"You know you don't have to go through all this trouble with us, you might be needed in Asgard." The Captain once told him after a particularly failed attempt at locating Loki's scepter. "Besides," he added remorsefully "we were technically the ones who've lost it in the first place."
"It is fine, my friend, I am not needed elsewhere and I am glad to aid you in your search." Thor had given him a reassuring smile that masked the lie he had spoken.
He did not want to go back to Asgard. He couldn't, not after what happened in Svartalfheim. He wasn't given the time to grieve for his Loki then. Jane had tried to speak to him about it, though he had only brushed off the subject and insisted he was fine. He thought he was simply just numb. He thought his heart had grown too weary to mourn his brother for the second time, although his suppressed grief took a toll of him once he set foot on Asgard.
It seemed that it was the only time the floodgates were opened, his heart utterly exposed to all the pain and anguish he thought he had grown immune to. Every corner was plagued with the memory of his brother yet there was nothing present to remember him by, as if Loki was merely a ghost his mind had conjured. His brother's belongings have long been sent off in an empty coffin after his fall and even the things he used in his cell were cleared out.
It was ironic how Loki was still capable of hurting him even when he was no longer in his life anymore. It felt wrong to grieve for someone who had caused him so much pain, though they were still brothers whether Loki accepted that fact or not and the centuries of affection he had for him could not simply be banished because he wished them to be.
He did not have anyone to confide his turmoil to. Frigga was gone as well and Odin barely even spoke about his second son. Thor didn't think he could take it any longer and so he did the only thing he could; he chose to leave Asgard behind to reside in Midgard, setting his mind on retrieving the only thing Loki had left.
And now it is gone once more.
Ultron had made off with it while they were fighting Stark's automatons. By the time Thor managed to follow it, Ultron was already too far to catch.
He realized belatedly that he was stalking through the halls of Stark's tower, though he could barely see anything with the poor lighting and the glow of the mind gem engraved in his memory. He remembered Loki's eyes had flared he same shade before his breaths had failed him, lying in his arms and looking up at him with a mix of fear and regret.
The silence around him did little to soothe the disquiet of his mind but the sound of his footfalls was enough to provide him a moment of respite. His hand tightened around Mjolnir's hilt as he felt a sense of desperation pumping adrenaline into his bloodstream and the despondency that weighed him down suddenly dissipated into underlying anger for Stark.
Thor followed the voices ahead of him until they led him into the lab situated at the end of the hall. He noted that all the others were gathered in the room as he entered but before he realized what he was doing, he already had Stark by the neck.
The mortal still had the gall to let out a sheepish chuckle. "Woah there, uh use your words buddy."
"I have more than enough words to describe you Stark." Thor said, his voice a low, threatening growl and it was sheer effort that kept him from tightening his hold on the the Midgardian's throat.
A few startled cries erupted around them but it was The Captain who stepped forward to stop him. "Thor, I know he is an idiot but let's just talk this out." His tone was cordial, though there was no mistaking the command in his words.
Thor did as Rogers bid him to—albeit not kindly before striding towards the window. He couldn't bear to look at Tony in the eye. "This creature Ultron, you created it didn't you?"
"Uh, yeah, I think he might have mentioned that a few times." The mortal's tone still remained flippant and Thor had to heave a deep breath in order to keep himself from shouting.
"What does it want with the scepter then?"
"Well, I might have used the mind gem to make him."
Thor wished he had snapped the man's neck the moment he saw him. "Is this all a joke to you Stark?"
"Kind of?" Tony raised his hands defensively when the god of thunder turned around to glare at him. "Look, we're just having some minor issues here that's all, nothing me and Bruce here can't fix. If all else fails, we could just track it down and beat the shit out of it."
Dr. Banner however, seemed utterly unconvinced. His hands still hovered over the holographic images that depicted Jarvis' ruined system as he eyed Tony with something akin to disdain. "This is serious Tony, we've created a murder bot. We can't just simply beat the shit out of it."
Thor sighed and pressed his fingers against his temple in a hope to ward off the oncoming headache. "This could have been avoided if you hadn't meddled with the forces beyond your understanding."
"Okay, you out of all people wouldn't understand this. Anyone remember the hostile alien army that came charging through a hole in space?" Tony scanned the room with a look of incredulity and scoffed when none of them seem to agree. "How were you guys planning on beating that? I'm sorry if I caused any inconveniences for you because I'm trying to protect my planet."
His sardonic retort only grated at Thor's nerves. He walked towards Tony and grabbed him by the collar of his shirt, though this time it was more of a warning for him to shut up. "You've lost the scepter due to your carelessness."
Stark smacked his hand away. "And why do you care so much about the glow stick of destiny?"
"My brother is dead Stark. That scepter was the last thing I had left of him and you've lost it!" He knew it was childish the moment those words left his lips, though backtracking would only make it worse. Tony was already equipped with yet another witty remark but he was silenced by the Captain's glare. With that, Thor stormed out of the room without meeting anyone's gaze, lest of seeing the judgment in their expressions.
The Scarlett Witch was already standing behind Thor before he even sensed her presence, leaving his vision entangled with the red wisps of magic wafting from her fingertips. He blinked several times in attempt to clear his head but the witch's arcane had already taken a stubborn hold on his mind, making it seem as if he was trapped in a state between wakefulness and sleep.
"Thor! Status" Roger's voice crackled through the communication device Stark had given him and it was enough to stir Thor from his daze. He drew Mjolnir back over his head, poised and ready to strike at any on coming attacker but strangely there were no signs of Ultron's automatons and the only trace left of the Scarlett Witch was the remnants of her magic still heavy in the air.
"The girl tried to work my mind." He told the Captain as he ducked into a nearby antechamber. "Take special care, I doubt a human can keep her at bay-"
Whatever words he planned to say were lost to him when he saw a familiar shadow disappear around the corner. He managed to catch a glimpse of the cascade of raven hair and the pale face that was veiled underneath it. The figure had an air of gracefulness about him as he walked, leaving a trail of seidr at his wake.
"Loki!" Thor called out, his heartbeat matching the pace of his strides as he hastened to catch up to his lost brother.
The path that the figure disappeared to led him into a metal tunnel. Only the entrance was lighted by the hazy wall lamps while the rest of the way was doused in obscurity.
"Loki I only wish to speak with you brother, do not fear." He said when he heard the sound of the trickster's footsteps breaking into a run.
"Loki!" he called again, this time it resembled more like a plea. When his brother did not respond, Thor dragged in a heavy breath and closed his eyes before taking a plunge into the darkness.
The next instant Thor opened his eyes; he was no longer in the base of the Midgardian arms dealer. The echo of his footfalls were muffled as the metal flooring beneath him gave way to soil and the god of thunder suddenly found himself trekking through a sickeningly familiar land. Before him, the sky was an endless expanse of poison green, brushed with strokes of louring grey clouds.
There was no other place in the Nine Realms similar to this one.
He was in Svarftalheim.
"Thor," his name was barely spoken above a whisper but somehow the weak and ragged voice was able to break through the deafening roar of the wind against his ears. Thor spun around and allowed his eyes to wander around in search for its owner. His gaze fell on the crumpled form of his brother a few steps away from him.
Wordlessly, Thor let Mjolnir drop to the ground and lowered down to gather Loki into his arms. At first glance he only appeared to be sleeping with the look of serenity settled over his face but his skin was a stark shade of ashened white, his breaths were coming out in short gasps and his hands were desperately clutching at the gaping wound on his stomach.
Thor wrapped an arm around his shoulder and propped him up against him, his free hand taking a hold of the end of his cape so he can press it against the wound. Loki's eyes fluttered open at the movement and Thor felt as if he had completely been encased in the icy tinges of horror coursing through his veins. His brother was once again staring up at him with the look that has haunted the periphery of his vision ever since the dark world.
"I'm sorry," he managed to gasp, a rivulet of tears slipping from the corners of his eyes as he shut them again.
"Shh, it'll be alright Loki." Thor pulled him closer and guided his head towards his chest so he could listen to the steadiness of his heartbeat. "Breathe Loki, stay with me."
It was always his instinct, even when they were both still children, to swallow down his own fear and assure Loki the best he could whenever he got hurt. Now however, it appears he was out of touch. There was so much left unsaid between them and yet they were driven too far apart for Thor to even know where to start.
"How would it be alright?" Loki asked, although it lacked the biting edge that was normally present whenever he was addressing him. "You can't save me. There is nothing left of me to save."
"No, Loki listen to me do not give in." Thor took his hand away from the wound and cradled his head instead. He brushed a finger against his face to get his attention, painting his cheek with blood. "Loki please" I need you.
"I'm sorry," Loki told him one last time before his breaths evened out into nothing.
The world around him abruptly disappeared into a blinding white.
He was not in Svarftalheim anymore, he was leaning heavily against a wall of the weaponry base in Midgard yet all he could see was his brother's blood weaving across the floor.
They were strolling through the hallway of the newly re-established SHEILD base as Tony and the Captain Rogers engaged in a light-hearted banter regarding Mjolnir but Thor was too distraught by the idea of returning to Asgard to join them. As much as he dreaded the prospect, he couldn't simply stay in Midgard knowing that there were darker workings outside the Nine Realms. His father was the only one who had enough knowledge on the infinity gems to give him a deeper understanding on the events that recently transpired.
His comrades were there to see him off but as soon as they stepped out into the training grounds, Rogers said a quick goodbye to him and left, claiming that there were pressing matters that Fury needed to discuss with him immediately. Thor pretended not to notice the urging look he directed at Tony on his way back inside.
"So Thor," Stark drawled once the Captain was out of earshot. "Fair warning first, if there is anyone in the world who sucks at making apologies, it's me but Steve is probably gonna hunt me down if I don't apologize to you-"
"No need for that my friend," Thor cut him off before he began to rant. "You have my forgiveness, although I myself should apologize for my behavior towards you."
Tony only snorted and shook his head in disbelief. "Don't give me that. You didn't start this whole Ultron mess, you should still be guilt-tripping me and not yourself."
"Well that is all behind us now."Thor told him as they continued their saunter across the field. Judging by the furrow in the Midgardian's brow, there was an unspoken question in his mind. They both lapsed into a comfortable silence as Thor waited for him to bring up the subject.
"What happened to Reindeer Games anyway?"
The unexpected inquiry caused him to halt his pace in surprise. Tony took this as a sign of discomfort and quickly deemed it to be an unwelcome topic. "Hey, you don't have to tell me if you're not comfortable with it."
"It's fine. It's just that you are the first one to as about my brother." He sighed and ran a hand over his face as he recalled the Scarlett Witch vision.c
"Loki died saving me," he added after a moment, his voice dwindling into a hoarse whisper. "It was my fault, I led my little brother into danger and I couldn't do anything but watch him die."
"Wow that kinda sucks. It would probably be more convenient if the power to bring back the dead came with the godly abilities package."
Thor smiled at Stark's attempt to lighten the mood. "Yes, it would be helpful," he remarked absently, his eyes fixed on a distant point in the field.
"Look on the bright side," Tony continued. "At least you know that there is still some good left in him."
Thor's smile turned into a wistful one as he considered the idea of Loki being better off dead. At least he was no longer remembered as the disgraced prince who brought destruction over Midgard but instead as a warrior who helped save the Nine Realms from Malakeith's reign.
"Don't you find it strange for me to grieve for someone who had caused so much devastation to your realm?"
"It's normal to miss your brother Thor, no matter how much of a pompous ass he could be. No offense." Tony jokingly gave him the palm-up gesture of surrender just in case.
Thor placed a hand on his shoulder instead with a lack of a better response. "I am truly going to miss these little talks of ours."
"Not if you don't leave," Tony pointed out hopefully.
"I'm afraid I have no choice. The mind gem is the fourth infinity stone to show up in the last few years. This can't be a coincidence."
"So you think you can find out what it is back in fairyland?"
"Yes, I do. Besides you," Thor playfully clapped him in the chest, "there is nothing that can't be explained. Until then my friend." He angled Mjolnir towards the sky and offered the mortal one last smile before the light of the Bifrost fully encompassed him and sent him to the realm eternal.
The brief conversation he had with Tony had changed his perspective; he just hoped it would be enough to turn the tragic memories of Asgard into fond ones.
This is my first work in this fandom but it's been a while since i've written anything so I still feel a bit rusty. This story is purely self-indulgent, so there might be a few plot holes.
Thank you for reading! Feedback would very much be appreciated.