Confessions

A.N.: Drabble prompt by Anonymous on tumblr; 45. "Tell me a secret."

"Tell me a secret.", she whispers to him late at night as a clock in the back of her head counts down the days - hours, minutes, seconds - to when she enters the Arena, and she wants to forget about it.

Peeta looks at her and understands. "I broke my mother's vase when I was three. She still thinks it was only the wind."

"Tell me a secret.", he asks her, holds her hand. They're in the cave, their stomachs full for the first time since they've entered the Arena.

Katniss considers an answer. "I've always liked your eyes most.", she says and the reply works for more reasons than just one: it's the truth, and it helps her play the role.

Peeta smiles. "I've always liked your hair."

Katniss looks down, lets herself blush.

"Tell me a secret."

Peeta looks at Katniss - dressed in clothes that cost more than someone in District 12 would ever earn in fifteen lifetimes - and even though there's a smile on her lips, her eyes are dead. They have been like that since this tour started. They are like an empty shell, and she finds herself to be so gratefuly that he prefers her hair over her eyes. Her hair, though, is styled beautifully and even she admired it in the mirror for a full minute until bile rose in her throat once she remembered why she needed it styled in the first place.

"I know you lied.", he tells her. His eyes are dead, too (and Katniss' chest collides in on itself, her heart aches, because she has always liked his eyes the most and now they are only filled with pain), but so is his smile. He massages his metal leg with his hand, even if he can't feel the touch. He thinks he's finally gotten used to it.

Truth is, he hasn't.

Peeta hugs her, can feel her tense as she tries to hold her tears back. He knows her, though. He does. "Tell me a secret."

He knows what she'll say before she even thinks it.

"I'm terrified of going back."

"I'll tell you a secret.", Peeta says, his voice hoarse, still not feeling half his body the way he should. "When I died, my life flashed before my eyes, and the only memories I wanted to look at had you in them."

"Can you keep a secret?", she whispers on the other side of the glass and she knows he can't hear her, but this makes her feel normal. Helps her pretend that he's okay, that they didn't take him, that this was all just a dream. "I love you."

"Real or not real?", he starts and Katniss looks up at him. "We tell each other secrets."

Katniss smiles at him. "Real."

"Can I tell you a secret?", she takes his hand, a silent answer. "I love you."

Katniss kisses him, tears in her eyes. She whispers the words back.