A/N: OK, so I started writing this story about 6 months ago and became so invested in it, that I've only now decided to start uploading what's already written, so thier is plenty more ready to go. In all honesty, it's been a while since I've written anything, which makes me a little nervous about sharing it, especially considering how dark and twisty it's going to get ! I'm not gonna lie, it's not for the faint of heart hence the M rating. I don't want to give to much away yet, so will post trigger warnings at the beginning of each chapter. Read, review and PM me if you have questions ! Enjoy ! DM
Trigger Warning : Attempted suicide
It was the night of the Dark Commander's 26th birthday and Regina found herself on the highest roof of the castle. Her birthdays had hardly ever been celebrated and this one was no different, it had just been an ordinary day where everything remained the same. Except that Regina realised something about herself, it was like she had been woken up somehow.
Never before had she stopped to reflect on the things she had done and what she'd become but today she did, she realised that her existence was nothing but a black hole of darkness that would suck up all the light and goodness leaving nothing but misery and destruction in its wake, to anything or anyone who came near. She's a monster, devoid of emotion, nothing but a weapon for an evil tyrant in a sick and twisted life.
It's suddenly felt all too much for Regina, the guilt, disgust and self-loathing, she felt an inability to carry on living this way and stepped up to the edge of the roof prepared to end it all. As Regina took one long last deep breath and just moments before she leapt to her death, the air shimmered, the Blue Fairy appeared before her.
"Regina, please don't do this, you are not the monster you think you are" Blue said compassionately. Regina just stood there in shock for a few moments before gingerly taking a step back from the ledge. who was this mysterious woman who appeared before her out of nowhere, why was she here and what did she want ? They just some of the questions that now invaded the forefront of Regina's fractured and desperate mind.
"Who are you and what is it that you want from me" Regina asked with confusion and slight irritability at being interrupted in what she considered her most courageous moment.
"Ny name is Blue, leader of the fairies and a messenger of fate" Blue said proudly and with unwavering righteousness.
Regina eyed the fairy cautiously. The fairies well known throughout the entire kingdom some people saw then as the epitome of light and goodness bestowing gifts and granting wishes to those they deemed worthy. Others saw them as a parasite on the back of humanity meddling in people's lives and interfering with things that was none of their business. Who were they to judge what was right and what is wrong, to decide who was worthy and who wasn't.
After her father's death Regina wished so many times for the fairies to aid her, to rescue her from the brutality of her mother and the darkness that surrounded her, but no one ever came so eventually she just stopped wishing. As an innocent child she was'nt worthy of their help so why was she worthy now after all that she'd done and what she had become.
"Then you know who I am and what I have done. The world will be a better and safer place without me" Regina said bitterly her eyes filled with shame.
"No it won't" Blue said firmly "For your true destiny is only starting to begin". Regina just stared at the blue fairy with a floored expression on her face, this wasn't happening, it wasn't right. Regina had accepted her death she was up here to end it all, her fight was ove loopr and so was the reign of terror inflicted by her darkness.
"No" Regina spat angerily "Not now, you had your chance, so many times I wished for your help and never received it, you could of saved me from what I became instead you let me become this monster" Regina said accusingly.
"Please let me explain" Blue said pleadingly "I heard your wishes Regina and I prayed for the day I could come to you but it is here now and all I ask is for you to listen. If you choose to jump and end this life I will not stop you or you can choose to believe what I'm about to tell you" Blue said honestly and watched intently as Regina's soul battled between hearing the fairy out or dismissing her immediately. Blue let out a small sigh of relief when Regina gave a slight nod of her head for the fairy to continue with what she had to say.
"There is hope Regina, everything you wish for light, goodness, redemption is coming to you and with it you will finally be able to free yourself from your mother's tyranny and end the dark queens reign over this land." Blue said her voice sure and unwavering. Regina just looked at the fairy with disbelief in her eyes how could she be worthy of redemption, in her opinion that ship had long since sailed.
"How and why now" Regina asked cautiously. The blue fairy just smiled at her softly.
"I do not know why now is the chosen time I can only guess that its because you share your true destiny with someone else and you will walk that path together. All I know is you will find this young blonde woman through an act of righteous." Blue said seriously her eyes penetrating Regina's with absolute belief and sincerity. Regina lost herself in thought for a few moments and as she finally was about to speak the blue fairy held up her hand to stop her.
"Have faith Regina, all you seek is right within your grasp the real question is do you have the courage to seize it" and with that final statement the blue fairy disappeared leaving Regina alone on the edge of the rooftop once more.
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"Emma you don't understand, everything I do and have done has been to protect you" Snow said pleadingly at her now grown up daughter.
"Mother I'm 18 years old, i dont need protecting anymore" Emma shouted angerily.
"Please Emma you have to trust me" Snow snapped.
"Trust you ? My whole life you've hidden things from me. Every time I wanted to go into town or play with the other kids you always said no and never given a reason why, I'm 18 years old and ive barely left this house." Emma screamed at her mother, tears now streaming down her face. Snow started to feel her own tears roll onto her face.
"I have my reasons Emma" Snow mumbled apologetically.
"Then explain them to me" Emma pleaded.
"I can't" Snow firmly stated.
"You can't leave me locked up forever" Emma screamed back, not noticing her father enter the room behind her.
"Emma" Snow tried her voice shaking with emotion.
"I hate you" Emma shouted angrily before storming into her bedroom and slamming the door. David walked over to were Snow stood now sobbing and wrapped his arms around his tiny wife.
"What did I miss" David asked compassionately as Snow buried her head into his chest.
"I don't know what to do anymore, David" Snow sobbed. "I want to protect her and keep her safe, if Cora ever finds us..." Snow said weakly emotion now causing her to shake in her husbands arms.
"You could always tell her the truth" David asked hopefully, knowing that it Snow couldn't then they may well lose Emma for good.
"I can't do that to her, she shouldn't have to worry, its my burden to bare" Snow cried into David's chest.
"I know Mary, but I'm scared that we will lose her if you don't" David replied softly but with a hint of worry in his tone.
"That's what scares me, we've lied to her, her whole life and even if I do tell her the truth now she might leave anyway" Snow mumbled.
"Maybe that's a chance we just have to take" David replied hopefully. They had, had this discussion before when Emma was 16 and again a few months ago but each time Snow had told him she wasnt ready and neither was Emma.
"I just don't know" Snow started to say the same thing again but David moved out of the embrace to look his wife in the eyes.
"Emma's ready" David said firmly "I think its time you were too" he added a little more compassionately.
"Maybe your right" Snow said defeatedly and David pulled her back into his arms.
"You dont have to do this alone Mary, we will do it together just like we've always done everything" David said sincerely, this time it was Snow who pulled away from the embrace.
"You're right it is time, we should talk to her tomorrow" Snow said finally in agreement with her husband.
"Your see I'm right about this I promise" David said cheerfully "Now how about we get some sleep" David said holding out his hand and smiled gently at his wife who managed to return a weak one of her own as she took his hand and then they went to bed.
As soon as Emma heard her parents bedroom door close Emma quietly got off the bed and walked over to her small wardrobe, pulling out a small satchel and finishing packing the last few things that she knew her mother would notice if they were missing. Emma had been prepared to run away for a few days now but she wanted to give her parents one last chance to be honest with her, about what they were bidding and what it was they were so afraid of her entire life, and just now was they're lat chance. Emma pulled out an envelope that was hidden between some of the blankets that made up part of her mattress on her bed and tucked it under her arm before putting on her satchel and tiptoeing out of her room, shoes in hand. Emma snuck quietly through the small cottage and left via the backdoor in the kitchen stopping momentarily to deposit the letter for her parents on the kitchen table. Once Emma was outside she pulled on her boots and ran into the forest glancing back only once to make sure no one had heard her leave before turning away and for the first time in her life she finally felt free.
Snow woke at the crack of dawn just like she always did and was ready to tell Emma everything. Brimming with positivity she sing-songed her way through the house to the kitchen to begin making breakfast. It wasn't til Snow was halfway through beating the eggs she finally saw the strange envelope on the table. Snow put the eggs down, wandered over and picked it up immediately recognising the words 'mom and dad' written in Emma's scrawly script. Snow ripped open the letter, her heart cracked and her stomach plummeted as she started to read it.
'Dear mom and dad. I have gone...'
"David" Snow screamed dropping the letter back on the table before sinking to her knees and started to wail inconsolably. A few moments later David stumbled sleeperly into the kitchen.
"What, what is it" David said in horror upon seeing the state his wife was in. Snow managed to point a shaky finger at the letter on the table.
"She's gone, Emma's gone" Snow sobs "I can't, I can't" she managed before another wave of sobbing overthrew her body. David rushed across the room and snatched up th letter and began to read it out loud.
'Dear Mom and Dad,
I have gone and I'm sorry for leaving this way but you left me with no choice. For years I begged you for the truth, for a reason why I couldn't go and play with the other kids, or go into town by myself. I asked you explain what is was that frightened you so much that you I kept me prisoner in this house for 18 years. I understand that everyone has secrets and some are not to share but yours did this not mine.
Please understand it wasnt you or the lies that finally made me leave it was my own need for freedom. I want to see things with my own eyes to meet new people. I want to see what life is really like, and now its time I truly started to live mine.
I love both of you and that will never change. I don't hate or blame you for my desire to leave I know you are good, loving people and you raised a strong woman but that's just it, I'm a grown woman now not a child and need to make my own decisions and live my own life the way I choose to.
Please try not to worry about me I will be fine. I will return someday I promise your my parents and I love you
Emma xx
P.S Please don't come after me just trust me instead ! '
David finished and put the letter back down on the table whilst silent tears rolled down his cheeks. Emma was strong, she was brave and yet filled with compassion, she was true, she was special. David knew in his heart that she would be ok, Emma had grown from a clumsy inquisitive child into an amazing woman he was truly proud of. Emma would be ok. Agreeing with his mental conclusions, David went to his wife and dropped down onto the floor beside her and pulled her into his arms.
"She will be fine Mary, I promise" David said repeatedly with absolute belief as he tried to console his distraught wife. "Believe me. Trust in our daughter. She will be back, I promise" David continued unwaveringly and Snow knew in her heart he was right.