A/N Another new story? Yup, I've got tons of ideas for code geass and many others floating around in my head and this is one of them, I don't think a code geass story quite like this one has come out yet so yay I'm first.

Lelouch sat in his room staring at the chess board on his glass table, thoughts of guilt and failure filled his mind.

'Nunnally?

Gone.

Shirley?

Gone.

Euphie?

Gone.

C.C.?

Amnesia.

Suzaku?

Traitor.

Rolo?

Fake.

Sayoko?

Missing... maybe dead.

Jeramiah?

Don't know.

Kallen?

G-

no... Kallen is still here, she's still here and she's staring at me. What is that look in her eyes? Pity? Concern? Something else entirely? I don't know.'

"Lelouch... are you ok? Is there anything I can get you?"

"A time machine for me to go back and redo my rebellion would be nice, or maybe I could use it to kill the emperor when I know he would be vulnerable, or maybe I could just use it to commit suicide before I start the rebellion."

Kallen seemed to laugh dryly at the joke. She was fairly calm on the outside, but on the inside?

She looked away.

'He shouldn't be like this, seeing someone normally so strong and proud look like this and talk like that doesn't feel right at all. I want to help you Lelouch, I do, but I don't think I can really do anything unless I hear three words from you, three little words that would mean the world to me. You could lie to me, steal from me, use me and abuse me if only you would love me.'

Just then the intercom came to life.

"Zero sir, your presence is requested in cargo bay eleven. Commander Ohgi and most of your advisors say it's urgent."

Lelouch let out a sigh. He reached underneath the couch to pull out a suitcase that had a bottle of vodka in it. Unscrewing the cap and taking a swig he pulled back immediately. His nose crinkled as he stared malevolently at the bottle.

"Why would anyone drink this crap? It burns like hell and tastes bitter as can be."

"Umm...

"Right Ohgi." He interrupted then sighed. "Why the Fuck not?"

Tossing it hap hazardly behind him and throwing his mask on he walked over to the door.

"Coming?"

She gave a nod and walked behind them reaching and entering the elevator not Long after and making their way down. Lelouch in his helmet looked discreetly at Kallen.

'First Shirley now her... no I can't think like that. Kallen is strong and if anyone can survive this it's her. I need to save at least one person I care about. I wish I had some sort of sign Kallen, some way to tell if you felt the same way about me I do about you. I would rather keep it a secret but either one of us could be next. And you deserve to know, I've kept so much from her. It's the least I can do to tell her the truth about something.'

The elevator came to a stop and Lelouch held his hand out in front of her to speak for a moment.

"Kallen, there's something I have to tell you, i, I like you, as in, more than just a friend, I don't expect these feelings to be returned at all but you deserve to know this."

Her head snapped towards him.

'He likes me back? He likes me back!? He likes me back!'

She smiled as they walked into the cargo bay.

"Well in that case it's only fair I let you know that I-"

Spotlights flashed upon them and the two of them stopped to cover their faces from the blinding light.

"ITS OVER ZERO! WE KNOW ABOUT YOUR GEASS!"

"You think you can use us like that!? Think again!"

Lelouch's eyes readjusted first and narrowed as he looked at the cat walk above. Most of the upper echelon of the Black knights where pointing guns at him. Up there was also a certain snake of a prince along with a purple haired princess and everyone's favorite traitor along with a few Britannian soldiers.

His fists clenched. This was the worst possible situation at the moment.

Kallen recovered and ran in front of Lelouch to protect him.

"Wait let him explain!"

"Kallen don't tell me he's geassed you too!"

"No just give him a chance!"

"He caused the SAZ massacre and killed Euphemia!"

"YOU THINK I MEANT TO!?"

Lelouch took off his mask.

"You think I wanted that to happen!?"

"You geassed her!"

"It was an accident!"

He threw his mask to the ground and it shattered. He held his head in his hands.

"It was an accident..."

"How?" Tamaki asked

"Change is nature and nature is change. As supernatural as geass might be it still follows that law. My geass mutated on the spot. It became permanently active. I was trying to warn her about other people that might have it, what it could do, I needed to get my point across so the example I gave her was..." He choked a sob.

"To kill the Japanese." Tohdoh finished.

Lelouch merely nodded.

There was complete silence, Suzaku's jaw dropped, Kallens eyes went wide, Cornelia's eyes watered and the black knights where temporarily shocked, wondering if they where doing the right thing.

"You used it on us!" Chiba.

"Hahahahahahaha! Oh that is rich. You really are morons with no common sense."

"Hey!"

"Let me give you a reason as to why. If I had geassed you to be loyal to me or anything like that, then how in the hell are you trying to turn back stabbing traitor on me? Moreover if I had used it on you then you wouldn't even be able to see my geass as a conceivable threat because my command would have stopped you. So yeah common sense you idiots."

They all flinched, that was true, very true, it made sense. Had they been duped? Perhaps, but one major question had to be asked.

"Why? Why do all of this? You where a prince, you still are, you could have went back to Britannia and lived a cozy life so why start this rebellion?" Ohgi asked

"Why?" He whispered to himself. "At first it was Vengeance for my mother's murder, then it evolved into wanting to protect N-unnally from the emperor, then after Japan became my home Britannia took it away. They took my home away again and I wanted to get it back not just for me but for everyone that called it home."

He spoke louder this time.

"It's because I watched my own mother and sister gunned down in front of me and when I looked for help from my family I got nothing but a cold shoulder and a dose of Darwin is propaganda!"

Cornelia flinched away.

"It's because I walked through streets turned into rivers of blood and guts, filled with smoke for days looking for someone to help, I nearly died and so did Nunnally!"

Suzaku slouched. He had left them at the embassy but he knew Lelouch would go somewhere else. He didn't know it was this bad though.

"My entire life since I was ten I was living a lie! I was miserable and I still am! All I wanted to do was protect Nunnally! All I wanted to do was find out why my mom had to die! All I wanted was to have a home and for people to care about me or at least more than their own selfish desires!"

He took a deep breath and continued, his voice softer now.

"They're all gone and it's my fault... Euphie, Shirley, Nunnally, mother."

He fell to the floor on his knees.

"They're gone and I'm to blame, I only have Kallen left, everyone that gets close to me gets hurt."

"... shoot me, please."

"What? No!"

Kallen dashed to his side.

"Lelouch calm down, please!"

"No, I'm done, your all I've got left and I'm not letting you die for me."

"We aren't going to do it Lelouch"

He looked up at the black knights who had lowered their weapons.

"Oh come on just kill me!"

Shneizle obliged.

"As you wish."

He pulled out a pistol and aimed at Lelouch, center mass.

Seeing this Lelouch pushed Kallen away from him.

Shneizle fired a single bullet ripping through his chest. Kallen had tried to run back to him but was too late, receiving several blood splatters across her body. A few drops of blood hit her face, some of it drizzling down. As Lelouch leaned back she caught him. Holding onto him like the most fragile and precious gift in the world and laid him down gently. She cried and shook her head, she ran her bloodied hands through his hair. He was gasping for breath, choking on his blood.

He stopped moving.

Tears steamed freely from her face, she grasped at his motionless form, holding him tight against her own body. She let out a single wail of emotional agony before dissolving into a sobbing mess.

Sadness.

'He can't be gone.'

Denial.

'But he is, he's gone and I'll never be able to tell him how much I had loved him.' She leaned over and placed a feather light kiss on his forehead.

Acceptance.

Her eyes narrowed, gently setting down his body, she stood up. And in a spit second pulled out her pistol and pointed her pistol at the bloodthirsty prince. A shot rang out.

Rage.