. Believe me, I've done my best to show it. When you find this, after your mother and I are gone, (and your older siblings, and all your aunts and uncles, even if they aren't related to you by blood,) I know you'll probably be hurt and confused, because you think that I'm not coming back. Don't worry about that! You think your mother would let me live if we never came to visit you? Think of this as...our vacation. A very long vacation. It wouldn't be a vacation if we didn't come back, though! I raised you both. I've watched you grow into adults that I'm proud to call my children. The time has come, though, for me to leave. I wanted to make a world without war, and a world without hate, so that you could grow up without having to follow down your parents' footsteps. That's the last thing we need from you two, no matter how good you'd be at it. I realized after we won, though...a world without war means a world without warriors. A world without me. This is my home, the only home I've known, and I'll never forget the wonderful life I have waiting for me when I come back. If you ever need me, use this kunai, and I'll come back as soon as I can. Live your lives, in the meantime! Enjoy everything this world has to offer! Don't forget, though...we love you!

See you soon,

Dad (& Mom, even though she doesn't know I'm writing this.)

P.S.: Your mom left some lasagna in the fridge.

P.P.S.: I may, or may not, have eaten some of it. Went to Ichiraku instead of finishing the rest of your food. Which reminds me, you'll need to yell at that old geezer Teuchi to retire. If it's up to him, he'll work himself to the bone, up until the second he dies. Don't let him do that. If I come back and find out you let him do that, you're grounded. I don't care how old you are.

Helpless, the twins shared a look with one another, but matching smiles were on their faces as the same thought passed through their minds.

Yep.

Naruto had definitely written that.