ok I know it's been a while but I've been missing this story lately and it seems like at least a few people are still reading so I decided to update. It's kind of short compared to the other chapters because im testing the waters but if I post more they'll be longer I promise. As always, let me know what you think, I might be a tad rusty with this story so feedback is appreciated.

Rory

It's the end of class and I got a message from Lauren asking to meet up with her back at her dorm. So I gather my things and start to make my way towards her building. While I'm walking I feel a tap on my shoulder and I swivel my head to my right. A huge smile spreads across my face when I see that it's Amy. She doesn't look that happy though. Not mad or sad but maybe tired.

"Hey Amy what's up?"

Amy sighs and falls into step with me. "I was wondering if I could talk to you for a few minutes."

"Of course. I was actually headed to your dorm because Lauren wants to talk to me. We could all talk there?"

Amy rolled her eyes and pulled me to a stop next to a bench that was along the path. We both sat down and she said,

"that's actually what I want to talk to you about. I'm a little upset with Lauren and Karma right now. I'm not mad I just...it's a lot. I mean I can't be mad, right? Lauren's my sister and Karma's my best friend and they have all the best intentions and yet I just can't get over it, you know? A whole year this has been going on and I had no idea. I guess it just hurts. I wish one of them talked to me like they always force me to do. Yeah I still would've been upset but I'd deal with it. The worst part is that I know how much Lauren is struggling with this and I mean she has other things on her mind which I just can't even imagine. And,"

I cut her off. "Amy, honey, slow down. So you're talking about Lauren and Karma being together?"

"You knew?" Amy has more hurt showing on her face.

"I had suspicions but they didn't directly tell me until I walked in on a moment the other day. For what it's worth, they weren't ready for that moment."

"Why couldn't they just tell me without me forcing it out of them? I told them I'm not mad and in the end I was just so worried about Lauren I didn't want her to worry about me being mad. There's just too much for her to deal with. But I am hurt. It's similar to your situation with Beth I guess."

I shift in my seat and look the other way. In some ways Beth is always going to get to me. The pain from the way she used me is always going to be there.

"Except Karma didn't use you, right?"

"No, she tried to be careful of my feelings and ignored it as if she didn't know I liked her."

"Right well, maybe she didn't fully do it right but she had good intentions."

"Exactly that's what I'm saying. That's why it's hard to be mad. I just can't. I know they're not trying to hurt me. It's the opposite. They're doing everything they can to not hurt me. It's just taking me more time to fully accept it."

I put my arm around Amy and squeeze.

"I think you'll have plenty of time to adjust if that's what you're mostly worried about. They're not ready to be together. It's all very innocent right now. They haven't even kissed. Lauren needs time. She's scared."

"Yeah I know."

I rub my hand along Amy's arm and then stand up.

"Ok well I better get to Lauren since I had already told her I was on my way."

Amy nodded and I turned to continue towards Lauren.

Lauren

I'm sitting on my bed against the wall cradling my legs in my arms. I'm about to talk to Rory. She's on her way here and I'm going to tell her everything. Besides my parents, only Amy knows everything about me. Well, now she does. Karma is just missing one thing. It's a big thing though and I'm terrified of it.

I invited Rory over because I knew Karma was in class and I didn't want her to hear on accident. I'm not sure why I want to talk to Rory specifically. I think she has just opened up so much to me that I suppose it's only fair. I also feel close to her and I trust her. Something about her presence comforts me though I can't put my finger on what it is exactly.

I hear a knock at my door.

"Come in." I let my legs fall to the floor and I wait for Rory to walk in.

"Hey Lauren. Is everything ok?"

"I thought maybe we could talk. I've had a rough week I just thought maybe I could open up to you?"

Rory smiled and plopped down on the bed next to me.

"We'll it's about damn time. I'm all ears."

I chuckled but then just looked down at my hands and started playing with my fingers, linking them together and then pulling them apart.

Rory put her hand ontop of mine. "It's ok, Lauren you can tell me. So you and Karma huh?"

I sighed, shut my eyes then opened them slowly as I let out a breath.

"I mean yeah but that wasn't what I brought you here for. Well I suppose it is but not fully."

"I'm not sure what you mean."

I pulled my legs back up onto the bed and squeezed them under me. It made me just the right amount of uncomfortable that I felt grounded, if that makes any sense. I don't know, for me it just works, helps me to focus.

I took a deep breath and let it out slowly.

"Ok so I'm a little different."

Rory furrowed her brows but she didn't say anything so I continued.

"I was born intersex."

Rory's face seemed to relax.

"Oh. Ok so what does that mean for you?"

"I have CAIS which is Complete Androgen Insensitivity Syndrome. Basically, I have all the female parts but I don't produce any estrogen. I was born with male chromosomes so I have to take pills to put estrogen into my body."

Rory nodded her head and seemed to be taking in what I said, trying to handle the information with care.

"Does anyone else know?"

I bit my lip. "Only Amy."

"Karma doesn't know?"

I started to pick at a loose thread in my sweats and shook my head.

"Ok is that what you're worried about? How she'll react?"

I nodded my head and felt tears welling up in my eyes.

"I've come to terms with it myself and that's why Amy knows but it just seems like a completely different scenario to tell Karma. She looks at me very differently than Amy looks at me."

Rory scooted closer to me and put her legs up on the bed in a criss-crossed position to face me.

"Karma really cares about you. Do you think she's going to react badly?"

I thought about it for a moment. That was the thing, I wasn't sure. I like to think that it wouldn't matter but I don't think I can just expect that from someone.

"I hope not. There's more to think about with Karma because there's future things that I just can't give her, you know? So, what if she does react badly? What if that makes her change her mind?"

Rory's face was full of concern.

"I can't really say. There's no promises but I really don't think that she would want to be with you any less. It doesn't change who you are. You'll still be the same sassy Lauren who she fell for."

She tried for a smile and I returned a small one.

"Thank you. I'm not sure when I'm going to tell her, I just needed to get it out to another person who wasn't as biased as Amy but still knew both of us enough."

"Of course. You can talk to me about anything. Or I could just continue to ramble on about my life which I know you love. The mess that is my life can be entertaining from an outside perspective I suppose."

"It's not entertaining, I listen because I like to help if I can."

"I appreciate that. Maybe I should get going, give you some space to think? If there's anything you need or if you just want to talk don't hesitate to text me."

Rory stood up and I followed and before I could process what I was doing I pulled her into a tight hug. I got up on the tips of my toes and basically whimpered a thank you. She rubbed my back and then backed out of my room with a smile, closing the door behind her.

I felt like a large amount of weight was lifted off of my shoulders. Don't get me wrong, there was still a lot weighing me down but I did feel lighter. Now I just have to figure out what the best way to talk about it with Karma will be.