I do not own either One Piece or anything by Tolkien.

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Beta read by Thisisarealtagwhy, make sure to check out his own crossover!

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One Hat to Rule them All

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Chapter 7: The Silmarillion

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"Garp," Coby the Hobbit nervously asked the wizard as they walked through Rivendell, "can you tell me about Pirate King Luffy, and…this." He held up the Straw Hat, the fearsome object for which Sengoku, ruler of this Navy fortress and city, was gathering marines from all corners to discuss strategy with. The Straw Hat had to be destroyed to ensure the Pirate King's demise, but they needed a solid plan to do so.

For his part, Garp the Grey groaned in frustration. He did not want to give a snot-nosed brat a lecture. But it would be unfair to not tell Coby something about the Hat, especially since ignorance had led the pink-haired lad to already put on the Straw Hat, nearly killing him in the process. Smoker had already chewed Garp out for that, respect or no, about how ignorant Coby and his manservant Helmeppo had been. With a sigh, Garp grudgingly conceded defeat. "I guess there really isn't too much known about the King of the Pirates, or you'd've just heard silly myths and stories about them." Then he perked up as he figured out a way to pass the buck. "Follow me!"

He led Coby to 'Senny's' personal library (getting mud on the carpet from his boots), and ruffled through the bookcase to find what he wanted. Coby rushed to catch the ones Garp threw over his shoulder because they were in his way, until the venerable wizard finally found what he was looking for. "Here," he ordered as she shoved the thick tomb of a book into Coby's hands. "If you've got any questions, let me know."

Before he could make his escape however, Coby nervously exclaimed, "The whole thing!?" It really was a thick bundle of dead trees.

Taking pity, Garp snatched the history book back, and flipped through to near the end until he opened it up to a handy enough page, and thrust it all back. "This should do." With his sense of duty fulfilled, Garp plopped down into the nearest chair, and was asleep before Coby could stammer another word, pointedly and loudly snoring.

Stumbling a little under the weight, Coby got the book to a table and set it down. Taking a deep breath, he started to read it aloud, starting with the title of the book. "The Silmarillion."

"From that time war never ceased between Luffy and the Navy;" he spoke with awe, "and Eregion was laid waste, and Celebrimbor slain. In that time the stronghold and refuge of Imladris, that Men called Rivendell, was founded by Sengoku the Buddha; and long it endured. But Luffy had gathered into his hands the Straw Hat of Power; giving him the ability to influence all other peoples of Middle-earth, hoping thus to bring under his sway all those that desired secret power beyond of the measure of their kind. Seven cups of loyalty he gave to seven Monsters; but to Men he gave nine, for Men proved in this matter as in others the readiest to his will." Coby paused in concern at this and what it implied, but continued.

"And all those gifts he gave out he perverted, the more easily from the power of the Straw hat, and they were accursed, and they betrayed in the end all those that accepted them. The Monsters indeed proved tough and hard to tame; such creatures ill endure the domination of others, and the thoughts of their hearts are hard to fathom, nor can they be turned to shadows."

XXX

"But if I drink this stuff…" Luffy said, "…then I have to be the captain commander…of this big fleet, don't I?"

"Exzackly!" cried out Bartoloemo with his green hair and fiendish long fangs, renowned as 'the Cannibal.' "With an armada of 5,600 at yer beck and call, you'll be one of the greatest of pirates! After all, you're gonna be the Pirate King one day, Mistah Luffy! Even this ain't enough for you ta conquer the world with!"

But Luffy continued to glare at the seven inhuman figures before him.

"Why, Luffy?!" boomed Orlumbus, a massive figure far larger than a human. "How can this much power not be enough?! Even the strongest of men cannot match the power of numbers! There will come a time when you'll need us!"

"It'll cramp my style," scowled Luffy.

"Whaaat?! Why does he look so unhappy?!" gasped as one the seven offering their services.

"More importantly," Luffy changed tack, "are they getting ready for a party back there?"

"His attention has moved to food!"

"Enough nonsense," exclaimed Cavendish, who only appeared as a Man, but harboured within him the demon Hakuba. He rambled a bit, but finished with "Don't you see what it means that I will affiliate myself with you?!"

"Let's grab him and pour it down his throat," glowered Ideo with his explosive fists and long arms that had two joints apiece.

"You disrespectin' your followers' power?! You're gonna get it, saviour!" threatened Don Sai as he ominously hefted his gleaming spear. His body was weirdly portioned, and his foot could crack a continent.

"Listen," screamed Luffy, "I just wanna be the Pirate King, that's all! I've got no interest in being some poofty big shot!"

XXX

There was more however about the fate of those seven Monsters.

"They used their positions only for the getting of wealth; but wrath and an overmastering greed of gold were kindled in their hearts, of which evil enough after came to the profit of Luffy. It is said that the foundation of each of the Seven Kingdoms of Monsters of old was a small cup; but all those hoards long ago were plundered and the Neptunians devoured them, and of the Seven Cups some were lost to ocean floors and some Luffy recovered."

Coby shivered in thought of those fearsome beings the Dark Lord had seduced into his service.

XXX

"If I ever think we're in trouble," Luffy declared, "I'll shout for your help! Then you can come save us! I don't have to be a boss or a great lord, right?! If you're in trouble, call for us! We'll come and help you! I won't forget about how we fought Mingo together!"
"Okay…" Bartolomeo breathed out. "I think I know what you're sayin'. To Mistah Luffy, bein' the Pirate King…isn't some super important bigshot…but someone that's…free!?

"Why…I…" sobbed Bartolomeo. "I can't help but admire you all the more, Luffy sir!"

"Dee ga ga ga ga gag a!" laughed the giant Hajrudin. "Same here! Oi, Bartolomeo! Let's get things started! There's no need for him to swear his oath of protection to us anyways."

"You do have a point," smirked Cavendish.

"It's better if both sides just do what they feel is best," agreed Ideo.

"Something tells me you're not the type of guy to prevent another from exercising his free will," Sai grinned.

"Hm?" gasped Leo the Dwarf, the last of their number. "Actually, you're right!"

As one they reached for their seven cups of sake.

As one they swore their oaths of fealty to the future King of the Pirates.

(Zoro had already drained the cup that was meant for Luffy)

XXX

Steeling himself, Coby read more into the history of the owner of the Straw Hat.

"Men proved easier to ensnare. Those who accepted his gifts became mighty in their day, kings, sorcerers, and warriors of old. They obtained glory and great wealth, yet it turned to their undoing. They had, as it seemed, unending life, yet life became unendurable to them. They could walk, if they would, unseen by all eyes in this world beneath the sun, and they could see things in worlds invisible to mortal men; but too often they beheld only the phantoms and delusions of Luffy."

At this point Coby had to marshal himself again. He understood what the text was hinting at, for upon wearing the Straw Hat he had glimpsed the true forms of the Nazgûl beneath their cloaks; who and what they truly were. It was if they existed in a world parallel to this world, using those garments to hide their true nature from regular people. And what does that imply about what I saw about them? For with each moment Coby had gazed upon them, they could be either beings of beauty of wonder, figures that he could well envision as warriors and leaders of old. But then they would become horrific and alien, their wrath devouring any trace of humanity.

"And one by one, sooner or later, according to their native strength and to the good or evil of their wills in the beginning, they fell under the thraldom of the gifts they bore and under the domination of the Straw Hat, which was Luffy's. And they became for ever invisible save to him that wore the Straw Hat, and they entered into the realm of shadows. The Nazgûl were they, the Ringwraiths, the Enemy's most terrible servants; darkness went with them, and they cried with the voices of the dead."

XXX

"You idiot!" Nami screeched as she socked the Pirate King over his head. "Look at this mess!"

"Sorry, Nami," Luffy whimpered, lying on the ground admits a mess of beach supplies he had dropped when he had tripped, cradling his now aching head from her fist.

Happy to use their Captain as a scapegoat, Usopp and Chopper started to tip-toe away before the navigator turned her wrath upon them.

Robin giggled from beside her surrogate sister, both tanning themselves beneath the gorgeous sun, stunning in their bikinis. Circling around them scampered Sanji, shamelessly begging to apply sunscreen to them.

"Like they want your hands touching them," Zoro deadpanned.

"What was that!?" snarled Sanji, throwing a flaming kick at the swordsman.

Ignoring the habitual fight, Brook snatched the out of the air the bottle of sunscreen that had gone flying, and started applying the solution to his bones.
"Pass it over when you're finished?" Franky asked, grinning beneath his shades.

"Of course," Brook promised, while quietly planning his next musical composition. The way the sun was hitting the water, the plant-life around them, it was all tugging at his musical spirt, to the point that he could not even spare the time to ogle the ladies. First he had to apply sunscreen however, lest his skin burnt. Oh wait…Yo ho ho ho!
Grinning with contentment, Jinbe walked out of the water, dragging a massive fish that would serve for dinner, giving his own small chuckle at the sight of Nami now chasing after Luffy after he had said the wrong thing while trying to defend himself. Ah, this is the life!

XXX

"So that's it then," Coby declared aloud. "That's what Garp wanted me to understand. The enemy before us is insidious and sly, able to corrupt even the purest to his ambitions. Turning them into creatures of darkness, slaves to his barest whim. No matter what the cost, we must see to it that he is defeated at last, once and for all!"

With that fiery conviction in his mind, Coby stormed out of the library, determined to find a way to help contribute to the final downfall of the Dark Lord.

Back in the chair, Garp gave another ear-piercing snore.

XXX

Author Notes:

The 'history' parts are copied from the original Silmarillion, with my own adaptation. The power of the writing, even for something as relatively dry as this, really drives home to me what a master writer like Tolkien is capable of. Anywhere it seems weaker, is on me.

From that time war never ceased between Sauron and the Elves; and Eregion was laid waste, and Celebrimbor slain, and the doors of Moria were shut. In that time the stronghold and refuge of Imladris, that Men called Rivendell, was founded by Elrond Half-elven; and long it endured. But Sauron gathered into his hands all the remaining Rings of Power; and he dealt them out to the other peoples of Middle-earth, hoping thus to bring under his sway all those that desired secret power beyond of the measure of their kind. Seven rings he gave to the Dwarves; but to Men he gave nine, for Men proved in this matter as in others the readiest to his will. And all those rings that he governed he perverted, the more easily since he had a part in their making, and they were accursed, and they betrayed in the end all those that used them. The Dwarves indeed proved tough and hard to tame; they ill endure the domination of others, and the thoughts of their hearts are hard to fathom, nor can they be turned to shadows. They used their rings only for the getting of wealth; but wrath and an overmastering greed of gold were kindled in their hearts, of which evil enough after came to the profit of Sauron. It is said that the foundation of each of the Seven Hoards of the Dwarf-kings of old was a golden ring; but all those hoards long ago were plundered and the Dragons devoured them, and of the Seven Rings some were consumed by fire and some Sauron recovered.

Men proved easier to ensnare. Those who used the Nine Rings became mighty in their day, kings, sorcerers, and warriors of old. They obtained glory and great wealth, yet it turned to their undoing. They had, as it seemed, unending life, yet life became unendurable to them. They could walk, if they would, unseen by all eyes in this world beneath the sun, and they could see things in worlds invisible to mortal men; but too often they beheld only the phantoms and delusions of Sauron. And one by one, sooner or later, according to their native strength and to the good or evil of their wills in the beginning, they fell under the thraldom of the ring that they bore and under the domination of the One, which was Sauron's. And they became for ever invisible save to him that wore the Ruling Ring, and they entered into the realm of shadows. The Nazgûl were they, the Ringwraiths, the Enemy's most terrible servants; darkness went with them, and they cried with the voices of the dead.

I removed the section "and the doors of Moria were shut," if only because it was a Dwarven mine, and Luffy gets along fine with the Dwarfs of One Piece. Just avoiding confusion.

Some of the One Piece stuff got altered too, but yes I was really struck with how I could work in the Grand Fleet. That said, I am confident it will grow beyond seven of them :-) As for the kingdom bit, we have just learnt that Cavendish is a former prince, and Hajrudin seeks the crown of the giants, so why not more of them :-P And that their kingdoms fell was just marine propaganda ;-P

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