Time and Time Again

Chapter Three

It had been about a month since I'd joined Team Flash—and yes, in agreeance with Cisco we were totally calling it that—and it felt like the missing part of my life that I never could have imagined I didn't have. In the last few weeks, I hadn't messed up with regards to my powers at all, and it had even been fun, messing around with them somewhat, mostly with Cisco and occasionally Barry, with Harrison and Caitlin disapproving on the side.

I'd even met with Joe, Barry's adoptive father, and learned from Barry about his past with his mother's death and his father being in prison for a crime he didn't commit—I fully believed every word of the story; there was no reason not to—and still, even despite his opening up to me, I hadn't had the heart to do so myself, not really.

Caitlin, however, knew most everything about my current personal issues and my background. She was truly the closest friend I'd made here at S.T.A.R. Labs.

Which was why when she approached me at my spot reading my latest book in my favourite place, the treadmill room, I couldn't help but grin and bite my lip, pretending to ignore her while she tried to get my attention.

"Oh, don't be an ass, Riley!" She cried eventually, shoving my shoulder lightly. "I have some new meds for you to try for the insomnia." She waved a pill bottle in front of my face and I smiled this time and took it from her.

"Thanks, Cait." I responded simply and she smiled back and left me to my book once more.

This was how most days went—I had no training of any kind and my powers weren't exactly suitable in their current state to actually go out and help Barry, since really I just got in his way, so instead I'd remain in the Cortex with Caitlin, Cisco and Harrison—who occasionally disappeared?—and just read a book in the quiet room when nothing interesting was happening.

The whole thing was pleasant, and it gave me somewhere to go other than to visit my mother, which had really been my only option in the past, given that I had never allowed myself to socialise enough to have any actual friends beyond a few limited exes, and in my experience, nobody really stayed friends with their exes.

Caitlin had figured out herself that I had issues with insomnia, and she'd taken it upon herself to help me with that—it was her immediacy in nature that probably sparked out friendship, and without it I probably would have steered clear of her mildly too-cheery nature.

I wasn't entirely sure whether it was her biological methods of treating the insomnia (as she said, to tap into the time perception part of my brain using the medication and, in some biological terms I really couldn't understand all that well, utilise the mix between my abilities and my body's natural state to make me sleep longer), or simply the change in my life that was helping, but whatever it was, I was grateful for it.

On top of this, I was pretty sure Harrison had been tracking where I was putting the money he was paying me for a job I wasn't actually doing. Because I'd been receiving money to my account, from the man himself, that was more than the quota I'd expected, and I had my suspicions that he was aware that I needed the money and had made me, basically, a charity case. I didn't want to mention this and seem insensitive, however, so it remained unsaid.

With how life was going, it had been a few days since I'd visited my mother, and a few days before Christmas seemed like a decent time to do so.

I packed up my book and slung my messenger bag over my shoulder, waving to Caitlin on the way out, and she called from her station, "Say 'hi' to her for me!"

The walk there was uneventful, and soon enough I met with Nancy, her nurse, who ensured me that nothing out of the ordinary had happening since I'd been gone. Even so, perhaps something out of the ordinary may have been a good thing once in a while.

I entered the room and was greeted with a smile from my mother—of whom I was an almost spitting image, not that it was ever acknowledged—and admired immediately how Nancy had done her hair today. It sat up with a blue bow that contrasted with the deep red of her hair, only a few shades lighter than my own, and was woven into a braid.

"Hello, Louise, how are you today? Your hair looks lovely." I sat down in the seat by her bed, and she frowned slightly.

"It does, doesn't it?" Her frown persisted. "Sorry, what's your name again? Wasn't it a Mr… Mr. Jamie?"

I forced a smile. Of course, this has been happening ever since I stopped visiting every single day. Her memory is diminishing more and more. "Mr. James, Louise. But Riley is fine, remember?"

I should have, in hindsight, asked Nancy if it was a touchy day, one of those days, because my mother's eyes immediately glossed over. "My son's name is Riley. He's 15, and he never comes to visit me, did you know?" She huffed in a way that was an indication that she still felt 35 instead of 45. "He's probably just having that rebellious teenage phase, you know the one? I'm sure he'll come visit soon."

I nodded along. "I'm sure he will, Louise." I decided to move on. "My friend, Caitlin, says 'hi'. Do you remember her?"

She nodded happily. "The small girl who came with you before? Of course, she was lovely, wasn't she?" Her manners, staring out the window repeatedly and smiling constantly, gave her an air of ignorant bliss, which was all we could have asked for from her, having been in the hospital for what she thought was a few months, but we knew to be 10 years now. "I think she'd make a good wife for you." She proclaimed seriously, and I had to laugh at that—she'd said it even while Caitlin was here, in a hushed whisper that she thought Cait couldn't hear.

"I told you Louise, I don't fall in love with women like I do with men." I said earnestly, getting my book out of my bag and setting it in my lap.

She nodded. "Ah, yes, yes, I know. My Riley likes boys, too, but he doesn't accept it, even for himself." She was staring out the window, in another place again. "Ever since his father left us, he thinks it's his fault because he likes boys." She looked back at me. "You should talk to him, one day. Tell him that it's alright for him to like boys, too. I'm sure he'd like that."

I tried to gloss over the soft spot of the past and nodded. "I'm sure he would." And it was true – something like that probably would have helped young Riley. "How about we read now? I've got the book you requested." I quickly changed the subject and felt my chest clench at the too-young grin she gave, one too untrue to her years.

I was back at S.T.A.R. Labs later that day and to all of our surprise Barry handed out individual gifts to each of us. "Merry Christmas," He spoke earnestly. "Just a small token of my gratitude, for everything you guys have done for me this year."

I couldn't help but join in with Cait, who 'aww'ed at the gesture.

"I think I speak on behalf of my colleagues when I say you've been a gift for us, Barry." Harrison spoke, clearly humbled by our friend.

"I got you something, too, Bar," I shot the brunette a wink. "You'll just have to come get it from me later." These coy exchanges had become normal, and Barry even returned the flirting on occasion. This time he just laughed.

"What's that?" Cait gestured towards the cylinder in Barry's hands.

"This," He began, "Is compliments of Iris—Grandma Esther's famous eggnog."

Cisco shuffled to the side to set his gift down with a click towards the eggnog. "That's what I'm talking about."

Harrison nodded to himself, a gesture I didn't miss. "Maybe later for me," He spoke as he exited the room. "Wouldn't want to drink and drive."

Barry glanced at the three of us, worried. "Did I say something wrong?" He murmured.

I was aware of the circumstances through conversations with Cait, so I shook my head sadly along with two 'no's from Cait and Cisco.

"He, um, this used to be his favourite time of the year," Cisco said in a hushed tone, careful of Harrison's retreating form. "But the accident happened before Christmas, so, kind of ruined the holidays."

"I'm gonna go get him a present," Cait said decidedly. "Maybe that will cheer him up." She glanced between Barry and the present he'd given her. "Thank you, very much."

Barry nodded earnestly. "Yeah."

As she left, Barry turned to Cisco and I. "So, what are you guys doing for Christmas?"

Cisco spoke up begrudgingly. "Probably have to go by the family's place—try not to murder my brother, again."

The two of us listening shared a chuckle. Cisco and I were vaguely aware of each other's familial situations.

"How about you, Riley?" Barry questioned, and I shrugged as well.

"Probably just spend it with family," I brushed off, ignoring the vague look I received from Cisco, prompting me to actually be honest with Barry—unlikely.

In an attempt to move the focus of attention from me, I turned on Barry. "How about you? Going to throw some super romantic gesture and proclaim your love for Iris, yet?" I wiggled my eyebrows, and he chuckled a little.

Cisco, by this point, had fixed his attention between something at his workspace and the two of us.

Barry scratched at his neck a little, a nervous tick I'd noticed he acquired when talking, particularly, about Iris. "Well, I'm not—I'm not so sure about my feelings for Iris anymore, you know?" This was surprising to hear, even from him. "I'm sort of glad she has Eddie—she is my best friend, and I mean, I'll always love her, but I think there might be someone else in the picture." He raised his eyebrows suggestively, and began to backtrack out of the room. "So, who knows."

I frowned and was suddenly aware of my heartbeat. "Is it Felicity?" I called as he ducked out of sight around the corner.

I heard him laugh and could almost picture him shaking his head. "No!"

I turned to Cisco when I was sure Barry was out of hearing range and he shook his head. "Oh, don't even start on me," He raised his hands defensively. "Save that for Cait."

The playful air was lost the next day as the team, including Joe, stood around in the Cortex.

"The witness described seeing a yellow blur just like the one that killed Barry's mother."

As Joe finished his recount from the attack on Mercury Labs the night before, there was a very brief silence throughout the room before Cisco spoke up.

"Then we need to get cracking and stop this speed psycho." Cisco hesitated as he put an oversized candy cane in his mouth. "That—I wasn't trying to give him a name."

I snorted.

"The crime scene at Mercury Labs was on a floor with highly secured vaults, and the witness said he was looking for something." Barry cut in.

"Whatever it was, he wanted it badly enough to kill for it." Harrison mused. He had his thoughtful thinking face on and it almost made me want to laugh despite the blatant seriousness of the situation.

"Doctor," Joe began. "What do you know about this Mercury Labs?"

"Mercury was one of S.T.A.R. Labs' major competitors until our little setback," Harrison spoke with the same somehow emotive coldness, as usual. "And then it," He paused for a quick, loud clap for effect, "catapulted to the forefront led by Dr. Christina McGee, brilliant but egocentric physicist." He pulled up her picture on the screens behind Joe.

"Says here," Cisco began, glancing between us and his tablet. "Dr. McGee has secured half a billion dollars in private funding to develop, and I quote, "Prototypes for the technology of the future."

I felt a jolt of excitement. "Wait, does she mean tachyons?" I started tapping at my watch face excitedly.

"Exactly." Harrison nodded. "Tina's messing with tachyons; superluminal particles."

Joe glanced, clueless, between us. "Of course… So, what could someone do with one of these," His hand gestures insinuated help, so I provided.

"Tachyons."

"Thank you." Joe nodded at me.

"Well," Harrison shrugged and squeezed his hands into a fist. "I don't know. Become invincible? If you could devise a matrix stable enough to harness their power, you could… travel faster than light."

I nodded along with him, trying to break it down further for Joe's sake. "The theory is that if you could harness the power of tachyons, you could send messages back—and potentially, forward—in time. And, if you went even further than that, well."

"Time travel?" Joe's eyebrows rose incredulously.

I nodded and Barry cut in, somewhere between determination and frustration—an expected response to the sudden resurfacing of his mother's killer. "He's gonna try to get them again, so we need to get what Mercury has and use it as a lure."

"Exactly right," Harrison agreed and began to pull himself out from behind the desk. "Cisco, Caitlin, let's start engineering a trap." I didn't expect him to make his way towards me following these words. "Riley, a word?"

I nodded and followed him into the treadmill room, where, despite the closed door, he spoke in hushed tones of immediacy.

"Your powers have the potential to cancel out those of The Flash."

I nodded.

"We may need to use them against this new threat—if we assume that his powers are the same as Barry's, you might just be able to stop him completely."

My nodding continued. "Then, I'll practice with Barry?"

Harrison held up a hand. "No." He shook his head quickly, and there was a real evidence of urgency in the way he spoke. "It's very unlikely that Barry would agree to you building your ability to render his speed useless." I felt like there was something wrong with that—I didn't, personally, think Barry would react that way, but Harrison had known him longer, so I let it be. "This will be just you and me, one on one, when he's not around. I think this study of your abilities is long overdue."

I nodded and turned to leave when there was a moment of finality, but was stopped at the door.

"And Riley?"

I turned and nodded. "Don't tell Cisco or Caitlin about this, either."

I paused momentarily, trying to place why something felt so wrong somewhere in my chest, but brushed it off, gave a final salute and left the room.

A/N: Sorry for such a long wait, but I can only apologise so much because I am a. in my final year of high school, Year 12 (Australia, haha), and it's hectic as shit because I'm an attempted overachiever. I'm also trying to maintain outside of school stuff and writing an original novel of my own, so I haven't had a great deal of time. Trust me to find time the week before mid-year exams, haha.

I have every intent to continue this story, don't worry about that. It just might take a while.

Thanks to those who reviewed and gave feedback! xx

So yeah, we're finally intersecting with the canon of the show, in Episode 9, The Man in the Yellow Suit! The next chapter will continue on from here :)

P.S. That season finale though, for season 2. Holy crap?!